Molly: Driving the Route to Hell

( Thanks to my Editor Kenji Sato.)

"This is what I get for being a lifelong unrepentant wise-ass," Molly grumbled, as she struggled with the old-fashioned door opener on her 1950s vintage school bus.

She smiled with forced pleasantness, as a young boy boarded with an enormous leather briefcase. A serious, pale towhead. He passed her a small envelope marked in an adult hand in pencil," For Mr. Peloquin".

Molly had gotten used to this. Her passengers saw her not as Molly, but as the bus driver they expected. Inside the envelope, were a few coins... the weekly bus fare to transport this serious scholar to and from his parochial school. "Mr. Peloquin" had been his bus driver decades earlier.

Some things about this strange after-death job had been explained to her... others were left as a mystery.

Oh yes... I did say 'after-death' job... you did not think that your chores were done simply because you had died? "Eternal rest grant unto them O Lord..." Molly thought with some bitterness. What a joke. She had slaved away at this after-death job for decades.

The joke being that it was "the bus to hell", but it never... or at least, not yet... had taken anyone to the end of the line. Molly drove new arrivals to their destination on the route to hell and dropped them off. She really had no clue what lay in store for her passengers at their destination. But for the time she had been doing her job, it seemed that their initial destination was not their final one.

Sometimes, she had to pick the same ones up to go further down the line. Other drivers got the presumably happier job of bringing them further up the line... to a better place she assumed, but she had no way of knowing.

It was eternity... so time actually had no relevance. How "long" one passenger or the other spent at their initial destination or another was not calculable.

There were anomalies. The serious, towheaded boy... he never got off... well he never got off on her route. He found the seat behind the driver seat and sat there quietly during her entire shift... when she returned the bus to the garage, he got off just before at the "terminal". Molly always laughed that it was still a bus terminal, even for the dead.

Molly had expected to "go to hell" on her death, but this was NOT hell. It was eternity...or a realm of eternity. Clearly... in Molly's mind this was not heaven... but NOT hell.

In no way was she in torment. Her body had achieved perfection... not some abstract perfection, but the perfect possible for Molly. Her hair... and not just the glorious crown of dark red curls on her head, but, ahem, all her hair was luxuriant. Her teeth white and straight, her eyes clear (no glasses in eternity). She was just a bit taller in death due to her perfected posture. She knew she was nude, but appeared to all others as clothed... jeans, sneakers, and a large sweatshirt... as the clothing was an illusion, no underthings were needed. There were no bodily functions that would stain her outer layer, so no inner layer needed to catch "accidents". Certainly, her firm breasts needed no support.

Going without a bra had been one of those life luxuries... as soon as she had been safely at home, she had stripped the cursed thing off... here, wherever here was, that sort of thing was totally unnecessary.

Still... at the end of her shift... Molly was tired. There was a mental, moral, spiritual fatigue that came from knowing... not explicitly... but at some basic level... that this realm of eternity was temporary... temporary... another one of those mortal-bound time words that had little relevance here. And yet... she had seen evidence.

Those passengers that she drove from one stop on her route to the other. Why would her fate be any different.? All questions had NOT been answered... eternity still was a puzzle.

She would sleep... Molly reclined in her private space... you did not know privacy was valued in eternity? Her "clothing" vanished... she would sleep exposed to her God...and dreams would come... and in them, sometimes, when she was ready answers... answers to her deep questions about her continued existence.

No "On-boarding" in Eternity

There is no formal "on-boarding'' in eternity. At least as Molly experienced on her arrival in eternity. Death. Well, yes, death is the journey that brings you to eternity.

Molly awoke in eternity after what she perceived as a very deep, dream-filled sleep. The dreams wiped any deathbed fears she had... and yes, Molly died peacefully in bed... although, she does not know that. A kind of amnesia affected her... many memories of her past life were "forgotten", the essentials of what made Molly, remained. She had the same wisecracking snarky personality... not that there was anyone to wisecrack with...

Molly's first experience after waking from that deep sleep was to accept her dreams as reality. She had no clue as to what she looked like in life... as far as she knew this was life at least a continuation of life... that she knew. There was a vague understanding that she had not always been in this realm... but she did not dwell on those thoughts. She had work to do.

Her training for driving the bus to hell was naturally done in her dreams... she had her dreams in her private space... comfortably, unashamedly nude... although it is fair to say she did not perceive herself naked, at least, not in any self-conscious way. Indeed, in eternity, being aware of being unclothed was ridiculous... one was more likely to be aware of being clothed... for the sake of the others... the newbies.

Molly learned that all her passengers were being gradually made aware of their situation... especially the newly arrived in eternity... the newly dead. The transition was meant to be as free of trauma as death can be... well the death part might be traumatic, but the transition to eternity was difficult, especially for those who in life did not believe in an afterlife. Actually, even for believers, the transition was critical because... well, we are all human and we get stuff wrong, sometimes very wrong.

No sitting on clouds, playing harps... and NO WHITE ROBES! And certainly, on the route to hell, no blazing glory to enrapture.

The bus ride was clearly for those that found that mode of transport comforting, or at least familiar. Early on, Molly learned that her passengers did not die as they appeared to her—what she saw was their journey persona. The form, the way they perceived themselves... the best way for them to continue their journey... their "costume" on THE WAY.

Students of all ages heading to their classrooms. Craftspeople heading to their workshops. For some dreaming of healing, the change in awareness happened in familiar comfortable surroundings.

As they progressed on the way, a location might have brought them to a level of consciousness that required a change of locale... a pilgrimage to another spot on THE WAY was required.

Molly did not see her place in all of this as anything that made her special... it was her "after-death job." Whether others had an after-death job, she did not know for sure... well yes, she did know that there were other bus drivers... nicer buses, too, but beyond her circle of expertise. There were only drivers and passengers... and what exactly the passenger did at their specific stop on the way was unknown.

And there was that boy... the one who sat behind her every day...

_______________

The Towheaded Boy

Always... the tow-headed boy. Why? This came to Molly in her after-shift dreams. I almost wrote "nightly", a silly mortal habit. No night or day in eternity. The blessing of the private space... the illusion of mortal routine can be maintained... as long as necessary.

The "Why?" was not answered... not in that dream time. Molly gained other knowledge... in no order it seems to her... not chronologically—again, a silly mortal concept, nor in order of importance. Molly was getting the puzzle pieces... that was all. In due course, she could assemble them to solve the puzzle of her immortality, but for now... pieces, oddly shaped, colorful pieces.

She learned—rather, her "perfected" body telegraphed—that she is a mother... never the past tense, once and always a mother. Logically, she had had lovers... still that remained a missing piece of the puzzle.

Her body reflected some of her experience and had settled in a time that she had enjoyed the most. She was neither old nor young.

Some of the knowledge her dreams gave her were not of her life... part of the puzzle of her immortality in that they were the background pieces... the landscape so to speak. Not all the people she met in eternity had acquired their perfected bodies. She surmised that there was something different about her situation. But... Why?

Odd bits... pieces that could not be connected, foods she had loved, drinks she had savored, sunsets she had seen, the feeling of being awake at dawn by the sea.

Bits of her mortality. It occurred to Molly that her purpose was not her job driving the bus; that job only tired her, so she could peacefully dream of acquiring the pieces of her LIFE, and once assembled, that would reflect on her place in immortality—it would define her eternity.

The thought filled her with hope... and dread. What if after all, she was destined for torment? That chill faded quickly, and a wave of merciful bliss came over her... an unexplained bliss that lasted until it was time for her shift... her driving on the route to hell.

Since time had no meaning here... she rose when ready and "dressed". No showering, or other ablutions. Once she stood up, her bare skin was covered in her garb of the day.... colors and textures varied, but she favored the sneakers, blue jeans and sweatshirt.

Her first fare of the day was the towheaded boy... always the same in his school uniform: blue shirt, black tie, dark trousers, lace up shoes. He was from an era where sneakers really NEVER were worn to school.

As usual, he carried his tan-leather briefcase. But today, his face so often solemn, wore a small smile. A smile of knowledge, of secrets.

As soon as Molly noticed, it was replaced by his usual solemn expression. Had she imagined?

She had never questioned any of her passengers. Not that she was forbidden, it just did not seem to be in the cards. She hoped a dream would clarify the rules in this regard. But then, who was Molly to follow rules?

So she asked, "Something different?"

"Oh yes!" he answered brightly, "... but I cannot tell you... not yet."

"Okay, then... keeper of secrets!"

Molly was pleased beyond all reason to have this interchange with this young, solemn creature.

"Well, it is not exactly a secret... I can't tell you because I don't understand it, myself. The dreams you know... never explain anything fully... but I am sure it is something very good."

Thus began Molly's conversations with the towheaded boy. Molly guessed early on that this was his guise along the WAY. He spoke as an ancient being... or at least an old man.

He shared much of his mortal life, at least until age 12 or so... his time at school, his parents, his younger brother. Molly was jealous that he had more pieces to his life puzzle than she did... much of this part of her was yet unknown. And yet, this "old man" was still in the form of a 12-year-old boy... while she was a mature woman.

When she mentioned this in conversation... the wise old head said, "The progress along the way is NOT linear. One may have many pieces of the puzzle, but lacking crucial pieces, it still may not make sense."

Molly felt that now she had a companion on the journey... not her journey. They had shared, she knew some of his path and he hers... it was a shared journey, at least parts of it.

As she shared... she found that her dreams provided more puzzle pieces. Not only pieces but solutions, puzzle bits fitting together... faces of her children appeared and a loving, patient spouse. Where they were, how they were doing, was still a mystery. As things fell into place, she understood... she had to be reminded that this was the solution, the solving of the puzzle clarified her eternity. It was each of her loved one's responsibility to solve the puzzle of their own fate... a mother and wife can only do so much.

_______________

Companions on the Journey

The tow-headed boy was not the only passenger Molly reacted with...but he was the constant. He was always there...from the beginning of her shift to just before she returned the bus to the barn.

But there were lulls in their talks...which Molly filled by conversing with other passengers. Many would not share much...especially the "new arrivals'' or so she guessed that is who they were. Still a bit stunned she gauged by their recent change of circumstance. Yeah.she mused...death sucks...or certainly dying sucks.

For Molly at least so far death itself...this eternity. Her eternity was not so bad, never hungry, cold, or sad (although that would change). No pain.

She was in great shape ...for a corpse she darkly mused. But of course NOT a corpse...very much "alive" in the afterlife way.

The bits of sharing from those who were more along in their journey on the WAY. Some deep memory suggested to her that this was the WAY...not the journey, not the route to hell, or heaven...simply the WAY...all traveled the way.

All traveled differently at a different pace...with stops along the WAY. Some travelers were perplexed that the WAY did not correspond to their preconceived notion of the afterlife. They stubbornly resisted the messages of their dreams.

Molly could not judge...she was mostly still mystified at why she was still working after death. But she came to appreciate the plight of these other souls. Not right or wrong, just very different.

Molly's dreams reacquainted her with her greatest emotions in life. So not just the background of the puzzle but her theme music. Some dreams were a riot of laughter...Molly would wake up with tears of joy in her eyes. Other dreams left her wracked with sobs, of sorrow or regret.

Sweet songs played in her head of family events, milestones in her married life and of her children growing up.

And for the first time in death a time of rapture...her breathing quickened...her breasts swelled, her nipples erect...her toes curled and then the release. Molly was blushing as she started her shift. And her eyes were averted as the young boy boarded the bus.

To her surprise...he did not question her lack of greeting...instead he greeted her "Hi Molly!"

Her head spun around to stare...at him." How did you know? "How do you know my name?" (Because they had never addressed each other by name.)

He blinked...momentarily confused: "Hmm...good question...I think I must have always known it...but now was the time to say it...Molly this is my last trip with you"

Molly looked at him perplexed...she was so used to her constant companion on the bus...Her mouth hung open she was speechless.

"It is O.K. Molly ...all will be well" he intoned...sounding older now than he usually did... I won't be getting off at my usual stop at the end of your shift. " "In fact, that is my stop coming up now."

Lucky for Molly the bus practically drove itself...so she did not panic as she looked ahead. As far as she knew the bus had never stopped at this point on the way...and as the young boy alighted from the bus he was transformed...suddenly he was a tall naked middle aged man...in the blink of an eye. His naked form was covered...that slight lapse was unusual. She had not seen any others of her passengers naked even for an instant...but then she had not seen any of them transformed before her eyes in such a fashion. He turned and smiled...no longer the little boy but a balding man in his 40's. As though he read her mind..." Sorry Molly...if that was awkward for you...I could not be a boy and enter this place. All will be well Molly. Bye."

With that he entered his next stage on the way.

Losing her companion on the way made Molly feel she had a setback ...so she was not prepared for her next dream cycle. Well really you never were prepared...the dreams were almost always a surprise...sometimes they took up from where the last dream cycle left off back when something different was presented ...it could be very different.

This dream...had her meeting someone...someone she knew as deeply as she could know anything she had NOT met in life.

In the dream she was clothed...as if for an interview...the person across from her...not male nor female...neither clothed nor naked not young...but she guessed impossibly old ...with a voice she did not hear with her ears but deep in her being.

"Molly we are deeply pleased with you" Not a royal we but a collective we. This being spoken as it spoke for several. "and we feel it is time for you to move on...we have a new job for you."

Dang Molly thought...that is what you get for being competent. Even after death someone will find something for you to do.

Her new job would start when she woke. There was another dream...kind of a follow up from eternity HR: Eternity would not be a time of endless bliss...at least not for Molly, it was a time of continual learning and adventure. Being companionable to others on the WAY.