More Tales From the Guilds Ch. 12

Adora Belle had to admit that the logic was (as usual) flawless. A little alarming since her husband was still in the Postmaster position but eventualy he would retire and since time means nothing to golems, Gladys would be in perfect line to take his place. A vision of Gladys in a severe blue and gold suit, or even an entirely gold suit, floated across her imagination. The Council of Churches, Temples, Sacred Groves and Big Ominous Rocks was in for a surprise when the avatar of Fedecks, messenger of the gods, turned out to be a goddess!

Dorfl offered his arm to Gladys and asked politely, "Would You Care For An Accompaniment To Schmatta The Tailors, Gladys?"

The prospective Postmistress seemed to think this over for a few minutes, possibly torn between her previous Independent Woman incarnation behind the counter and her new very feminine and attractive form. Then, coming to a decision, she replied, "Thank-You, Dorfl, I Would." And the two of them strode off.

"She said she wasn't contemplating marriage. Daniellarina, what have you done?"

The sculptor turned her palms upward and shrugged. "Well, don't clay people deserve happiness just as much as the rest of us?"

* * * * *

If Rolf and Twyla had been delighted with the arrival of Fluffles the Kh'olli, introduction to Stanley the swamp dragon set off an aerial display above the ornamental pond in the Vimes-Ramkin estate. Within an octaday. the Squad of Six, (AKA 'Them') was alternatively dashing and cruising the skies of Ankh-Morpork. Lady Sybil and her friend Helena tried to come up with some reason why the children shouldn't but with two dogs and two swamp dragons in attendance and both the Watch and Guild of Bouncers, Bodyguards and Last Resort Lenders in 'reserve' it was difficult to imagine what kind of trouble could happen to them.

"If anything," Helena Wiggs mused, "whatever trouble might occur around them will likely be of their own making. I wonder, though" she said to her husband, "if more time on the throwing knife range wouldn't be a good idea."

B.A. Wiggs snorted. "There are two headstones in the Small Gods Cemetery as evidence that both children are quite capable of inflicting suicide on anyone foolish enough to attempt to molest them. You're over-thinking this."

Helena nodded. Yes, she thought, she probably was.

* * * * *

At the same time this conversation happened, the Squad was hovering just off the edge of the Palace roof. As good Morporkians, both Sammy and Li were always happy to watch anything that resembled street theater and right now they were watching the Patrician, Lady Margolotta, Commander Vimes, the Ridcully brothers and Mr. Nutt watch Constable Pediment watch the Omniscope. It wasn't very exciting but it was what there was and Sammy had his father's permission.

"Zo," Lady Margolotta began, "vhen Pediment zees something suspicious he rings zis bell und a zenior wizard comes qvickly to exhamine vhat zer gargoyle has zeen. If zer wizard is alarmed by zer new goings on in Loko he notifies zer Watch. Und then, Commander?"

"And then I sound an alarm that summons Sergeant Dorfl and a heavy squad of his fellow golems. Some of them are on the Watch but others are Specials. Golems may not be terribly fast, even on their way to a fire, but they don't stop! According to the Vice-Chancellor's calculations they can be in Loko within fifty-two hours. Any rogue wizard with Sourcerer intentions will find himself attempting to fend off extremely strong, ferociously logical and totally fireproof Watchmen who are not subject to magical diseases. I think we have solved the problem, at least for the present."

"And we're openin' a Department of Lokotian Studies," the Archchancellor rumbled. "The Librarian has set up a readin' room for the Scrolls of Loko, fully warded and only open to designated senior students and their faculty advisors. That way we're always goin' t'be at least one step ahead of whatever mischief the blamed place can come up with. So far so good, Your Lordship?"

The Patrician steepled his fingers, smiled and nodded. "Satisfactory, Ladies and Gentlemen, most satisfactory!"