My Bartender Ch. 03

"I'm disappointed in you, Violet." My mother had a gift for ruining beautiful things. "Your father and I have slaved to give you every possible opportunity in life, and here you are throwing your life away on some..." She threw an arm out in Brian's direction with a sneer on her lip, "Some hoodlum."

"Mother, please," my voice was broken, and I couldn't bear to look up at her, let alone him. My world was quickly going up in flames, and I was standing there paralyzed.

"Don't 'please' me. You know exactly what you're doing. You're too old for this kind of rebellion."

Brian shifted, dislodging George, who was rubbing up against his leg. I knew what he was waiting for, but how could I challenge her on this? On anything? He didn't understand the dynamic between us, he didn't understand, but he would soon.

We'd woken up in a beautiful haze, and we'd made what felt like love and not sex. It scared and excited me. That had all crashed and burned the minute my mother knocked on the door to invite me to Sunday brunch. Now she was standing here, ruining everything like she always did.

"I can't tell you how disappointed I am right now," she sighed, and I heard the rattle of her earrings as she shook her head. "I expect more from you, Violet. You're going to have to explain yourself. This is why you broke up with Michael isn't it? And why things didn't work out with Andrew?"

"Mother," I tried again.

Across the room, George gave an unhappy mewl as Brian reached for his jacket. "I'm going to go," he said.

"Brian," I called out, glancing up for the first time. The look on his face caused a fist to clamp around my heart.

"I'm not done with you, Violet," my mother said. That was code for, 'don't you dare go after him.'

"Don't bother, Violet," the words were bitter, laced with disappointment, and I had no idea what to say. "I'd like to say it was a pleasure meeting you," he said to my mother. I almost laughed at that.

"Seriously, Violet, what the hell are you thinking?" She carried on for at least thirty minutes after he left, but I couldn't for the life of me remember what she said. Let's just say it revolved around me, throwing all my education away on a pathetic career that will get me nowhere. My slovenly appearance and ridiculous cartoon character fashion sense. Oh, yeah, let's not forget my soon to be drying up ovaries, and my sister with her successful lawyer husband, two kids, one dog and a white picket fence.

Basically, to sum it up in three words, I'm a disappointment.

Meanwhile, during her tirade, the only thing I could think about was Brian, and just how close we'd gotten to a real relationship. Maybe now he'd understand why I kept him at arm's length, maybe he wouldn't hate me. Maybe he would, maybe he'd never speak to me ever again. That thought made me sick to my stomach.

"You're coming with me and we're going to go and talk to your father. I'm tired of this." My mother turned around and shooed George away with an angry shake of her foot. For me it was the final straw.

"No." My voice wasn't strong but the word was said with finality.

"What did you say?" She turned back to give me the evil eye.

"I'm not going home to see dad and I'm not going to do this anymore."

"What on earth do you mean, 'you're not going to 'do this' anymore'?"

"I mean, I'm tired of this mom. I get it, you're unhappy with the choices I've made and the way I live my life and that's fine. I'm never going to be what you want me to be." I didn't wait for the response I could see brewing. "I love you mom, but you need to leave."

"You're not going after that man."

"Whatever I do it's none of your business."

"Your father will hear about this."

"God I hope so."

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The bar wasn't open, but the door was unlocked and that was all I needed. The first person I saw was the pixie-like bartender good old Charlie had a crush on. She took one look at me, smiled and pointed at the door marked 'employees only'.

Honestly, I had no idea if this was the right thing to do. If I was him, I'd never want to see me again. My mother had that effect on people, but whether it was the right thing or not I was here and there was no turning back

Brian's back was to me, so I got a good look at him. He wasn't as dolled up as he was the night before, but he still looked good enough to eat. His dark jeans accentuated all the parts I liked, and the t-shirt stretched across his wide shoulders made me think about hugging him...not sex with him, just hugging him.

"What do you want Vye?" He asked without turning around. His voice was bitter but not nasty. "I figured you and mommy dearest would be husband hunting at the country club tonight."

"I had no idea she'd be coming over," the words fell out in a rush. "I usually get warning."

"Enough warning to hide me in the closet?" He shook his head and turned to glare at me. "It all makes sense now. I'm the cheap fuck you use when you need to get your rocks off while you search for your white collar prince charming."

"Brian, please," I started but he cut me off.

"Go home Violet," He said my name with venom. "You don't belong here. Go find another idiot to fuck with."

What do I say to that? What could I say?

Brian went back to work and I stood in the doorway fighting for something to say. I felt lost, just like I did when I was dealing with mommy dearest. With her I was struggling to defend myself, where as with him I was trying to find a way to tell someone that I'd been pushing away for years, that I didn't want to let him go.

I gave up when he pushed past me and left the room. On my way out the door the pixie gave me a sad smile. She looked around then leaned on the bar to say, "His last name's Miller. Just in case you need to look up his number."

God, I wanted to kiss her.

It took me two days to work up the nerve to look him up, but I couldn't bring myself to call. So, I decided, in my infinite wisdom and as a glutton for punishment, that it would be best to just show up.

I made a point of going mid morning, late enough that I wouldn't be waking him, but early enough that he should still be home. Then I stood at the door for a few minutes before pushing the buzzer trying to tell myself it would be alright.

I half expected him to not even let me up, and was surprised when he just buzzed me in without even asking who it was. I was even more surprised to find his door propped open for me.

"That was fast," he said, coming into the main area in nothing but a pair of jeans, drying his hair with a towel.

He hadn't seen me yet, so I took a second to appreciate a body I couldn't seem to wipe from my mind. The fact that he was waiting for someone else was not lost on me. In fact it left me feeling stupid and foolish.

"I should probably go," I said.

Brian paused and slowly pulled the towel down, leaving his hair pointing out in all directions. "What are you doing here?"

Despite all my efforts, tears welled up in my eyes. "I don't know." My confession was so quiet he took a few steps closer. "I just thought...I couldn't just...I'm sorry she..." I let out a heavy sigh and pushed the book I had with me into his hands. "I wasn't using you. I wanted to be with you. I couldn't, I can't, stop thinking about you."

Not bothering to wait for him to open the book filled with all the drawings I'd done of him over the years, I turned and rushed out. I got as far as the lobby before the stairway door burst open and a fully dressed Brian pulled me into his arms.

I got one mind blowing kiss before he pulled back and asked, "What's in the book?"

"You didn't look at it?" I asked in wonder. "Why are you here? I thought you hated me."

Brian brushed my nose with the tip of his. "I can't hate you Beautiful," he said. "I've got too big a thing for you. I probably would have come to find you in a day or two. Now that I know where you live."

I wrapped my arms around his neck and gave him a kiss. "That makes me happy to hear."

A knock on the lobby door made us both look over. The woman standing on the other side looked too much like the man in my arms to be anything other than his mother. Unlike mine, she had a bright smile on her face and was carrying two grocery bags.

Brian looked down at me with a warm smile. "Guess it's time for you to meet my mom. Don't worry she doesn't bite."

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"I can't believe you drew this, "he said.

"I do it for a living," I said. "Went to school for it and everything."

"No," he said, holding up the book." I can't believe you drew this."

'This' was fairly accurate, if I say so myself, drawing of Brian lying buck naked in his bed, waiting for me. Complete with a semi accurate recreation of his tattoo's, his beautiful penis, with its slight curve and all, and that same 'come hither' stare he was giving me right now.

"What, "I said with a blush. "I think it's pretty good."

"Oh, it's good." Brian paused to look at it then raised heated eyes back up to me. "Do you really think I look like that?"

"I kinda think I didn't do you justice."

He gave a snort and went back to flipping through the book. I know exactly what he saw.

Brian sitting at the piano, playing Bohemian Rhapsody while I epically failed to sing along.

Him at the counter chopping vegetables while making omelettes.

Us dancing at the bar, after hours on Valentines day.

Him at the bar, dressed to kill, sliding a martini my way.

All the memories I wanted to capture forever. Five years of precious moments. I never wanted to forget.

From the bathroom I watched him in the mirror as he reached the end of the book.

In the last picture he was lying in bed, my bed, on his stomach. Arms under his head, hair scattered with a beautifully peaceful look on his face and George curled up in the small of his back. This time I'd gotten the tattoo's right.

Brian took a deep breath and looked over at me. "When did you draw this? After mom-zilla left?"

"No," I shook my head and gave him a hesitant smile. "I couldn't sleep and you apparently can sleep through anything.

"Come here Vye," he said. I followed his crooked finger all the way back to bed. "Thank you for sharing them with me."

The moment felt a little charged and all I could do was defuse it. With a shrug I said," you share your art with me, every time you step in the shower."

"I can't help singing in the shower," he gave me a wink. "The acoustics are great in there."

"Definitely," I said. Pulling down the sheet, I knelt on the bed exposing this delicious man inch by inch.

Brian grinned and rolled over on his back. He put both hands behind his head, the look in his eyes made me shiver. "God," he said, "you're beautiful."

A part of me glowed at the compliment, the other part of me, the one that still subscribed to my mother's views on beauty called him a liar. I'd just gotten out of the shower, my hair unbrushed, with only mascara on. I was a few steps up from 'a mess'.

"Shut up," I said. with an evil glint in my eye I pulled the sheet right off. "Lie still."

I started mid calf, with a feather light kiss for both. Every kiss was followed by a gentle nip and a grin as I made my way up to the slightly darker skin surrounding one of the parts of his body I loved the most.

I started by trailing my nose up against it, nuzzling that beautiful cock. I heard a sharply indrawn breath and smiled. Next I kissed the skin all around it pausing briefly to lick at the line between his cock and balls. Then my tongue slid up along the underside pausing at the head to look up at him.

His eyes were closed and there was a wistful smile on his face, I paused for a second to drink him in.

"What?" Brian asked, his eyes still closed.

My confession was easier when he wasn't looking at me. "I've got a thing for you, you know." He opened his eyes and to escape the intensity there I closed mine and slid down, taking his cock into my mouth.

I heard a hissing in drawn breath and then his hand came up and gently pulled back my hair. As I started moving, dancing along his length with my tongue, he slowly guided my head up and down.

"God, you're good at that." His voice was a whisper and I could have sworn his hand shook as he trailed fingers across my cheek. "I got a thing for you too baby. A big fucking thing."

He let me continue a little longer before he sucked in another hissing breath and pulled me up off of him. "I can't go on like that," he said. "There are too many things I want to do with you. Get up here and show me how much you love me."

With a smile I crawled up his body.