All Comments on 'My Black Sheep Ch. 01'

Too much wrong information ruined it...Dad is pathetic and mom enables it...no reason they treat the two daughters different....why would either stay at home...no with the big boobs and elite gymnast....no with a boob reduction..already in college....workout at home..she is an elite gymnast.....she doesn't know who wonder woman is?? Amelia isn't depressed if she hears voices....Dad takes her off her meds..come on....and she doesn't need him to get more....elite gymnast that doesn't shave?? 7 and left overnight tied up and no adult noticed? Why would she use her left hand to punch? One punch would not hurt like that let alone swell them up..then you end it with a schizophrenic sadist letting her go after telling a stay making it seem like the father has been abusive her?l

the sisters should just get away together. live happy together in bdsm.

Methinks the lady doth protest too much.

The story clearly explained why nobody noticed she was missing. Maybe try reading it before slamming it?

This story is very dark, but also interesting, and erotic, and arousing.

Your writing mechanics are strong, as usual. The prose is good. I caught a few punctuation errors, but nothing significant. I did notice some inconsistency in American/English spelling -- you used "humor", but also "discoloured" and "realised." But these are minor things. The writing is much stronger than what I usually see on Literotica, even from authors who are considered very good. You have a great sense of mixing up narrative and dialogue. The paragraphs are the right length. The use of *click" is a great device in this story.

I liked the way the nature of the relationship between the sisters unfolded as the story went along and as the eroticism of the encounter between them mounted. I enjoyed the story's darkness. You did a great job revealing Shelby's thoughts and feelings. That's a very tricky thing in this story because her feelings evolve so much over a very short time.

The one thing that gave me pause was Amelia's level of self-awareness and ability to articulate how she felt about her sister. If Shelby is in college and Amelia is her younger sister, and Amelia has mental heath problems, I'm not sure Amelia would be quite so articulate and quite so able to analyze everything she thought and felt about her sister as is described in the story. That aspect of the story stretched plausibility. I kept thinking, would two college-age sisters talk this way to each other? I don't think so, but it didn't bother me that much. It certainly did not prevent me from enjoying the story.

You handle the sex really well -- Shelby gradually being stripped of her clothes, the bondage, her anatomy, her orgasms, the pee flowing down her legs. I thought that was all very erotic.

Altogether, a very interesting, extremely dark, but also erotic story. I enjoyed it.

I don't agree with anon, but the whole situation was maybe too charged, what with the different treatment by the father, the incident, her mental issues, the medications thrown out. All of these things combined are too much to sound genuine.

Aside from that I found it very well written (as usual) and with a lot of potential for what may come next.

I couldn't stop reading it. Incest is not my thing AT ALL. But this kept my interest because it didn't feel like an incest story the whole way through. I found it a entertaining dark escape type of read. I'm curious to see where the both of you take the next chapter.

As a child of narcissist parents, I will assure any confused readers that this sort of behavior where they favor one child and scapegoat the other, oftentimes deliberately turning them against one another, is EXTREMELY common and very closely mirrors what my parents did to me and my sibling.

Too tense. Too much rapey nonconsent. I couldn’t make it through. Too much horror. I found it triggering. Y’know? You’re a good writer. This is a fine story. I rated it well. But I am too big of a wimp to finish this story.

There is a good story of resentment and redemption in here but it’s got too much other stuff in the way. The father is too much, the Mc is too much, Amelia is too much. Take the breast reduction point out, the bondage rape and the absolute naivety of the Mc out and you have a very compelling story. It’s written well but it’s so over the top that it’s no longer pleasurable to read. It reads like you’re trying to make the reader complicit to the act and that’s not something that you pull off, because it doesn’t have any element of macabre curiosity. This is torture porn and none of the characters are redeemable in any way. Again, we’ll written and the characters are airtight villains but nothing else

Man, I love the psychological stuff. Keep it up.

Brilliant. And aaawwwful. Just awful.

So. As twisted as she was I was enchanted by Amelia. And I loved the fairytale. I thought it was pure genius. And when I got to the line

“The monster told her that this was what she deserved, and I believed him.“

I had that same feeling when reading that one Stephen King book as an impressionable teenager, the one where the woman kidnaps the author, and there’s the scene where she breaks both his ankles and it’s like NO NO NO THIS WILL NEVER END HE’S NEVER GETTING OUT OF THERE ALIVE. It’s gotta be bad (or good? I don’t even know anymore) when I’m reduced to thinking “this can’t end up in her dying because there can’t be snuff stories in this site right?”

Up until that I was actually enjoying the story, albeit horrified, but after that it was just one big NOOOOOOOOO all the way to the end. But it’s beyond me to understand what there is to get off on in something like this, so maybe that’s exactly what’s one big YEEESSS to someone else.

(And yes I noticed the warning. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I keep getting burned and I keep coming back to your stories like a moth drawn to the light. Maybe I’ve tapped into some hitherto unknown masochistic tendency within myself.)

I mean, like, with a beginning, middle and end, characters and character development, plot, stakes, dramatic tension... a rare find based on the admittedly short amount of time I've spent wandering through this site's catalog.

I got on to your member name after reading your critical reviews of others' works on the forums, and your reviews are so great I had to follow up and see how all your editorial insight was being applied to your own stories. You're my first favorite author.

I find the category choice interesting on this one. Choosing a category for crossover stories like this seems like a real challenge, one I've already come up against with my first submission to the site (still pending as of this writing). I feel like "non-consent" gives a better flavour of what we're about to read vs "incest," or maybe even "fetish" (for the bondage). But I kind of get it - the moment where Amelia tells Shelby that she was hoping Shelby's biggest turn-on was going to be that it was her sister doing all this to her - that goes a long way toward firming up the incest category.

One aspect of this makes me slightly uncomfortable, and that's the connection between mental health and BDSM. This reads a bit like mental health problems = sexual deviance, and "normal" mental health = conservative, inexperienced, traditional, vanilla, innocent.

A great read, thank you. On to the next...

Undoubtedly, one of the best

Been reading stories on her for a few years. And other than the author BiscuitHammer; this is absolutely one of the best stories I've read. A more intellectual feel as opposed to the big pecs, big dick ,big tits stories that are mostly on here. And in my favorite genre too. Thank you AwkwardMD. Hope to read more from you.

Stunning in all aspects.