My Cousin Shows Me Around Campus

The guys took turns throwing frisbees, all of them throwing theirs an amazing distance. When it was my turn, my throw wobbled a short distance before hooking away from where I intended it to go. The guys took turns trying to teach me how to throw a frisbee. I was throwing better, but nowhere close to as good as they could throw. I eventually gave up and focused on talking to the guys as they played.

Jeremy asked me, "Would you like some iced tea?" He reached down into his cart and pulled out a bottle of amber liquid.

Skipper said, "It's beer."

"No, it's not. It's ale."

Skipper rolled his eyes. "I don't want my cousin getting busted for drinking in public before she even attends her first class."

"Okay. Cool. Megan, would you like some water instead?"

As we wandered around the campus, the three guys told me stories of going to classes. A recurring story was going to class when it was sunny and then when class was over, having to run through pouring rain. We went into one giant lecture hall and they told me stories of bored or sleepy students doing stupid things.

Carlos said, "During another boring lecture in History class, this student suddenly jumped up and yelled, 'Woohoo!'" Carlos had pumped his fist in the air as he yelled Woohoo! "Apparently, he had defeated some difficult boss in the game he was playing on his phone. The professor stopped lecturing and everyone in the lecture hall stared at the guy. He finally said, 'Sorry' and sat down. We all cracked up. For the rest of that course, it was a meme for someone to stand up and yell 'Woohoo!'"

As we walked, I couldn't help comparing Skipper to Jeremy and Carlos. They were the same age, about the same height and body shape. Skipper had been thin in high school but had filled out nicely in college. All had faces that were nice to look at, but Skipper was the only one I'd consider handsome. Jeremy had long hair in a ponytail and a scraggly beard. I didn't like the look. Carlos' hair was short and spiky, which looked okay on him. Skipper had a simple hairstyle but it suited him so well that it made him look like a male model. Skipper walked with such a confident, graceful air. He was comfortable with who he was and what he did. That comfort made everything he did seem right. If he had offered ale to Jeremy's or Carlos' younger female cousin, he would have known how to do it so everyone would have thought it was a great idea.

When we got to the building where the Economics classes were taught, Jeremy told this story about Skipper. "Last semester, the three of us had an Economics class taught by the Dean of the Social Sciences College. One day, the Dean is late. At ten minutes, Paul stands up and says, 'We should write our names on the whiteboard and leave.' No one moves. He sits back down." Carlos is smiling. Skipper looks embarrassed. "Five minutes later, Paul walks up to the front of the class and writes 'We were present' on the whiteboard, draws a line underneath that, and then writes his name. As soon as he finishes writing his name, the Dean walks in."

Carlos was laughing. Skipper was looking up and silently whistling.

Jeremy said with wonder in his voice, "You've never seen anyone erase a whiteboard and sit down so fast."

Carlos said amid laughter, "He was a blur."

Jeremy added, "He was like The Flash."

Skipper rolled his eyes before chuckling as his friends laughed at his expense.

We continued on. Eventually, the stories were replaced by an argument over the minimum wage. Carlos believed that the US should raise the minimum wage significantly each year until it was $15 per hour. Jeremy argued that there should be no minimum wage. I got the impression he didn't really believe that but was saying it to yank Carlos' chain. Skipper avoided saying what he thought the minimum wage should be and instead knocked holes in the arguments made by the other two. Nobody took the argument too seriously and there was a lot of cutting up and name-calling as they argued. I didn't follow everything they discussed, but I understood the gist.

Then we were at the dorms. Jeremy had won the frisbee golf game. Skipper and I said goodbye and headed to the Skippermobile.

I asked Skipper, "Why did you get an apartment instead of staying in the dorms?"

"After two years of struggling to get alone time with girlfriends, I was ready to move out." We had arrived at the car. Before he opened the door, Skipper said, "Dorms are a great place for making friends. I didn't know a soul when I arrived here and a lot of my friends now are people I met in the dorms my freshman year. You definitely want to be in the dorms your freshman year."

Once I climbed across and sat down in the passenger seat, I said, "I'm not so sure for me."

Skipper looked at me. When I said nothing, he started the car and drove off. He said, "We're heading over to the apartment of the guys who were my roommate and suitemate sophomore year. We'll have dinner with them."

I didn't say anything. Instead, I thought about what I had seen so far and where I thought I fit in. Finally, I asked Skipper, "Do you like me calling you 'Skipper' or would you prefer I call you 'Paul'?"

"I like it when you call me 'Skipper'. It reminds me of birthday parties, playing with sparklers on the Fourth of July, and arguing on the porch swing at a lake house during summer vacations." My heart swelled. "I hate it when Lauren calls me 'Skipper'. She does it to annoy me and though it doesn't annoy me, it annoys me that she wants to annoy me. The rest of the family, I don't care. If I had been home last summer, I probably would have told everyone to call me 'Paul'."

"But you weren't home last summer."

Skipper shrugged. "Changing majors set me back. I had to take summer classes to get back on schedule to graduate on time. Taking summer classes was another reason for getting an apartment as they don't have dorms during the summer. I've got a couple more classes to take this summer so that I'll graduate on time."

I thought about birthday parties, playing with sparklers on the Fourth of July, and arguing on the porch swing at the lake house during summer vacations. I thought about how much I enjoyed hanging out with Skipper. "Do you know I used to have a huge crush on you?"

Skipper chuckled. "Of course. It was pretty obvious. Mom and Dad used to tease me about it when I was alone with them while making it clear that I was never to take advantage of your crush." Skipper had sounded uncomfortable saying the last sentence. "What have you been reading? Besides paranormal romances?"

"Nothing. I haven't felt interested in reading anything else."

Before Skipper had gone off to college, I had read mainly nonfiction with an occasional paranormal romance. More ammo for arguing with Skipper. Once he left, the arguments had stopped, and reading nonfiction had seemed pointless. I had read more than before he had left, but it was always about sexy vampires, demons, angels, shapeshifters, and time travelers. I barely read what I was assigned in school as I could get A's without doing so and I found most of the school readings boring. High school in general was boring. Every day, I couldn't wait to go home. I was hoping college would be so much better.

Skipper looked at me with a twinkle in his eyes. "By the way, should egg rolls be considered Chinese food?"

Skipper had tossed me a hand grenade. The obvious answer was "Yes". But he knew something that would tear the obvious answer apart. I had my phone and I could search for details about egg rolls, but by our rules that'd be cheating. If I asked in the right way, Skipper would tell me the facts that he felt weren't common knowledge.

Why would a food be considered Chinese food? Because it was invented in China. Were egg rolls invented somewhere besides China? Where would they be invented? Someplace in the US. Someplace with a large Chinese population. I felt so out of practice. I should be snapping these thoughts together in no time and now it was a slog.

I asked, "Was the egg roll invented in San Francisco?"

"New York. In the thirties by a chef named Henry Low."

Lo was a common Chinese last name. "Was he of Chinese descent?"

"His last name was spelled L-O-W. The articles I found didn't mention his ethnicity. Could be an Anglicized version of the Chinese name, but most likely someone of English descent."

Okay, why would a food invented in New York by someone who wasn't of Chinese descent be considered Chinese food? I was drawing a blank. Skipper would have had two or three arguments thought of by this point.

Finally, I came up with, "It's considered Chinese food because it's made of materials that other Chinese dishes use and is prepared like other Chinese dishes."

"Agree with the materials. They're like spring rolls except for a different wrapper material. But egg rolls are deep-fat-fried like French fries. That's why I looked up the history of egg rolls in the first place."

I had foolishly made an assumption about Chinese cooking methods when I didn't know anything about them. And I got burned. Why else would egg rolls be considered Chinese food? I thought for a while but came up with nothing.

Skipper bailed me out with, "Even if the person who invented the egg roll wasn't Chinese, it was Chinese restaurants that embraced the egg roll and popularized it. Without them, the egg roll would have been just another recipe published in a random cookbook."

I tried to think of something to add, but couldn't keep up with something. I was disappointed in myself. But I had been so disappointed in myself the last two years.

Skipper asked, "Why do you want advice on how to be happy and successful at college? What's going on?"

I sighed. "I wish I knew. I feel like I've drifted through the last two years. I haven't been able to motivate myself to study like I should. My grades have been good, but not as good as they could be. I barely made it into the university when I should have easily made it. Mom and Dad have talked to me about my study habits. They've tried different ways to motivate me. Nothing's worked. I just keep on drifting."

"You need to stop drifting. The big thing about college is that you're on your own. Mom and Dad aren't here to make sure you get up in time to make it to class. Or to stop you from skipping class. No one will tell you to start your homework when you should. Lots and lots of kids do poorly not because they're aren't smart enough but because they don't have enough self-motivation."

I put my hand on Skipper's arm. "Skipper, will you help me keep focused on school? Talk to me regularly about my classes? I think if I know you're going to ask me about my classes, it'll give me the push to stay on top of them."

Skipper reached over and squeezed my hand. "I'll do whatever I can to help." He released my hand. "Okay. I understand now why you wanted advice on how to be successful. Why advice on how to be happy?"

"Are you happy, Skipper?"

"At this moment? Or in general?"

"In general."

"I go through ups and downs. Three weeks ago, I broke up with the girl I dated most of the school year. Freja is a Danish girl who's in a couple of my classes. It was fun dating someone from another country. We had some of the most interesting arguments I've ever had. But we had trouble not getting angry about our arguments. One day, an argument turned ugly and we broke up. So I'm a little down right now, but generally, I think I'm very happy."

"Are you happy because you're doing well in school or because you have a lot of friends or because you've had a happy love life?"

"I don't know if you can separate the three. When I'm doing well in school, I have a positive attitude that makes it easy to have fun with my friends. And when I'm having fun with my friends, it's easy to have a happy love life. And the right girlfriend makes everything better."

I nodded. "I think my disappointment with how I'm doing academically has grown to be disappointed with life in general. When I'm with my friends, I have an okay-but-not-great time. I had a boyfriend and he was okay but not great. I'm hoping that if I can get back on track academically, I'll get back on track socially."

"Sounds like a plan." Skipper pulled into a parking spot. "Here we are."

We were in the same apartment complex as Skipper's but in a different section. As we got out of the car, I asked, "Where do you stand on the minimum wage?"

Skipper laughed. "We should definitely raise the minimum wage. My views are very similar to Carlos'. Difference here and there, but fairly close."

"Why didn't you agree with him?"

"Because when you start agreeing, you stop thinking."

We climbed the stairs to the second floor. Skipper knocked on a door and then opened it. He called, "Hey everyone!"

The apartment was a two-bedroom similar to Skipper's. Four people came to the door to greet us.

Skipper said, "Megan, this is Cole, who was my roommate last year. And his girlfriend, Kelsey. This is Zak, who was my suitemate. And his girlfriend, Tien. All four of them live here." I shook their hands as Skipper introduced them.

Skipper asked, "Ready to order pizza?"

The next few minutes were spent hashing out a pizza order then once it was placed, we all sat down around a beat-up dining room table.

Zak said to me, "It's thanks to Paul that I'm living with Tien and Cole is living with Kelsey."

Cole added, "Paul and his girlfriend, Jordan. I told them there was a girl in the dorm that I really wanted to get to know better. We'd always say 'Hi!' to each other and chat for a few moments, but I couldn't ever get the conversation to last long enough so I'd feel comfortable asking where she lived or sitting with her when she was eating with her friends."

Kelsey said, "Cole pointed me out to Paul one day. And because I'm tall, Paul came up with the idea of having Jordan ask me to join a co-ed recreational intramural volleyball team with her, Paul, Cole, and Zak. I said I'd join if my roommate Tien could join too."

Tien said, "And that was how I met Zak. We had a lot of fun playing volleyball together and we had a lot of fun hanging out together after the games. Cole quickly paired up with Kelsey. After the last game, Zak asked me out. And we've been friends and couples ever since."

Skipper said, "Sadly, the volleyball was the beginning of the end for Jordan and me. She had played on her high school volleyball team. None of us had. We were playing for fun and didn't care if we won or lost. Jordan hated losing. She took her frustrations with the team out on me and three weeks after the season ended, she and I broke up."

Kelsey said, "And how many weeks did it take you to find another girlfriend? Four? And I liked Diane a lot more than Jordan."

Skipper shrugged. We talked for a while, then the pizza came. After pizza, the guys played a video game together. Tien, Kelsey, and I repaired to the kitchen where it was quieter. I was much more comfortable with the smaller group. I told them about my day and asked them for advice on how to be happy and successful in the dorms.

Tien said, "Having a great roommate makes living in the dorms a lot better." She gave Kelsey an appreciative look and Kelsey smiled. "But the main thing is to keep an open mind and take advantage of the opportunities to have fun that come along. I never would have looked to join a coed volleyball team but I'm so glad I did."

I hadn't heard of the name "Tien" before. I asked, "Tien, that's..."

"Vietnamese. My parents were born in Vietnam."

Skipper had come into the kitchen at this point. "And I've learned to love Vietnamese food. But as much as we all love Vietnamese food, I've been sent here to pop popcorn."

Tien and Kelsey continued giving me advice. Kelsey said, "If you ever move in with a guy, decide beforehand what would be an equitable way of dividing the household chores. Don't discover once you're moved in that he doesn't want to do any cleaning. You may need to adjust your plan once you learn what each of you likes to do around the house, but adjusting is a lot easier than starting from scratch."

Tien said, "Believe it or not - Paul is great at cleaning bathrooms. He hates to cook. He comes over here every week and cleans both bathrooms, then stays for a home-cooked dinner."

We went into the living room, the guys stopped playing the video game and the six of us played Cards Against Humanity. It was a lot of fun. There'd be a black card that had a statement with a blank in it. Each of us had white cards that provided possible phrases to fill in the blank. We'd give the person who played the black card one of our white cards and he or she would pick the white card that was the funniest answer. The cards were a bit raunchy, but that was part of what made the game fun. One combination was "I'm sorry, Professor, but I couldn't complete the homework because of a homoerotic volleyball montage." Everyone but me laughed until they cried on that one.

When it was nine, Skipper announced it was time for us to go. When we were in the car, I said, "They were nice. Do you think both couples will get married?"

"Zak and Tien, yes. They've discussed marriage already. They're going to hold off until they've both been working for a while, but I think it's a matter of when and not if."

"But Cole and Kelsey?"

"They're close to breaking up. If they weren't living together, they probably would have broken up by now. It's gotten to the point that Zak talked to me a few days ago about if Cole and Kelsey break up, would I move in with them and have Cole take over my place? My roommate has agreed."

"Where would you sleep?"

"On the couch. Kelsey has all her stuff in the bedroom so no point in moving her stuff out. Their lease is up end of May. Zak and Tien are going to get their own place. Living with another couple saves them a lot of money, but it puts too much stress on their relationship."

"When is your lease up?"

"End of May as well. I'll lease another two-bedroom and find a new roommate. My current roommate is graduating in May and then moving closer to his new job."

In a distant part of my mind, a plan started coming together.

I said, "Oh! I forgot to tell you - I got an email from my roommate for the fall. Her name is Ashlynne Chevrolet."

"Chevrolet is her last name? Really?"

"Really. She's a pre-med major. She's going to be doing a lot of studying and wants the room quiet when she studies. And she wants us to keep the room neat. She sounded very bossy."

Skipper shrugged it off. "She sounds smart and serious. You'll get along fine." Skipper grinned. "Did her parents get put into a witness protection plan and the person picking their new last name struggled with coming up with yet another name? Or is she related to a Corvette?"

"She could be related to a Chevrolet..."

"She could?" Skipper pounced on my statement. "I had always assumed because cheval is French for horse that Chevrolet was a made-up name meant to give the impression of a French iron horse. But it's not, is it? Was the founder named Chevrolet?"

"He was a co-founder."

Skipper shrugged. "Okay."

I had phrased it wrong. I had phrased it like I would if I was telling my parents or my friends. I had made it too easy for Skipper to guess. Again, out of practice.

One of the things I was most proud of was when I asked Skipper, "The flag that inspired The Star-Spangled Banner and is in the Smithsonian, was it flown over Fort McHenry during the Battle for Baltimore?" He had spent days singing "the rocket's red glare" until he figured out the national anthem describes two flags. Stumping him had made my US History class worthwhile.

Skipper had me call Allie to tell her we were close to the dorms. When we arrived at the dorm entrance, she came out. Her hair on top was pulled back while her hair on the side continued to tumble down. She was wearing an ivory sleeveless crop top and loose black cotton pants. Six to eight inches of her midriff were exposed and she obviously worked out regularly. She was wearing shoes - black wedge heels - and a lot more make-up. She looked very sexy. She looked to me like she was dressed to score and I suspected who she wanted to score with.