All Comments on 'My First Time'

I enjoyed your erotica but if you want to be a real writer, try slipping some mystery into your characters to make me curious and beg for more clues.

I appreciate the critique and will try to refine my stories, I'm new to all this so I appreciate the comment.

Stories are always more interesting if the characters are three dimensional. In this story we get the sex, but no feeling about who these people are, and why - other than they get laid - we should be the slightest bit interested in either of them.

I disagree with Morant. The character development evolved through their interaction. We got a sense of who they were and their relationship as the piece progressed. What I particularly liked was the caring and tenderness between the characters. There was a sense of reality that I was easily able to relate to. Often stories of this type are crass. Well done.