My Graduate School Romance - Lindsey's Perspective

I stole a kiss, "I like having you in the band."

He had my amp, "You just love me for my body."

"I do, but I love what you bring musically too. I need to get you over to my house on a non-rehearsal day."

"So we can make music?"

I winked, "That and a lot more. Or another idea, maybe after rehearsal you leave and then come back after everyone's gone to give Elena the slip."

When we got inside, Elly had a new set-up. Pete in back and the four of us in a semi-circle. I was on a wing so I could see everyone.

Once everyone was set up we did a quick sound check. I looked around to see what everyone else was wearing. The guys just wore tight jeans and t-shirts. I really liked the view of Sean's ass. Elena wore skin tight jeans and a form fitting Nirvana t-shirt. She must have worn the thinnest bra ever invented because she was all nips. Katie's outfit looked like she was playing with the Go-Go's. Her tits would be bouncing tonight and the boys would be happy.

When we started our first set, there were maybe fifteen people in the bar. By the time we got to the fourth song, the place was packed. I saw the woman Sean rescued last week, Astrid. She was with a tall blonde.

At first no one was dancing. All that changed when Elly turned over the singing to Sean.

He started in on Brown Eyed Girl and within seconds people started flooding to the dance floor. He sang the three pieces that were scheduled for him. Things felt so good.

During both of the breaks I had a nice dose of Pete fucking me.

During our second break, I ran into Sam, one of my regular johns, "How's my favorite cunt?"

Ouch! Why did that hurt so much? "Doing good Sam. Wanna have a go after the gig?"

"With my favorite piece of ass, absolutely. Regular price?"

I'm just a piece of meat to him. "What do you want? A fuck or a suck?"

He reached up and pinched my nipple, "Just a suck sweet cheeks."

"Great. I'll meet you out in the parking lot once I pack up."

After the last set, I quickly packed up my shit. Rich the bouncer helped me lug it to my car. I looked around and Sam was leaning against a tree.

I walked over to him and he handed me a wad of bills. I didn't count. No way would he stiff me. He grabbed me and started kissing me.

He was groping my tits, pulling on my nipples, "Let me see 'em."

I pulled my tube top down and he grabbed both nipples and twisted.

"Fuck!" I slapped his hands away. "That hurt you fucker!"

"I paid my money."

"But they're my tits. Treat them with respect."

"You're a fucking slut. Fuck respect. On your knees bitch."

Sam always treated me like shit, but why did it hurt so much tonight? I dropped to my knees and unbuckled his fly. Sam has a decent sized cock and it was almost hard. I started working him. A car stopped and had us in its headlights. Whoever was driving was watching me give head. Fuck you! I flipped them off and the car moved on.

I started deep throating him and he pushed my head onto his cock. Sam grabbed the sides of my head and began fucking my face. I looked up and he had a sneer on his face. He was getting off treating me like shit.

Several times I had to push him off as I couldn't breathe. What the fuck?

Finally, he shot his cum in my mouth, "Swallow it bitch!"

Of course I had to swallow it. Every john expected me to swallow. By now I was immune to the taste of cum. I used to love it. Now it was just part of the job. Sam zipped up and walked off, leaving me kneeling there on the wet grass. I felt like a piece of trash he'd tossed out the window. I still craved an orgasm. I went back to my car, reclined the seat, and rubbed one out.

*****

Driving home the tears started. As I thought about my life, waves of sadness and despair washed over me. You're never going to have a quality guy Lindsey. A guy like Sean. He may not know you're a whore, but he knows you put out. You're never going to have a family Lindsey. No babies. You have a nice house, but no one to share it with. You're just a cunt for guys like Sam to fuck.

When I woke up the next day I resolved that I had to check myself into the addiction center. I made a phone call and the lady said I could come in on Monday. Fuck! I need to check in today!

I resolved to never turn another trick. I was tired of being treated like shit. But I needed to fuck! Who I could fuck? Keith. I sent him a text and he showed up around one. I told him I really need an orgasm and he obliged with an extended fucking.

*****

I still had the band. For some reason I decided not to hit on Sean. I just gave him a hug when he showed up on Sunday evening for rehearsal.

Pete was always open for some pussy. I whispered in his ear, "Come by after practice."

When we were just about ready, Elena said, "Halloween is next Friday. We should probably come up with some costumes for Thursday night. Let's try to be a little classy. Also, I'm getting rid of the no romance rule."

What the fuck! "Are you fucking kidding me?"

"No, I'm serious."

I threw my water bottle and stormed off into the house. What a cunt! I'm going to go into treatment and now she gets rid of the rule. I could have been fucking Sean for the past two weeks. FUCK!

I calmed my ass down and returned to the garage. They had been discussing something, I wasn't sure what.

Elena said, "Lindsey, you should play for them."

"No thanks."

"I'm serious. Play Bach for them."

Pete said, "That's really fucking old."

Elena smiled warmly at me, "Play Jesu Lindsey's way. Please?"

Elly is lucky she's my friend. I pushed the church organ setting and glared at my bandmates. I played Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring as fast as I've ever played it. Sean seemed to get it. He was nodding appreciatively. Elena was grinning. Katie's eyes were popping out. Pete's jaw was on the ground.

When I finished, Pete shook his head, "Holy fuck!"

Katie asked, "How'd you learn to play like that?"

"Julliard."

Sean looked shocked, "You went to Julliard?"

"Only for a year. Then I found out it's hard making a living playing classical music."

Sean said, "Can we use your computer for a moment, I want to look up something and play it for you."

"Sure."

We went in and I turned on my computer. Of course, I hadn't closed out my last porn site. How fucking embarrassing. I laughed, "We don't want that."

Sean pulled up a video from the Seventies - Apollo 100 - Joy. He said, "I think we can do this."

It was a fast version of Bach with a backing band. I looked around and everyone was nodding.

When it finished Elena said, "Lindsey, for the record, you're better than them. Sean, you can do that guitar part. Pete, drumming's not too hard."

Pete nodded, "Got it.'

"Katie, bass is easy." Elena said, "I'll bring in my keyboard tomorrow and I'll try and figure out the little extras. Okay! What else could we do?"

Little did they know that that plan was all for shit. Sean brought up several instrumental pieces that were all guitar based. They were making plans, but I wasn't paying attention. I was already pulling away.

Elena nodded, "Which brings up another point, we need to spread out the singing more. Sean, I'm looking at you, but Katie and Lindsey I would love for both of you to sing more.

Yeah, sure. Good thing I don't need to think very much when I'm playing. My mind was off in la-la-land.

Katie said, "I got one I can bring tomorrow."

We only rehearsed for two hours or so. When we were done, I just walked into the house.

Pete showed up twenty minutes later and fucked me nicely. He was such a nice kid and he always treated me with respect. He gave me two very nice orgasms.

*****

The next morning I woke up and my period had started. How fucking appropriate! I called Elly and told her my plan.

She was very cool, "I'll drive you down."

"I was going to ask Sean to be my last fuck. Could you come over around three?"

"Whatever you need me to do."

"Thanks Elly. I knew you'd help."

I sent Sean a text: Can we talk?

Almost immediately my phone rang. What a quality guy.

"Hi Lindsey, what's up?"

"Are you doing anything for lunch?"

"I am. I'm eating lunch with Katie in the college cafeteria."

"How about this afternoon? Are you free?"

He hesitated for a moment.

Talk to him girl! "This isn't about sex. Well, it could be about sex if you wanted it to be. I just wanted to meet with you."

"Is everything alright?"

"Well, kind of. Sort of." Be honest for once. "Not really."

"How about one o'clock?"

"That'd be great. Can we meet at my house, or would you prefer someplace else?"

"Your house is fine."

"Great see you then."

*****

I ate lunch and stripped off my clothes. I put in my butt plug to prepare for him. I decided I'd take him up my ass. I put on a robe to be decent. Sean arrived a little before one. I was so grateful. He really was a class act. I said I needed him and here he was.

I put my arms around his neck and gave him a gentle kiss, "Thanks for coming. Can I get you anything?"

"Maybe some water."

I took his hand and led him to the kitchen. I pointed to the table and got him a glass of water. I sat down across from him and took his hand.

I looked into his eyes. What kind eyes. "Sean, I am going to be completely straight with you."

"I appreciate that."

"I don't understand exactly why I'm having this conversation. Well, I do. This is going to sound very confusing. My head is a little fucked up, but not from booze or drugs. I don't understand a lot of what goes on in my head, but I feel like I need to tell you this and ask you this." Shit here goes. I took a deep breath, "I'm a whore."

Sean smiled, "Well, you've always joked ..."

Fuck! He thinks I'm kidding! I cut him off. "No. I'm serious. I'm actually a whore. Let me explain." My heart was racing. Calm down. "I've told you I'm addicted to sex." He nodded. "I guess it started when I was in college. I started having sex and I couldn't get enough. I'm thirty so that was ten years ago. Except for one week when I tried to stop, there hasn't been a day when I haven't had some guy's dick in one of my holes. I actively go find guys to fuck. I often have sex three and four times a day. My personal record is fucking and sucking nearly two dozen guys in a day. I lost count. That same day I had three guys make me airtight. Most times I'm treated like shit, like a cum bucket. At times I'd rather fuck than eat. I have a serious problem."

Keep going Lindsey. "One of the reasons I moved here was because where I lived before, everyone knew I was a whore, the town whore. The police chief and I had an arrangement where I would fuck his lights out and he'd let me turn quality tricks. I was making great money turning tricks, but I wanted a new start not being a slut.

"I tried. I was able to go without a good fuck for about a week. Then I was back to my old ways. When I got here I was playing piano downtown - that's where I met Elena - and I was meeting and fucking guys left and right. I was making some great money. There for a while I spent more time turning tricks than I was playing the piano. I was making far better money than I did at the bank. Then this past January I got busted in a prostitution sting. My lawyer got me off so I don't have a conviction on my record, just an arrest. In the back of my mind, I know that one of these days the bank is going to find out."

Shit, he's not going to want to touch you. "Oh, also just so you know, I go down to Planned Parenthood and get tested for STDs three times a week. I just had a negative test this morning."

Sean had a glazed look in his eye, like I just told him there was no Santa Claus.

Keep going Lindsey. "I have no idea why I'm telling you this." Don't lie bitch! "That's not true. Actually, I do know."

Tell him the dream. "I ..." My throat was dry. I swallowed, "I don't want to live like this anymore. I need to get some help." I felt a tear roll down my cheek. Fuck it. "Elly's been trying to get me into an addiction treatment program. I've been resisting. For a while after I got busted, I was just fucking my johns for free. I figured I'm not a whore if I'm not being paid, right? Then I decided I would go back to charging and save money for treatment. I've been saving money for about five months now."

Just crawl under a rock. You'd be less embarrassed. I looked up into his eyes, "Sean, I can't promise you anything, but I really want to be your friend. The only friend I have is Elly. You'd think with all this fucking I wouldn't be lonely. I'm terribly lonely. I want a normal life. I want a family. I want friends that give a shit about me."

Ask him. He's a quality guy. I reached out and grabbed his hand, "This is going to sound really weird, but I'd like to have sex one last time, hopefully with you, and then I'd like for you and Elly to take me to the addiction treatment facility in Springfield. They're expecting me." Fuck! Why does this hurt so fucking much! "What do you think?"

Sean nodded.

Lay the whole thing out for him. "Also, so you know, I'm on the rag right now. I was thinking we'd have some anal. When I was first fucked up the ass, I didn't like it, but now I love anal. You can wear a condom if you need to. I've asked Elly to come over at three. We have about an hour and a half for sex, plus clean up. A half hour there, a half hour helping me check in, and a half hour back. You'll be back in plenty of time for rehearsal."

"So, you won't be playing with us for a while."

Of course. He's worried about the band. I shook my head, "They say the initial part is six weeks, give or take. My health insurance is paying for part of it. Like I said, I've saved a bunch of money from turning tricks."

I squeezed his hand, "Sean, I can't call it making love. I've never made love in my life. Can we have caring sex? Can we do that? God this feels weird. Like this is some kind of mercy fuck."

Sean opened his mouth to speak, but I raised my hand, "I've always dreamed about having a real relationship. One that was based on mutual love and respect. You and I don't have that, but ..." GOD THIS HURTS SO MUCH! "Shit. I don't know what I want to say." I just hung my head.

I looked up into those kind eyes, "I know you don't love me, but you're a quality guy. Maybe you might care about me and not treat me like a piece of meat to be fucked and thrown away. Not treat me like a human toilet."

"Lindsey, I do care about you."

I looked at the clock. Plenty of time, "Perhaps we can go to my bedroom."

I stood and took his hand. I started toward the bedroom, but Sean pulled me back. He wrapped me up in a bear hug and just held me tight. This is why you're doing this. What a quality guy! Oh god I'm such a loser! The sobs started and I couldn't control them. My body was shaking. Oh this hurts!

Sean kissed my forehead, "Thank you for trusting me with all of that. I do care about you. I'm so proud of your courage."

I nodded, but held on tight. What a sweet man. Someday Lindsey you'll find someone like this.

Time is wasting. I took his hand and led him to my room. I threw my robe in the corner. I turned and quickly stripped off his clothes. He had a nice sized cock. Not too big. Not too small. A Goldilocks cock! Gorgeous red pubes. Not exactly tidy, but who cares. Remember when you had pubes? Someday.

I looked up into those eyes. "I have beautiful red pubes. One little reason I'd like to get the treatment is that I used to love my fire bush. The doctor at the clinic recommended I shave it off to avoid stuff like crabs."

I put my arms around his neck, "Sean?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

Time to get to work. Shit Lindsey! Sex shouldn't be work. You've got to stop thinking like that. I dropped to my knees and started working that handsome cock. Suck. Lick. Suck. Lick. Stroke. Stroke. Stroke. Down the hatch! I easily took him into my throat. What a cool feeling! I control this man! Blow jobs are empowering.

"Lindsey." I looked up at him. "Let's move over to the bed and I can show you what happens when someone cares about you."

Time for fucking. Sean laid back on the bed. What's he doing? He held his hand out to me. Before I joined him I grabbed a tube of lube and a box of Kleenex and set it next to the pillow. I knelt down next to him.

He smiled at me, "No, you're on top."

I threw my leg over him and straddled his waist.

He cupped my ass, "You would like to have the kind of sex where I care about you, right?" I nodded. "I want to see you. I want to be able to kiss you. I'm going to lie here and you are going to be in charge."

Okay. Not a problem. I nodded again. I reached for the lube, but Sean stopped me. He held my face and gently kissed me. I closed my eyes. It felt like electricity shot through me. Oh god, he cares. I gently probed back with my tongue. I felt cherished with his hands on my face. This is how it should be. Remember this.

After several heavenly minutes I eased off and spoke into his mouth, "Let's get started."

I grabbed a tissue, raised up on one knee, and pulled the butt plug out. I wrapped it in the tissue and set it aside. I spread lube on his cock then placed him at my asshole. I slowly lowered myself onto him. I'm in fucking control! How cool is this?

I smiled down at Sean, "I've never done it this way. Face-to-face, I mean. The guy has always been behind me, fucking away."

I placed his hands on my tits. He started rolling my nipples, sending sparks down my spine. Savor this. Go slow. I deliberately moved my hips up and down feeling that delicious stretch increasing as more and more cock went up my ass.

When I bottomed out, I leaned forward and gently kissed Sean, "Thank you. This is so nice."

I began to lose my balance so I placed my hands on his chest. Sean's hands moved to my ass, not to do anything but hold it. Savor it. I slowly fucked him, moving up and down on his cock. Going slowly, I could feel when the head of his cock hit my asshole. Oh, how nice. I started moving back and forth so that my clit got some action. It felt like I was pulling on him with my ass. The sensations driving up my spine were so nice. I realized I had my head back and my eyes closed, treasuring this moment. Back and forth, up and down. The luscious feeling of being filled with a hard cock. My body was tingling with pleasure. Without realizing it, I increased my speed. I reached down and started rubbing my clit. I almost melted in that moment. Fuck him with everything you've got girl! I placed my feet on either side of his torso so I could do squats on his cock.

I looked down at him, "Oh god Sean."

The sweet euphoria of an orgasm flowed up through me. Pure pleasure spread up through my body. That rush that I craved. Pulses shot from my ass. Pulses shot from my clit. Warmth enveloped me as my body was sated. The precious release that sent my mind drifting in a natural high.

I heard Sean, "Lindsey, I'm cumming."

I felt him thrust up into me sending another shot of pleasure into my ass. His warm cum spread inside me. More pleasure. More warmth. I felt Sean grab my nipples and squeeze. Electricity shot out of my tits down my spine. I opened my eyes, Yes, Sean. Yes. Wave after wave washed over me.

I couldn't hold myself up anymore and I collapsed onto him. I felt his arms wrap around me and hold me tight. My body was still shaking. Holy fuck!