My Guilty Conscience

"This is nuts. What we shared was very special, yes, but it was only a really good screw. Yes, he's a fabulous guy, but I had no illusions that-"

"That's just it. You had no illusions, but he had plenty of illusions, most of them fueled by being in the arms of probably the sexiest woman on the planet. And you whispered in his ear everything he wanted to hear and lied to him dozens of times in all those emails and phone calls. Can't you see that? While there is still time, please, for heaven's sake, let everybody off the hook by breaking it off with him while there is still time. Lie to him, tell him you're already pregnant by some other guy. That might scare him off. Most guys aren't gonna want to stay with a girl if she is pregnant by someone else. Tell him the guy is black. That way he knows the child won't be interracial so that he could never pretend to the outside world that it was his own."

"Well, speaking of that. There is a chance, but very slight, that, well, I might end up...he never used a condom is what I'm trying to say."

Cheryl stared at me incredulously, almost as if someone had dropped two tons of bricks on her head.

"You can't be fucking serious," she whispered, looking completely blown away.

"I don't know what the big deal is," I countered. "Even if I am, you know, in the family way, there are options. I could go to a clinic."

"That doesn't sound like you. I know you Sally and you would probably want to keep it. How could you possibly have been so damn stupid? Turning your entire life upside down for a mere night of pleasure."

"It wasn't an ordinary night."

"So you keep telling me. And will Samuel think it is all hunky dory if you don't have the courage to end it and you have to tell him you are expecting another man's baby?"

I sighed. I had tried not to think about such things, supposing my chances of being knocked up were very small indeed.

"I wouldn't have to tell him that. I could always make love to him, and let him shoot it into me after one of his putrid thirty second thrusting sessions, then simply pretend the baby is his."

"You would actually stoop so damn low as to deny one man's right to know he was a father, and at the same time tell an innocent bystander that he was the father when you knew damn well he wasn't? And why have your figure all bent out of shape? I think the very last thing you need in your life right now is to bring another child into this whole sordid mess. Besides, what if Derrick doesn't believe you and thinks you are lying about the baby?"

"What was that?" I asked, my blood running cold.

"You heard me. What if Derrick puts two and two together and comes up with four? What if he decides that he might have been the one to impregnate you and that you are lying because you don't want him around?"

"Actually, if I am pregnant, which is highly unlikely, I wouldn't even have to tell him about the baby. I could just break it off with him and he would never be the wiser."

"And if he won't let you break it off? If he demands to know why you don't want to be with him? And if his private eye is better than Samuel's private eye, and your secret life is uncovered? Damn, so much can go wrong and you know what they say?"

"No, what do they say?"

"That whatever can go wrong, will go wrong."

"It damn well better not go wrong," I insisted.

"Derrick won't want to ever let you go unless you dump him quickly, as in right now. Why make him fall for you any deeper."

"I can handle Derrick."

"Well, if you won't listen to reason, at least make sure Derrick is wearing a damn condom next time you're handling him. A baby in this damnable sorry mix is the last thing you need right now."

"I've got everything under control."

"From where I sit, you are the one out of control. And I am one of those about to be caught in the crossfire. Here comes our crab legs. Let's not talk any more about any of this crap. It looks like a beautiful meal and I want to be able to keep it down."

XXX

I slipped the box of condoms into my purse. If Derrick wasn't going to be prepared this time, then I was certainly going to be. Cheryl's Sunday brunch talk on the evils of getting knocked up had resonated in my mind throughout the next few days. My period was due in less than a week and my fingers were very tightly crossed.

I knew that Samuel would be gunning for me on Saturday, and so I would out smart him by going to the gym as I usually did, and seeing Derrick on another day. Today to be precise.

Thursdays I normally taught a creative writing class on romance novels at the local community college. The class was six to nine at night. I usually went for a drink or two with some of my students afterward. All my students were female, and so Samuel never had a problem with me coming home around eleven. He knew I wasn't a lesbian. What he didn't know was that I would be leaving my assistant, Martha Gunn, in charge of this Thursday night's teaching. Meanwhile, I would be back at Derrick's place, languishing in his impossibly sweet arms.

In a way I would be killing two birds with one stone. The first stone was that, today, Thursday, Derrick would be relieved that I wasn't just a 'Saturday only' girl, and that would placate him over fears I might be married or engaged to marry someone else. The second stone was that Samuel's private eye photographer would undoubtedly be following me to the gym on Saturday, only to watch me actually work out and not do anything damning or suspicious. Samuel could never have suspected in a million years that I was now going to use Thursdays instead of Saturday as my weekly hump day. I figured that that in itself might be enough to change Samuel's mind that I had been cheating on him.

I kissed my darling daughters goodbye and glanced at the clock. It was five thirty exactly. The drive to the college generally took about twenty minutes.

"What time will you be home?" Samuel asked, having no idea that I was going to use tonight to light up my body using Derrick's incredibly skilful, long lasting cock.

I did the calculations in my head. I would leave class at six, reach Derrick's by six fifteen. Let him hump me silly until eight, grab a quick steamy thirty-five minute shower with Derrick lathering up my body, then be back for class by eight fifty-five. Then, I would bypass the usual drinks with the students and be back home by nine twenty.

"I should be home by nine twenty or so."

"No drinks with the students tonight?"

I looked at him and smiled. "I don't mind the laughs, but they often want me to pick up most of the tab. Splurging on a hundred dollars is not something I care to do every week. Maybe every other week."

He smiled back. "That's a smart move. We could use the extra for savings."

I knew that suggesting it would make him deliriously happy. It was funny how certain things happened to make some guys overjoyed. For Samuel, saving money was his pride and joy. For Derrick, it was delving deeply into my pussy's treasure trove to bring us both multiple orgasms.

I kissed Samuel on the cheek and skipped out the front door before turning to go bounding down the front steps.

His voice made me freeze.

"By the way, Dr. Lansing called."

"Oh?" I asked, turning to face him. I had heard him speak of the erectile dysfunction specialist before. Apparently he had a Swedish colleague that was coming to America for a year to do a tour and some rounds of experimental surgery. Samuel was high up on the operating list, although I wasn't holding my breath. Nothing seemed to work for Samuel, and chances were that this new and latest procedure wasn't going to work for him either. And even if it did work, that wouldn't be the most exciting thing to ever happen to me.

The most exciting thing to ever happen to me had already occurred last Saturday, when Derrick pounded my gushing pussy silly, and lambasted me with four earth shattering, unbearably sweet orgasms. I clutched my purse with the condoms inside, as it dangled from my arm. My clitoris was on fire and my breasts engorged and bullet tipped just thinking about it.

"The doctor thinks there is a chance, however slight, that the latest surgery may actually work this time. And the good news is that it will be covered by our health plan. It won't cost anything."

"That's great news, Samuel," I blurted out, trying to sound excited. But my heart and mind were already consumed with thoughts of Derrick. Did that mean I was falling in love with him? A part of me was beginning to suspect I probably wouldn't be able to give up Derrick no matter what happened.

I then finished bounding down the steps, my heart thumping with rabid anticipation. Derrick's super sweet, super skilled cock!!

I hopped into my car and watched out of the corner of my eye as the drapes shifted. Samuel was watching me leave.

Just as I suspected, the navy blue Volvo that had been following me around all week began following me again. Samuel had indeed hired a private eye. In a way I was relieved. The bungling detective would undoubtedly watch me pull into the college parking lot and his assumption would be that I would be teaching class. No way he'd bother coming inside to check. He might hang around till classes were over, but the very fact I'd told Samuel I wouldn't be going for drinks meant that the detective probably wouldn't bother coming back at nine to make sure it was only drinks I was having. In my mind I was certain Samuel was now phoning him to tell him about my new plans to come home early.

Traffic was light, and sure enough, even as pulled into the community college parking lot, the Volvo didn't bother parking or staying, but merely turned and left the same way it came. I was beginning to think I was getting really good at the cheating game, although it bothered me somewhat that I was developing such a strong emotional attachment for Derrick. The chemistry between us was certainly strong and vibrant, and my thoughts seemed to be continually of him throughout the day. It was one thing to become addicted to his amazing cock and superb lovemaking ways. It was quite another to actually fall in love with him the same way he seemed to be falling in love with me.

I turned off my engine and stepped out into the crisp, cooling, evening air. It still wasn't raining like the weather bureau had threatened it would.

I mounted the stone steps one by one, my mind churning over in pulse pounding anticipation of the lovemaking session that awaited me at Derrick's condo just fifteen minutes away.

My assistant was waiting for me when I arrived. She wanted to show me her lesson plan, but I told her that whatever she had planned was fine for me. I warned her to make sure she kept the class going till nine sharp. I wasn't sure if the private eye would return at that time to make sure I drove straight home.

I then slipped back out of class and snuck through a side entrance, scurrying like a rat around the back of the college to where an apartment complex rose ominously to the heavens.

A taxi stand was out front, and a row of empty cabs waited patiently for the frequent fares that came from a senior's home next door.

I hopped into the empty cab at the front of the line and spat out Derrick's address.

The taxi driver was a she, and she whisked me briskly out into the empty but windy road, flipping up the meter as she went.

XXX

I now stood for only the second time in my life on the ninety-eight floor, listening to the doors sling shut behind me.

"I'm so glad you could come today. I don't think I could have waited until Saturday. I would have gone out of my mind."

The sound of Derrick's voice, coming from behind me, startled the shit out of me.

"Damn, I didn't realize you'd already stepped out of your condo. Don't you ever do that," I begged, clutching my chest. "You scared me silly."

"Sorry," he said, wrapping his arms around my waist from behind, and nudging me towards the large double doors and the sheer paradise awaiting me inside.

Once inside he wasted no time. Neither of us had time for foreplay. All we wanted was to get it on.

My car keys jingled in my skirt pocket as he slid my skirt around my ankles. I kicked it away, then realized, much to my dismay, that I had foolishly left my purse, and the precious condoms it contained, in the car. I had been so excited, that I hadn't remembered to bring that which was truly important.

I didn't bother asking Derrick if he had any. I knew from our earlier back and forth emails during the day that he had none, which was why I had agreed to bring them with me. Only now, they were ninety-eight floors below, locked in my car.

He lift me off the ground, not caring that any sperm getting inside of me might make me pregnant. He actually hoped he'd one day trap me into being his girl. Where I was concerned, he was a man on fire.

He sat me on the arm of the couch, then dropped to his knees.

His mouth on my pussy was beyond glorious, sending my senses into a tailspin.

I climaxed at once, groaning as his tongue darted along my clitoris.

My fingers intertwined into his hair, pulling his sucking lips harder against the inferno now raging between my legs.

Years worth of pent up passion were now boiling over to the surface. I felt like a trapped bird freed from its cage, and my spirit soared on the wings of indescribable pleasure as I shivered with delight.

His warm strong hands along my thighs were masterful, and I grunted as he sucked with so much glee.

I instinctively wanted to tear my blouse off my body and let the buttons pop where they may, but a part of me intervened, forcing my fingers to exercise caution. Trying to explain to Samuel why my blouse was torn and had missing buttons would not be wise. I therefore used restraint in carefully but quickly undoing the buttons.

I then dropped my blouse onto the couch and undid my bra.

My boobs plopped out and I clutched them greedily, squeezing them to accentuate the raging bliss.

He suddenly stood, his cock pressing hard against my pussy as I squealed my approval.

My legs wrapped around his waist and he was gloriously inside of me, delivering thrusts that were full length and hard, with his dangling cum filled balls slapping off my bum.

My arms stayed wrapped around him, with my fingers anchored by my nails into his muscular V-shaped back.

"You have exactly two hours," I whispered in his ear, knowing he would much rather have the whole night. But it was what it was, and me being late again would not be wise.

XXX

I was gratified that Samuel didn't seem to suspect anything at all after the Thursday night class. I was even more gratified that he seemed relieved after his 'secret' private eye had followed me to the gym and back on Saturday, no doubt giving me a passing grade to Samuel.

What I wasn't gratified about, however, was the fact that my period had not yet arrived by Tuesday as it should have. My period had never been late before, not ever, and in my mind that could only mean one damn thing. I had foolishly allowed myself to become pregnant.

"Hot damn," I whispered to myself, knowing I now had a decision to make. Either I was going to get rid of it, or else I was going to have to make love in one of Samuel's patented thirty second quickie sessions, and then claim the baby was his.

"Fuck." I really didn't want to have a baby right now, especially with all the turmoil and uncertainty raging in my confused and upside down life. I also had to face the fact that if I kept the damn baby, then Derrick would know it was his, which meant that he would want he and I to get married. Or, at the very least, for sure he would want to be in my life a whole lot more than he was now. That was not going to be an option, unless I had it in me to divorce Samuel and let him get custody of my two daughters. That was definitely not an option either. I was trapped and now pondered the lessor of two evils.

The fact that I was falling so badly in love with Derrick had the word catastrophe written all over it. I began to think in earnest over what the hell I should do. Derrick had emailed me four times since morning, demanding I confirm that I would be coming to his condo in the sky this Thursday night. I sighed bitterly, knowing that if I was going to get Derrick the hell out of my system, then now was the time to do it. A part of me was leaning toward me keeping the baby, but I couldn't do it with Derrick still in my life. I sighed a second time. How could I possibly stop seeing Derrick? And yet, if I wanted to keep Derrick and Samuel, then the baby would have to go.

Samuel must have believed that I wasn't cheating, because the Volvo nosy parker wasn't following me around anymore.

By the time Monday morning came I was climbing the walls. I had always believed that the more sex a woman got, was the less she would need. How absolutely wrong I was. I had suddenly become desperate to get it on with Derrick all the time. We met that Monday at noon at his condo, and I made Cheryl promise to cover for me by saying, if Samuel should phone and ask, that we had a long drawn out lunch lasting from twelve to two thirty.

That Tuesday night, as Samuel was going to bed, I gave him his usual cup of herbal relaxing tea, only this time I slipped a couple of sleeping pills into it. Then, making sure the girls were sound asleep also, I tip toed off to Derrick's condo from one in the morning to five in the morning racking up so many orgasms that I actually lost count.

Then, Wednesday night, as I was sitting under the stars on the front porch, salivating over the upcoming Thursday night 'class,' Samuel comes onto the porch and lays a bombshell on me.

"They've scheduled me for this Friday morning."

Samuel's words broke my concentration. I had been trying to remember all the positions Derrick had been getting me in as of late.

"They've scheduled you for what Friday morning?"

"The surgery," Samuel shot back. "Haven't you been listening to a word I've been saying this past week? The doctor from Sweden is almost certain he can fix my problem so that you and I can have a normal and healthy sex life."

"I remember you telling me that, but it didn't sound like it was going to happen any time soon. Isn't there a waiting list of some kind?"

"Yep, but because I got on board so damn early, I am the first in line."

"Wow. How soon after the operation can you start, you know, having sex?"

"The very next day, which means that if all goes well, you and I can be going at it like rabbits by the end of the week, Sunday morning to be precise."

XXX

What a difference a week makes.

Sunday is breakfast in bed, and a good two and a half hour dose of Samuel's very first time with his new and improved sex prowess.

Monday afternoon Cheryl lies for me by saying she and I have a long drawn out lunch. What I really have, is Derrick's delicious cock to eat and fuck for a full three hours.

Tuesday night is sleeping pill night, where my pussy gets pounded for four hours in the arms of Derrick's muscular, hunky body.

Wednesday night is early bed night for the girls, so that Samuel can spend hours catching up making love for all the times he couldn't during our marriage.

Thursday night is class night, where my pussy undergoes yet three hours more in the capable hands of Derrick's insatiable cock.

Friday night belongs to Samuel, who is incredibly horny again, and insists on keeping me up half the night.

Saturday afternoon is gym day, and Derrick is insistent upon me showing up for yet another three hour session.

After just one week of the seven day sex fest, my pounded pussy begins to scream at me for a damn break. Too much of a good thing is far too much for my weary overworked pussy to handle. It had gone from no sex in five years, to suddenly having mega hours of intense sex each and every day.