All Comments on 'My Sister and I: Love Twice Over'

Keep it up! I want to hear more. That was very well done, romance, desire, passion.

I loved it keep writing

Congratulations! A good first effort, and the first time a Literotica writer used the term "my frenulum" in describing an intimate erotic encounter.

You are destined to become a great author, though I wonder, will it be for Literotica or for Medical textbooks?

Whatever, BUT keep writing.

big words don't make a great story remember "KISS-KEEP IT SIMPLE STUPID" big words turn off readers stop trying to sound like a big shot and use simple normal words. negative 50 for acting so uppity and word snobish.

i really enjoyed your story, to bad all the fucking comments are from english teachers... good work and keep it up..... thanks

good writers should be appreciated. Of course this particular fantasy, I have realised, can be reduntant, if like me you have some real sisters.

While I recognize that my darling sisters have been of enormous benefit, in that through them I've been courted by countless girls, and had almost every guy alive that met any of them buddying up with me, I also know that they are my sisters, and what you're suggesting is just plain wrong.

Sorry if I offend anyone. I know it's just a story. I'd love the fantasy, it just doesn't work for me.

Your story is the best first attempt I've ever read. Please continue writting.

One of the best incest stories I have ever read on here. Very well written too. Hard to believe it is a first effort. Can't wait to read more from you.

For your first I had to give you a "5" and just wish Lit. had a '10' as I would have put that in my comment also. You are on your way ~~ keep it up and don't let these Neg's get to you as they are just mad because they can't even spell there own name.

Thanks. JAG

I liked this story as it is. I didn't see any big words, but then I did graduate the third grade. Don't listen to people that give non helpful criticisms, only listen if people are trying to help your writing! Keep up the great writing.

Great story honey, isn't incest romance the best. I soo love this story and hope it continues.

Ok I really don't understand some of these comments. I thought it was a great story. I found nothing about it "upity" or "snobbish." I also don't understand those that don't like incest stories reading them and then commenting on how "wrong" they are. Uhg. Anyway, you did awesome. Please keep writing and it wouldn't hurt my feelings at all to see another chapter of this story.

Please ignore anyone who is too simple minded to appreciate the wonderful way that you write!!! Your story was well thought out and just beautifully written. It was a pleasure to read! For a first effort I'd say you're well on your way to becoming a very accomplished story teller should you choose to continue to write!!!

A very well written story with a sweet and loving storyline, and best of all it has a happy ending.

Wanting someone for so long and then finally getting her to love you, is a very nice and romantic storyline.

Thanks for the read.

This is a rather long comment, but in case you hadn't noticed, I'm a rather long-winded person. So if you would please bear with me....

First of all, thanks for your support everybody! Positive or negative, I'm always happy to receive feedback, as long as it's constructive. It's amazing to think that something I created has been viewed over 22,000 times, and in such a short amount of time too!

I actually wrote this story 3 years ago, but only recently submitted it here (with minimal editing). So maybe my writing style has evolved since then; it remains to be seen. As for the way I use my words: it's just a part of how I write, in that I want to communicate exactly what I mean, and therefore try to pick the perfect word for the job. However, I understand that my work could be more accessible, and, should I continue writing, I will work on that. Also, after re-reading this piece some time after the fact, I realize that my character and plot development is nowhere near the high standard set by the quality authors here, and so I will work on that too.

This brings me to my question: having read the story, what do you guys think I should do next? Do you want to hear more stories about these two siblings? I imagine I could come up with some, but the ending to this story seems so final (and I like that about it), that I'm almost reluctant to keep moving forward with it. However, if you all think it would be worth writing more, I will do it, since, after all, I do my work for you.

Beyond that, I also want to know: if I wrote more stories, perhaps with more diverse subject matter, would you guys read it? As a full time student, I definitely don't have the time to be as prolific as some other writers, but if the readers are patient with me, I think I would enjoy writing some now and then, and I could probably use a creative outlet for my twisted mind.

Please leave your thoughts on these matters, so I know what I should do: if I receive enough positive support, I will probably start writing some more. Also, please keep up the constructive criticism!

I agree with most of the commentators above in that you really must ignore the just out of pre-school types who have difficulty reading words with more than one syllable.

Your writing aside, I was madly impressed by the emotion and intensities you managed to achieve.

Damn good job

you screwed up this one glad you didn't bother to screw up any more.

I'm sorry I can't rate this higher than a five like it deserves

Make the girl a virgin who waited for her brother. Nothing angers me more than a girl who didn't save herself for the love of her life. Fix this disaster. Now.

kiss ass readers will not help you improve so ignore them completly. the only way you will ever improve is if you listen to the honest readers that complain about your writing. fix the complaints and you will improve, listen to the kiss asses and you will fail.

lots of flows in the story... need to rewrite it seriously

Very well done,you captured the moment perfectly,his overpowering desire for his older sister,his anxiety as he started to feel he may loose her forever and trying to find a way to communicate his love ans passion for her.Would like to see more chapters to see how the two start a life together and the struggles they encounter.

Since your last submission a long time has passed, but I reckon life gets in the way more often than not. Keep it up, bless us with another submission.

FW

great first time i loved it. now how about another chapter? what happens to their love? will they be exclusive? i hope so true love is only between 2 people.

babbling. Blah, blah, blah. Should be one page at the most. Keep trying...

beautifully written!! i love when there's romance mixed in sibcest. the guy here was such a romantic i think it's precious.