My Wife Goes on a Date

"Why are you telling me now? Why didn't you tell me before?" A long silence. "Let me ask you a personal question, Judy. Don't answer if you don't want to. Have you ever been ravaged or fucked rough?"

"Uh...yes."

"And did you like it?"

"Like it? No. I loved it."

"Why?"

She took a deep breath and looked directly in my eyes. "Speaking for myself... and only for myself... when I have sex, I try to make it as enjoyable for my partner as he is trying to make it enjoyable for me. That means I tend to follow certain conventions in touching, feeling and fucking. But on those occasions when the partner, or environment, or events, or even alcohol provide sufficient additional stimuli the sex can be totally out of this world. A slap on the ass, a tug on the hair or anything else out of the realm of what we call 'normal' can heighten the sexual experience considerably."

Holy shit. She had obviously given this a lot of thought. I looked at her and her eyes were no longer looking at me. She was looking through me and into some memory.

"Have you ever passed out when you orgasmed?"

"No, but I talked to a woman who has and apparently it is quite an experience."

"Jodie did."

"What?"

"Jodie did. I watched her on the video I have. She was out for a few seconds."

"Oh my God. Really?"

I took a sip of my wine and didn't answer. We sat there for a long time each lost in our own thoughts.

"Trey?"

"Yes?"

"Could I watch it sometime? The part where she passes out. Could I watch it? The thought of it turns me on so much I'm getting wet just sitting here."

I have known this woman for a large part of my life and I never dreamed I would ever hear anything like that come out of her mouth...or that it would turn me on.

That feeling started in my groin... the tingling... and it moved up and spread out. Over three months of celibacy was catching up with me. I wasn't interested in making love. I wanted to fuck someone.

"I think that could be arranged."

She smiled.

I went home a short time later. In bed my thoughts were on fucking. Not love making. This time there was a face attached to it and the face belonged to Judy.

She and I talked several times over the next couple of days. She gave me Jodie's address and told me that she had talked to Jodie and told her the divorce papers were coming. I gave it to my attorney who almost immediately sent Jodie the divorce papers.

Judy and I decided that Friday night we would go out to dinner then go back to my house and watch the video. She was quick to point out that a revenge fuck...or any other kind of fuck...was not in the cards and if that was my plan, I should forget it. She was not going to sleep with her brother-in-law. Period.

On Thursday morning, I was at work and received another call from Michael Hamilton.

"Hello Mr. Taylor. Thought I would bring you up to date on current events. Stan Morrison just quit. He didn't give a notice. He just walked in, cleaned out his desk, told the boss and left. He told one of the other people in the office that he was moving to Florida. "

"Well, well, well. That's interesting. Thank you, Mr. Hamilton. I appreciate you telling me. Oh, by the way, how are you getting along?"

"Pretty well, thank you for asking. My wife has confessed to stealing and has 'copped a plea'. She will get a light sentence but her boyfriend is looking at a pretty lengthy stay in prison. I hope he serves every single day as some big dicked bubba's girlfriend."

I laughed.

We chatted another couple of minutes and ended the call. Then I called Judy.

"Hi. I was just thinking about you." She said when she answered.

"How long have you known that Stan Morrison was moving to Fort Lauderdale?" Up until now I don't think she knew that I knew his name.

A long silence.

"Judy, how long have you known?"

"Trey...I..."

"How long?"

"A few days."

"How many times have they seen each other since she moved there?"

"Trey... listen to..."

"How many fucking times have they seen each other since she moved there?"

A short pause.

"Four. She's been here twice and he's gone there twice."

"They've seen each other four times that you know about? And you were okay with knowing that she was still fucking that asshole and you were okay with her coming back to me after all that?"

"Trey...I...she's my sister and..."

I ended the call. My phone rang immediately. It was Judy. I ignored that call and her next three calls as well.

I sat in my cubicle for a couple of minutes then walked out to the maintenance shop. I enjoyed talking to the mechanics and watching them work on the RV's. One of the mechanic's was a good friend. Last year the Army retired him because of wounds received in Iraq. His left leg below the knee and two of the fingers of his left hand had been blown off.

He and my boss were the only two people at the dealership aware of my situation. We went outside and sat at the employee's picnic table and I brought him up to date.

"I can arrange for him to not make it to Florida if you want me to."

"Nah. Neither of them is worth going to jail for. I just want to be rid of her."

"I can arrange that as well."

I laughed. "Nah. Having to live with herself should be punishment enough."

So we talked some more until we heard over the loudspeaker, "Trey, call on line four. Trey, line four."

I went back to my cubicle.

"Trey Taylor."

"Trey, please don't hang up."

I hung up and walked over to the receptionist. "No more calls for me today. I'm going home."

I turned down my street and saw Judy's car sitting in front of my house. I pulled in my driveway and into my garage. The garage door closed before she got to it so she went to the front door and knocked. I guess she still remembered my threat about what I would do if she rang the bell.

I went into the house through the garage and into the kitchen. She was still knocking. I decided to open the door.

"You're not welcome here."

"Trey, listen."

I closed the door in her face. I didn't slam it this time.

I love Italian food so I heated a frozen spaghetti and meatball dinner and went to my bedroom. By 10:00 PM, I was asleep. The next morning I showered, shaved, dressed and went to work.

Judy was waiting for me. I guess she thought I wouldn't cause a scene at work. She was wrong. I tried to walk past her. She grabbed my arm.

"Goddamn it, Trey, listen to me!"

"You have nothing to say I want to hear. But I've got something to say to you. You were willing to let her come back to me knowing she fucked that lowlife son of a bitch over and over and you weren't going to tell me. All three of you can rot in hell."

It was a long time before I saw her again, but she talked to my mother occasionally.

So now the whole dealership was aware of my situation. It had the makings of a long day. I paced around the dealership for a couple of hours trying to figure out what I wanted to do next.

I managed to get through the day and headed home. My mother called and invited me to dinner. I went and she had Italian of course. She, my step-father and I enjoyed the meal and most of the evening. The enjoyment ended when she said. "I spoke to Judy today."

"Mom, another word about that family and I'm leaving."

"Trey, listen to me. There's something you don't know."

"I know all I need to, Mom. Jodie cheated and I'm divorcing her."

"Okay. That's fine. She cheated and you're divorcing her. But what are you going to do about the baby?"

"Oh, shit, Mom. You're not going to fall for that, are you?"

"There's nothing to fall for, Trey. She's pregnant. I talked to her myself when she was here."

"You what?" I literally jumped up.

"I saw her and she told me."

"She was here and you didn't tell me?"

"Trey, she asked us not to."

"So you listened to a certified cheating whore and disregarded the feelings of your own son?"

"We thought you needed a little more time to forgive her."

"Forgive her? Are you crazy? Have you forgotten what your life was like living with a cheater?"

"Sweetie, things are different now. It's a different world. People are freer to try new things and..."

I stormed out of the house. Was I living in some universe where everything was upside down and backwards? My mother lived through hell as my father cheated time after time and now she's telling me that it might be all right for my wife to cheat. I loved my mother, but her naivety was amazing; and gullible? God help her but in the age of smart phones and the internet, she would still buy an encyclopedia from a traveling salesman. But to tell me I should forgive Jodie was way over the line even for her.

I headed home but drove by my house and didn't stop. I ended up at the dealership. I had keys so I went in. There was a sofa in the employee's break room so I lay down and tried to slow my mind down. It didn't work. I tossed and turned until almost five before falling asleep. I woke up at 10:30. The boss had come in at some point and had seen me asleep, so he put a sign on the door and told everybody not to bother me.

When I did start moving around one of the other salesmen told me that the boss wanted to see me in his office. I felt like shit. My back hurt from sleeping on the sofa, I needed a shower and shave and my mouth tasted like shit, but I went to see the boss.

"Trey, you need some time off and I have just the way you can get it. Do you remember the Jacobson's; that elderly couple you sold the nice blue Prevost to a few months ago?"

"Yes."

"Well, they were in Vancouver, Canada, last week and he had a heart attack. He will be okay but the coach needs to get home. They want somebody to bring it back for them and they asked for you."

"Sounds right up my alley right about now. When can I leave?"

"You can fly out tomorrow. Janey will get you a flight. Use the company credit card for expenses."

"Sounds good."

"Now get your ass home, clean up and pack. It should take about four days to get back. If I were you, I'd take ten. The Jacobson's are in no big hurry and I certainly don't need you back here too soon. Just give Ben any deals you have pending and he can handle them for you."

I went straight to the hospital when I arrived in Vancouver. Mr. Jacobson had lots of tubes and machines attached to and sticking out of him and Mrs. Jacobson was puttering around trying to make him more comfortable and he was grousing about her bothering him and not letting him sleep. They both had smiles on their faces. It was obvious they just wanted to be near each other and seemed to be grateful that they were.

I stood there for several minutes, content to watch. I realized that I was smiling for the first time in a long time.

Mrs. Jacobson looked up and saw me.

"Trey! It's good to see you." As she hugged me.

"Hey, Trey. How was your flight?" Piped up Mr. Jacobson.

"Now be quiet, Robert. You know what the doctor said." Said Mrs. Jacobson. She patted my arm. "I can tell him to be quiet now and he can't argue with me because it's doctor's orders." She winked at me.

We sat, talked and watched as Robert floated in and out of sleep. Every time we thought he was out a nurse would come in and 'check his vitals' or adjust his medication or some other medical related task.

Mrs. Jacobson told me where the motor coach was. She also told me that two of their grandchildren had been with them but their grandson had flown home. Their granddaughter was packing a few things for them to take home with them when Robert was released but she, the granddaughter, would be riding back with me.

We finished talking as the granddaughter came in carrying two small overnight cases she had packed for her grandparents. She was about my age and attractive in that girl next door sort of way. We were introduced. She ignored the introduction and me and actually snorted at me before talking to her grandmother. They chatted for a short time then turned to me.

"Darla," she indicated her granddaughter, "has been driving our car this last week or so. We towed it behind the coach. She will take you to the coach so you can do whatever it is that you need to get it ready to go."

Darla started to protest, but was cut off. "Now, stop it, Darla. I told you we will be fine so don't worry about us." She looked at me. "No offense, Trey, but Darla doesn't want to go back with you. She thinks she needs to stay with us. By the way Trey, your boss told us that it might take you a few extra days to get back because you were taking some time off. You might want to consider going through Yellowstone. We promised Darla we would go through there on our way home."

"I'll see what I can do, Mrs. Jacobson." And we started to leave.

"Oh Trey, here's a letter authorizing you to take the coach across the border. Your boss said it might be a good idea." She said taking a letter from her purse. She handed it to me and kissed me on the cheek. "Thank you for doing this and be careful."

Darla and I headed for the car and then to the RV Park. She drove but bitched and moaned the whole time but never said a word directly to me. I tried several times to start a conversation but she made it clear she wasn't interested so I looked out the side window. When we arrived at the coach, she immediately went inside. I wanted to hook the car to the coach and be ready for an early morning departure but she had taken the car keys inside with her. I went in and asked her for them. She literally threw them at me and I had to duck to keep from being hit in the eye.

"What is wrong with you?" I asked as I reached down to pick them up. For the last few weeks I had dealt with asshole women and I was getting pretty damn tired of it.

I went to the car, positioned it behind the coach and hitched it.

I did my 'walk around inspection' of the coach then sat in one of the lawn chairs. After a short break I thought it would be nice to have a cold beer so I put the chairs and a small table in one of the lower storage compartments of the coach then went inside to see if the Jacobson's had any beer. Darla was looking in the refrigerator.

"Any beer in there? Or anything good to eat?"

"I'm not your fucking maid." As she slammed the refrigerator door and went into the bedroom and closed the door.

That was it. Fuck these attitudinal women. I'd been shit on enough; Jodie, Judy, my mother and now this bitch I didn't even know. I was fed up with them. All of them. Mrs. Jacobson was the only one who had even remotely acted with amenity.

Ten days my ass. I hadn't heard a single civil word from this person all day and had no intention of tolerating her sorry assed attitude any longer than necessary. I would get this coach home in two! The less time spent with her the better. I went outside, disconnected the external power and water lines, went back inside, sat in the driver's seat, started the engine, put Houston, Texas, in the GPS, raised the levelers, put that sucker in gear and headed south. It was 6:00PM and I hadn't wanted to start until the next morning, but little miss attitude in the bedroom changed my mind. By 8:00, I had crossed into the United States and had cleared Customs. She had to come out long enough for that then retreated back to the bedroom.

The fuel tanks were full so I had two hundred gallons of Number 1 Diesel fuel and that big Cummins engine wanted to rock and roll so we did. At 7 the next morning we were in Burley, Idaho. I had stopped twice during the night to make coffee and sandwiches and was more than a bit tired.

I felt rather than saw little miss attitude. She sat in the passenger seat and looked out the windshield. After a few minutes she spoke. "I'm hungry. Is there anything to eat?"

Just hearing her speak made my tiredness evaporate and my desire to end this trip quickly increase. Remembering what she told me the evening before when I asked if there was anything good to eat, "I'm not YOUR fucking maid." I said as I pressed down on the accelerator pedal. She glared at me then stormed back to the bedroom.

A little before nine I really had to piss so I pulled into a rest area. I went to the bathroom on the coach and pissed. When I came out, she had the front door open and was stepping off the coach.

"If you get off this coach you're not getting back on because I'm leaving." I sat back down and pushed the button to release the parking brake. I put the coach in gear just in time for her to storm back into the bedroom.

By noon, my ass was dragging. Driving 18 hours is never a good idea, but I had and it had kicked my ass so I pulled into another rest area, parked between two 18-Wheelers, and lay down on the sofa. I was out almost immediately. I awoke to the hum of that Cummins diesel and the feeling of movement. I sat up and looked at my watch. I had slept for five hours. Miss attitude was in the driver's seat and we were rolling. Fast. I stood up and walked to where I could look over her shoulder. I watched for a couple of minutes and decided that she knew what she was doing. Her grandfather had apparently taught her well. I fixed a cup of coffee and sat in the passenger seat and sipped.

Two hours and not a word. Good.

I was starting to get concerned about our fuel situation, however. We had been going about 25 hours or so. At an average speed of 60, we had gone approximately 1500 miles. At 8mpg, we had burned most of our fuel.

I decided to broach the subject." We should probably stop at the next truck stop for fuel." No response. "Excuse me, but we might need fuel."

"I took care of it while your sorry ass was snoring."

She was full of surprises, this girl. I went back to the sofa and was soon back asleep. I had not seen her use the bathroom, eat or drink. She must have accomplished both while I slept.

Three more hours I slept while she drove. I was impressed with her ability to drive...and control her bladder.

Finally, she pulled into a truck stop in Dumas, Texas, and parked. It was a little after 10 PM. She got up, and I watched as she fixed a sandwich, took a soda from the refrigerator and disappeared into the bedroom. That was my cue to drive. So, I did; after fixing two chicken salad sandwiches and brewing a thermos of coffee I sat back in the driver's seat and headed for Houston.

I stopped once during the night to piss and get some Cheetos and coffee. At eight the next morning I pulled into the lot at the dealership in Houston. I needed to sleep but I also needed to use the bathroom so I opened the door and stepped down. It was the first time I had gotten off the coach since we went through U.S. customs... when was that? A week ago? It wasn't, of course, but it sure as hell felt like it. Actually, it had been less than 40 hours ago. My ass was dragging but at least I was finished with little miss attitude.

I used the bathroom generally reserved for our customers because I really needed to go. I stepped out just in time to see the Jacobson's car headed out the gate. The driver's window was open and there was a middle finger high in the air. I returned the 'salute'. It was almost time for the staff to start arriving so I thought I would brew a pot of coffee in the employee's break room. When I went in, I felt the sofa calling my name so I answered.

I didn't move until after three in the afternoon. I got up, yawned, scratched my ass and started out the door. There was a note in large letters telling me to see the boss if I ever woke up.

I walked down the hall and knocked.

"Come in."

I entered.

"You know, the other employees are getting really tired of you monopolizing the break room."

I yawned.

"I received a phone call this morning. From Mrs. Jacobson."

I scratched my ass again and sat.

"It was a very interesting conversation." Pause. "She wanted to know how you did it."