All Comments on 'Mystery Woman'

The story held my interest to the end. Nice job and thanks for the hard work for us readers. This is a winner.

Awesome story, I read it in one go. Easy 5*.

Good, believable characters and an interesting plot line.

Thanks.

Very nicely done!

Very nicely done!

Great read! That was powerful.

Hooked

Wow! A great story. Kept me engrossed all the way through. For me the only criticism is that some of the scenes between Morg and Brea didn't quite ring true, when Brea was relating what happened with Bob there wasn't the intensity and desperation from Brea that you would expect. She almost related the encounter in an off the cuff manner.

Other than that I thought it was a brilliantly told story.

Many thanks.

This was a very outstanding story, believable, true to life. Not really a stroker kind of story, but I was not looking for that. Really enjoyed reading this, Thanks for taking the time to write this and allowing all of us to read it. 5 ***** all the way and worth more.

Love your stories - this was another great one.

A good, easy read.

I enjoyed that. While there were quite a few characters, they were introduced in a manner that I didn't have trouble keeping them straight. For the complexity of the story, the length was good. Your stories are always an easy read, and this one was as well. 5*, of course.

Nice work on a thriller, which can be a challenge. Thanks for taking the time and for sharing.

Very entertaining story!

After reading this story, two things come to mind.

First, can you say JINXED?

Remember Al Capp's old cartoon Li'l Abner character Joe Btfsplk with the "black cloud", and the old HEEHAW TV show jingle, "If it weren't for bad luck ..."?

Second, in consideration of the virtual parade of unrelated rough characters that plagued the young lady of this story (I know, it's FICTION), and Sinatra's song lyrics notwithstanding, I hope I may be forgiven for concluding that Chicago is not my kind of town.

This had it all...great writing....plot....editing....characters.

Kept me engaged throughout.

Many kudos! Easily 5*****

Whew, Talk about a story sucking you in...This story was it. Couldn't stop reading till the end - and I wished there were more pages. Fantastic job on a Fantastic story.

Thank you for a terrific story.

Top notch

Love a good happy ending.

With laptopwriter, it could go either way (which is part of the intrigue), so it's nice to see the peeps come out ok.

I’ve been reading the stories in this series in the order in which they’re listed. This is by far the best so far. A solid five stars.

What a powerful story. A great combination of mystery and love story.

Twists and turns in this one are great. Only loose ends were the mob boss and Harley and Corrine's drunken father. Excellent character development. Well done!

when we get a new LTW story.

One of the best!

Loved it. 5 stars.

"Both women were also hungry. There was a take-out menu from the local pizza place on a little corner table near the phone."

At first I wondered why you thought it was important to give us pointless details about a pizza order. But then I saw your subtle innuendo that Cory and Janet were sharing a bed, you devil you. "Both women were Also hungry." Yeah, what else were they?

I'm no expert on motels, but every room I've been in with two beds has the phone placed on a night stand between the two beds. The only way the phone could have been on a Corner table was if there was just one bed. Why would Janet and Cory be sleeping in the same bed? Bingo, another queer Chicago cop. Most of them are cock suckers, but I guess there could be some taco eaters mixed in. How clever!

The rest of the story was more direct and obvious, so I'm glad there was at least a little subtlety and mystery.

Thanks for the effort.

5 Stars

Interesting in that the amnesia likely led to her to find someone like Jarrod. Not only because it afforded her the circumstances to meet Jarrod, but it erased all the negative feelings, the self-doubt, the bad choices she had made because of her history, and allowed her to be her true self, which allowed her to meet and be with good people.

I had a relative that had amnesia for a few weeks. When he did he was in his 50's and by that age and life experiences he had become a more serious person. When he had the amnesia he had reverted to a much more humorous, light-hearted, flirtatious person (he was heavily flirting with all the nurses; taking major notice of hot young women, etc). His memory had gone (though he remembered things from a years and decades ago), his personality had reverted back to a much younger age, but his character and the man he was never wavered. Couldn't help but think Cory's true character, unstained by her hard life, came out because of her amnesia and created the opportunity for good things to happen for her.

Really enjoyed reading this story. Thank you for taking the time and putting in all the effort for us. You're one hell of a writer.

Enjoyed the story, good pace and detail.

A Real Classic

One of the best I’ve ever read in LW. Thank you

Another fantastic story from one of my favorite authors.

Outstanding! One of your best .⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Absolutely amazing story!!

I sighed when I saw it was 9 pages, because quite honestly few are worth more than 2 or 3 pages and thats how long most 9 page stories should be. Not this one, it was worth every page.

I know not everyone can write a story this good, and clearly many do not want to try, but this is a good benchmark to aim for.

Thank you!

written in your usual stellar fashion. I usually like the treatment of your characters and the way they relate to the spouse that cheats but this time I can't imagine how Morg could forgive his wife for what she did and how she continued to feel about what she did. The first time she had lunch with the former lover she was guilty of infidelity. Just a couple of lunches? Man was not a family friend or a relative of any kind. He was not a business associate or a customer of the wife's business. What she did was straight up infidelity and she compounded that by continuing the relationship and even going out at night while her husband was at work. Dinner and dancing are not little offenses. The sex act itself is not necessary for going too far. The fact that the wife thought it was a game she should be playing and that being very nearly naked in bed with the non husband was a near miss but acceptable shows that she is not ready to be married and will probably do it again later on when the dust settles. She even went so far as to compare it to him flirting with someone. When she felt that a good offense was the best defense she couldn't have thought much of Morg. Gave it a 4 star rating because of the writing and because no one asked him if he would be better off with her or without her.

9 pages for it to end up as a Damn reconciliation.

Brea didn’t see what she was doing with her ex-boyfriend was dishonest, disrespectful towards her husband, and playing with fire even if she had not planned to have sex it was still cheating. Morg should have served her at least with separation papers, forced her to get a job, and live separately to make sure Brea really was the person he wanted to be married to.

The writing and creativity definitely is a 4*.

Being true to my feelings at the resolution 1* because of the RAAC.

Always a good story!

5

A great story.

Thank you

Cheers

Very well written as always. My only beef is that Brea did absolutely nothing to remotely win back Morg's trust. She just blew the whole sordid affair off as some kind of innocent game. While she didn't fuck the slimeball she was damn nearly raped and still cheated in my opinion. But to her it was just a little harmless fun to pass the time while her husband was working to support them. I see it as totally disrespectful to Morg. Don't see how Morg could not always be wondering in the future what Brea might be doing while he's working or she's out shopping etc. Constantly worrying and checking up on an untrustworthy wife isn't much of a marriage or life to lead.

I've seen steady progression in your writing this year and this story sits at the pinnacle of your accomplishments. Every part of the story hits on all cylinders, great character development, plot twists, and solid finish. Great job - one of the best in Randi's event! 6*

Terrific story. 5+

She said “ I believe in the vows we took, I promised to be faithful, to honor and cherish in sickness and in health, for richer, for poorer, until death do us part. I meant it, Morg. They're the most important words I've ever spoken." Was dating another man, going to dinner, making out with him - honoring and cherishing her husband? So I guess the vow was not that important to her, was it?

Really a great and involving story. The reconciliation really worked - don't pay attention to the LW trolls.

Truly magnificent

In your opening paragraph you say I am not a professional writer (actually you said witer..but who cares). Then you write 9 pages proving without any doubt that you absolutely should be. This series of stories has produced some great tales and some of the best writers appear here. Thank you for this it really was excellent!

A superlative story from a superlative author.

This contest just seems to bring out the best in authors

Well done Laptopwtiter for such a fantastic tale. I felt like I was there with them. A true mark of a top story.

Scores an easy 5/5

WOW. What an incredible story

Brea definitely cheated and it doesn't matter that they didn't have intercourse. She carried on with someone and was pretty unrepentant and never truly owner her actions. She was relieved at the end because she got what she wanted. She rug swept the problem and he allowed it because of what he observed of Cory's circumstance. Truthfully, it was a bad reconciliation because the major issues weren't resolved. Other people's misery have no place when evaluating the stability of a relationship. Trust me. I have worked with seriously traumatized and abused individuals and in the next session met with someone with far less problems whose marriage is in jeopardy. The two have nothing to do with each other.

I forgot to add, the ending has a "be grateful for being blessed for what you have because others suffer" In some ways it is a fine message and a good reminder to have perspective. It's kind of like the saying "first world problems" Throwing a tantrum because the supermarket ran out of your favorite brand and then it ruins your day. That is the appropriate time for perspective. Being in a situation where your wife has maintained an affair, but never had sex... apples and oranges.. no apples and watermelon. Different fruit and the watermelon is a whole lot bigger.

Loved your story. No real heartache over the reconciliation, but in the end, I think he made too little of it. Counseling, at a minimum, would be required before agreeing to take the threat of divorce off the table. Something needs to wake her up.

What she did could easily have destroyed his trust in her... permanently. She kept saying, "I wouldn't do that to you.", but, in fact, she'd just proven otherwise, so how much of a reach is it for Morgan to believe she did other stuff? Suspicion, once it's aroused, is hard to put back down.

She put herself in a place where her actions eliminated the ability to defend herself, but I'm glad everything worked out for them.

Nice story with happy endings all around. Thanks for posting. 5 stars.

The restaurant was perfect. He had been there several times and knew the layout. He also knew he could get in and out through the back door. The place would be packed on a Saturday night. The more people, the bigger the panic when the shooting started. Everyone would be too busy diving under tables to pay any attention to the shooter.

The more people the more witnesses you're going to have. He would be recognized by someone. Other than that it is a great story.

Thanks.

So far of all the stories I read for this series Laptopwriter's one is the one that most closely resembles the title: Hanging by a Thread. This was spellbinding. Absolutely brilliant. 5*****

It was a mishmash of three stories. Felt forced. Not up to the authors usual excellence.

A wonderful tale that combined different story lines seamlessly into one. Thank you for writing this especially as I thought it was going to end badly for all involved but you brought it back from the edge. 5*

Kept me locked in for the entire story. Great blend of multiple story lines. I think Brea should paid a bit more pain for her detestable actions. At least counseling at a minimum. Otherwise - not bad at all.

... Not only was this story well written but it actually had an ending, something that most of the stories on this site seldom have these days. Actually, I'm not surprised because I've always considered you one of the best writers on Literotica. As usual, you didn't disappoint.

Well done!

A solid complex plot

played to perfection.

I would've dumped the cheater,

but that doesn't lessen my respect

for this story.

Top ratings from me.

I have enjoyed many of your other stories and you did a great job with this one and it deserves a FIVE***** Thank you

Thanks for a great tale!

I was thinking that Morg and "Linda" would somehow stray or perhaps she and Brea, but was totally surprised by overhearing the foncon. LOVED seeing police as regular people. Jerrod might deserve his own story.

Thanks again!

Good story, real good story. Five thumbs up. I love the happy ending.

Not surprised a bit; as always, a really excellent, very well written story. I always look forward to your postings.

Helluva yarn

Outstanding storyline, well carried out.

5*

Good story enjoyed

jtwheels

Excellent story. Thank you. You don't see any action or mystery stories any more. Great writing.

5 stars, wish I could give you more! Great story, I actually got a little dust in my eyes.

got a little maudlin

Sappy

You should consider doing this professionally, have read all your stories, and the one thing you do is take me on a journey,

Thank you

Predictable, romance novel cliff notes. Cliche at best.

Terrific crime romance. I was amazed by th realism of the jargon used by the characters. I think a Glock would be too big for Jerrod's back-up weapon.

Nicely done. When your mind latches onto a story idea, you flesh it out and give it life. Top marks. Thanks for sharing.

It was well thought out...well written...well done!

One problem,Vito ! Why wouldn’t he want her out of way after Tony failed to off her. Otherwise great writing. Your one of the best .

Regardless of the id10t from the 16th, a really good story. A good proofreader/editor could have made it better reading, but I see those things because that's what I do. I also don't hide like most anons when I leave a comment, I sign em. I'm not a member, just a reader and sometime proofreader/light editor.

Good work. I liked the way the plot developed without being too complicated , but with enough twists so that we couldn't see too far ahead. 5*

detroitdave

I would like to know what someone like anon 12/16 has read that makes this mediocre. Really good.

Your correct usage of "lay" versus "laid" as the action verb for the MC reclining in the past tense. Thank you.

.

I believe the editing on this story to be very good. The end result would have benefited from a proof read to reenter missing words and proper word usage (past vs passed, dessert vs desert, etc.). It is a pleasure to read your work and I'm sure there are many of us who recognize your striving for improvement - reinforced by your rising scores over the years. Thank you for your efforts!

Keep 'em comin'.

What a great story, one not usually found on Lit. Story line was great and well written. Well done 5 stars

You are an excellent writer. I have really enjoyed everything of yours I have read so far. Please keep creating.

You should be writing novels, too good to be wasting your talents just on here⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Incredibly well written and entertaining story. Five enthusiastic stars.

Excellent. I have enjoyed all your stories which I have read, you have a real talent for creating suspense, and not making your stories predictable. Bravo.

Excellent as always.

Wonderful gripping read.

5 stars!

Excellent and beautiful story. Definitely a five star rating. 🌟👍🌟👍🌟👍🌟👍🌟👍

Great story!

Wish I could give it more than just 5 stars 🌟more than 10 stars 🌟

Wife lied and cheated 5 times. Divorce the bitch...

Dammit your stuff is wayyy too long and takes wayyy too much attention to absorb - and it’s worth every minute

The last two paragraphs sold the story. *****'s Signed: BTW

Do hope you are still writing. A future story correction, perhaps?

“passed” as in “you passed that truck before!” and “past” as in “that is something from your past”.

I get jarred every time you write “passed” when the sentence requires “past” and you consistently, repeatedly, do that.

Your stories are really good and the other spelling errs are not so disrupting, to me.

Thanks again!

Craig

You skillfully unfolded an intriguing plot, with well managed tension. That made it a real “page turner” for sure. I also liked your character development that was largely driven by how they interacted in the unfolding plot. Very well done indeed. Thanks for the time and effort you put in to bring an enjoyable and compelling tale.

P.S. Watch the spelling and word usage. E.g., it’s “past”. Not “.passed”. They do sound the same though

This is a great story. Please continue to write more loving stories.

Just one word: aaawww

5*

This story is one simple proofread away from perfection. While some commenters have legitimate suggestions of tweaks that may strengthen the plot, the only faults I see are with goofs that could be passed (not 'past') off as typos or missed proof points.

Delighted to see a fresh story from LTW, and a fiver as well.

Keep 'em comin'.

Best story on this site. A classic. Suspense, an excellent plot and great characters. Well done.

An undisputed five star story.

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

This would make an excellent movie script.

Brea was the slut.

Cory was an interfering bitch!!

Second time. Still one of the truly great stories here on Lit. You know it’s a good story when the btb crybabies squeal. Wish I could vote again.

another great story for claiming not to be much of writer your sure had me fooled solid five

Excellent story, well written.

I don't usually rate stories... But as oldsofty said... Solid 5... On another note... There are some really crap ass people in this world... And some of them congregate in these comments sections... The world is full of morons... And people thst have absolutely no empathy... SMFH

-jaye-

I am working my way down your alphabetical list. This is another great one. I love happy endings!!

Jim

Well written story as I have come to expect. You are an excellent writer. I really don't like the recon between Morgan and Brea. I don't know how he can ever trust her again. She toyed with a guy and ended up in a hotel room with him. For the rest of his life he will always wonder what she's doing and where she is, and who she's with every time he's not with her.

Not much of a marriage if you ask me.

" For me the only criticism is that some of the scenes between Morg and Brea didn't quite ring true, when Brea was relating what happened with Bob there wasn't the intensity and desperation from Brea that you would expect. She almost related the encounter in an off the cuff manner."

I fully agree with the above quoted criticism. You do write excellent stories but sometimes your reconciliations are a little two dimensional. There needs to be more accountability and more true remorse from the wayward one.

Otherwise another excellent story 5*

How rare a love like yours is?

I know many people who have marriages that don’t have these issues so clearly it’s average at best. I’ll never understand why this trope is used so often in Loving Wives, it never works in any of these stories because everyone knows of the sheer volume of people who never cheat and never consider doing it.