Nadya/Nadia Ch. 07

Nadia forged down the hallway, betrayal fueling her rage and hate. Entering what she had come to think of as her room she stopped short, coming to the sudden realization she was filled to the brim with her magic. And with the return of her magic came clarity.

So, that was how it had to be — to use her magic she had to hate Elijah.

Part of her wanted to cry, but the larger part of her wouldn't allow it. She wanted to run back to him, apologize, tell him she understood why he'd done what he'd done, and what he hadn't, why he'd said the things he had, and let him hold her like he wanted to, but her feet wouldn't take her that way. That would make her weak, and she was not the Weak One.

If she had to hate him to use her magic, she would hate him. Determinedly she tried to ignore the place in her that ached when she made that resolution.

It was more important now than ever before that she leave. Staying here was stifling her, and it was slowly killing Elijah, whether he wanted to see it or not. She'd just left him blamed, beaten, burned, and bloody as a result of doing what she'd demanded and giving her what she needed, and the idiot would let her keep treating him that way because he really did lo—. She stopped the thought before it could complete itself.

She made one slight modification to her escape plan, opened a journal to the page she had marked, and began her preparations. An hour later she was ready. Nadia swallowed the potion she'd made and went to find Elijah.

When she found him, he lifted empty, tired eyes to hers, and asked, "Come to offer me your ass already?"

She straddled him and touched her forehead to his. "How did you do it?"

"I shared the pain I felt when the mages beat me and then I took it away," Elijah replied. "I never struck you. I would never hurt you like that."

"I can't do this," she whispered. "I need hate and rage. I can't give you what you want."

"You are what — "

"I know how to leave."

Elijah closed his eyes. He'd known this was coming but hadn't expected the moment to arrive so soon, and hearing her say the words made it something irrevocable. He wasn't ready. He would never be ready. He wanted to say something but didn't have the words. He opened his mouth anyway, but Nadia put a finger over his lips to silence him.

"I don't have much time, so listen to me." She laid a hand on his cheek and he opened his eyes. She steeled herself against the pain she saw there. "The answers we need aren't here. You can't dissolve the block. I can't take what you want to give me, and I can't give you what you want." Nadia took a deep breath. "But I can give you her. For tonight."

"Nadia — "

"Tonight, don't tell her about the monsters," Nadia said, swallowing hard. "She doesn't need to know about all the things that want to hunt and kill us yet. Just make her happy. She likes dancing, sunflowers, long flowing dresses, junk food and chocolate milk, candlelight, pirate movies, and sunsets. You can be everything I can't accept and let her be everything I can't give you."

"I don't want to argue with you or say..." Nadia cleared her throat. "I already took an elixir to make me sleep. It will take effect in a minute and should last for a few hours. She's the one that will wake up and you won't see me again. When I come out next time, it'll be because we're leaving. I had the incubus. Let her have the man."

He opened his mouth to say something again, but Nadia leaned forward and kissed him. It was a kiss full of everything neither of them wanted to say, everything they couldn't say, and all things that would never be, and it only ended when she collapsed against him.

"Oh, my unruly and wayward witch, don't you know? In all the stories a kiss is what's supposed wake you and start the happily ever after," Elijah whispered.

When Nadya woke she was alone. She suspected time had passed, since the last thing she remembered was Elijah trying to teach her to keep her aura under control, and her reward. Rewardus interruptus, more like.

She stretched, found she was naked and smiled. Some things would never change. A twinge of self-recrimination went through her. The fact that the incubus kept her naked should bother her. She should be ashamed of herself that she just accepted it now.

An envelope on the table with her name in bold script caught her attention and she picked it up, opening the flap to find an invitation.

"You are cordially invited downstairs for an evening of dancing and desserts. Please dress and join me."

She snorted. Dressed. That would be different. And dress in what? Her eyes landed on a garment bag that hung from the closet door. She unzipped it to find a floor length dress in dark blue. She arched an eyebrow and wondered what the incubus was up to now.

After a shower she dried her hair. A glance in the mirror showed her eyes were already done in smokey shadow and black liner. That was the work of the other woman. What had the other woman been up to this time while she'd been unaware? She hadn't given the other woman too much thought since she'd had to acknowledge she wasn't alone in her mind.

Hello? she asked in her mind. There was no answer.

She frowned as she tried to see her silver aura and it wasn't there. Did she have to be around Elijah so she could see it? She didn't like not being able to see it now that she knew about it. It felt like an essential part of her was missing now, even though she'd only just discovered it.

She couldn't manage to zip the dress up completely on her own, so when she was as ready as she could be she went downstairs. The only shoes available were death trap stilettos that matched the dress. She carried them in one hand, sure she would kill herself trying to go down stairs in them.

Elijah waited at the bottom of the stairs. He was also fully clothed for a change, in all black.

As she approached him she turned her back and displayed her half closed zipper. The touch of Elijah's fingers on her skin sent a shiver through her. He leaned forward and placed a kiss on her spine before he slid the zipper closed and spun her gently to face him.

Taking the impossibly high heels from her hand he knelt in front of her. A flash of heat flushed her skin as she remembered the last time he'd knelt in front of her.

Elijah inhaled, his eyes darkened, and a smirk settled on his lips as he scented her sudden arousal. He lifted one of her feet at a time to put her shoes on while she braced herself against his broad shoulders. Rising to his feet he gallantly offered her his arm.

She wrapped her arm in his and let him lead her through the house. He took her to a large room that had tables lining one wall but was otherwise empty of furniture. The tables were full of covered platters, and lit candles flickered among pots, vases, and bouquets of sunflowers.

"What's all this?" Nadya asked. "Are you trying to seduce me?"

"Perhaps," Elijah replied. "Is it working?"

"Perhaps. Do you think at the end of this date of ours that my dress will fall off for a few cupcakes and candles?"

"I intend for your dress to fall off long before the end of this date." He twirled her onto the makeshift dance floor. "I was told there should also be dancing."

"She told you?"

Elijah nodded.

"How does she know so much about me and I don't know anything about her? I didn't even believe she was real. I thought I was going crazy."

Elijah brought her hand to his mouth and kissed her fingers. "She's more aware when you're in control than you are when she is."

"But she doesn't know what's happening to us, either?"

"No, she's been spending a lot of time trying to figure things out, but she hasn't found the answers you need yet. I told her she should start a journal so you two could communicate with each other, but I don't know if she's done that."

Nadya looked up at him. "You really do want to help us."

"I told you I want to."

"A girl's allowed to be suspicious when you start off by meeting her after you've broken in to her apartment and then kidnapped her."

"Fair enough. I'm trying to make up for that, if you'll let me."

Nadya arched an eyebrow at him. "Well, that will depend on what kind of desserts there are." She spun out of his arms and stumbled, irritably kicking off the ridiculous shoes Elijah had just put on her feet so she could walk across the room to the tables. Lifting the covers of each platter she found cookies, cupcakes, pies, tarts, and a variety of small cakes. She turned to him and pouted. "No ice cream?"

He gestured to the end of the table where a small refrigerator/freezer sat on the floor. She opened the freezer and took out the container of ice cream. She held it up and turned to him again. "I thought an incubus would be more adventurous than vanilla."

"An incubus knows it's all about what you can do with vanilla as a base."

Nadya assembled a sampling of everything and walked to Elijah, who was seated at a table for two.

"There seems to be a chair missing," she noted.

Elijah nodded solemnly. "I guess we'll have to share this one."

Nadya let herself be tugged onto his lap. His mouth was on the skin of her back even before she was fully seated. "You're not trying to distract me from my desserts, are you?"

"Absolutely not," Elijah said, trailing kisses up her spine. "Feel free to eat your fill. You'll need your energy for dancing."

When she had had a bite of every dessert, Elijah turned on some music and led her back onto their dance floor. He took her through a samba, the lambada, the kizomba, three different waltzes and ended with a tango. "Keep your arms and back straight," he instructed her as he dipped her parallel to the floor. "Trust me. I won't drop you."

He wished her dress away and moved them outside. He kept lowering her until her back hit the ground and followed her down. She gasped. He'd brought them to a hilltop that overlooked the lake and gave them an excellent view of the sun as it was setting.

He placed a trail of kisses on her skin as he moved down her body.

"How come only my clothes were lost in transit?"

"I want to watch the sunset on your skin," Elijah replied.

"So I have to be naked in the snow? It's freezing out here!"

"Do you feel cold?"

Nadya realized she didn't. "No."

"As long as I'm touching you, you won't feel the cold."

Nadya arched an eyebrow. "How very convenient for you."

Elijah smirked. "If you'd rather be cold..."

"No," Nadya said quickly. "I like it here outside. But if I have to be naked, so do you. That's only fair." She tugged at his shirt.

Elijah obligingly wished his clothes away.

"To stay warm I have to touch you, and you can make me do whatever you want."

"That's not true."

"Yes, it is."

"I could make you do only what you wanted to do anyway. I could never make you do something you truly didn't want to."

"How can I believe that?"

"Flutterby," Elijah said.

Nadya crossed her arms over her head and spread her legs. "See?" she demanded.

"Did you hear what I said?"

"Of course I did, that's how you make me do this."

"What did I say?"

"You said butterfly"

"No, I didn't."

"You did! You said —" Nadya stopped. "You said flutterby."

Elijah nodded.

"Why did I do this?"

"It was the only way you could accept the pleasure I offered you. Mordecai had his own compulsions on you, and until they were gone the only way you could act against them was if you thought you had no choice."

*****

Elijah felt it the moment Nadya left his arms and he was holding Nadia instead. He knew what it meant. She was leaving. He fought the urge to grab her and try to force her to stay. But he couldn't force her to do anything anymore, and even if he could, it wouldn't mean anything if he forced her, so he let his arms remain limp and didn't move as Nadia extricated herself from his embrace. She placed a hand on his chest over his heart and said, "Sleep."

The urge to fall into a deep sleep was hard to resist but he managed to, barely. He would take these last moments with his witches even if it was only to watch them leave him. He relaxed his body and focused on slowing his breathing and pulse, but he felt her gaze on him. It was a struggle not to open his eyes, to stop himself from looking into her face one last time. Just as he was going to give in and open his eyes the bed shifted and the sheets rustled as she moved away from him and went to the closet. He was only just able to hold back a grin as she huffed at her clothing options.

Nadia knew she didn't have much time. She'd compelled Elijah to sleep, and while her magic was at the highest levels it had been in days, she still only knew how to compel him with his own kind of magic, and he'd be able to fight that off soon.

He'd always said when she could leave he wouldn't stop her, but that was before she'd let him have his dream with Nadya. She'd taken it away from him once already as punishment for mistreating her, but she thought this was actually much crueler — to have let him have half the dream. She suspected the larger part of the dream was not the act of a woman choosing to be with him, so much as the acknowledgement that she remembered making the choice, and she was taking that away from him. Would it hurt to stay until he woke and tell him they remembered?

She rebuked herself immediately. The Weak One's sappiness was getting in the way of her getting them out of here. Wait until he woke. Wait a few more hours. Wait another another day. It would never end.

She got off the bed, crossed the room to the closet, and blew out a breath at her clothing choices. Thanks to Mordecai, Nadya had terrible taste in clothes and she didn't mind leaving these behind. They would need a whole new wardrobe, but for now she just needed warm clothes so she would have to make do. She dressed in layers and put on hiking boots. Last time she had put them on to leave that hadn't worked out so well. This time would be different.

All she knew about where they were was that there was a lake, a mountain, a forest, and there was snow on the ground. She examined the selection of her jackets. Pitiful. She looked at the other side of the closet and examined Elijah's jackets. Better. She selected the most expensive looking one — a soft, black leather jacket with a hood. She put it on and looked at herself in the mirror mounted on the back of the closet door. It would be thigh length on Elijah's tall frame, but on her it covered her knees. She pulled the hood over her head and tried to look menacing and mysterious. Okay, probably leave that for the incubus, but she was keeping the jacket.

She refused to glance back and missed the wistful green gaze that watched her as she crossed the room to the locked door that led out of the bedroom. She smiled at how naive she'd been when he'd first brought them here, and how highly entertaining it must have been for him to watch her search the room for a key that didn't exist. He'd told them from the beginning how to get out — as long as you think you can't, you never will. She still didn't have a key, but she was a witch. She didn't have all her power yet, but 'can't' was more and more a thing of her past. She twisted the knob, and the door opened. The lock re-engaged as she shut the door behind her.

She went into her room and debated what she wanted. Something in the chair caught her attention. A backpack. Elijah. He'd said she could take anything she wanted. She picked up the backpack and found it was already packed with some things. A bottle of water, an assortment of junk food, and a thermos. She unscrewed the lid. Chocolate milk.

She was tempted to take the journals, but they would become too heavy to fast. She wasn't sure how far she'd have to go to be able to get in touch with Ember.

How fast would they forget this place and Elijah? Would having something of his mother's help them to keep their memory? Maybe something of his? She settled on the journal she'd started for herself, and the ring that had called to her with the silver band and green stone. She picked up the ring and slid it onto her finger, peering at it closely. For a second she thought she saw a shadow roil across the green stone, but when she stared at the ring and it didn't reappear she dismissed it as a trick of shadows.

She was turning to leave when she saw the crumpled t-shirt Elijah had tried to dress her in before her magic had gone crazy. Before she could think about it too much she scooped the t-shirt up and stuffed it into the backpack.

Ready to leave now, she went to the front door, and pulled it open. A brief flicker at her fingertips and the wards that were keeping her trapped in the house blinked once and went out in a silver flash.

She concentrated on seeing Elijah's green wards and slowly they materialized in front of her. She gently nudged them, moving them just enough so she could make her way between them. There were so many layers and they were so intricate it was pain-staking work, but she persevered and finally edged through the last one.

As she stepped past the final ward her body shook as a wave of magic washed over her.

"Where are you?" Ember's voice was clear in her mind.

"I don't know. At a house by a lake somewhere. There's a big mountain behind the lake."

"You got past the wards. I can feel you now."

"I just escaped."

"Escaped? Are you in danger?"

Nadya frowned. Why had she said escaped? She had just walked out the door, hadn't she? "No, I don't think so. It doesn't look like anyone else is here, and no one is chasing me. I need transportation, there aren't any cars here."

"Tell me what's around you. I'm gathering my surori."

"What's a surori?" Nadia asked.

"My sisters."

"There's a large lake behind the house. It's a two story house in the middle of a forest. I'm not near the city. I can't see any other buildings at all. I don't see a driveway, but maybe if I can find a road someone will help me."

"Stay where you are as long as no one is after you and there isn't any danger. My surori are here. We're going to try and find you. Can you show us where you are? Turn in a circle, slowly, and let me see through your eyes. Myth will try and seek you."

"See through my eyes? How is that possible? Who's Myth? Your surori?"

"Myth is one of my surori, yes. We need you to close your eyes and focus on my voice, on the connection between us. When you find it, I'm going to push some of my magic to you. You need to accept it so when you open your eyes I can see what you see. It might hurt a bit, since you're not part of our sabat, but it's the fastest way for us to find you."

Feeling far from certain, but knowing she had no better option at the moment, and desperately wanting to connect with a woman that was like her, Nadya closed her eyes, took a breath, and focused on Ember's voice. She felt Ember pushing magic to her. It stung, not at all like the last times he had shared magic with her. Who had done that? Another witch? Did she know another witch? She opened her eyes. Her vision was blurry and her eyes burned. Instinctively she closed them.

"No, Nadya. It was working. Show us where you are."

Nadia didn't bother correcting Ember about her name. She would explain later. She opened her eyes again. They still burned, but she held them open as she slowly turned in a circle. There was nothing but forest around her.

"That's good. Myth found you. Don't move."

Nadya blinked furiously, trying to stop her eyes burning. "I think someone's here," she said in a near panicked voice. "I feel scared."

"Don't worry. We're with you." This time her voice wasn't in Nadia's head. She whirled. Five women with straight black hair and shining silver eyes were standing behind her. Dressed highly inappropriately for the weather, they were all barefoot and wore simple, short white sleeveless dresses that left little to the imagination and couldn't possibly provide any warmth.