All Comments on 'Naked Girl on the Island'

Till the last sentence.

4

Could have been a great story

Romance ruined by polyamory. 1 star

Good story, but not sure you needed the revenge bit. Loved adding Celeste.

Polyamory, good.

Revenge, good.

Loved the story. Thank you for sharing it.

Liked everything until the revenge. They got what they deserved but, story would have been better without it. Took it from 5* to 4*.

Good story!

5

You write very well, and the romance was wonderful. I almost dropped to 4 because I personally don’t believe in revenge, but it was your story to tell, and you did an excellent job. So, 5 stars from me.

T.

Agree with other comments. I liked the romance. There were a lot of directions it could have developed into. In my mind it went down hill pretty quickly. Bringing in Celeste seemed abrupt. Then the revenge made Louise who was already a bad ass into a ruthless torturer. No thanks.

I don't give 5 unless the story is excellent. While good, it has a lot of mistakes that should have been caught. Nice story, and those whosa they don't believe in revenge are liars and full of bullshit. This seems to be common now.

I liked it, but think you have the talent to do better.

Not a bad story, writing needs to be tightened up a bit. As for those complaining about the revenge being a bad thing, I ask where they misplaced their balls

30 million became 1 million

Etc

.3 Stars

jtwheels

a great story. I like it a lot. AAA+++

Not a bad story but had alot of flaws. The rapid arranged marriage was odd to say the least. Celeste joining their bedroom dynamic was bothersome, and not so sure about keeping the rapist's baby. The revenge was interesting, very very uncomfortable but interesting. Can't say the rapists didn't deserve it either. I think the story went too fast and with too many players to be really romantic but otherwise a fine story that I gave a 4.

Her captors finally got their due. She ended up with a wonderful, loving husband and at least one child. Most of all, she was loved.

Well written story, different but well written. The rapist got there comeuppance and Louise, Celese and Lance got the happily ever after which was a nice ending. 5/5

it wasn't a particularly well thought-out story. Along with amounts changing, etc., there is no way that louise, having been jilted for her cousin at the alter would then give her cousin to her new husband... it makes no sense!

Pretty good until the last pages. Fell into an unbelievable immature fantasy. 2*

I got bored with it after I was half-way through the second page. Just too implausible. I know it is fiction and some supension-of-belief is necessary, but the start was just too contrived. Not saying you should stop writing, do continue, I just that I did not like the way this tale started. Good Luck.

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Pasqual

Started good. Second part, last couple of pages, nope. Bad.

Started good and could have been better if Louise wasn’t so mentally unstable and there wasn’t that weird arranged marriage thing.

It could have been so much better if he had helped her recover and grew to love each other over time instead of what it was.

I am guessing the author started to get bored with the story at the end and created that weird out of place vigilante story.

You are a wonderful writer that sees into people and arranges clever narratives and intriguing characters with flaws and redeeming qualities. Thank you so much for your work.

when louise's mother "went lesbian" I had to stop. incel writing.

[08.02.24]

Fun and Sexcellente!

11/10!!!!!

Hey @brunnzl

Just because a writer writes a story where a woman 'goes Lesbian' it is NOT an indication that they are an 'incel' - it is a maybe not so common in this day and age occurence where a previous 'straight' married woman leaves her husband for another woman, three off the top of my head are Meredith Baxter who married 3 men then married a woman the 4th time in 2013, Anne Heche who was married 2x to men then almost married Ellen Degeneres - then was in a relationship with another man, and finally Wanda Sykes 1st married to a man then a woman.

And it goes without saying, it also goes the same way for men - of which Joel Grey is a good example.

So nothing about 'incelitis' here.