All Comments on 'Near Ending Of Mankind'

Good beginning!

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5* Thank you for posting this in LW (rather than sci-fi where I wouldn't have seen it). It's well-written and flows smoothly with some nice twists and turns. The interplay between the main characters is believable in the world you have created. You also set up the co-operative so well that I am worried that the coming national government might not be a good thing. Thank you again.

Very well done 5*. Thank u. Ur story was well written and ur characters weren well developed..

Damned good story!! You should write more like this.

Good story and interesting read. I guess you could say Rob was a "Hot Husband" since he was being shared between 3 wives and lets not forget his "treatment" for all the women patients he was asked to provide to keep harmony in the female dominate community for those women not attached to any male. Since women living together have a tendency to synchronize their monthly cycles "that time of the month" must of been interesting for Rob. I'm sure he found a lot to keep him at the hospital and out of the house around that time of the month.

Very entertaining read, pure fantasy that these women could all share one guy happily, but it's fiction. One question, tho, about so many folks dying- why didn't they just don their masks, like Dr. Fauci said? Ha!

wow what would it have been if more men and less women? good story.

Hahahaha! Yes, this is fiction, but it’s so absurd! The tech level would drop very low before they could build it back up. Because of male physical strength, men would be in charge, even with a larger number of women survivors. The only way a gynarchy would exist is at a very high tech level, even higher than our own (robots doing the manual labor that men do now), or a much more severe sex imbalance, 10 women to one man or more.

Also, there would be a lot more jealousy among the women. The description of women in leadership is hilarious. Women are deceptive, and cruel. This would be a dystopian society, not the cooperative utopia described.

ZK

Pretty good. You started to wander a bit in the middle, but a strong finish pulled you back up to an overall 5*.

Great story!

A good story and well told!

Boring. Just mind numbingly boring.

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2 **

Thanks for the effort. It is obviously difficult for an artistically inclined person to make much bio/technical sense about a large loss of human beings. You pretty much left out the logical analysis of your basic premise, the large scale demise of the population. Why would there being fewer people lead to a diminishing of technology and civilized organization and behavior? Apparently hydroelectric and nuclear power still generated electricity, still pumped oil and natural gas, still powered machines that produced food, material, vehicles, etc. And you never mentioned Anything about the animal population. Carnivores would have had endless supplies of food for months. Domestic animals would be in vast abundance for the remaining population, and most agricultural practices have low energy methods and techniques for food production. The remaining 5% of the world population would simply regroup into smaller communities, identify their available resources, and begin the process of restoring society and repopulating the earth. Yeah, not the aesthetic approach you illustrated, but the practical outcome of the scenario you created. It was mildly interesting. Thanks for the effort.

Very good. Makes one think after reading news articles about Boston College doing research and coming up with a COVID type virus that had an 80% fatality rate among mice who were barely affected by the original COVID19 virus.

I appreciate your efforts and am trying to come up with some 'constructive criticism' but having a hard time doing so. I guess the only thing I can say is that it might be a little emotionless. Anyway this is by far may favorite story of the past month or so.

RSKY54

Very well written and a great story. It just flowed.

I always like a post apocalyptic tale. I guess they don’t all have to be dystopian.

~Spiny

Great story! I'm reminded of a series from the late 70s, early 80s, called "The Survivalist" by the late Jerry Ahern. Lots of similarities. I hope you have more in store, to the point of making this short story a novel.

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Good story messed up by not proofing it.

Get Grammarly, languagetool or hemmingway to help you.

Thanks for sharing and putting in LW, I too wouldn't have found it in Sci-fi.

Reads a bit like what happened on land in the 1st couple of seasons of the Last Boat.

As well written as any "men vastly outnumbered by women" scenario story I've seen...

Nicely done!

Dayum. I'm glad that ended up in LW. That's just a great story with good balance. Not excessively detailed in a good way. Has a great flow and some suspense.

unrated

Clearly nowhere close to LW. Pretty sure that the closest were the 2, (then 3?) ladies ganging up on Hubby, but they were a married threesome (or foursome)!

Small detail! When did Sweetie1 put her wedding ring on her sister’s finger?

Pretty well written and flowed well....yet it reads like a man hating 'woke' publicity piece. Women are cruel and catty and jealous by and large. Remember "bitches be crazy!" And....anything that bleeds for 7 days and doesn't

die is the devils spawn! I'm old and get away with this stuff! (sic). 5* Looking forward to the finale.

Turned out much better for him than “A Boy and His Dog”.

As to the commune, review the Pilgrims experience on that subject.

Thank you! This isn't the comment I'm sure you were hoping to get, but it's all I can offer at this time. Anything else would be to get you to change your story into mine, and that's not called for. Thank you.

Probably shouldnt start a story with something that sounds like the completely brain dead idiocy of the Qanon Maga cult...because that really makes you look as fucking intellectually backwards as they are.

Not a bad story though, unless you are literally what I described, be slightly more careful next time, if you are get help, it'll take decades but shoe tying is a possiblility.

I liked it! Everything that happened seemed plausible and believable.

4-stars. Only because of the errors in grammar, the concept and originality of the story were 5-stars. It did read a little like 'The Last Ship'. It really was a Sci-Fi more than a LW, but I'm glad you put it into this category. Great story. It seems you write in starts and stops, writing 3 or 4 stories then going silent. Hopefully we will see your writing continue a little more consistently. Thanks for entertaining us.

If this had been buried in the Sci-Fi section I probably would have missed it. Now I have to look for other Easter Eggs hidden in that section. As a younger reader of Sci-Fi I often had a teacher telling me that I should read the better books but it was the impossible or improbable that let me use my imagination and this story did that to a T. Others might feel that the outcome would be different then in this world but it belongs to this author and if you disagree then, please write about the world you envision and pick a category to post it in for others to read and consider. I had at least two other past tales fighting to be compared with this story and will have to search my memory to them to allow for a fair comparison test. A dispassionate proof reader would find most of the minor faults other seem to be upset over but for me they were just a slight skip on a sidewalk crack.

Now, do I go to the Sci-Fi section or check for other pearls that Serendipity has submitted.

7 billion people are hideously dead and civilization has collapsed. Things have never been better.

A good fantasy read. A couple of comments: 1) the commune state of a fledgling population was tried before with the Pilgrims and failed. It took private property rights and free enterprise to make it work. 2) when things go bad like the situation in this story, it's the engineers who are worth their weight.

Every man's fantasy 3 willingly women.. Now, I await the conflict that most come.

Nice start 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

Outstanding job. A post apocalyptic story that doesn't degenerate into a string of harrowing experiences for the survivors. I think the massive loss experienced by the males is why this story works because the MC is not your normal douche asshole. Would have loved to here more about the navy forces and the reestablishment of some kind of government. Its always fun to play in a new sandbox.

Excellent

Well done

An amazing story. Far fetched and believable. I found it absorbing. I found myself being drawn into the situation. Thanks for writing a truly original work.

Very nice story...with room for a sequel. Please consider continuing! I would love to see everything in-between and after your ending! Well done, spelling and grammar not withstanding...5 Stars!

Nicely done; I agree with others who have commented about your needing an editor. Don't be too upset, though. Almost all the writers in Literotica have the same problem. After all, it is a free site, and many, if not most, of the writers are in learning mode. If the rule 'you get what you pay for' were truly inflexible, then this site would be far worse. We can truly be thankful for the privilege of enjoying a great many diamonds in the rough. Thank you for your contribution. lp;w

Not really that far fetched. China is a self serving and power hungry government. It is only the might of the U S military that keeps it at bay. Now we have a dementia patient that gets taken for walks on the white house lawn as President. What could possibly go wrong. Covid was just the start. If the W.H.O is not replaced with a body that will not be swayed by money and influence. This story could very well become a reality.

Very enjoyable. Good post-viral-apocalypse world you've created, easy to visualize, and thankfully sparing us zombies, gangs, and other violent distractions. Human beings coping and adapting and connecting make for a good story in your capable hands. Am looking very forward to reading more of your writing. Thanks for sharing!!

reconnected the electricity grid

What grid?

Nice idea around end of world but the only way it ends is with tribes violently opposing each other. Strength would be only thing that is respected.

Very enjoyable story. If anyone would like to read an old post apocalyptic novel, the first one I read was called “Earth Abides” by the author George R. Stewart, written back in the 1949. .

Huh?!

Excellent five star story. Add an antagonist or two and this would make a wonderful futuristic novel.

I must agree with the Huh? comment.

I look forward to the proffered second chapter/part. Very good story well constructed and written definitely 5 stars

Story line was well thought out. Pleased that society returned to some level of trust and safety. 5*s.

"she was wearing the wedding ring I had given her."

Yet she turned up alive?

I stopped reading at that point.

Nice story though more sci-fi than LW.

A great survival story.

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Write a sequel

Well done

I read the story and loved it not minding the some of the other comments. I must say though that it really does remind me of an old Isaac Assmenof (not sure of the spelling) about a man made virus that killed 50% of the world’s women and they had to share men and all of the social difficulties of all that was involved with that. I personally would like to see stories of this kind here.

Thank you most readable and enjoyable, only gripe, he did not choose his wives they chose him. {and] I have no problem with that.

I know that it's about sex. But loosing 95% population - who will run factories to produce power, water stations, heating, producing various tools and machines, medicaments, clothese and so on and so on.

We can forget about coffe and bananas and drive old cars for few decades but thats all.

5 Stars on a good read . Keep up the good work

First of all, a really good story. Thank you for the effort creating it and sharing. 5 stars.

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Second, I'm a bit curious why "female dominant" tag? While the community seemed led by females, the main characters were not in any way in femdom or even D/s relationships. Not that I'm complaining since ironically (double ironically since I'm a nearly 100% dominant male, and almost never read femdom stories), I found this one by sorting that "female dominant tag" by ratings :-P

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@anon - there's many classic SciFi stories with similar premise, my favorite is probably Day of the Triffids.

I loved the storey. It was great. AAAAAA++++++

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