All Comments on 'Neighborhood Dad Ch. 03'

by LittleHenry

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  • 16 Comments
oldnornryoldnornryover 10 years ago
disappointment

All that buildup and no action. Every Dad has had the opportunity and chickened out.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
Good Start

I like the buildup of these three chapters but I much say I'm almost impatiently awaiting for more physical contact. I know there was a longer gap before this chapter was entered but maybe we could have a multiple page story that involves some more physical engagement?

Sidney43Sidney43over 10 years ago

Hard to believe this story does not have more comments. Nicely written and a good slow build up. I am thinking about the old line that goes something like this. A woman lets a man believe that he is the one doing the chasing and catching.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
Eh

Would be nice if the story moved a long at a faster pace

HeyeseyHeyeseyover 10 years ago
Excellent

I imagine a lot of readers are expecting the action to start a lot faster. Normally, I would be. But this is a fantastic piece of work as it is; frankly, so far, it reads like it's worthy of a lot wider audience than just an adult-stories website. Keep up the good work.

Boredstiff63Boredstiff63over 10 years ago
Not bad so far

I like the build up and setting the scene ...time for some action! Great job keep em coming

100dreams100dreamsover 10 years ago
Please keep going

I am really enjoying the slow pace and the teasing inevitability at play here. I really can't wait to see what happens next, but I will. Please don't stop.

HamsterHamsterover 10 years ago
On One Pagers

I kind of like the pace of these one page wonders. We get some character development instead of hot sex, but one of the one pagers will get there. I am in no hurry.

unhealthyviewinghabitsunhealthyviewinghabitsover 10 years ago
LIKE!

I really like this story. Engaging and its not all about lust. You have given the father depth and morals but still made him engaging and sexy.

Randi isn't vapid and well stacked only but has a brain and exercises it. An old soul in a young body.

I don't want to make assumptions but I so like the way this love story is playing out without the cliches of a horny teenager and amoral father who suddenly want to get horizontal with each other. These are three dimensional characters we are beginning to care about and I say THANKS for a great story.

Now I have one request.. PLEASE DON'T ABANDON IT and leave it unfinished as that is truly frustrating. When I get engaged in the characters, I want to see it all through from buildup to climax to denouement so I can be immersed in their world and emotions and find it satisfying.

Thanks for the great read!

Spider1Spider1over 10 years ago

You're doing fine, but I concur that the next scene demands some sex.

ramonbrookramonbrookover 10 years ago
Yep , you are a rockstar of the buildup!

Can't wait to read more about Randi and Mr. D!

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
More Please

I log on every day just to check if the next chapter has been loaded

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
Pacing is perfect, but

Seeing as they're only one page each, can you get them out a little faster?

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
keep the story going

please keep the story going.Love to see where it goes

rightbankrightbankalmost 10 years ago
three chapters in

and the posters are still saying

"nice start"

cute only stretches so far.

but that could be because the chapters are not even one full page each.

Prolonged_Debut10Prolonged_Debut10over 7 years ago
One Sentence

Did not save a poor chapter.

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userLittleHenry@LittleHenry
Little Henry is a Southerner who is bored with writing lame magazine articles and wants to have some fun for a change. His fiction writing ranges far and wide from these erotic stories, an attempt at "the great American novel" and even a children's book.

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