All Comments on 'Nephele and Faye'

Superb writing; gut wrenching, heartfelt romantic storyline around two real, 3-dimensional characters. Thanks for the happy ending. Although I suspect you have no more to share about the two war worn lovers, I would love it if you did. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Jackie: Nelly let me know this was coming and how good it was. The exuberance was not in vain, thanks for a wonderful story!!

Wonderful story. I am glad you ended it on a happy note.

So well written, such a moving, well crafted story. Wishing I had extra stars. Thanks for sharing your beautiful story.

Wheeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwww. You know why.

Loved this. Thanks for writing a really good one.

What can I say? This overwhelmingly beautiful story has left me breathless. I had quite a debate with myself wondering what genre to place this in: science fiction wasn't quite right, speculative fiction probably. In the end I decided it was a world similar to our own but existing in some parallel universe (you mention being influenced by a game--I'm not a gamer so can't really comment on that). You also illustrated very well that the good guys aren't always so good and the bad guys aren't always so bad. And for your protagonists, Nephele and Faye, one can only hope a peaceful and loving life. You say in your afterword about comments/feedback helping make you a better writer. Jackie, you are there already and I can only hope to see more of your work soon.

Loved your eclectic music selection in the afterword.

Absolutely brilliant, just the right pace and kept me absorbed to the end.

🙏🙏🙏

I think I fell in love with your characters. Faye and Neph are so well written that they felt like real people.

I swear I never gave up hope. That somehow Nephele survived and made her way to the farmhouse. That when Faye returned for Noah, Nephele would be waiting because it was the safest place for her.

Thank you for the great story and unforgettable characters. I'm looking forward to more of your work and I'm now going back to your catalogue to see if I've missed anything.

Wow! There are a lot of good writers on Lit. There are a lot of good storytellers. There are some stories that knock a reader back with a Truth, though Lit is not a place where most people would expect any of that, or visit because they wouldn't be caught dead reading "that disgusting filth."

Their loss.

This story is amazing, and you are an amazing writer.

Amazing storytelling. Held my breath as a read a few times. Thank you for sharing.

I know it's not especially helpful to simply wax effusive about how great this work is. So ...

The characterizations were excellent, though maybe Regan was a little over the top, at least without showing us a little about where his rage comes from. Without it, he seemed a bit too much like a super hero villain that is a villain because he's a villain.

I would also suggest offering a little bit more information on Faye's history. She felt like she might be a little too motivated in life over just one event (Eli's death). A life led up to that obsession. Why?

And I was expecting to hear more about the inevitability of Neph's situation. Why did she want so much to be a pilot that she would sacrifice what sounded like a meaningful life of music? Were her parents not happy with her choosing music?

And even though video games scenarios are rarely deep and thoughtful, it's really good place to grab a basic "situation" into which you fit your own story to *make* it deep and thoughtful. I know that a few violent video games to try to make the subtle point, if you play enough, that violence itself really has no point, but I'm afraid the appeal of the "safe" violence of video games effectively hides that message; fun easily overrides sensibility in those audiences. But your story was not too subtle and the message was not lost in the "good" parts of the story. Excellent.

Craft-wise? Wow. Almost perfect. Any good writer is an obsessive editor as well. But I do not remember dropping into editor mode once in this story. Rare.

To me So many similes appear like "Frankie goes to Hollywood - War what is he good for, absolutely nothing ....." or there will be nether a winner in a war, only family's friends and so loosing beloved ones or war is just a dumb power EGO game or just name it

So yeah love can jump over fences and this is old knowledge ...... happily your head acts have become lucky and can hopefully enjoy this love

It was a tale so old as humans being are and so actual as we can follow on a news report

That's the most tragically with it that we don't learn a bit

Sorry for being so philosophical but I'm truly sadden by our behavior

This was a fine war romance with the so needed Happy End .... thank you for letting me smile

Excellent story. There are not nearly enough good romance stories against the backdrop of war. I like how you balanced the description of the love story with the tragedy of the war unfolding around them. This gave the feeling of a microcosm where they existed.

The details of the fictional countries and their fictional conflict was well done. It gave just enough insight without distracting from the main story.

5 stars.

Superb stuff!

You know a story good when completing it is more important than sleep

Fk, I wept at the end..

definitely top drawer story. brilliant portrayal of characters, good tension and great ending. I wish all wars had a happy ending or maybe never started. I guess as long as man controls money and there is avarice there will always be wars.

I didn’t expect such a moving story in this web site. Congratulations for a very well written story line. I am sure many conflicts past and current can be identified in this presentation. Pity few have such good endings.

Made me think, made me cry, made me dream - what more can you want from a story?

I liked how you handled the war, not to judge, not to moralize, not too much in the foreground, just enough to show how much impact it has on the story and the characters. I was really drawn to Neph and Faye, to see and understand them, to feel with them. Maybe they fell in love a bit too quickly, but maybe that is war and two souls yearning for companionship. The sappy romantic in me would have liked a bit more happy times at the end for them ;)

Wonderful story, thank you!

L.

I actually can't think of words that would do this story justice. I'll just send you a big ❤️ and say thank you.

Wonderful1

too good story for romantics, you got us wepingin the end. before the happy end that's it.

Piano included :😃

Well this was simply amazing, I genuinely felt heartbroken reading the 'supposed ending's, and wow... What an ending it was. You have such an incredible way with words, I honestly feel engrossed as a reader. I cannot wait to see what you're going to gift us with next ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Great story,!

Brilliantly told!

Thank you

Bravo. Compelling. I read this several months ago and was left wrung-out, unable to articulate anything meaningful after finishing it. I serendipitously ran across it again today and somehow found it even more gripping than the first time I read it. Still, however, unable to do it justice.

What a gift it is to us the readers.