New Frontier

Grant put his hand on my shoulder.

"You need to do what you can to make sure he's not pushing himself. No strenuous activity of any kind. He doesn't just have to heal, he needs to grow a uterus. Take care of him."

I nodded solemnly.

We talked some more until I heard a moan come from Shannon. Immediately I rushed to him. I saw his beautiful brown eyes open.

"Did...did it...work?" His voice was so faint.

I wanted to cry.

"It worked perfectly, baby. You're fine. We're together."

I saw a trace of a smile on his lips.

I made sure to take care of him for the rest of the day, and by the next morning he was able to function normally on his own. He wasn't a particularly active person anyway, so the healing process wasn't much of an adjustment for him. The only real difference was in how much he ate.

Normally Shannon took in a fraction of the food I did, but now he matched my intake, maybe even surpassed it. He also drank water like he was dying of thirst every minute of the day. Thankfully he stuck to mostly healthy foods, only indulging every so often, which was easily made up for with all the calories that building a womb made his body burn. Even with eating as much as he was, he lost six pounds in those two weeks. He was really enjoying himself.

"Shit, are we sure there aren't any other body parts I can grow? I got my tonsils removed, why don't we get those back?"

I knew he was joking, but I couldn't bring myself to laugh.

It turned out to be a bit of an adjustment for both of us to swear off alcohol, Shannon especially. He wasn't an alcoholic by any means, but he enjoyed a glass of wine at the end of the day quite a bit. Even so, he endured.

What was harder was not having sex.

He and I would normally make love at least every other day, often more than that, and having to go from that to not even being able to masturbate for two weeks was a challenge for him. It must have been even worse than I thought, because his body couldn't hold it in. On more than one occasion I'd wake up to him humping me subconsciously. There was this one night towards the end of it where I couldn't go to sleep that I heard him sigh happily. After some more sighing and moaning I was able to piece together that he was having a sex dream. Out of curiosity I sat back to get a better look.

My husband looked so hot laying there, lost in his dreams.

After a few minutes he bit his lip and moaned out in his sleep.

"Val!"

His dick erupted without even being touched and the sight almost made me come myself. I cleaned up his mess, trying to not wake him. Once I was done with that I went to the bathroom to rub one out really quick. Neither of us mentioned it the next day.

Eventually the time came for us to check back in with the clinic. To his credit, Grant was completely professional and respectful about the manner, even asking me if I wanted to do the test under his instruction, but I told him not to worry about it. He was there during the surgery, he knew everything inside and out. There was the normal stuff, blood pressure and iron checks, but then we had to get down to the nitty gritty. Very gently Grant put his finger inside Shannon, like he was doing a prostate exam. Eventually he moved on to tools and found what he was looking for after probing around for a moment. Whatever he touched made my husband jump a bit.

"Fuck!"

Grant removed his tool and grinned.

"Your healing has gone splendidly! You guys are ready to start conception."

"If it's going to feel like that the whole time I don't know if I'll make it," Shannon breathed. I laughed.

Grant left and came back with a small case.

"These are the muscle relaxants Marlena and I formulated. Be careful, they're potent."

I looked in the box and saw about a dozen little pills.

"Are you sure he's going to need these?"

"I certainly wouldn't recommend going without them. His body is being pushed as it is."

"Val, it's fine," Shannon told me, now on his feet. "We can trust Grant."

"I know, it's just..."

"What, strange? This is where it's starting to get weird for you?"

He definitely had a point there.

Grant spoke up before we were out the door.

"Before you two leave I wanted to thank both of you for putting so much trust in us. It's an honor that we've earned such faith from the two of you. Means a lot." He had such a genuine smile when he said that, too.

That was a little shocking to hear. Before then I had seen him as sort of a detached genius. He was intelligent, but still off in his own little word. But it turned out that he was a lot more in tune and perceptive than I gave him credit for.

"No problem, Grant."

*****

My checkup was first thing in the morning, and I spent the entire following day getting ready for sex with Val. I was more excited for this than I had been for anything since at least our wedding. It wasn't just that we were finally making love after two weeks, but we were going to be creating a child together.

I showered, shaved, douched, even put on a full face of makeup. I'm normally fine with just throwing on some tinted moisturizer and mascara, but today I went for the full glam. This was a big event.

I'm also not much of a cook, but I whipped up some pasta for us. Dinner and candles were laid out when Val finally got back from work. He kissed me passionately.

"You look gorgeous, sweetie."

Dinner was nice, but we definitely rushed through it, both of us eager for the main event. The moment the dishes were in the sink we wanted to start. Nervously, I took one of the pills Grant had supplied us. Suddenly I felt Val's gigantic body behind me.

"While we're waiting for that to do its thing," he purred in my ear, "let's get warmed up, shall we?"

"That sounds wonderful, babe."

He picked me up and lifted me clear off the ground, carrying me to our bedroom. He set me down on the bed gently before taking off his clothes.

No matter how many times I see it I can't help but marvel at Val's body. He was huge, built, hairy in all the right places. He was also hung like a horse. We never measured it, but by my estimation it was nine inches, easy. He filled me up in a way I never even knew was possible.

With so much care and gentleness he took off all my clothes. He kissed tenderly all over my body and it felt like I was melting. Over the minutes my body felt warmer and warmer until I realized that this was more than just arousal. That pill was having the same sort of effect the poppers had when I tried them years ago. I felt warmer, more relaxed. My rock-hard erection softened to being not stiff, but just as filled out and even more sensitive. I felt the sort of high in my ass pussy. I was ready.

"Val," I sighed. "I need you in me. Please knock me up!"

He touched my hole and it was probably the softest it had ever been right out the gate. It was loose like it had just been fucked for hours.

"Holy crap," Val marveled. "You really are ready."

He lubed up, though with how loose and wet I was he probably didn't need to, and began pushing his giant dick into me with ease.

It was so stimulating that it legitimately hurt. It felt like my entire being had just orgasmed and was really sensitive to touch. I was torn between wanting him to stop and wanting more.

"Babe, slow down."

He complied and moved at a crawl. Even so it felt like it took no time at all for him to fully sheathe himself. For the very first time I almost wished he was even bigger.

He fucked me and I felt it with every cell in my body. It did hurt, but that pain almost added to the pleasure. As the minutes passed I felt myself wanting it harder and rougher. I kept telling him to speed up and before long he was fucking me with everything he had.

Eventually he had to stop or he would come. He needed to save that seed.

Slowly and gently he probed around me with his cock until he found the entrance to my new womb. I can't really describe what it felt like. He had gotten to my second gate before, and this sort of felt like that, but also way more intense. It was like I was orgasming without any release. It was painful, but I wanted that pain. I needed it.

"Fuck me hard, Val. Plant that seed deep."

He began moving.

"Damn, Shannon. This part is really tight. It feels great."

In and out, over and over again he fucked my new inner pussy. Now I was thankful that I took those muscle relaxers. Taking him up my ass was effortless, but even as loose as I was this part felt like I was getting fisted. Tears stung my eyes and pleasure bolted through me.

Eventually he sped up.

"I'm about to put a baby in you. Get ready for it."

I nodded, moving with him. A few thrusts later he shot in me and it made me come so hard I saw stars. I could barely breathe.

Val didn't slow down. He kept thrusting, trying to push his seed as deep inside me as he could. After a minute more he collapsed, completely exhausted.

I was the first one to talk after a while.

"I love you."

He kissed me.

"I love you too, babe. That was some of the best sex of my life."

"Same here."

He pulled his softening member out of me and rolled off. It was a few more minutes before I spoke again.

"How deep in was my second hole?"

Val shrugged. "Three, maybe four inches inside you? I wasn't really trying to measure it."

"That's hard to believe. It felt like you were two feet up my guts."

He laughed. "Well if that's the case I think my sperm is deep enough to do its job."

It felt weird to hear him say that. Normally for gay men the concept of breeding was purely symbolic. It was seen as more intimate than sex with condoms but wasn't going to actually do anything. But for all I knew his seed was already fertilizing an egg deep inside my body. On one hand it sounded like the ultimate bottom fantasy. On the other hand it was kind of scary.

The two of us cleaned up together and eventually went to bed. Before falling asleep I remember saying a little prayer in my head that I would wake up with a baby inside me.

I took a pregnancy test after we had been trying for a week. Naturally this test was custom made for me by Grant and his team. I didn't pee on it, this one needed a little pinprick of blood from the tip of my finger. The test was a little pad that was covered by a thin white film. I smeared the blood on the pad, put the film and cap back on, and waited the ten minutes. According to his Grant, if this detected any amount of hCG in my blood, it would cause the pad to turn a bright blue.

After an eternity the ten minutes passed and I took the cap off the test, Val looking over my shoulder. My heart racing, I pulled off the film.

The pad was the color of dried blood.

Negative.

I felt Val's hand on me.

"It's okay, baby. We'll just keep trying."

I nodded and we kissed.

"I have to go to work now. Don't let this get you down. You can always call any one of us if you need somebody to talk to."

We kissed again and he left. I threw away the pregnancy test and went to write my daily email to Grant.

*****

Shannon and I sort of got into a routine not long after that. We'd have sex every night, but two or three nights a week we'd also try for conception. There weren't any physically addictive substances in the pills he was taking to loosen up, but neither of us wanted to risk a habit forming.

I have no doubt that the new kind of sex we were having was stranger for him, but it was definitely odd for me, too. It's a bizarre feeling to have the base of your cock surrounded by sloppy looseness while the head is gripped in almost virginal tightness. I can't say I ever got quite used to it.

Otherwise the two of us continued life as normal, the only difference being that Shannon rarely left our apartment. His contract dictated that he shouldn't go anywhere on his own, and I could tell that was an adjustment for him. Me, Grant, Marlena, or Carter would have lunch with him most days, but he still had quite a bit of alone time.

Our apartment was always very clean now. He told me that he better get used to housekeeping if he was going to be a mother, but I'm also pretty sure he did it to relieve the boredom. We were both glad we picked living in an apartment, but he still told me that he felt like an experiment in a cage sometimes.

Conversely, I was in and out of our apartment every day. Not only did I have a normal 9-5 job, I was always the one doing grocery runs and going out to get things Shannon didn't want to order online. It felt like I was always moving, always on my feet. I grew to savor the weekends and periods of doing nothing in an entirely new way.

Every Saturday morning, Shannon would take the pregnancy test. It was always tense, even more so for him than for me. But with every single negative result we got a little bit more numb to it. Yeah, it was disappointing, but we could always try again.

Life went on. He'd occupy his time at our home and I'd work as an electrician. I even made a few friends at work, but I couldn't really talk to them about what was going on in my life.

The contracts we signed were also NDAs. We weren't allowed to tell anybody we were part of a male impregnation experiment and were only allowed to tell vague outlines to our immediate family to explain why we up and moved to a different state on the spot.

The two of us talked a lot about our future ahead of us as parents. We talked about what kind of schooling we wanted the kid to have, how we would talk to them about homosexuality and how they were different from the other kids by not having a biological mother. We discussed names and whether or not we wanted to know the baby's gender right away (we decided to let the gender be a surprise).

But even despite our new lifestyle as hopeful parents, the concept of Shannon actually getting pregnant almost seemed like a fantasy to me. It was all too foreign in concept, something that only seemed theoretical.

Until one morning.

It was the fifth pregnancy test, after a full month of trying and failing to conceive. I was in another room when I heard Shannon gasp from the kitchen. I ran over and looked at the test.

Around the dried blood the pad was a vivid blue.

Both of us were blown away. According to Grant, even though this fertilization was more direct, he estimated that it would take two to four months of trying until we got lucky.

Just to make sure we went over to the facility so Grant could check and confirm it wasn't a false positive. Two different blood tests confirmed that it wasn't.

It was really happening.

Shannon was pregnant.

All five of us went out to lunch that day to celebrate. We couldn't really talk about it in public, but I think everyone around us knew we were celebrating something.

That night the two of us opted to relax instead of having sex with each other. We cuddled in bed and I touched around his body, trying to find a difference.

"Before you know it, I'm going to swell up like a balloon," he warned. "Make sure to etch this body into your memory."

"Shannon, you say that like it's a bad thing."

He shrugged. "I'm not looking forward to it. Nobody wants to gain all that weight."

"Well, rest assured that I'll still find you every bit as beautiful."

He raised his eyebrows.

"Really? Even with thirty extra pounds on me?"

"Is this a trick question or something? I love your body, but I love your heart even more. As long as your healthy and happy, it doesn't matter."

"What if we have twins?" he asked teasingly. "What if my belly gets so big you can't even pick me up?"

"I'll adapt."

He gave me a kiss.

"I'm sure I've said this, but I know I could never do this without you. I couldn't ask for a better partner."

I kissed him back.

"Don't sell yourself short, baby. You're unbelievably strong. You have the courage to be the first man in the world to try this."

He grinned haughtily. "Yeah, I am pretty awesome. But you're cool, too."

I laughed.

We cuddled some more and I looked at his beautiful face. Shannon was a knockout. He had silky blond hair, a cute button nose, and a body that drove me crazy.

The two of us were opposites in a lot of ways. It went beyond the skin color and height difference. I'm a rather straight-laced kind of guy. I got good grades in school, work hard, go to church, and try not to do anything crazy. I didn't have any piercings or tattoos. I wouldn't even get a henna.

Shannon, on the other hand, had a body decorated with metal and ink. He had a big tattoo of an eagle on his back and other smaller tattoos on his arms and legs. There were also small gauges, an eyebrow stud, even nipple piercings. Beyond that, he was never afraid of being different. He wore makeup and never cared what people thought. He'd dress up in woman's lingerie for me sometimes and remain confident in his masculinity.

I admired him a lot. Shannon always seemed so sure of himself, so comfortable in his own skin. It was being with him that helped me come out of my shell a little more, and I was there to keep him on track and add order to his life. We worked together.

I wrapped my husband in my arms, feeling blessed to have the life I was given.

We slept peacefully that night.

We slept peacefully the next night too.

But the night three days after our positive test he woke me up with a bloodcurdling scream.

Groggy and disoriented, I stumbled out of bed and turned on the light.

Shannon's hands, as well as the sheets under him, were covered in blood.

*****

I was crying the entire time. I didn't need any tests. I didn't need a diagnosis from Grant. I knew what happened.

My husband had such a panicked look on his face as he practically carried me to the facility, calling Grant, Marlena, and Carter over and over until one picked up.

Within thirty minutes all five of us were in the room where I got the surgery. Carter and Grant were examining my body.

Grant's furrowed brow and serious tone crushed any possible hope I had left.

"This is a miscarriage, Shannon. I'm really sorry."

I cried even more and Val wrapped his arms around me, even though he was crying as well. All of us were shaken.

About an hour later Carter and Marlena went home, leaving Grant, Val and me sitting at a table, completely worn out.

"I'll be honest, I didn't think this would happen," I said finally.

Grant yawned a bit.

"It's a tragedy, but unfortunately it happens all the time. Don't lose hope."

Suddenly I had a horrible realization. I remembered in our contracts how it said we had to keep at it for a year. It was entirely possible that I wouldn't get pregnant again, or I could keep miscarrying. I couldn't imagine going through this again. After a year, would I even want to try anymore? What if—

Val's voice interrupted my thoughts.

"Shannon, whatever you're thinking, stop it!"

He must have read something in my expression. He came up and hugged me tightly.

"It's okay, baby. Everything happens for a reason. We're still together. We're still fighting."

"Val's right," Grant said. "Your miscarriage had nothing to do with the fact that you're male. Your womb is still healthy and working perfectly. It didn't happen now, but I know we'll get there. Have faith in the process."

I had to smile at these two very different men trying to comfort me in two very different ways.

Grant stood up.

"I don't know about you guys, but I'm in no mood to go back to sleep. You want some coffee?"

I looked at my phone, seeing it was 4:52 in the morning.

"Yeah, I'll take some."

Val said no thanks.

As heartbreaking as it was, life still went on. We kept living together and kept trying to conceive, but what happened remained in the back of my mind. I knew I wasn't prepared for it, but what could a person possibly do to prepare for something like that?