All Comments on 'No Way _ Mary: Alternative'

Sorry no better than the first.

Waited too long to dump her. After her 1st time- a 3some!- he should've kicked her out, at least for a week or so. The next time at the club with the girl's night, divorce time. Then demand her friend to say what she's been doing, in front of her husband. And recording the conversation with the friend & wife when she returned. After, he sees the lawyer, not after a few more times. I suppose the author, having read a few of her (his?) stories, loves weak, spineless men. 2 stars (barely) Bob

⭐ Yeah, sorry. He stilled played willing cuck past her first whorefest. Should have been curbfest the same night.

Author CHEATED! Told us that this was NOT just an alternative ending, but that several more changes had been made, so the WHOLE story MUST be read afresh by the end of page two it became apparent that this was a ploy, and the pathetic apology for a story was no better yet, even to the agonising point of him reflecting that "Divorce was NOT an option"! By then, I was past caring, fuming. cross and angry at his deception, It had by now past the point of redemption! Too late for that!

Great job and I loved it. You have a very fluid writing style that flows very well and you have just the right amount of detail and depth to make the story a very exciting reading. The crowd here all want blood but I think you have ended it well. I just wish you had ended it with a little remorse for what Mary put him through.

Ok... Noa gay... Alpha it is. 5 i think hard work or rather hard way.

Sorry now much better. He is way too calm and she had to be humiliated and punished. Of any cheater deserved a smack down it was Mary.

Your previous version was diarhea. This is better, not by much though. Not runny and more solid, but still shit. He could of had a field day with her being a hooker. Some ads in the newspaper with Gina wife experience and her real phone number and email address so that everyone knew who and what she was and then banning access to the kids. After all she is an unfit mother.

Better than the first. Shame there was no fallout for her friend Tracy for covering for her.

Must be a whiore at heart to write this shit.

Wow!

3 stars and only because he divorced the whore.

Just one more pathetic cuck/slut story

Nah, still just as rank as the first one. Still writing total mc idiots. Still preaching cuckoldry. Still having stupid dialog with excessive waffling by the mc. His dialog response was ridiculously weak. Indecisive posturing, just more drivel.

Well, I guess this one is MUCH BETTER than the first one. At least this one is gone now. But getting that skank after her Jo plugged her was outlandish. I wouldn't have screwed that with someone else's cock.

What an aweful alternative to a horrendous story by a deeply british (the historical kind, a.k.a. the worst kind of way, leaving a mark almost as bad as the church did on human history)

Twice as good as the first one. Gets a 2

Stupid hub was aloser from the point where he allowed her to go to the bar with that.guy.

First night should have been the last night. Why would he have sex with her again. When the STDs start to present, he could have been clear but instead he will have to hope what she gave him is curable. She was tainted after that first night and should have been cast into the gutter where she belonged. Dating Cathy is worse. She is disgusting and had years to catch drug resistant diseases.

He should have kicked the cheating slut to the kerb after the first night especially after she said she had THREE men No way would i have ever let my cock go near her after that night (jaybee186)

Yes,I like this version better. It seems a more logical conclusion than her simply becoming an escort.

Well written and thoroughly enjoyed. Thanks

Thanks for writing!

He was just hoping her fucking around for money wasn't true.

In my case It only took two minutes to end it.

Well written; understandable that some men Love so deep they can't realize quickly.

I'll give britease a 5 on writing ability. A 3 on theme and gullibility of the victim. actual (5) reality.

This shows the mind of the author. Usually found in the bottom of a cesspit.

Story sucks more than Mary. Why did he let this shit happen the first time? And when he catches her at the hotel, he helps the punter fuck her and rapes her himself? They're both scum; what is it with you Brits? A 1* story only becaus I can't give a negative number.

All of the husbands you write about have bigger pussies than the slugs they are married to. She quoted herself out right in front of him and his friends but he continued to duck her nasty skanky ass and tried to “work it out”. If he was any dumber he might forget how to breathe.

Why would any sane man want to be in a relationship with a whore? I just don't get it. Even an ex-whore.

The mere thought nauseated me.

But it's just fiction right

much better and more realistic that the 1st. I wonder how zalana would describe the overwrought reaction of the husband over his wifes adding the skill set of whore to her original titles of mother and wife? real problem is that this is actually normal thinking for the last few generations of women , in the usa at least. they think they can have it all, are entitled to anything they want, totally disregard the feelings wants and needs of all others while satisfying all their every little desires, fantasies, fetishes. as the big bang theory quip goes, bitches do be crazy, and they have losrt allintelligence morals ethics and empathy. maybe this abortion on demand till 30 days after birth is a good thing as it saves the "mothers" from facing their deficiencies as nurturing human beings?or even just decent human beings?

" That sort of thing seldom actually happens in real life. "

But... according to all your stories..a husband will sit there slackjawed and watch his wife go off with another man... or watch her fuck another man..or here watch her "pretend" to be a whore for another man. THATS what you think actually happens in real life?

Then when she shows back up, jizz still running down her leg, she drops a tear or two.. and he picks her up to comfort her.. because gee.. that disrespect and total betrayal wasn't so bad, honey... let's get past this.

I'll tell you want happens in real life. After finding out she fucked three guys for money. If the husband had balls we would have tossed her out, then anonymously tip the cops for a prostitution sting operation. Full custody of the kids, no support.

This wasn't much better than the first...

boring. the husband never goes for the jugular in these stupid stories. i'm not talking violence-wise, but sheer emotional brutality should be on the table. this was mybe half a star better than the original.

That’s better, much better

4/5, u still lose a point for posting the other horrid version

Liked both.

Loved it but didn’t read first one kinda wondered why he didn’t do Cath and tell her after 1st time to see her response

The minute she said she had not only cheated but cheated with 3 men the story should have been about the divorce and her being exposed to all her friends and contacts as a prostitute. Thereafter there could have been a description of her fall into the gutter and her being cast aside by all her friends and family. The rest of the story after her confirming her infidelity is just ridiculous.

I hated the other story, but kinda liked this one. What always gets me is WHY does it take so long for the dimwitted husband to catch on. And I agree with c-insideher, Tracy covered for her hooker friend and got away scott free. Bad story with a bad ending. Good thing it's fiction...

Better

We get "past" things, not "passed" things

So he divorces his whore wife only to take up with another whore? True that cath never lied or cheated but now that its all out in the open it will be cheaper to keep her and you get some on the side as well.

It was about a month after that infamous evening,

the week passed

i had to find out what she was hiding

/

/

Im pretty sure its illegal to marry the retarted

it's that BRITEASE Really really thanks this is an improvement on the original story. !!!

LOL...

Isn't that the scariest and in some ways the funniest thing you've ever read?

the husband knows for fact his wife has been a whore at least on one night and fucked 3 different men for 800 pounds. And yet there i is almost no emotional reaction from the husband of any kind. The wife has more emotional reaction when she comes home and talks to him then he does.

Is this like a thing now with British men that they're all emotionally deformed and psychologically stunted?

Another swing and a miss.

So Tracy gets away with covering for her at the bar?

You must be bipolar because some of your stories are good and others are horrible.

Nothing short of Mary/Gina acquiring a police record, jail time, a abusive pimp when she gets out and the total loss of her children’s love and respect could save this pile of shit. A nice social disease for hubby courtesy of “Cath” wouldn’t hurt either!

There is nothing you write that is close to being real. If you think it is then you have a distorted view of your fellow man. I was a cop for 30 years and have seen and heard of some wild shit. It this is bullshit

It's not quite the SJW beta happy cuckold driven writing the other was I guess

I liked the other better. Everyone was happy. Everyone got laid. And everyone got rich. All these stories are fantasies, some dark and some light. Well written and edited. Keep on.

The problem is use of the idiotic Martian Slut Ray and writing the husband as an imbecile who allows Mary to wander off in the first place, and then takes her back after her multiple adulteries. If you need these ridiculous tropes to write a story, you have no ability to create a real plot. The MC isn't written initially as a mental case of a weak cuck, and yet the minute Cath shows up, he is transformed into a semi-male character for just long enough to get the asinine plot rolling, and then he returns to normal and gets rid of her. What the hell is wrong with authors here? Instead of creating plots that normal people can recognize as possibly happening, we get plots over and over again that display the behavior of perhaps .01% or .001% at best of the population. I can't imagine English husbands are as weak as the Brit writers here portray them.

Far more plausible ending than the previous fantasy

antagonizing the reader is your solution? the first version stunk. you expecting people to applaud a cheating whore of a wife?!? sure everyone wants to marry one. lol you make it sound SO appealing! smh

Sorry, Brit, the folks who complained about the original story were full of ... baloney.

The alternative is unrealistic as hell. Happily married mother becomes a prostitute, gets divorced, and only gets to see her kids once a month. Hubby divorces her because she is a prostitute, and promptly takes up with a prostitute, wondering if he will end up with her as a wife. Riiight.

The original story is equally unrealistic, but the ending is funny as hell. One can view the whole story as a great spoof.

She got what she wanted.

No woman in her right mind wants to be a pro. I see the stories here, but they are all crap written from a school boy's point of view. She wasn't a pro. She was charging her boyfriends for sex. It's a pity, really. She was a good wife until she lost her mind.

That would be impossible to sell. This wasn't a whole lot better. Yeah he divorced her but he sure took his time. The first time would have been it.

Nuf said

Far better and more logical ending then the first effort.

Much,.much better ending to this one, although the boiling in oil isn't a bad idea.

4-stars

But still not good.

suck as much as the first version.

Given his wife whored herself out one night, there is no chance he would tolerate girls night out. No chance at all. Not believable. Even less believable than him keeping the cunt.

She's not exactly young anymore and she has no pimp to look after her..

If she's VERY lucky, I give it a month before she gets her first couple of really bad encounters, two months before she starts looking for protection while using substances to cope with the hardships of her "exciting" new life.

The price she's charging is completely insane for her age when there's baby-faced 15 years olds high school dropouts out there competing with her saggy teats.

Letting her have access to the kids is a horrendous idea, BTW, you don't wanna expose your children to The Lifestyle..

that said,

MUCH better ending than the other version. Didn't care for the protagonist ending with Cath, he should be WAY smarter than that.

Well I think that ending was much better!

Well you won't be getting any from me.

Call this a better ending? It was worse that the first.

He knows what she's been doing

He sees the punter take her bareback, and doesn't say a word

Then he does the same, risking his own health.

Neither one is fit to bring up children.

"I'll have to give it back to him or I'm in trouble." - What kind of trouble? Is he going to report her to the Better Business Bureau?

I repeat what someone said in the first story: First, Tracy says just play along, then says be careful?

"Her need to find out how other men felt inside her" - I've never bought that rationale. What does it matter how other men feel "inside her"? She's married, there aren't supposed to BE any other men inside her. What will she do if they feel better? Cheat? Leave her husband? Put up with the "lesser" cock?

Why the fuck didn't he confront her with her lie, that he KNEW that she wasn't with Tracy?

Why the fuck didn't he confront them in the bar? Since she knew his name, that should have told Michael that Tom was telling the truth!

She didn't have a "dirty little affair," she just became a whore!

Much better ending! I WOULD be curious if she is working at the supermarket.

The flaw with the story is the setup. The intro was too serious to be played off as a comedy. It would have worked better if Mary/Gina was portrayed more as a "Poor Debbie" type. A victim.

I thought there was just only one good writer who demeans men the way MM can...

..... the original was far far better................

The second ending fits best with most folks' moral compass, I think. The story is of course a perfect loving wife scenario and beautifully done at that. It's well written and portrays the husband's anguish at events quite well. What's hard to take is the switch from devoted and somewhat conservative wife to self centered slut as quickly as flipping a switch. Sure, that's a classic plot device in loving wife stories, but it happened in a nanosecond here and it hit me like a sledgehammer in this tale, so there's quite a shock that comes with it and my wounded sensibilities needed vengeance. I actually prefer the first ending- it's amusing in an "if you can't beat 'em join 'em" kind of way. But in either story I remain angry at the instant destruction of trust in a marriage, especially to a loving and loyal spouse. I'm outraged because her behavior is over the top outrageous. Everybody loves a slut, until she demonstrates how little you matter to her.

The ending was lame as hell, especially considering you made an alternative just for it. Your reasoning for the lame ending was "That sort of thing seldom actually happens in real life" so why did you bother to write this story then? I highly doubt situations like this happen often where the wife one day just decides she wants to be a hooker.

Why did you bother ending the first story the way you did then? Because one thing even less likely than your wife randomly wanting to be a hooker one day is you finding out your wife whored herself out to 3 guys, then you go out and have sex with your friend who is a whore and then turn into a millionaire pimp who also pimps out his whore wife.

Like someone else said his reaction to finding out his wife whored herself out to 3 guys is even less believable. Most people would fly off the handle. So your reasoning for a BTB ending seldom happening is dumb as hell if the whole story does not follow suit. Why does the ending have to be (in your case) realistic if the rest of the story isn't?

Just because you personally wouldn't burn the bitch doesn't mean it "seldom happens". It happens plenty of times. Husband comes home and catches cheating wife and her lover and husband beats the lover and goes to jail. Happens quite a bit. Sometimes the husband will catch her lover out and beat him with no witnesses. It happens quite often. Hell husbands sometimes beat the wife too. I see your comments at the end of your stories that you don't give an ending too, telling your readers to use their imagination when you didn't do it yourself kind of irks me.

than the first

It is sad that it appears that Tom had a good marriage in the beginning.

Letting another couple dare a mad and emotional wife while out drinking os bad.

Tom should have shut it down fast, by telling her how beautiful she was and that she was his jewel. But instead kind of dared her while she was an emotional wreck. Mary wouldn't have had that hunger awoken if she jad never had three lovers in one night.

So in the end all were hurting and no one's happy. To me it would have been a great story if this first time hooker incident had been avoided. I would have never just shrugged my shoulders, I would have ask her to dress back let's please go home.

Not enjoyable reading but good writing nonetheless. This is the only story of yours that I rated low. I just didn't like it.

boiled her in oil.

It's likely my own cynicism shining through, but this one I thought was better than the first...not your best, but better in comparison.

The fact that NO ONE liked the first one. Seems nobody shares your world vision. Your snide comments at the start, and end, though probably meant to be 'witty', just seem bitter! Your inability to accept any form of criticism, even constructive criticism, seems to be a recurring theme in your side commentaries. I look forward to reading your 'Cutting remarks' to me, at the start of your next story! I like a good laugh, so make it a good one!

As my mother once said about my former wife, "Too bad she didn't get that out of her system before she had her babies." Our hero, IMHO, should have been shed of her after her first night of whoring.

In the first story Tom's behavior at the end was too incongruous. Especially as he appeared so distraught at Mary's disappearance and crushed by Cath's late night phone call. Perhaps a more lighthearted beginning, or a more humorous take would have prepared the reader for the ending.

In the alternative story Tom's behavior (and Mary's for that matter) was much more congruent and believable. The loving husband temporarily driven to hate filled cruelty in the Michael episode was a much more acceptable husband reaction. Given his previous behavior and what he'd been through.

I would make so bold as to suggest a different end to the Michael encounter. At the point where Michel says. "Fancy a go now old boy. We'll swap places if you want." I would have Tom say; "Are you daft. I've no idea in bloody hell what STD's may be crawling around in that whore's hole." There could be a new scene with a worried Michael reaction, then taking it up at "I watched with cynical amusement…" This would be another delicious dig at Gina enhancing Tom's new response to his whore wife. He could also to have hoped to harm her future prospects (monetarily if not frequency) once word got around after Michael would have spread the word.

But this story as written much better. As it stands.

Liked this version MUCH more!

First she tells him to just "play along", THEN she tells him to "be careful."

Well, which is it?

a lot of the do disappear in shallow unmarked graves or deep ponds with heavy shoes on. Much easier. A drive in the country for a picnic near a previously dug hole and a short goodbye. Enough people knew she was a whore so guess some stranger picked her up and they ran off or he did something to her.

This is more like a "Do I HAVE to write THIS?" story.

Felt flat. Very.

Who am I kidding? I am never hesitant to comment...I do not want to offend a respected writer by what might be a negative review.

Reading this a second time, I couldn't help but feel this story was forced. This is NOT the story you wanted to write. You already wrote the story you wanted to write. This is the story you felt that the fans wanted to READ. But you outlined this in the preface.

The story kept seeming to want to twist into a cuckold tale (and please recall that I don't use that word as an incredibly idiotic put down, I use it as a description) And let's face it: cuckold tales raise strong...passions in their readers. In some, who groove on the strong emotions and humiliations, it's arousing in some fashion, that this woman or bull or whatever can do such things to hapless husband. In other, their revulsion to such a circumstance is just as strong. Funny how the emotions are of equal intensity...

That being said, this story felt like it was supposed to be a cuckold story. How else to describe this man's absolutely ineffectual and odd reactions to his wife's actions.

-He dares her to act like a whore.

-He lets his wife wander off with a strange man and only goes to look for her a LONG time later.

-His imagination wallows in his wife losing her filmy dress.

-He invites her back home from her night of degradation with nary a raised voice.

-He tacitly accepts that she didn't have a single episode of stupidity, but WENT BACK TROLLING FOR MORE STRANGE COCK...TWICE. Still no raised voice. It just isn't done in Blighty.

-He accepts her into his bed with affection offered freely...but no sex. (See below)

-He allows her to wander off unsupervised after this for A MONTH (timeline hazy)

-He finally follows her and discovers she isn't where she says she is, doesn't confront, and confirms that it is a REGULAR thing, this deception. Still no confrontation.

-But...if I was psychoanalyzing the STORY (not the author), I find it...telling that AFTER this discovery of her wandering apace, THEN he has sex with her for the first time. Really...? I mean...REALLY?!?

-And when he discovers she is, in fact, a whore, he HELPS THE MAN FUCK HER and thinks he is a 'decent chap' (this is not a typical American reaction)

Just...wow. I have to ask: suddenly he 'toughens up' but where was his spine during all of these prior incidents? Was it being cleaned? Was it getting a tune up? It is a trifle late for it to make a sudden appearance as a deus ex machina in the third act. But I suppose if it hadn't been missing, there wouldn't be much of a story.

It was an emotionally engaging tale, but the wallowing in his pain without DOING anything about his pain made me feel this was a cuckold tale.

Still, nicely written.

The first one was funny and preposterous. This is the correct outcome.

Carry on.

Any married woman that starts to hook for excitement expects the worst or is delusional. It takes a very rare husband to be happy when saying, "Hi honey, how was your evening? How many tricks did you turn?" It must be special to be last in line every night. The kids will so happy to tell their school mates that their mum is an aging call girl. Just as likely they will have to endure derision and rejection. Then they can try to explain why their father is either a willing cuckold or pimp.

I actually preferred the first ending, as far-fetched as it was. This ending just seemed mean spirited and driven by the BTB crowd. Write what you like and feel. Some will like it, some will hate it and most won't comment or vote anyway. Who cares? This isn't rocket science and the problems of the world aren't being solved.

If authors let peoples comments rule their writing, nothing would ever get posted.

Keep on writing.

From the story Mary only wanted to experience new cock not become a prostitute ! So I would have suspect she would do it for a very short while then stop once she had full filled her quota of cock. Then with her proceeds from her part job spend on her husband, perhaps a luxury exotic holiday to so him how Mich she really did love him.

One question, why do you balk at boiling her in oil? Not that I'm calling for it, but you it seems you shy away from it because it "doesn't happen in real life". Honestly, what part of your story do you believe is prevalent in real life? It's fantasy, my boy, let yourself go.

Preferred the original-It was more humorous

Ironic that he ended up with Cath.

...barely. By far, your worst story idea ever. Even the slightly better ending didn't help much.

Although to be more in depth, I was hooked by the point that they had made love after her first night. The ending just completely ruined the story for me

This story just kinda made me a bit upset. Wouldn't read it again

Still didn't like it much though. Not big on boiling in oil, but still.

i would have prefered him to put an add in the local newspaper. tell them its a practical joke and he is willing to pay for it. big picture of gina (mary) that says "local whore soon to be ex-wife willing to do anything for a price starts at 500 quib" on the front page. make it impossible to show her face in town period. she has to leave her parents, her kids and her friends. unless she was honest about stopping... which tbh with the story i just read i would doubt it. you write well but the story didnt call to me saying he got her back just as good as she got him. so can you really call that revenge?

I read some of the other comments and they pretty well sum it up. I think that you are trying to be realistic not in some never never land but you totally missed with this story unless this is the type of response that you are looking for. About the only thing that you did with this story is show that the Brits are total wimps and have no backbones and are total submissive to there wives. NOT YOU BEST EFFORT total waste of time

BH

I admire the way you can invent and develop a story and I don't like to be discourteous to anyone who has these skills and publishes for my enjoyment. Nonetheless this might be an improvement but still doesn't work for me, Tearsofsorrow sums it fairly well, though a little rudely.

I thought the fact that her first experience involved three men was unnecessarily over the top, and would have been ample to finish the marriage there and then. As I said in regard to the first edition the humiliation element is not modified and remains a breaking point.

The reintroduction of Cath is a bit silly and not worthy of this author.

Keep them coming though!

Had to grit my teeth awhile 'til the end showed up. Just heard on NPR 12/5/10, that the surest thing British is bad sex. Oh, how that plays out in LW stories. The British turn out some imaginative erotica, but maybe that's a result of many poor marriage relationships. Lack of communication generates so many bad situations, doesn't it?

the second story was far better. I think Gina got what she deserved and there is no way she gave up selling herself. great story tho brit. keep up the great work.

Thanks for a good read. Ifound this 2nd ending sad.

Truth, as she later discussed, she had been intrigued and turned on my her girlfriends' encounters and was secretly curious. Meeting Cath open her up (with some booze to help) and she toyed (played with fire) intentionally and exciterdly to see if she could get a taker at the club. It was over, and then, he immediately had his hand on her botom...slut Mary was now in the open and toying, testing and experimenting and now we know, getting great fucling. Okay, I liked this second chapter, what she did at the club only pushed her fantasies to extreme and the cheating would begin. Problem, he always loved her, in every sense of the word and meaning. She originally loved him and still enjoyed the love and safety of a husband and home. Sadly, he really loved her, this is going to hyrt badly but a man has to be a man, not a wimp or cuckold! Glad you had him get a divorce, I would have walked into the lobby bar, yelled at her for all to hear, grabbed her by the haid and booed her ass so hard she would fall flying into the lounge for all to hear and see. No bruises. I would have punched the suitor and told him what I thought of a guy who screws anothers wife. Anyway, relieved and happy that you wrote this version. Do I think she stopped hooking...on a scale of 1-10, I'd think ... maybe..a 102. Good story, keep writing!

It didn't need to be this complex. He should have dumped her after she whored around on him the first time. Obviously her desire for other sex partners is more important than anything else in her life, her husband, her marriage, her kids. She made a very clear choice, in the presence of her husband, that she was going to screw around. That kind of thinking can't be fixed. Bye bye bitch,