Nora - Embracing an Erotic Life Ch. 08

The chapters that follow describe the sexual lives of an attractive and successful young Chicago husband and wife, James and Nora. First they review the erotic aspects of their lives during the early years of their marriage. Then, after careful consideration, Nora enters a relationship with an older man, Adrian Benton, who helps her, and James, fulfill some of their fantasies and who promises to guide them toward further sexual adventures. Some of these will involve Adrian directly; others he will suggest and sometimes arrange. Gradually James, and especially Nora, become more confident and creative as they seize opportunities to satisfy their growing hunger for erotic excitement.

A new sexual relationship?

On a Friday afternoon in early February my wife, Nora, and I spoke not a word during our elevator ride down from Adrian Benton's law office high above Michigan Avenue. The conversation we had just had with Benton left us with a decision that could deeply affect our personal lives, especially the most intimate aspects of our relationship. Benton had asked us to consider his proposal and, depending on our initial reactions, to join him for drinks and dinner at his house in Chicago's Gold Coast neighborhood the next Friday evening. He hoped we would be able to decide on his proposal during the next several weeks, though he hoped it could be sooner.

Nora and I remained quiet on our drive home. As we entered our apartment on North Lakeview Street near Lincoln Park, I broke our silence by asking," Nora, are you leaning to saying no? Or even yes?"

Nora replied softly, "Not a definite no, James, but not yes, at least not yet. What about you?"

"The same," I responded. "We need time to think, and then to speak frankly about our feelings. Maybe we can begin that tomorrow evening if we stay in and cook together. You have told me before that Adrian Benton recently has seemed highly attentive to you. But now I need to know what you are feeling about this."

Nora had hinted weeks earlier that she suspected that at some point Adrian Benton would act on his increasingly evident interest in her. I had not pushed her to describe her feelings or share her reaction to his attentions.

I'm sure that deep into that Friday night Nora was recalling our conversation that day with Adrian, formerly the senior partner at Belknap and Smithers, one of the oldest, most prestigious and best politically connected law firms in Chicago. I was doing the same.

We had arrived at Benton's office promptly at 5:30. He had led us into a small adjacent library and motioned for us to seat ourselves on a small couch. He offered us wine or, if we preferred, a martini. We both settled for red wine.

Benton sat in a leather chair facing us and began the conversation by describing his impressions of Nora and me during our several years involvement with the firm. "Though neither of you is a lawyer you hold unique positions here. In just a few years you both have become quite useful to the firm."

He was aware that I held a Ph.D in economics from the University of Chicago after graduating from Princeton. Benton said, "James, you have used your education and your dissertation research to become an excellent advisor on the firm's own investments and, when we have needed it, as a consultant on investments for selected major individual clients. It has been a pleasure to work with you the past five years."

Benton then reviewed his familiarity with Nora's work as a specialist in art and the art market, managing the firm's own valuable art collections and serving at times as an advisor to wealthy clients regarding decisions on their own art, especially issues regarding provenance and ownership.

He said, "Nora, I know that you grew up in Kansas City, graduated from the School of the Art Institute of Chicago and then acquired an MBA from the Kellogg School at Northwestern." And he added, "I have read your thesis on the financial condition of private art galleries in Chicago. Given how reticent for-profit galleries are to reveal their financial practices and conditions, this must have been a challenging research project. From my experience with galleries as clients and from what I know of your work at the firm, few individuals in Chicago have your insights."

Benton stressed that he had grown to admire not only our expertise but also our our ability as non-lawyers to function effectively within the firm. He said, "I am not the only partner you both have impressed within the firm and more broadly by your energy, confidence, sophisticated good taste and, not least, by your appearance. You are a very attractive couple."

We were flattered by Benton's comments. He was highly regarded in the firm and highly influential in the community. He made clear also that he knew quite a bit more about us, including that in our early months at the firm we had met at one of its summer picnics on Lake Michigan and then were married six months later.

Looking mostly directly at Nora, and glancing at me from time to time me, Adrian Benton explained that he had watched Nora closely at the firm and at various political and cultural events around town over the past four years. "And I have come to regard you, Nora" he said "as a beautiful and highly desirable woman. I want to be very frank with both of you. As I'm certain Nora already suspects, I want to become her lover."

It shocked me to hear him say this so directly, but his proposal was not altogether surprising. In fact, on the way to this meeting I had asked Nora what she thought this meeting was about. She answered immediately, "Mostly, it will be about me. Don't be surprised by that, James."

Benton went on to say, "I find myself constantly thinking of Nora, fantasizing about the two of us together and how it would be to make love to her. I have been unable to get her out of my mind. At 51 I am considerably older than you both. But I am still very vigorous, able to both provide and enjoy intense sexual pleasure, and I seek new ways in which to do so. I need that. And I need Nora."

Benton looked me directly in the eye. "James, you should understand that despite what I have just said, I will not pursue Nora further without your permission as well as hers. I have no intention of breaking up a good marriage or in driving you apart. But I remember when I was about your age, I was 33, after five years of marriage my first wife and I found that our sexual life together was declining, was becoming stale. We did not know how to fix that then and ultimately it drove us apart.

"I don't know if a diminishing sexual life is yet an issue for the two of you. You certainly always appear comfortable and close when I see you together. But what I can help you and Nora find as a couple is a new stage in your relationship, one that offers a variety of sexual experience that will enrich your pleasure individually and as a couple." He explained some of these experiences would involve him but others need not. "While I seek my own sexual pleasure, I also derive satisfaction from observing others and in finding sexual adventures for them beyond my own involvement if that is what they come to desire."

Benton concluded our conversation by telling us that if we were prepared to meet him for dinner at his house the next Friday evening we might begin then to explore the more personal and sexual aspects of a potential relationship. "If this does not go well for all of us," he said, "we should recognize that and go no further. My wife will be away, "he said, "but I would tell her about our meeting beforehand. Janet and I have an open relationship and she would not object, as I do not to her own private arrangements. Each of us at times has suggested ways to bring others into our marriage. "He asked us to let him know on Monday if we would meet with him again.

Following that first meeting with Adrian Benton, Nora and I may have had a preliminary sense of what we would each prefer, but neither was yet ready to reveal it, even tentatively. We needed to consider how such an arrangement might impact our future, individually and as partners. My own thoughts went first to our sexual experiences within our marriage so far, and what I thought I knew by now, or at least suspected, about Nora's deepest sexual desires. But then, did I? And how did I assess the state of our sexual satisfaction?

I recognized that Nora was well aware of her beauty and her desirability to men and I observed that she enjoyed their attention, though she did not flaunt this. How could she not be conscious of her allure with such a beautiful face and smile, a fantastic body, and a way of dressing and of carrying herself that was extremely sexy while also elegant and in good taste.

I began to recall what I have thought of as our sexual adventures beyond our own bedroom and of our more frequent recent fantasizing as indicators or our sexual attitudes. In my view we should talk about these before going further with Benton, assessing where we were and how we perceived our sexual needs going forward.

As I thought further I admitted to myself I surely had not fully uncovered or understood Nora's sexual desires, probably no husband ever does. Until recently I knew hardly anything of Nora's sexual activities before we met and, while I had asked her several times to tell me about these, she had not, and I had not pushed her very hard to reveal them to me. I knew we needed to talk again about Nora's week end of sex with my friend Andrew two years ago and what it indicated about her sexual needs. So far as I knew it was her only time with another man since we married; maybe she hungered for more but was reticent to tell me.

How would she want to respond to Adrian Benton -- and to any other men involved in the "opportunities" he spoke of. Or maybe women? Would she be honest as we talked about this?

Nora clearly enjoyed sex. With me she was especially enthusiastic about oral play of all kinds. Sometimes she verbalized freely during sex about what she wanted done to her, how it was making her feel, and what she wanted to do to and for me. She loved to tease me in private and, discretely, in public by the ways she dressed and moved and flirted. And sometimes she teased in private whispers to me on public occasions.

I suspected without evidence beyond our shared fantasies that at times Nora would have enjoyed taking a more controlling role in our sex lives; that possibility excited rather than repelled me. It seemed to me more openly asserting her needs would be a sign of growing more comfortable with her sexuality, and I thought I would welcome it. While overall we were good partners and usually shared our feelings on the full range of our married lives, including our sexual interests, perhaps we should go deeper than sharing our fantasies. I understood, and accepted, mainly this was up to her.

Certainly I could understand why Benton would find Nora so desirable and, seeing her often, become fixated on having her as a sexual partner. Nora seems, even to the one person who knows her intimately, almost perfect. I do not think of that as overstatement. Nora is five foot eight and weighs usually 125 pounds give or take a few. Her body has curves in all the right places but nothing so prominent as to be out of balance. Lovely breasts and nipples, a firm stomach, a tight rear, and long and shapely legs with well defined ankles, something I admire. I like conjuring up images of her when we are away from each other and it is easy for me to become sexually stimulated merely by recalling how she has looked in certain situations. When I have compared Nora to other women I often thought of Catherine Deneuve in her early movies, or Nicole Kidman more recently. People often have told us we are very attractive together -- but mostly they surely were thinking of Nora.

I ordinarily have not felt jealous of Nora when I saw her flirting with other attractive men--which happened often. She had always seemed to find me attractive and, more important to me, to admire me in other ways as well. I am six feet two and usually around 190 pounds. I have a very toned body. I had run cross country and played on the tennis team in high school in Belmont, then began rowing and rigorous weight work at Princeton and I continued those all the way through my graduate work at the University of Chicago. My arms, shoulders, chest and legs showed the result. I have big strong hands. People noticed the contrast between Nora's classic light skinned look and my darker Mediterranean coloring. I once overheard someone say to Nora, "Your husband reminds me of the Spanish tennis player, Rafael Nadal. So striking!"

At present, Nora and I alternate swimming in the morning or working out in the early evening in the small gym in our building or in a larger nearby fitness center. I have noticed Nora prefers now to go to the larger gym; more good equipment and more men. It has occurred to me as she approaches 30 she increasingly appreciates being watched and, as she well understands, lusted after.

As we were kissing goodnight after our first meeting with Adrian Benton, Nora whispered to me she had something intriguing to tell me. I asked her to go ahead. She said, "James, do you remember several weeks ago while we were having sex you asked me, as you sometimes do, to imagine some man other than you was fucking me. You suggested as you entered me I should envision giving myself to some very attractive and powerful older man who found me irresistible, and so I did. I know I was really turned on by that situation as we made love that night. I don't know what inspired you to suggest this fantasy, but I enjoyed it. Maybe that episode will give us both more to consider as we decide how to respond to Adrian's proposal."

Sexual Prelude: Teasing,Testing, Talking

The Saturday evening after our first meeting with Adrian Benton we cooked dinner together and later settled on our couch to share a fine Cabernet and to talk. I agreed to go first and I began.

"Nora, I feel we understand ourselves and each other very well in most ways and we seem more than contented with our lives. It took us only a few weeks after we met five years ago to realize we were strongly attracted to each other physically--and also we were becoming very good friends and developing a high respect for each other."

Nora and I had quickly found we shared many values and had many common characteristics. We both felt mutual respect and friendship would anchor our relationship. "That has not changed, only strengthened," I said. "That is why, Nora, I believe it is more important now that we review our sexual relationship, how it has developed to this point and where it seems to be going, even apart from Adrian Benton's proposal. We know we are attractive to others in the way we look and act. We are familiar with being referred to as a striking couple in part because of our contrasting appearances and because we take such good care of ourselves. We see ourselves as thoughtful, competent and confident and we both recognize we are ambitious and we try to seize opportunities that come our way."

I went on, following up on that thought. "It occurs to me, Nora, that perhaps one way to view Adrian Benton's proposal is as another opportunity. Before taking this opportunity, if that is what it is, because it also has risks, we need to consider where we are and have been in our sexual relationship."

Nora responded, "I agree James it is important for us to review our sexual interests and desires. You know I have found our five years together very pleasurable from the start to the present. I am not discontented or highly frustrated. But, as I have begun to think about this, it seems as time has passed we may gradually have come to want, perhaps even really need, something extra to stimulate us. A few times we have acted upon that, though perhaps more of the time we have lacked the imagination or perhaps just the energy in our busy and otherwise fulfilling lives, to move forward.

I'm certain we both have in our minds my week-end of sex with your friend Andrew two years ago, the only time for me, and it was with your initial encouragement. You were a facilitator and I eagerly seized the opportunity, embarrassingly so. I must have badly needed something sexually beyond our relationship; we talked about what this meant but only once and with no follow up. My time with Andrew was the only time I have had sex with another man since we married. So what to make of it now? "

She said she also had been recalling several times we were more sexually daring than usual, sometimes at her initiative but mostly at mine; she had enjoyed, in varying degree, almost all of these times and thought she would enjoy more. She began to recall one of them.

"James, I remember on our honeymoon in Switzerland we were on a trail through a woods overlooking one of those deep mountain lakes. You led us off the main path into a very shaded area. You put your arm around me and told me how beautiful I looked and you wanted to take some photos of me. As you began to photograph me, gradually you asked me to take off more and more of my clothes until I was sitting on a fallen log entirely naked. You had never photographed me like that before and it made me feel hot and daring. I remember wondering what you would think of me if I took the lead -- which I then did. I cupped my breasts as though I was presenting them to you, and then I spread my legs so you could see my sex, and I moved in a very provocative way, thrusting my body toward you. I could tell from watching you you were very turned on and your cock was getting very hard. And then you came over to me, and I took out your dick and I put my mouth around it and moved on you until you came. I love those photos you made and I still sometimes take the prints out of the folder just to remind myself of my excitement at that time." I loved hearing Nora share this memory with me.

"I remember, Nora"once we had an afternoon party when we lived in that first apartment where most of the back wall in the living room was floor to ceiling glass. Some of your friends and some of mine were there, and you wore a long white summer dress, not transparent but it seemed nearly so when the bright sun was coming through the window and you were standing against it. The dress showed off your breasts so well anyway.

"But what really excited me was you were standing along that glass wall talking with two or three men who obviously were admiring how you looked. I happened to glance at you looking so radiant and sexy and Instantly recognized anyone who looked in your direction would see that you had nothing on underneath, your then very hairy bush was very prominent, and all your curves below your waist were tantalizingly displayed. It aroused me and made me so insanely jealous others could see what I perhaps thought only I should see. I could not decide whether to ask you to move away from the window or whether I wanted that scene to go on and on. It was so hot -- and so was the sex that night when I finally did tell you about it. I believe you were excited to think about other men seeing you like that."

As we shared these memories we paused to kiss, and I put my arm around Nora and began to stroke her breast very gently.

"And here is an image I like to recall, James," Nora began. "I remember how you so much enjoyed going to the rooftop pool in that same apartment building. All that first summer after our wedding I wore a modest one piece blue swim suit, but when it got wet it made the pink of my areole and of my nipples very, very apparent. And it turned me on you found it so provocative you could see my breasts so clearly, and especially others around the pool could see them too. I began to learn how excited you became when you noticed other men enjoyed looking at me especially if you felt they could not take their eyes off my body. I learned I became excited by that too--for your sake. We usually went there just for the half hour before the pool closed at night. Sometimes we would stand together on the side of the pool just to put me on display. I was learning to like that.Sometimes we would go to a deeper area; you would stroke my pussy under the water and sometimes you would take your cock out of the side of your swim suit and I would stroke you. That was very nice. I found it exciting -- especially because I knew you did. "