All Comments on '"Oh" Submission Town: A Mother Falls'

I enjoyed the story.

It's now Easter 2024, perfect timing!! Twelve years late for the 2012 competition, but I hope your story pleased the judges, as it pleased me!!

Could be really hot, but there is zero chemistry between the daughter and the mom. The kid reads like a bully and all the swearing is juvenile. The friend and the mom are hot together. Helping her get dressed was sexier then the whole sex farce with the kid. I came here for the incest but it was meh. Too bad the friend had zero action with the mom cause all their scenes were hot and they didn't need to be swearing, name-calling bullies to achieve that.

The potential for followup stories is unlimited. I hope you will write the next chapter.

Ridiculous, but great story. Well imagined and well written.

The story would have been hotter if it were all lesbian.

Extremely hot! And, looking forward to the next chapter... and more of your other stories! I do believe that I have found my favourite writer!

Very great

Can't wait to read more.

fantastic i always wanted to be fucked by a group and she will be now

Improbable as the arrival of Ben in the church basement, the balance of the story was stimulating. Follow up episodes should be hot as well. Your stories now consume all of my extra time. Wish I had found you sooner. Wish there was a way to mark stories as read. Now I have to check to see if I have commented.

OMG so hot can not wait to see what happens next

New to literotica, and so happy I found you!

Ohhhhh. These stories rock my world

Your incest stories are sooo good, I miss my Mistress-Mommy

awesome!

Oh Jasmin.. another great story.. again you should write more and finish this one. it may take me a while but I am now determined to read them all. Best wishes.. K… from london

I won't tell you what I did several times throughout this story! ;)

are you makeing "Oh" Submission Town: Cum Cum Lesbian Fun or

"Oh" Submissive Town: Best Friends

This the kind of story i"m used to jasmine. A real good feel good story one that energizes ones juices.

I am still wondering about how the daughter knows about the size of her dad’s cock.

If anyone wA=ants to fuck me please get in touch you can have me. Cathy X

I enjoy your writing and think you created some interesting characters. For me however, you made Kim submit too quickly. You have the opportunity to ratchet up the sexual tension between mother and daughter, if you ever consider a rewrite. Have Kim resisting her daughter's commands and have Cynthia being a brazen slut in front of her Mom. Then her resistance breaks.

Unreal Ms. Jasmine! You sure know how to tease a cock! Your writing is like your hand coming through the computer and jacking my cock direct. Your skills are amazing. You should be world renown! Please keep the stories cuming.

One of the sexiest stories I've read in quite a while! However, I'd love to see more pantyhose involved! Can't wait to see what's next.

Wow that was one of the hottest stories I have read. You have out done yourself again. I loved the Dom/sub theme as well as the incest/ lesbian theme. I can't wait to read the next chapter. I hope they will include all the suggested themes.

Jasmine - loving this one

Keep them cumming

Love Carmella xxx

You definitely have a skill with words..I also imagine some actual on the job skills as a lover of sexual adventure.

I am not as talented as you but I have a story line in my mind. It has to do with two wives who live in same neighborhood and are friends as are the hubbies. One hubby is feeling down as sex is almost stale and not exciting. Both wives are middle age living in New England having weight problems.

Hubby comes across an add for a fat farm and sexual re-education company located on the boarder of Vermont and Canada he shares his find with the other hubby. they plot to arrange for wives to go to a 10 week Camp. The wives are told hubby got a 4 day weekend trip through Vermont to look at Foliage. He tells wife he can not take off so why not take her girlfriend. On Friday hubbies take wives to bus point for departure. They look out windows bus stops some along the way there are about 60 some women on this trip all seems normal even the late lunch. Come night fall they arrive at the camp there is another bus pulling in at same time. They unload and are greeted by what can only be a Drill Sergeant. Women are told to grab their bag and enter a large barn. They look around and this place seems to be staffed mostly by very sexy fit women. They are told to place bags on a conveyor belt then to stand in a formation turn right line up turn left line up.

The next command is now strip!

One lady says never, another says what did he say? A very fit female approaches and tears clothes from lady who said never she is then whipped the others undress quickly.

They are then told what the place is and how harsh it will be if they don't do as told.

They are then given physicals weighted measured prodded then photos are taken this is for before and will be filed with their grad photo for comparison.

Now told to get their bag they can get out toiletries and any thongs G-strings Garters and nylons. taken the remainder outside as for their first night there will be a bon-fire.

The bags go right on the fire and the naked ladies watch their possessions burn.

Later they are assigned 4 to a room. They find the room but it only has two single beds. How do they think they will sleep get lots of rest because first training day begins at 5 AM. I now think you have the picture it should be a mix of physical fitness training. Sexual education classes as well as hands on. mostly this is done in the buff at the beginning. They do get re-wards for achievements. Sexy clothes outfits toys and one on one dates. Hubbies are also allowed to visit twice a month and stay over night. He can spend night in the same bed with her and her sleep partner. If she does not please him maybe her partner will please him as she watches. The will be trained in everything sexual to include golden showers anal orgies BDSM Bi Dom and Sub.

They have to excel to get through this ordeal as it is rumored if the fail hubby can file for a divorce and they will be left penniless and sold as sex slaves.

I hope you find this a good starting point. I will love to read your finished work.

It should not always be play though as they will be made to work her as well laundry dining hall other needs of the camp.

I would love to do my mother years ago but at 61 i junk it's to late for that.would love to read all you write but am sure interested in knowing what happens in the club meet..If you write the others please let me know so I can read.thank out Gerry much... Totalled loved the story. I am very interested in finding me a female commie.....tbirdmarble@yahoo.com

A wonderful story, and it made me wish that it was me.

And to those complaining that it's 'unbelievable' or that the site is 'trailer trashy'. LO EFFING L. Do you mean 'unbelievable' as opposed to the completely 'believable' stories you see on TV, or at the movies? As far as 'Trashy', get a grip. Go read Harlequin if you're looking for 'vanilla' ho-hum. Watching paint dry would be more exciting than vanilla romance, to those of us who appreciate this site. It's called Literotica for a reason, it is erotic fiction. None are being forced to read anything here, nobody is paying a dime to read anything here. People who spend time on a site, (that fully explains up-front what it's about,) only to complain, are some of the lamest hypocrites on earth. Makes me wonder what they're getting out of it........hmmmmmmm

My prick wouldn't stop dripping as I read thru all three chapters. I hope you do another one seducing Tommy's mother. i would also love to see how Lucy and Kimberly get together. Will the son join in and become a sub to his sister ? I would love to hear about the son and mother made to eat each other at the daughters command. Maybe even have Tommy give the brother a blow job. Fucking great !

Your story is not believable and just soooooooo crappy.

Does every story on this site revolve around and is written by lowlife white trailer trash uneducated morons that don't know how to ; spell, use proper grammar, etc, etc, etc. How about reading some literature to hone those writing skills no ?

Omg that story was so fucking hot. Im only 14 but now realizing all of my fantasies. This story turned a straight girl into a pussy loving lesbian. Thank you 😍

Not fair, you used my two favorite fantasies to spread my legs again. We went to a catholic all girl school and that is where I found out how thrilling submission truly is. Loving other women is so wicked, The sounds and taste a younger women go perfectly with my need to dominated. The girls in my sorority used me. If my friends only knew how much I want to serve them. So wet now I looked through the comments wondering if donnaelize25 would like sitting back in the chair while I press my wet tongue over her beautiful clit. I would love to be on all fours serving you. Maybe kamperman would like kneeling behind me, that way both of you can use me.

Another wonderfully raunchy, kinky, thrillingly, sexy smutty slut story. You never leave me disappointed and my hand is wearing my dick off. ;O)

Really got into it. The mother, daughter, and son. Thanks, and please don't stop!

That story is so hot, my little clit has been dribbling since page 2. My hand has been in my panties and has made a great mess. It is so well written and keeps you interested. I will need to get my bullet before i read the next chapter. xx

I AGREE WITH EVERYONE THIS IS SOOOO HOT IT REALLY TURNED ME ON.

This was a well written story That turned me on.

VERY VERY HOT KEEP ON FUCKING

IF ANY ONE WANT TO FUCK ME LIKE THIS

I WILL KISS U

FROM

MRS DOLLA BAJPAI

You never disappoint. Loved it. Don't stop writing.

As usual J your stories are amazing.

This could be one hell of a movie.

Fucking hotttttttttttt

love your work!! Keep them coming.

another great story! keep up the good work :)

The way you write and how you describe the lesbian acts suggests that you have first hand experience and probably get off while writing these parts. If that picture in your bio is you I would like to fuck you in front of your husband. Is the rest of you as nice as your legs? I think your tits are small but that's the way I like them.

I'm looking forward to future adventures of Kim and her family and friends.

that was a very hot story. I loved it. I would love to meet a sexy hot teen with a naughty slutty mind like that. I would love to be her secret slave and get to see her dominate her mother and other women of the town.

Looking forward to all future editions and more.

You are an unbelievable writer. I jerk to your stories all day!

I DEMAND MORE!! I need more.... Please Mistress.

keep writing, you have something special. would love to see this story illustrated....

Something that the stocking slut hasn't done? I can't imagine there's much left under the sun that you haven't done or written about.

Hi all...

Part 2 is written and sent to the editors...it will be released in December once the Christmas contest is done.

I am also writing part 3 at the same time something I have not done before...

great story looking forward to others came several times

Great story! Truly enjoyed reading it. Would love to see another installment to this series.

I would love to see more and not have to wait a whole year.

You are one of the most talented writers here and when you begin a story of this quality and excitement, it seems surprising that you would stop. The only reason might be that you have so many more ideas rolling around in your mind but this one could be almost endless. You will make LOTS of folks happy if you find time and energy to keep this one going.

I have recently discovered this site and have already learned how delightful it is. I am fast becoming one of your biggest fans. I'm sure by mate would be too if he knew why I have been so hot and wet all the time lately. Keep up the great work. You are my inspiration.

I vote for 2 additional segments to "Oh", no make that 3 or 1 with 3 separate adventures. We just have to learn who all are in the housewife's club, Lucy and Kimberly alone, and of course the seduction of Tommy's own mother.

Love all your work especially the submissive seduction stories, mostly the lesbian themed.

I am a huge fan of your work. Please keep it up!!

just red this story after going through your gallery after reading your nude lesbian wrestling story, and loved it. I would love to see you follow up on it with those few idea's you commented on that we might see future.

what happens next? Does Ben join the fun?

what happens when Kimberly goes to an afternoon Housewives' Club?

what happens when Lucy gets Kimberly home alone?

That was an incredibly HOT read!! Damn you write a great story!! Really hope pure going to expand on these characters and take a dive down all three avenues you've suggested!!

I agree more with mom

I've just read your tasty tale, 05-2013, and wanted to take a moment to reply. I have submitted praise to well written and totally erotic stories as they are read so this is not a first for me.

I am so happy you take the time to write for us. The escape you provide cannot be overstated. This story could be expanded slightly and would make an excellent film, but not if it were done here in the USA. Too many ham fisted directors in this country would want to splash the screen with B - roll and miss out on translating the subtle motivations of your characters.

Good luck, and as to my thoughts on a future direction I'd like to see;

Submission Town: Cum Cum Lesbian Fun...what happens when Kimberly goes to an afternoon Housewives' Club?

cant wait to read the next one in this section

more

A nasty, depraved seduction of a sexually deprived woman into complete submission and debauchery. I would vote for "yes" to all three proposed chapters.

Please continue this story line I have never thought too much about incest but this has to be the hotest story I've ever read. Thank you and please keep them coming!

For me, it's the little depraved things like making her mother fuck herself with a candy cane that make this story so hot. I think I've read all your stores in like 2 days. Please keep writing.

Hello Ms. Silkstockingslover;

I have read many of your stories, have yet to vote on any of them, but I like reading them.

I would like to know there at the ending of this story the brother come in and discovers his mom, sister and friends all locked in the troues of passion. Cinthia asks, " Are you going to stand there with that dumb ass look on your face, or are you going to get out of those clothes and come and join us?"

I would like to know what the brother does?

Haave you written another chapter, that I can not find? Inquireing minds want to know!!

Excellent story, very well written. One suggestion for a future direction would be for Ben, after struggling to accept the situation, to turn the tables and dominate them all; leading to a power struggle between him and Tommy. Just a thought.

I cant wait to read more of this story. I look forward to Tommy's mom and possibly sisters falling as well.

i lots count of how many times i came over this story. I loved it

Please make more

I absolutely loved it what a pleasure to read such great story. Hope you have more in the of these soon.

If I'd known church was like this I'd have been going for years!

I have to say your stories are amazing and pure excitement to read !

you write all three?

I can't wait to read more! I hope Ben joins in with the fun

wow superbbbb.....it made me go crazy

A great story that was a great read, I think I'm going to have to release some tension in my trousrers though without my mom being around. My sister on the other hand....

Someone in the story said that she "runs the town". This makes me think of the film "THE Stepford Wives" (the variation on the original, in which it turns out to be the wives who are running things). So how about somewhere down the line there are sufficient wives in on this to actually run things - that could progress to the ultimate.... taking down the minister.

great story. to add to the excitement describe the mothers boots with 4 or5 in heels. makes it more interesting

I always try to read your work, because as I mentioned, you write the best sex scenes, but it almost never fails that somewhere in the story the fantasy "jumps the shark" to use a television term and my ability to suspend my disbelief comes crashing down.

"She runs this town." Oy freaking vey. Cinthia is about as subtle as that little girl who robbed that bank, then posted a video bragging about it on youtube.

Ah well, if I scroll past all the filler and just read the sex scenes the story is at least titillating to some degree. Reading all Cinthia's "masterful manipulations" just gives me a headache.

I'll give it a 4 though.

couldnt wait to read each next page and then didnt want each page to end and the ending DAMN the whole town must be in on this and so RESPECTABLE keep it wrong snake it alive :)

Would love to hear this in audio so far the best one on this site is Teaching Carol and your stories NEED AUDIO

fellow Canadian

I don't think I have ever read a story with so many possible follow-up stories.

gotta be part 2 where mommy and daughter get their ass done she also has to be the main piece at one of the housewives parties

I stopped reading when I came to this town: ""Harder Tommy. Slam that big snake of yours all the way in me."

Just too trite for me. This was not up to your usual standards.

You should do oh submission town : best friends. Can't wait to read to see what lucy does when she gets Kim alone

Loved it but then again from you as an author that doesnt shock me. I dont mind where this goes next as long as it keeps going :)

Meh. The story was rushed, the plot devices pretty tired and over-used for this genre; the same can be said for the flat, stock BDSM characters--not your best work. If all you wanted was a wank, this fic is more than serviceable for people into submission kinks. Beyond that, there isn't anything particularly remarkable or outstanding about it, especially compared to some of your other works.

And as a submission for the Holiday/X-mas contest the Holidays/X-mas aren't central to the story or themes. This could be any time of the year, not just xmas, and have the same effect/outcomes for your plot.

I would personally prefer one of the lesbian options, but that's just my thing. The way it ends, it has to involve the son character in one way or another, but after that, some lezzy fun would be nice.

Now, the daughter mentioned that her father is also dominant and she's seen his penis. Are we to assume there's something going on between them too?

Loved the story! My vote for the next installment is this one: "Oh" Submission Town: Cum Cum Lesbian Fun...what happens when Kimberly goes to an afternoon Housewives' Club?"

...Once again. Keep up the good work!

Is there a second part? You're an amazing writer with amazing stockinged legs...

love the story and that it was left open for others. I personaly would like to see a pre story of the students and teachers( members of the existing club).

Very good, well written, exciting, yet the story lacks the tension that would come from greater resistance from Kimberly. It must be shocking for her to be under her daughter's control, yet her resistance is almost nothing. She is too easily caught up, too easily seduced. So I urge you forward, to probe more deeply into erotic domination, to move one or two steps closer to what might actually happen, to engage, head on, the resistance that would actually occur. All in the name of eroticism, of course. So very fine writing that could develop into something more--more realistic and more erotic.

-- A professional writer.