Once a Bully, Always a Bully… Pt. 06

As the working week went by, I put forth a maximum effort to approach my situation from a new angle. Instead of reluctantly playing along, I decided I would focus on giving into becoming what he insisted I was. I first started by researching the subject more. I knew that in a world so large, he couldn't be the only one that believed in this twisted version of an alpha beta dynamic. I figured that if someone had made those chastity devices like the one I was wearing, it could only mean that there had to be a market for them.

I came to find out that this was very much an active lifestyle that people were participating in. There were pornography websites and blogs dedicated to the lifestyle of men feminizing other men for their pleasure. For the most part, this community was built up of eager "sissies." These sissies didn't seem to be in the same situation that I was though. Most of them were just single men dressing up on their own and dreaming of serving an alpha male. James had clearly thought of me to be one of these men, and while I first didn't feel like there were any similarities, I ended up finding evidence to support James' claim. A lot of these men actually claimed to be completely straight, but stumbled into the lifestyle by accident. For instance, a slight brush with the idea of switching gender roles for sexual purposes eventually turned into them actually dressing up for men and pleasing them. They had all eventually been hypnotized by the idea.

The biggest game changer for me was when I read that a lot of these "sissy" men had found themselves accidentally getting hard or pre-cumming to the idea of wearing the lingerie or outfits that they would see on women. Or sometimes just walking by a lingeries shop and briefly wondering what it would be like to wear those things. That in turn caused them to question their sexuality and eventually led to them giving into the desire to try it. I certainly couldn't deny that when I dressed up, it made me feel a certain way inside.

As I did my research and looked at all the different daddy/sissy pornography out there, I couldn't help but feel aroused. I decided that if I was going to change my mindset about my situation, diving into this "rabbit hole"--as they called it--was the best way to go. Some of the posts and stories I read were degrading and perverted, but surprisingly enough, I found a few blogs about embracing the sissy nature. They talk about methods to clear your mind from what society says you shouldn't think or feel as a man, and learn to love yourself as a beta femme. Another blog I got into talked about the importance of the "daddy" role and how special it was to have a strong alpha male guiding you through the journey.

One of the biggest steps I took in this mental transformation was to no longer see this man as James, the bully, but to recognize him simply as "Daddy." I had convinced myself that Daddy only bullied me in middle school because he was trying to help me discover my true nature. I told myself that I should be grateful for his return and helping me see that I was headed down the wrong path. Although I was still questioning why he had to spank and slap me around so much. Then again, a lot of people online were talking about their daddies being no-nonsense disciplinarians. Despite the pain and the fear that they constantly dealt with from that, they appreciated their daddies for keeping them in line. In a few chats I had with other sissies, some of them said they wouldn't be able to fully embrace their true role without the discipline element.

I knew that the road to accepting my role as a sissy was going to be long, but I was determined. I came to the conclusion that one of two things would happen: I would either learn to love being a submissive sex slave, or perhaps he wouldn't be interested in me if I was so willing. I figured there was a chance that he only liked using me because I didn't want it. One thing was for sure, defying or fighting him wasn't going to work, and running away wasn't going to work either since he had blackmail on me. The way I saw it, there were two paths that would lead to success and both of them required me to learn to like it.

While I wasn't entirely sure what the distant future had in store for me, I knew for certain that the next day I had off would be the day that I lost my anal virginity. I practiced with my dildo multiple times a day. It hurt each and every time, but clearly I was enjoying it on some level because my chastity device would be sticky from pre-cum every single time. It also wasn't a normal type of pain, it was more like a feeling of being violated. Either way, I taught myself how to relax the best that I could.

Finally, after much practice, the day had arrived. Daddy wasn't going to be over until the evening but just like Christmas morning as a kid, I couldn't stay asleep the night before. So I just woke up early and got to work getting ready; making sure I was as smooth as can be from head to toe. There were a couple outfits I was saving, but one in particular had been calling me and I knew it would be the right choice for the day. I had seen a lot of sissies on websites wearing something like this. It was a shiny PVC maid style dress. There were white lace ruffles all over and the PVC layer was all pink, which had a shiny wet look to it. Based on pictures I had seen online, I knew that I needed something to make the hem flare out, so I put on a fluffy white petticoat to go underneath.

Thick, white, patterned thigh high stockings were an obvious choice, with lolita style ruffled socks. Then to top it off, I had some matching pink Mary Janes with heels. I was getting better at walking in high heels and I wanted to show him my improvement. My panties, bra, and garter belt were all satin white with ruffled edges as well. The wig I chose was blonde with pink streaks. I parted it in two with partial pigtails and two thin strands on each side in the front. As a bonus, the outfit came with a cute headband that had a satin bow on it. That day, I had spent nearly two hours just on my makeup--I wanted to look like a porcelain doll. I used glitter and bright pink lip gloss. I extended my eyelashes and made sure I was as girly as could be.

Once I was finished dressing, I took a hard look in the mirror at my work. I was totally convinced that if I had gone outside like that, no one would have the slightest suspicion that I wasn't a girl. I took plenty of pictures for my own keeping. After all, I was proud of my work. Plus, I knew it wasn't going to be long before Daddy showed up and ruined my makeup in some way like he always did.

I spent the rest of the time I had waiting on him, to practice my walking, sitting, and even worked on my speech a little. I also made sure I was clean down there and very well lubed up. I didn't want to give him any reason to be upset with me. The welts on my buttcheeks had almost faded but still presented me with a warning of what could go wrong if I didn't behave the way he wanted me to. I was as ready as could be.

The sun had gone down when I finally heard from Daddy. He texted me, "running a little late, but I am done with work for the day and very horny. I expect my little sissy girl has been anticipating my arrival, and is ready for a long evening!"

My heart was racing, and soon enough, I heard that--now familiar--strong knock on the door. I took a few deep breaths and told myself not to be scared, and to do whatever it took to embrace what was about to happen. I unlocked the door and greeted Daddy on my knees.

For the first time ever, I caught a glimpse of a pleased look on his face. He turned to lock the door, and signaled me to stand for inspection. He felt around my dress, inspected my makeup, and lifted the petticoat to see my panties. He grinned with excitement, but I did my best to hide that I could sense it. Finally, he spoke: "Well well well, my haven't you come a long way. What happened to that masculine wannabe I knew in middle school?"

I replied in a girly voice, "he's gone Daddy."

"Judging by your efforts and the fact that your bottom is still marked up a little, I'd say someone has learned their lesson from last week."

"Yes Daddy, I have, and I'm ready to be a good girl now," I replied with the face of an innocent puppy.

He lightly gripped onto my chastity device and spoke in a light voice, "well why don't you be a good sissy girl and grab Daddy something to drink. You can grab a wine cooler or something fruity for yourself."

"Of course Daddy," I replied and then walked to the refrigerator in the most feminine way I could. He was giving me the opportunity to show him that I could walk in heels, and as I returned with his beer, I could see that he was impressed. I felt a primal energy in the air as he looked me up and down. There was certainly a sense of pride I felt for making him desire me in some way, but I couldn't help but notice a particularly dangerous look in his eyes. One that indicated clearly that at some point, he was going to have his way with me and show me who's in charge.

After a brief hesitation, he grabbed his backpack and sat on the couch. "Come kneel next to me whore," he demanded as he pointed to the floor in front of the couch. I continued my strut and then dropped to my knees at his side. He reached into his backpack and grabbed a pink leather collar. "Hands behind your head," he instructed, and I quickly obliged. Then he wrapped the collar around my neck, buckled it in and placed a small padlock through the loop. I couldn't see where he placed the key afterwards but it was out of sight. He reached into the bag again and grabbed a matching leash which he attached to a circular loop in the front of the collar. He wrapped the handle around his wrist and then laid back to enjoy his beer. The football game was on TV but it was nearly finished. He was a little disappointed that he missed most of it while being stuck at work.

Eventually, the game had come to an end. He chugged the rest of his beer and set it on the side table. Then he stood up and gave the leash two quick little tugs. "Come on sissy, let's go to the bedroom." I crawled on my hands and knees but it was hard to keep up. He kept pulling on the leash to signal for me to crawl faster. It choked me

a little, but I could still handle it.

When we got to the bedroom, he sat at the edge of his bed in his business casual khakis and pointed to his belt. I reached for it with my hands and unbuckled it. At this point, I knew that unbuckling his belt was a power move which meant one of two things: I was either pulling his pants down to suck his cock, or I was going to get a spanking. He didn't seem upset with me though, so I assumed it was the former. I started to grab his zipper, but he stopped me, "take the belt off," he insisted. I swallowed nervously and pulled the belt past the loops. He grabbed it from me, folded it in half, and held it in front of my face. "Do you remember what happened the last time you saw this belt?"

"Yes Daddy," I responded nervously.

"Good, you don't want to forget these valuable lessons."

"I won't forget it Daddy, and I definitely learned my lesson," I told him.

He replied, "for your sake, I hope you're right, but just in case, go ahead and carry it with your mouth over to the nightstand and set it down. That way if we need it for any reason tonight, it'll be close by."

I wrapped my mouth around the folded belt and crawled over to the nightstand to set it down as instructed, then I returned back in front of him. I looked up at him awaiting his next instruction. "You know what to do next, sissy," he said.

I reached for his pants and pulled down his zipper. Then I wiggled his pants down to his ankles and slid them off one leg at a time. I brought my hands back up to grab his boxers, but he stopped me. "Not yet," he said. "Stand up first," he instructed.

I stood up with my knees together and with both hands overlapping above my pelvis. I had read online that this pose was one of many submissive poses. He gestured with his finger to turn around, to which I obliged. He lifted the hem of my dress and began fondling my butt cheeks. At times, he would grip it tightly or fit as much of it as he could in one fistful. Eventually he pulled me down by the waist and positioned me so I was sitting on his lap. He grasped onto my hips, and started pushing me back and forth. I could tell that he wanted me to grind on him a little, so I gave into the movements of his hands and began gyrating my hips and rubbing my bottom on his crotch. My dress was lifted from the back, so the only thing between my bottom and his penis were his boxers and my panties. His bulge rested perfectly between my cheeks and I felt as he slowly went from flaccid to a strong chub. I continued giving him this subtle lap dance for about five to ten minutes, then he ordered me to get back down on my knees and get this cock nice and hard.

I assumed a kneeling pose and positioned myself right between his legs to where his bulge was perfectly placed in front of my face. I teased him a little at first, gently rubbing my face alongside his shaft, which was still trapped in his boxers. Occasionally, I opened my mouth as though I was going to suck through the fabric but then continued caressing. I snuck my hand through the opening for his leg. I reached inside and rested his balls in my palm. With my other hand, I reached into the slit in the front of his boxers and pulled his shaft out through the hole. Once it was completely out, I began to stroke it. As I continued with this sensual hand job, I occasionally threw in a soft kiss on the side of his shaft and the head of his penis. At the same time, I Iooked straight up into his eyes with the expression of a desperate puppy. This made him start throbbing, and he became rock hard.

Eventually, he brought up the inevitable. "Are you good and lubed up sissy?"

I nervously replied, "yes Daddy."

"Very good, sissy. Now here's what I want you to do: stand up and crawl onto the bed, positioning yourself on your knees and elbows, facing the headboard."

"Yes Daddy," I replied, and did as instructed, making sure I kept my back arched the way he liked it. He then got on the bed behind me and lifted the hem of my dress and petticoat up to my waist; grabbed my ass a few times; and then slowly pulled my panties down my thighs, exposing my bottom. Slowly and carefully, he removed my butt plug. I could feel that when it finally came out, some of the lube that I had stored up there was oozing out. I used a liberal amount of lube that time, just to be on the safe side.

After the plug was removed, he stood back up off the bed and walked over to the nightstand to set the plug down. Then he took off the rest of his clothes. The amount of light in the room was dim, but in my peripheral view, I could see the shadows of his muscular, hairy chest, and his large alpha cock standing fully erect. I began to shake nervously as he made his way back behind me.

Once he was back into position behind me, he began to ask me some questions: "Are you ready for what comes next, sissy?"

"Yes Daddy," I replied.

"Are you still a virgin, sissy? Meaning, has any man deflowered you by means of penetration."

"No Daddy."

"Good, and you are ready and willing for me to take that from you?"

"Yes, Daddy," I replied, getting more and more nervous, and on the verge of tears, faced with the reality of what was happening. Nonetheless, I had made my choice. Even though I technically didn't have a choice, other than to face something worse, I still felt as though it was my decision to make, and that somewhere deep down, I wanted it.

"Now listen carefully, you need to know that once I, an alpha male, take the virginity of a beta like yourself, that socially, there really is no going back. You will be stripped of your manhood. This means you will no longer have the right to call yourself a man, and you will join an inferior class of beta sissies that live to serve men like me. Since I am the one who will rid you of this masculine burden that you carry, you will pledge yourself to me, and I will be your owner. Any other alpha male will recognize that I am the one that broke you, and will respect me as your true superior. Are you ready to accept that as your future? And are you willing to give yourself to me completely?"

As he asked his final question, he began stroking himself in one hand and lightly prodding at my hole with his finger. I took a deep breath and sighed, "yes Daddy, I accept it, and I am yours to take."

"Good, and don't worry, if you have any doubt now, I can promise you that by the time we are done here, you will never question your true nature again." And after that final statement, he began. He pulled my left butt cheek to the side with one hand, and held the end of his shaft in his other. I felt the soft head of his penis begin to press up against my hole.

Luckily, he was more than delicate at first. He would apply a small amount of pressure and then retreat a little. occasionally he would completely pull out and just tap the tip on my hole a few times. That actually caused me to relax and open up a bit. The more I opened up, the more lube had been pushed to the opening, which allowed him to begin sliding in with ease. Every couple of seconds though, I would tense up, and he would pull back a little. In a soft voice, he'd encourage me. "relax sissy, just relax. I know it hurts, but if you can just stay relaxed, you'll be okay."

I took his advice, and slowly but surely, I was able to ease up a bit. Instead of tensing up my hole, I curled my fingers, and let out some soft moans. It was certainly thicker than my dildo, but at the same time, it was softer and felt much more natural. It took a few minutes for me to fully relax, and once I opened up enough to fit the thickness of it, he pushed the rest of it in. I had no idea he had that much more length to go, and when it pressed hard against my prostate, my eyes lit up instantly and my elbows collapsed; I was in complete shock. I let out a loud moan, "whoahhh!!!"

"There you go, sissy, let it take over you. Don't resist that blissful feeling," he told me.

He pulled back and pushed in a second time. I quickly reached for a pillow and hugged it tight under my chest. Then on the third pump he went hard and deep. "woahhh my god!!!" I called out as my eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. The feeling was intense, and left me feeling brain dead at the same time. I felt totally violated, but blissful the entire time as though it were some kind of high. It hurt, but not necessarily in a bad way, it just felt wrong. I didn't fight it though. Instead, I took the initiative to begin moving back and forth. For one, I figured he would see it as a dedication, but it also gave me the ability to control the pace.

"Ya, you like that, don't you bitch," he said.

I moaned out, "Yes Daddy."

"Good girl," he moaned back. "put your back into it, sissy."

"Yes Daddy," I called out as I began working my ass harder and faster.

He moaned some more, "that's it, free yourself of your burden. Stop pretending to be something you're not and give into your true role."

He slowly began to match my motion and everytime I pushed back, he grabbed my waist and held me close, pushing in as deep as he could. Every single time he did that, my eyelids fluttered and my arms would shake uncontrollably. As he picked up the speed more and more, he started giving my butt cheeks several barehanded slaps. "Ya, you're Daddy's bitch now, aren't you?" he said degradingly.

I replied in an odd sense of pain and pleasure, "ohh yes Daddy."

He slapped my ass hard, "say it!"

"I'm Daddy's bitch!"

He hooked his finger around my mouth, "who's holes are these?"