All Comments on 'Once Bitten'

A straight right to the jaw! Bam! Powerfully executed story pared to its most vital elements.

Bye, bye patty. Good riddance

'Shouldn't make threat un public like that - if anything happens to Patrick, he wouldn't be the first suspect.

Everything else is understandable. Weird to have to remind this at all, but continuous pointless fighting with your spouse is one of the most well known red flag out there, especially if said spouse is a known cheater.

Shouldn't have take her back... but, at least, he got a postnup. Thanks for the share, author.

A great 750 story. Definitely one that begs to be expanded.

Your days are numbered? Too specific. You gotta say something that sounds good if you don't know the intent, like 'Every day's a blessing!' or 'give Grandma a hug.' I've been told to 'Be a family man' by someone before, but karma did him bad. Leave family out of everything. Much nicer that way... What was I saying again? Oh! Perfect story otherwise.

Excellent 750.

750????

This needs and must have 7,500 or much higher in the thousands!

Great start, but we’re left hanging.

Please…..

Sometimes I like them short. Thank you, you told us all we need to know.

Damn dude that was one of the best opening pages I have ever read, seriously I hope you consider continuing the story so much said in such a short styory though

A nice little story; clearly focussed and covering the essentials. I know what is happening and I don't need any more detail (both signs of a strong 750-worder). Thank you.

I can understand writing a 750-word story as part of an event, I've done so myself. What I DON'T understand is setting an arbitrary limit for no reason. Write your story. If it's 800 words, why cut out 50 "just because?"

If that was not the best 750 word story I have read on this site it was top two or three. This was exactly what you expect from a concise by intention story. Well done. I very rarely ever give a 5 star and don't even consider it for the short ones but you wrote a fantastic tale here with great precision using such a small amount or words.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

Good start, keep going with it. LP

Screams for "the rest of the story".

Amazingly well done. So much in so few words.

Great 750 word story. This would be a great opening chapter for a finish the story challenge

finish the dam story

Ignore the “finish the damn story” comments. You made it very clear this was a 750 challenge. I liked the idea for the scene, but for some reason, I didn’t feel the MCs emotion. It’s not easy to do with the limited challenge, I know, but that’s what I use to gauge these types of stories. Still 4/5 for me. Better than average, just not the cream.

Very short, and very good. I would like to read about Patrick’s downfall though.

Ignore the negative e comments. This was an excellent 750 word story and contained so much within such a limited format.

Good story so far but needs more flesh....too abrupt

5 stars - I'm tempted to drop to 4 stars because given details in the story, he should have had proactive measures to monitor the cunt; but still 5 because he had the brains to do the post-nup.

So far so good. A no-nonsense/ no- lying to guy. 4 stars, looking forward to the next part. Bob

As a PS to my comment below: there's no indication on the time frame between his wife's affair & this coffee shop confrontation. In the story, a few words could've been either eliminated or combined (abbreviated to form 1 word in-stead of 2 or more) to allow that. I can understand the 750 word project is hard, & every word must count. Still a good story, I'm keeping my 4 stars, & beginning the next part. Bob

What is it with these brain-dead commentors.

Read my lips (or BlueGee's)...

750 WORD PROJECT.

That said, not another word needed to be added anyway. The story is complete in the telling.

Well done, BlueGee, it didn't feel forced, and it didn't feel like there was anything lacking. You built a complete narrative, brought the action, and delivered the outcome.

Author after author recounts how they tried to do it in 750 words and failed.

5 stars... for setting the scene, creating the tension, and delivering a comprehensive conclusion, all of which were enough in themselves, but even moreso for getting it done under this challenge.

Between you and I (and anyone else reading this comment), anyone who thinks otherwise is a wanker.

Bang! And they're toast. Brilliant short story that told us everything we needed to know. Very well done 👏 BardnotBard

I know this was a 750 word story but it could have been a start of much more

OMG... that was close to being a btb. Never expected that here.

Well done ... 5/5

great start but i really want more!

good reaction to a bad situation

me encantó, podrias ampliarlo

You could have made a story out of this. Hitting the 750 word goal generally equals a non-pleasing read.

I would like a 750 word story where Patrick’s number is up. Another great story.

Good job! This actually reflects reality quite well. Years ago, when I first visited the survivinginfidelity website, I was amazed at the rate of recidivism among cheaters. One reads stories here of wives begging for the second chance that is never given. Less often, one reads stories of the successful reconciliations with the cheaters. But what happens more often than the latter are the attempted reconciliations that lead to this exact kind of situation: the cheater’s inability to give up the affair partner. Daily, I read accounts of the continued pain of the betrayed spouse, because, despite the pleas for reconciliation, pressure from family and friends, especially when children were involved (as in this story), and even counseling, the affair partner was like a drug the cheater could not quit.