Our Air B&B Adventure

Air B&B.

A short story about two couples on a weekend break.

The A303 was a bloody nightmare, we had been on this poxy road for nearly three hours. I had hoped to get there before 5pm but at this rate it would be much later.

Carol and Max, our friends from Maddie's preschool were curled up in the backseat dead to the world under a woolen travel blanket. Meryle, my wife of seven years was busily snoring beside me in the passenger seat.

We had all palmed off the kids to our respective grandparents for a long weekend in Bude, Cornwall. I was so looking forward to hitting the surf, it had been eight long years since I had been down there.

Max was a keen swimmer but had never been on a board, I promised I would get him upright before the weekend was over.

The Air-B&B cottage was set up high on the cliffs overlooking the bay with what I remember was gorgeous garden for sun-worshipers, it also had a private old cobbled path down to the beach so was very secluded. We had all been away together last year to Menorca with the children, so we were used to each-others company and the ladies went topless there. The garden would be perfect if they wanted that all over tan again, I am pretty sure neither myself or Max would voice an objection too loudly.

It was a long drive and had been on the road from Yarmouth for the last six and a half hours and I needed a break from the driving. A small roadside café done up like an American diner looked inviting so I pulled into the gravel carpark, the rumbling of the grit below the tyres woke the motley crew.

"Are we here?" asked my wife groggily.

"No, I needed a coffee and maybe a bite to eat."

"Great idea Martin." Carol chipped in from the rear already shedding the blanket and opening the door. "I am dying for a pee."

With that she ran toward the café holding her hand between her thighs leaving us to trail behind.

The Bacon and eggs went down a treat and with a couple of coffees, the girls had croissants and Max had the biggest piece of apple pie I had ever laid my eyes upon. I was ready to hit the road again after a quick pee myself and a glance at the phone said we had about three hours ahead of us, but knowing where we were headed I so knew it would be worth the trip.

It took all of fifteen minutes for Meryle's familiar snore to reappear, I flicked my eyes up to the rearview mirror to see our friends cuddled up again in the back. scrolling through the radio channels, the dulcet tones of Matt Monro and Days Like These came through the speakers. It was one of my all-time favourite tunes.

I resisted as long as I could but my inner Matt came rising to the surface and I burst into my best rendition of the Italian song. Singing along at the top of my very mediocre at best, quite shit at worst, singing voice. I was encouraged by cheers and applause from the backseat much to the annoyance of my newly awakened wife. I felt her hand on my thigh but the nice sensation ended rather abruptly when I felt her nails sinking into the exposed flesh beneath my shorts. I took that as her way of saying "Shut it," to which I did.

Again it took her mere minutes to drift off. I thought I could hear giggling from behind, so I adjusted the mirror to see what they were so jovial about. My gaze was met by Carol staring back at me, I nodded silently and she smiled back.

"No, no we shouldn't," I heard Max whisper under his breath.

I have a small button on my steering wheel to adjust the sound of the music so I turned it down a touch, just to be nosey and hopefully hear more.

I glanced up again at the mirror, Carol had a strange look on her face. She looked at me, then down, again at me, then again down. I heard Max make a small groan, surely not I thought.

"Shhhh" I heard her say.

I heard a slight rustling sound now and I tried to adjust the mirror a bit more but it would not get to the position I required so I brought it back up to Carols face. She inserted a finger into her mouth as she stared right back at me.

Oh god this was wrong, so wrong, but it was so fucking sexy if they were doing what in my mind I envisioned them doing.

She again looked down, and her finger followed to where her gaze was.

"Fuck," I breathed.

My mind was doing overtime, I twisted my neck to quickly look but they had that damned blanket back in place. I could not look back properly because there was too much heavy traffic but I was sure she was giving her husband a hand-job, just mere inches from us.

I peered cautiously sideways to see my wife oblivious and still sleeping.

Carol was staring straight back at me smiling now as she carried on doing whatever she was doing back there. Max was doing his best to keep silent but I heard the odd gasp here and there and once he even kicked his foot into the back of my chair.

Carol winked at me and she moved slightly sideways, I was disappointed that she had moved from my vision but then I saw her head drop too.

Fuck, she was sucking him! In our car, with us in it!

Meryle was still out cold, her snoring was masking the slurping sound from the back seat. I had to adjust the rock hard cock in my pants because it was getting very uncomfortable.

I was sure I had caught the pair fucking on our last holiday but they just laughed it off, so did I at the time but this, this was a very different kettle of fish. This was almost like, in your face, deal with it!

I felt a kick to my chair again and Carol sat back upright in her seat. Her eyes were peering into my soul as they met mine in the rearview mirror, she wiped her wet lips with a finger and sucked it between her moist red lips. Fuck, I felt light-headed at her brazened actions.

I heard a grunt from beside me, Meryle was stirring.

"How much farther?"

Now she fucking wakes up, I thought to myself.

"Not much," I answered. "We just passed over Bideford Bridge a few miles back, so about half hour I spose."

"Good, I need to freshen up. I have a bad taste in my mouth." Carol laughed from the backseat.

"So do I." My wife said, "Do you have any mints love?" looking in my direction questioningly.

I fished a pack of Wrigley's from my pocket handing them to her, she took a couple handing one back to her friend.

"Thanks." She said with a smile.

******************************************************************

The narrow winding lane wormed its way around the top of the cliff face as we approached the cottage, just enough for one car. It was more of a dirt track and hardly used by anyone as there were only three cottages in this part of Bude, like I said it is very secluded.

We pulled offroad and into the small frontage and it was just as I remembered it. The sun was peeking just over the old thatched roof, the trees sending shadows up to and far beyond us. The place looked stunning.

Getting out first, I had the chance to completely move my poor dick into a much more comfortable position before it could be noticed. It had been hard for the last twenty miles and I am sure Carol gave me a sly wink as I did it.

As I lifted the rear door of the car to get the cases I felt Carols hand on my butt-cheek, she squeezed it softly saying, "Can I give you a hand, I am good with my hands."

It flustered me and I coughed feeling myself redden under my collar.

She grabbed her case and strode off as if nothing had happened leaving me stunned. This had all the makings of a very eventful holiday.

The cottage had been renovated since my last time here, there was a wood burner in the lounge which was new, a brand new kitchen with sliding doors that led onto a patio area with a huge BBQ area. Six sunbeds were strewn about in various locations on the lawn and a large family size jacuzzi type plunge-pool. It had certainly changed for the better since my bachelor days surfing here.

The girls made their way to the picket fence at the end of the garden to admire the stunning sea views.

"Martin, this place is amazing, it is everything you promised it would be." My wife turned and smiled broadly.

"Right, lets get unpacked and choose the sleeping arrangements. Its coming up to 7pm and by the time we have freshened up and dressed, we might just get time for a few drinks or some food down in the town." I ventured.

Myself and Meryle took the front bedroom leaving the other two to have the bedroom that led directly onto the garden by French doors.

Friday evening was rammed down in the town and it looked like our only chance of food was pub-grub or a takeaway. We found a lovely little pub in one of the backstreets, real Cornish ale, dark tables, open fire, that type of place.

Before we knew it, it was last orders so we had one last pint and made our way up the hill to our holiday home. I was shattered after a few drinks and that long drive so I hit the sack almost the instant we walked in the door leaving my wife and friends to chat over the coming days events.

The next morning I was awoken to the sounds and smells coming from the kitchen, the two girls were busy making a Full English for everyone. They had found chefs aprons in one of the cupboards and as I walked in I did not know where to put my eyes. They had both tied them at the back but they showed everything from neck to toes, both had on black thongs. I mean don't get me wrong, the sight was fucking awesome but this was my wife on show here.

"Merl, don't you think you better cover up?" I asked.

"Oh, be cool love, we are on holiday and besides this is my bikini bottom. I will be wearing this on the beach for everyone to see later!"

I let it slide but I did feel a little uncomfortable with Max leering at my wife's ass as she grilled the bacon.

After breakfast I took him down the old path to the beach to source a couple of boards, they were reasonably cheap at £35.00p for four hours. We took two and hit the waves, Max was a natural with no fear at all. By the end of our allotted time he was almost on his feet and he loved it wanting to add more time.

"We cant mate, you promised the girls we would go shopping this afternoon remember, you sorted it last night so its your bloody fault." I said with a smile.

We spent the whole afternoon trudging from one boutique to another, endless shoe shops with them trying on every bloody style in the place.

"Thanks for this." Meryle said, "I will make it up to you tonight, I promise." Holding my arm tight and looking up to me coyly with a twinkle in her eyes.

Ok, it might be worth it, I thought to myself.

Somehow myself and Max ended up with armfuls of shopping bags full of clothes, shoes, bags and a few board games while the girls walked carefree in front of us arm in arm.

Eventually we made it to the cottage and fired up the barbecue.

Max took the helm and as he worked in a pro kitchen it seemed only right to let him show off.

I have to say, the steaks were the best I had ever had. He cooked up some shrimp concoction that wouldn't be out of place in a Michelin star restaurant, he was a magician.

I sat back on my lounger absolutely stuffed, I could not eat another bite. It was even a struggle getting a beer down after that feast.

"Board games!" came the cry from the ladies.

"Give us half hour babe, I cant bloody move." I whined pointing at my bloated stomach.

"Ok, but no more than that. We will set up the Trivial Pursuit."

With that, both girls disappeared indoors to reappear ten minutes later with 2-3 board games under arm. They had changed too, Merl had a longer maxi type skirt and cardigan on now. Carol in much the same attire, I felt overdressed in my board shorts and T-shirt. I looked around for Max, he had gone in and come back out in jeans.

I gave him a quizzical look to be told, "Well, it is getting a little chilly now."

"Wooses!" I laughed.

Carol set up the Trivial Pursuit for four players and we set about the game, Max threw me a beer and it was a great way to spend the evening. I lit up the fire-pit and we were set for the night playing old-style board games and drinking.

Carol won the first game with me a close second, I should've won but for a couple of easy questions I got wrong.

"Monopoly?" asked Merl, pointing at it.

"No, lets have another game of this. I love this game," Carol chipped in. "Plus I think your hubby thinks he should've won that last one, ha, ha."

She was right, I should've won it, I was shit-hot at general knowledge and disappointed that I had lost.

"Ok, this again," said Max.

We all nodded affirmative.

"But," he added. "With consequences and forfeits."

"What type of forfeits?" I asked.

He looked thoughtful for a minute, stood and got four more beers tossing one to each of us and with a huge grin on his face blurted out,

"Strip Trivial Pursuits!" laughing his ass off.

The girls loved the idea.

"Hang on a second ladies," I said a bit worried, "I think Max was having a joke."

"No, it's a great idea." Screamed my wife excitedly.

"No, seriously, I mean, "I said, pointing to my own attire." Even more worried now. "Shorts, T-shirt, flipflops, c'mon hun."

"Scared?" she replied sarcastically, "After all, you said you should've won the last game?"

"Ok, I'm in." Said Carol clapping her hands like a demented seal.

"Only a slight change of rules this time," Max said. "To make it fair, we ALL answer each of the questions and whoever gets the wrong answer takes off an item, fair? That way it's an even chance, plus when a player gets all six cheeses they get to set the forfeit to any player they choose."

Fuck me, he had really thought this through, but I liked that idea and I would definitely win this one. "Ok, but let me at least put on some trousers."

"Ok", they said as one.

When I got back the board was set with more beers in place and a few snacks.

"Ok suckers, let the game commence." I said, gleefully rubbing my hands together.

*******************************************************

The game.

Carol won the dice roll-off with a five so she went first.

Her first roll landed on literature, she took a question tile and asked,

"Ok, Which fairytale is found in almost every culture and language?"

Easy I thought, little red riding hood. "How do we answer, say it or write it down so no-one copies?" I said, I really wanted to win this and didn't want anyone copying my answers.

"Er, ok. I hadn't thought of this." Said Max, "Carol, can you get us all a pen and paper please love."

Two minutes later we were all busy scribbling our answers and handed them to Carol.

"Ok," she said dramatically. "Max says Cinderella,"

I laughed out loud.

She continued, "Meryle says," then after dramatic pause. "Another Cinderella."

She unwrapped my answer, "Martin says, hmmmm, Little Red Riding Hood.....so that's two for Cinders and one for Red. My answer is" she unwrapped her paper showing it around, "Cinderella!"

Now even I was having doubts.

She slowly turned over the card to the answers and her face dropped,

"HA! YES, I knew it ha, ha, its red riding hood right?"

"No Martin." She handed me the card with a grin. "Cinders!"

"Fuck it!" I swore, "Fuck it, it did say Cinderella, I was positive I would be right. I looked up to see three joyful faces.

"Bollocks," I said grumpily. "Ok, ok." I stood and took off my T-shirt to cheers from the girls. Taking my place back at the board I rolled my turn.

Again, literature. "What was the name of Agatha Christies most famous detective."

Easy, I thought. We all scribbled our answers. Shit, I thought as I looked at Max's answer.

"Ok. Max says Poirot, Carol, the same. Shit ok, Merl has Hercule Poirot too. And me look."

I showed all the answers, "it's a tie. Next throw."

Meryle was next and landed on Geography, at least I knew she would fuck this one up. She is shit at this kind of general knowledge stuff.

"True or false, The Sahara is the world's biggest desert?"

Well this one was obviously true, the Sahara is huge. Again we wrote our answers and handed them over.

"Martin, True. Carol False."

"YESSSSS I hissed." Punching the air.

"Me, false. Max, false." She said.

"YESSSS, get em off everyone I yelled."

Merl slowly turned the card and said, "False."

I grabbed it scanning it over to see, false, the biggest desert is The Antarctic. "For fuck sake!"

How the fucking hell did they all know that?

"Off, Off, Off." They chanted together. Again I stood and took off the jeans that I had only just put on.

"Can you get us some more beers while you are up love?" Merl asked me with a face wide grin.

I stood in my boxers and flipflops and trudged angrily to the counter handing them out.

Max was next and landed on Entertainment.

"What was the first Netflix show to win an Emmy?"

Shit, I had no idea, fuck! I was down to my boxers and these fuckers were all still fully clothed, I had to get this one right. My mind went totally blank, I had nothing. For some reason Breaking Bad popped in from nowhere, yes, that must be it.

Max opened the papers one by one. "Carol, House of Cards. Max, House of Cards. Martin, Breaking bad."

Bollocks, I had a bad feeling about this one too.

"Meryle, another......House of cards."

Sure enough, fucking bastard House of fucking cards!

What the fuck was going on here? I am brilliant at the general knowledge games for fuck sake and these are all usually shit!

"Off, Off, Off" came that poxy fucking chant again, they all sat there chinking their beer bottles together as I shucked off my flipflops.

"Aw, not the boxer shorts Martin?" Carol said in a whiny disappointed voice.

I was in deep trouble now, how were they getting them right and I was so fucking wrong?

We carried on for another 30 mins or so and I was lucky enough not to lose anymore, mostly we all got the answers wrong but were now all in a state of undress, but I was still the worst off by a long way. Everyone had collected a few cheese wedges but and Carol had five, she had only one more to collect.

Meryle landed on Geography.

"What was built first, Panama Canal or Eiffel Tower?"

Fuck, it's a 50-50 again I had no idea. It must be Panama....or it could be the tower, bollocks.

We handed over our tickets to her and she read out,

"Max says Eiffel Tower, Martin says Panama. Ha, ha, one of you is stripping it off boys. Carol says.....Eiffel, ooooooh baby, you might be losing those boxers."

It is fair to say I was shitting my pants now.

She turned her paper to read "Eiffel."

"Fuck!" I hissed under my breath through gritted teeth.

"You are not out yet baby," she breathed, in the sexiest voice I had ever heard from her.

"And the answer is....." she turned the card in her hand,

"Shit." She said with a look of pure dejection.

YESSS! I'm saved I thought, until I saw her evil grin. "Gotcha."

"Oh fuck off!"

"Yup, its Eiffel." She grinned showing the card answer around the table.

"Ok, enough is enough." I said standing up to leave.

"Hold on mister, you agreed to the rules. Take em off!"

"Seriously Merl, I cant. This is all I have on!"

"And?" she said with the fucking evilest grin I had ever seen on her.

"Off, Off, Off" came that bloody chant again, with Carol being by far the loudest voice.

I stood as petrified as a statue and Merl came over to what I assumed was to soothe me, I hoped she was going to say its ok baby, you don't have to. But she said "Get them off baby, them's the rules."

With that she grabbed my dick through the boxers shaking it, and said. "No worries, Carol has seen a dick before haven't you hun." Directing her look to her friend.

"Yes, but it is always nice to see a new one." Came her smug reply.

It sent shivers down my spine, how can they all be like this I thought to myself. I felt my wife's hand tugging at the leg of my shorts then her hand dipped into the waistband, I jumped back.