All Comments on 'Out of Focus Pt. 04'

U were right, slow on the launch but a WONDERFUL story.

Gotta confess that I really loathed totally gutlessness of your main character but you used it brilliantly in weaving this story. BRILLIANT!!

WELL DONE!!!!

Fanciful but fun.

Yep, a good read. :)

Great story!

Confusing, convoluted, imaginative, and thoroughly enjoyable. Five stars from me!

Enjoyed the fantasy element. Would have like to see the man grow a set of balls faster but that's okay.

Not sure i'd simply let the stones sit in a sdb, but i guess to each their own.

I held off until the end to write about this, chapter one Lou was the epitome of every RAAC cucky fanatic on Literotica (You know who you are even if you don't want to admit it.) A spineless, weak pathetic excuse for manhood. But with a unique swerve in the story, the MC started to develop testicular fortitude. Interesting story all around...

Excellent story and progression through each part. He'd reach his "happy place" only if he stood up for himself and Alicia from the very start. I normally don't like stories predicated on magical interventions, but this one was a fable where the magic was important for the lesson by the end. Great job, 5*****

What a jumbled up load of crap.

Congratulations on a very good story. I especially enjoyed the multiverse perspective; a rather unique technique in literotica. You developed interesting characters and a fun storyline. I would suggest putting more meat on the bones of other characters such as Francine and Alicia. It would make an already interesting story better

Through hopping across parallel lives, the M evolved from a wimp to someone who actually could assert himself directly what he wants and fight for Alicia. Nice slow escalation. Personally I think not introducing the Bahat stone would ha e been fine. Mother kills husband. Yeah she goes to jail but won't be for long. Francine gets help anyways. MC and Alicia still have a life together.

overall, entertaining

This was entertaining, but 'different', for sure!

It's interesting how, despite the MC's growing self-confidence, each subsequent time-hop has the stone sending him 'further back' in time in order to get him to a 'peaceful place'. He is capable of intelligent planning only when given the advantage of 'hindsight'; he can't seem to be able to deal with any 'new' problem developments without being 'stoned' backward.

And it's fortunate the story didn't continue on for a few more chapters, because eventually the MC might have re-awakened from a time jump to find himself sucking at his mother's tit, with the magical stone tucked in his diaper.

(Presumably the motherly encounter would have him reverted all the way back to infant form, although not necessarily so, since an incestual element is already present.)

Overall, though having a somewhat unsatisfying MC, the story was unique enough to be enjoyable.

Lots of fun in that story. Thanks.

This really should be rated higher. Good stuff.

Overall quite a good story!! Really did not expect a fairytale when reading a LW story but found it a fun read!! Came very near to dumping the whole story with the way that the MC was so stupid and completely lacking in cojones until the magic started happening! Didn’t even have the smarts or the guts to arm himself once he learned how tough the people he was messing with were…. JEEZ!!!!

3 stars - there were just way too many inconsistencies throughout this story that it was hard to follow and required backtracking to try to find out the reasons.

Other than that, it was a good fairy tale and I have always liked time travel.

Have a nice day, and please keep writing.