Peaches and Cream Pt. 07

"Daddy!"

"Catherine, a man doesn't mow a woman's yard because she's a great conversationalist. He does it because he wants her favor. And a woman doesn't make scones on a Saturday morning unless she is thanking him for a great Friday night. Is he hiding in the bedroom, too afraid to come out?"

"Daddy, NO! He went for a run then to his place to shower and change clothes. He is coming back around lunchtime. Dad, I know you are not a Matthew Walker fan but hiding in the bedroom. Why would you say that? He is a forty-year-old man."

"Why would I be a Matthew fan? Honey, he hid from me in college so why wouldn't he hide from me now. The first time I met the guy was in an ER in Winston Salem. It was also when I learned that my daughter lied to her parents and coerced her roommate into lying for her. As far as we knew, Matt was a guy you tutored in math for pocket money. We had no idea you were dating and living together on the weekends. What guy doesn't want to meet his girlfriend's parents or encourages her to deceive them? And what exactly did you have in common? He was an English major, an athlete and a white boy from Wake Forest. And lastly, he breaks my baby girl's heart by letting another girl perform fellatio on him."

"Dad, that's not all Matt's fault. I made the decision not to introduce him to you because I was afraid of your reaction. You raised me to be a good Catholic girl who focused on her studies and would chastely date a good Catholic boy. Math was not Catholic nor was our relationship chaste. I think we can all agree the less you and Patricia know about my sex life the happier we all are. And I am not a fool, you did not want your baby girl to marry a white guy. Lucky for me you have gotten over that." Catherine kissed her dad's cheek.

Phillip patted her leg. "You've worn me down baby girl. The older I get, the more I realize I want my children to be happy and loved. If Matt makes you happy, we can work through the rest. But let's not forget the purpose of my visit. Catherine, please call your mother. I don't ask a lot from you but do this for me. I can't have my favorite two ladies fighting. Fighting with you means your mother is exceedingly lovely to Alicia and neither handles that well." Catherine burst out laughing.

****************

Matthew felt like he stepped into an episode of the Twilight Zone when he pulled in front of Catherine's house. There was a black Cadillac with North Carolina plates parked in the drive. He could hear the sounds of Al Green and laughter coming from the back and smelled something delicious coming from the grill.

Matt headed to the back to find several neighbors sitting in the backyard drinking beer and talking. Matthew greeted them and stopped. He knew Phillip Miller the moment he saw him standing in front of the grill cooking something. He turned as Cat's neighbors greeted him. "Matthew." He laid down his spatula and extended his hand. "Just grilling some brats and hamburgers for my baby girl. She's in the house fixing some sides."

"It's great to see your Mr. Miller." Matthew shook his hand and headed into the house. "Peach?" He found her in the kitchen with an apron on stirring something. Her neighbor, Alexis, was sipping Rose chatting animatedly. "Hi, Alexis. Do you mind if I talk to Cat in private for a moment?" Alexis nodded and slipped out the back door.

"Your father and half the street is in our backyard. Did you know he was coming?" Matt lowered his voice, "He is not planning to kill me and dispose of my body?" He sounded like he was joking, but Cat knew he was serious.

Catherine dropped her spoon and walked over to him. She planted a soft kiss on his lips. "Calm down. I would not ambush you with my father. He showed up to broker a peace accord between my mother and me. Mostly the peace accord is me falling on my sword and begging for forgiveness. We are still in negotiation."

"Matt, my dad would never tell me that. He wouldn't want me to go to jail as an accomplice. Besides, he served 31 years in the army including 4 tours in Vietnam. If he wanted you dead, it would have happened already." She hugged him and kissed him again.

"When my dad visits, he brings me stuff, usually food. This time he brought ribs, pork butt, and chickens that he smoked last night. He is experimenting with a new rub and wants me to try it." She didn't mention the cases of soda, stone ground grits and her favorite German cookies he "found" at the commissary. "Dad offered the share with Mr. and Mrs. Phillips next door. I could have them over and not invite the Tom and Jenny across the street. Their son and daughter in law are here, so they came too. I called Alexis, and she brought her friend Meredith. And the smell of the grill made the Wilson's appear. All I said was bring a dish and beverage to share. And they did.

"Matt, this is my dad. He loves good food and people to share it with. Besides, a backyard full of people is safer for you than the three of us alone in this house." Matt wrapped her arms around Matt's neck and gave him a slow kiss with tongue. "Be a dear and run to the store for me. Alexis said she would, but she's 2/3 in on a bottle of Rose. And try not to look so sexy. Mrs. Phillips gets touchy when she's had a few drinks."

****************

Matt sat next to Phillip at the fire pit smoking a cigar and sipping bourbon. After saying goodbye to the last of her guests, Catherine excused herself to clean up. This was a setup. "You've done a wonderful job with this yard. Cat told me you keep the yard mowed and bushes trimmed." Phillip took a puff of his cigar. "She looks happy."

"I would never do anything to hurt Catherine, sir."

"You mean again?" Matt opened then closed his mouth. "Son, we got off to a bad start. It was easier to blame you than my daughter. Cat avoids conflict with her mother and disappointing me. She knew her mother, and I would never approve of you for a variety of reasons. She lied to us and made you complicit in her lies. And then you had to make it worse for yourself. I am willing to chalk it up to being young and dumb. What I want to know is how do you feel about my daughter today?"

"I apologized to Cat for hurting her. I was young and dumb and regretted it the moment it happened. She wouldn't listen to me or try to work through it. She cut me out of her life. It hurt, but I learned to live without her. But seeing her again has given me hope we can reconnect. Try to start over. I adore Cat and just want to make her happy. However, I am not sure that is what she wants. She has her walls up."

"You sound like a contestant on the Bachelor." Phillip chuckled. "You have a bad case of what I call "Pat Flu." You apologize but she never quite accepts, does she? You bend over backward trying to please her and keep coming up short. You secretly wonder if it's worth it, but she slides over to you and gives you a sly smile or a taste and then you're back under her spell."

"Son, there is no cure. All you can do is hope it doesn't consume you. Let me give you some advice: talk to her. I know you want to keep the peace, so you let her have her way, but a relationship won't survive that way. Love may be easy, but a real relationship is hard work. I learned that lesson. Giving in won't make her love you it will just breed resentment and anger in you. No successful relationship is all or nothing. It takes communication, compromise, and forgiveness. Now the fact your 5 months in and went home to shower and change states that Catherine is in control."

Matt was glad Phillip couldn't see his face. "She tells me she is not ready. I have to respect her boundaries."

"Cat is afraid you will hurt her again. Until she is ready to let you in, you'll live in limbo. Only you can decide how long you are willing to live in limbo."

"Did you offer this advice to John?"

"No. I will deny saying this, but I couldn't stand the pompous and arrogant asshole. John was an orthopedic surgeon, not God. His family is vanilla, and I am not talking about skin tone. We had Thanksgiving dinner at their house, and it was bleak. Plus I hated that he never referred to Cat as Dr. She worked hard for her doctorate. She is Dr. Miller, not Ms. Miller. Patricia was willing to bite her tongue because she knows how much Cat wants children. Neither of us was shocked that went south."

"Then why was Patricia so angry?"

"Early on Pat tried to tell Cat he was wrong for her. Instead of listening to her mother, she became defensive. Pat decided to bite her tongue and be supportive of the relationship. She didn't want to be cut out of her future grandchildren's lives. She stewed in her resentment as she watched Cat settle for less than she deserved. And that resentment bubbled to the top. Pat was enraged over all the times Cat didn't listen to her and Cat was indignant with her mother trying to control her.

Plus Patricia hates you for all the reasons you can guess and a few you can't. This blow up was inevitable, but you were the match that ignited the fuse. I just hope they can repair the damage. The longer they don't talk..." Phillip's voice trailed off.

***************

Labor Day 2016

Catherine sat on the couch mindlessly flipping through channels. It was Labor Day, and she was alone in a quiet house. The dogs were asleep in their beds exhausted from their morning walk. Her father left Sunday morning to head home and work on his honey-do list. Catherine found $200 hidden under her guest pillow and her mother's cell phone number.

Matt was conspicuously absent. After smoking cigars with her father, he'd given Catherine a chaste kiss on her cheek and returned to his apartment. To be honest, she did not expect him to stay over with her father there but a kiss on the cheek. She texted him Sunday about getting together, but he was playing golf. He called later to say he needed to review papers and would call her Monday. It was almost noon and so far no call from Matt.

This was not like Matt. Matt either called or texted Cat several times a day. He asked about her work, her mood and her plans. He was very clear about wanting more of Cat's time not less. Cat, however, put restrictions on their time together. She wanted healthy boundaries something they entirely skipped in college. The cat would expect him to understand if she chose work over him. They why did him not coming when she calls feel like rejection.

She turned off the television and went into the kitchen for a cookie. Bored, she baked walnut chocolate chip and oatmeal cranberry cookies yesterday. How was it possible she did not know he played golf or whom he played with? What other things did she not know about him?

Cat poured herself a glass of milk. She's spent her morning walk reviewing the past few months. Everything she knew about Matt's life over the past 18 years she could fit on a post-it note. She knew he was taught English but was now an attorney, his mother died from breast cancer, and after his divorce, he moved to Virginia. Why did he choose Virginia? Did he miss teaching? What was his favorite movie, book or television show? Did he want children or to get married again? If they stopped having sex, would they still be interested in one another?

This question was not a new one. It nagged at Catherine throughout college. In college, Matthew Walker was hot and definitely not in Catherine Miller's league. She knew she was pretty, but Matt turned heads when he walked into a room. She saw the jealousy in other girls eyes when they walked by holding hands. Heard their whispers about her size, her race, and her geekiness. Some woman would have gained power from their murmurs, but Cat grew increasingly insecure.

The one area she felt utterly secure in was her sexual relationship with Matt. Their first night was magical devoid of any awkwardness or apprehension. A wildfire passion grew between them. Catherine felt sexy and beautiful when he was kissing and holding her body. She expressed this confidence in her willingness to push her personal sexual boundaries. The more they were together, the more they wanted to be together. Everything from his reading of poetry to her thoughts on mathematical theory worked as foreplay.

Then he betrayed her. Every fear and insecurity came to the surface that night with Alicia. Against her friends' wishes, Cat sought the girl out. She was an attractive white sorority girl with blonde hair pulled back in a bow. She played intermural soccer and studied French. Cat felt physically ill. How could he be turned on by both of them? Did he really love her or was she an easy lay.

Catherine wiped the tears from her cheeks. Damn it. She convinced herself she worked through these feelings. Feelings more easily contained when dealing with memory. Now Matt was a warm body next to her some nights not a ghost from her past.

Catherine heard the alert on her phone. She went to the living room hoping to find a text from Matt. Instead, she found a note from her Dad: I left you a surprise under the pillow in the guest room. But since you are your mother's daughter, you found it when you changed the sheets. Think about what I said. Love you baby girl. See you at Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving? He hadn't said anything about Thanksgiving. Catherine sighed. She knew what she needed to do. She needed to have an honest conversation with Matt and break the icy stalemate with her mother.

**************

Patricia Miller was half asleep when she heard her phone rang. She looked at the screen to see the picture of a cat flash. Patricia resigned herself that Catherine was Cat, not Cathy. Her grandsons followed Phillip's lead and called her Kitty. It was her grandson who suggested she make her contact photo a picture of a cat.

Patricia had not heard from her daughter in months. They fought in the past but nothing like this. Patricia was unaware of Catherine's deep anger towards her. Was she really that bad of a mother her youngest hated her? Panic crept in. Something was wrong, why else would she call.

"Catherine? Is everything ok?" Catherine felt like crying when she heard the worry and tension in her mother's voice. Of course, she would assume the worst when she saw her daughter called. Cat knew she should have texted.

"Everything is fine. Did you go to your retreat this weekend?"

"Yes. It's nice to get away with the ladies without husbands, children or grandchildren. We started our days with scripture and daily devotion, followed by quiet reflection and fellowship in the evenings."

"How much did you win at the casino?"

"Almost $200. The slots appreciate it when you start with a grateful heart. Catherine..." Patricia wasn't exactly sure what to say next.

Patricia could hear the dogs in the background barking. "Mom, I don't hate you. I don't expect you to be my best friend, but I do expect you to respect me as an adult. I have to go, there is someone at my door." Catherine ended the call before Patricia could respond. Cat did not hate her! Patricia let out an unsteady breath as she wiped the tears off her cheeks. The tightness in her chest created by the fear she'd lost her daughter eased.

"On the bus headed home. What did you get into this weekend?" Patricia texted her husband.

His response was immediate. "Nothing just tinkered around the house."

"Phillip Miller, I love you. And I plan to show you how much when I get home."

****************

Matt sat in his car outside Catherine's house. She was not expecting him. He spent Sunday thinking about their relationship. Phillip was right. They couldn't keep existing in this sex-filled limbo. Matt did not want to lose her, but he wanted more from her than her body. He wanted her heart, her mind, and her soul. He knew what it was like when Cat gave all of those, and he wanted that again.

He did not know what he wanted to say to her. He never thought, he would suggest they split up. But splitting up implied they were a couple, and Matt realized they were not. Couples shared their lives, talked about the future, laughed and cried together.

Matt let out a deep breath. When Matt saw Cat in the coffee shop, his breathing stopped. He frequently imagined what he would say to her if he saw her again and wondered about her smile. Did she accomplish all she wanted and had love found her? When he ran into her on the trail, that smile made his heart stop. And after making love to her, he vowed he would do whatever it took to keep her. Even if that meant living on her terms.

The problem was he wanted more. Cat's father was right she was afraid. Afraid of being vulnerable and open, afraid he would break her heart again. He was scared too. Afraid the past would never allow them to have a future.

Matt got out of the car. He slowly walked to the front door with his heart slamming against his chest. Peeking through the blind, he could see her pacing while she spoke on the phone. Clearly, this was not a good time for a conversation. He started to turn around when the dogs spotted him and began barking. Cat looked up and saw him through the window. He gave a half-hearted wave. She nodded and finished up her phone call.

Matt took a deep breath. He needed to steady his resolve because one look at Cat and he would melt. She opened up the door and looked at him. Suddenly, Catherine broke out crying. "You've come to break up with me, haven't you?"