All Comments on 'Player Three'

Now that is a real loving wives story. Five stars.

Awesome story. A well woven tale. As always with your stories, it flows wonderfully, and is a fun read. Well done. The characters are beautifully crafted and appear real and relatable.

Randi is incapable of writing badly. When she's at her best, she is one of the very best. This is her at her best. RPL

That was a great story. I thought for a while after dumping the crazy bitch he was going to hook up with Bach. It surprised me when you had her playing for the other team, but Audra was even better. Five pointy things.

Very enjoyable, with likeable characters, except for Patricia. My only quibble is that she seemed very cold and calculating. Hard to believe she had any genuine feelings for Daniel.

5*

I really would like to know more about his ex-wife. Is she happy now with all her lovers? Is she a gang-bang-queen? Or did she settle down with one man again.

Great story!

5

maybe even the best

Entertaining and fun little romp. Hope you had as much fun writing it as I did reading it.

Once in a while you find a flower growing in the sewer. LW has been a sewer lately. It's a sewer today, except for this rose. Great story Randi.

Focalization is real thing,

But I don't think it can affect someone to the point that they stupidise themselves into a divorce

Went sideways for me Randi. Everything was fine until you paired a 20 year old with a 30 year old. It's rather ridiculous, in my opinion.

What would one expect when you see a story by one of Lit.com's premier writers, edited by no fewer than half a dozen big-name authors? Perfect, of course.

Wow, Just beautiful, Randi! Loved it!

I might be biased, but I really enjoyed the read. Great story.

This is a well written, old man fantasy.

A fantasy, but hey, you says old guys like me can't fantasize.

Was a good story until the end. Having the dad end up with the daughters friend, who is more than half his age, didn't sit well with me. Also, we didn't really get any closure on the divorce. That part just seemed very rushed and there was no real confrontation or ending to the wife's story.

Just how Patricia spiced up their marriage? Non.

Maybe all she wanted is truly to spice up her vagina with different phalluses.

Probably her ass too.

/

I usually like to know the aftermath of the other spouse's life after the divorce.

But surprisingly, I don't give a darn thing about that selfish, narcissistic Patricia.

So what happened to Pat?

A rare treat from Ms. Crosby, and a fun read.

/

I like the term ‘focalization’. Haven’t come across it before in this context - is that psychobabble for obsessed? I looked it up, and it seems to have a variety of meanings depending on the usage.

/

Thanks much for the story. A nice start to the morning..

He'll die happy. Maybe pretty soon, too. D

Great read. “I’d never cared for swings” is one of the best lines I’ve seen in LW. I wish I’d thought of it. LOL

Too much manufactured melodrama for me, but I’m sure other people will like it. Having his super-hot new lover walk in literally the day he left his unrealistically wacko wife was funny.

I really enjoyed this story, well done!

You're very good at writing endearing young women and making their dialogue sound authentic. The twins were both very likeable and I loved how they were so loyal to their father. Audra was a sweetheart and you left me hoping that it worked out for her and Daniel.

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My only criticism of the story as a whole is that the main plot kind of fizzled out and left too many loose ends. It seemed like this needed a final confrontation with Patricia, because the last time we saw her was in the meeting with Bach mediating. The divorce happened in the background after that, then Pat was never really mentioned again.

I was left wondering what happened to the ex-wife. Did she ever regret what she'd done? It seemed like they had a good relationship until she destroyed it by cheating, so she must have really missed her husband. Was she miserable post-divorce, or was she happy becoming a sleazy swinger like her two skanky friends?

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I honestly think this could've been one of the best stories you've written, if you fleshed it out a bit more. Some more drama with the delusional ex-wife, maybe with some frantic attempts on her behalf to "save the marriage" would have been in-character. Then round it off with an epilogue that details what happened to all the major players.

It's reasonable to expect that Audra would eventually want to have a family of her own. A scene with Patricia finding out that Daniel had remarried and knocked up a beautiful young woman that was the same age as her daughters would have been amusing.

Well written. Good read. Tired storyline though. Been there, done that.

Another great story from an excellent author. I knew a couple that had this sort of happen to, she wanted to introduce other people in their relationship and he didn't. There is no real common ground in that scenario and they didn't last

Great job, Randi and team! I really liked the first 2/3rds with well developed characters and a very good plot (and a belated explanation from Pat) with Daniel standing up and not allowing himself to be turned into a wimp or super-secret avenger like the guys in so many LW stories (great disclaimer up front, too!). There were bits of good humor, with the spicy red pepper question having me rolling! Finally, it was good to see the girls support Daniel and understand the situation with Pat; kids that age see things and understand (though I was surprised they could see into the club. How many establishments of that type would have windows?). However, the hot tub scene introduced new characters and a new dynamic that seemed to move things forward too fast. The ultimate destination was a middle-aged guy's ultimate fantasy that was still very well written but which seemed to fall a bit short of the high expectations of the great set-up. Even with that, it was still a great read, so I'd rate it 4.7* (rounded to 5). Thanks for writing and for sharing it with us.

Blackrandl I always enjoy your stories. My only wish is you write more of them. There is so much ridiculous trash on this genre I enjoy when someone of your caliber contributes.

A great way to start the day . . a Randi tale! Thank you, a wonderful story - 5 stars.

somewhere east of Omaha

Apparently he’s a magnet for women with issues.

After reading this and similar stories, my plan would be tell her I need some time to think about it. Then have her served with divorce papers asap and a restraining order to stay away from the house and me.

Once she asks the question the marriage is over. Either that or enjoy the ride while frantically hiding assets

Good story. I gave it a five. You must have a lot of jealous haters out there or this would have a much higher score.

I wondered what happened with Patricia, but then I realized that none of them really care, and I don't either. She picked option one, let her live with it. When you have a toxic person in your life, you just cut them out if you have any sense, and move on.

You do write well, and with this story trying to have a little fun. And it is an entertaining parody about an “ordinary” couple wrestling with “ordinary” marital drama in the “ordinary” struggle in life. A stable, loving, patronizing husband and great father married to a beautiful but ditzy, shallow woman who is full steam ahead wedded to a hair brained idea that undermines the marriage. The remarkably talented children (typically daughters near independence) worship their father and display far more maturity than their mother. Once the wife brings down the marriage he finds a beautiful, usually much younger woman who falls almost instantaneously and madly in love with him and they sail off into the sunset after consummating their love with out of the world sex, something never enjoyed with the ditzy wife. A 5 star parody, otherwise … .

Good story thanks. A very lucky husband.

Loved it. Thank you!!

I always know it is gonna be a great day when I log in and see a new story from Randi. This one did not disappoint. Great that he stuck to his principals.

A lovely little story. I look forward to more from you BR :)

I also very much look forward to Bh76s new story borrowing the line "I'd never cared for swings""

What a wonderful story. Patricia gets her ego boost and insecurities eased and Daniel gets what he wants. Works out for everyone.

Outstanding. An unbelievable scenario made believable. A lucky unlucky guy!

Wow. I'd just recently completed a read-through of all the previously-posted BlackRandI1958 stories, and made some remark in my comments that there had been a long time since her most recent posting (the exquisite "Turn The Page" from 12/07/20), probably because she was so busy editing others' stories, devising story-theme events, and possibly helping run this site. And sure enough, only eight days a week later (as HDK might put it), comes this. Another 5. While not a tear-jerker like "TTP" was, I did find the tear ducts moistening a bit at the bottom of page one, but for the most part this was the fun time promised in the intro. I found myself disappointed when it turned out Bach had a female lover, and thus was only interested in Daniel as a friend. Probably like Daniel himself, I really didn't see the thing with Audra coming. That is a tribute to Randi's deft touch, both in how she writes, and how she moves the plot along. And I love all the hip slang ("don't want to step on your vibe," "this is gonna be fire," "Imma," "that ratchet," "get after it," "swag hotel," the ever-present "yeet" and others). I sort of wanted the story to continue. Not that it's incomplete where it ended, since we all know where things are going. Just that it was so much fun, and I didn't want to leave the party.

I gave 4 stars because for the first 90% of the story it was really good. However, the baby snatching was not realistic or good in any way. She is his daughters friend and this doesn't sit well. Also, what happened to his ex wife? She was a big part of most of the story then she just disappeared. What happened to her?

great read as usual. In my mind Patricia is passed around like a slut and enjoys it until she finds out that no one really respects her and she does not have true love. So all that sex gets boring and she is lonely for real affection.

But at least... he's having a hell of a time today. I guess you live today and hope for a tomorrow. Good story. You're definitely a gifted writer, and your stories even though fictitious, they reflect real live issues. Thanks for the story.

The usual result for the spouse who thinks bringing an outsider into their sex lives will “Spice it Up.” Almost always it just blows it up, even when the spouses agree to try it. BUT it is Guaranteed to blow up when one of the spouses is opposed to the idea. The selfishness of some folks is mind boggling.

Well written, as always. Enjoyed the read.

Thanks to my team. Harddaysknight is my mentor and gives me critical review. Hale1, SBrooks103x, Stev2244, Cagivagurl and GeorgeAnderson are my readers and editors. What a great bunch.

Page one: They were both very good drivers, aside from that need to accelerate like a bat our of hell away from the lights, and I trusted them. Did you mean a bat out of hell? Yeet!

While I'm not always happy with the age difference thing, this is a great story and well worth the 5 stars. Thank you!

I bet it does not.

I liked this tale quite a bit, 5 stars. I agree with my friend Brayce Heart, I never liked swings, cucks, guys that give their wives to others etc. I will read all of your offerings now, I have loved your editing on many stories.

One commenter said the characters were real and relatable. For the most part, that seems true with the glaring exception of Pat. None of her actions were common with sanity. I thought Bach was going to be a switch hitter and Daniel would join her and her girlfriend. Audra was a pleasant surprise.

Great one! Fun read.

I like they way you put to bed that crap about husbands that don’t want an open marriage or a cheating wife must be “possessive” when they’re only expecting marriage to be exactly what they both signed up for. “You don’t own my body” is a code for “I want to be a slut and you can’t stop me” and all you need to hear before calling the lawyer.

Cute; 5*

5***** I can't deny a good story when I read it. I hope the relationship works out, but 2+ decades is a big difference. Still, we make of it what we will. He has great daughters, a great lover, and great friends. All he was missing was a wife with an ounce of common sense who wasn't selfish.

Well told, not missing a beat. The plot like so many others with a new twist here and there. Having him ending up with Audra is every man's dream regardless of age. I felt although sexy it distracted a bit of the story line.

You nailed it...again! Outstanding as always. You're one of the best!

Another masterpiece

Incredible story that had me engulfed in your universe. Couple things made me cringe, namely ending up with a woman his daughters age. Better success rate than swingers, but not by much in the long run. I also would have liked to know how Annie ended up in her life. Hell, that I'm even commenting like this indicated how well you did. Great job, again! 5+*

You're my hero! 5* Hugs and kisses, Amy

I only read this once before commenting so I could be wrong , but here goes .

It started off well enough but the plot just petered out . I think it actually ended as more of a non story !

Wife wanted to swing but could only do so as part of a couple , yet still goes swinging ?

When Bach saw Dan with two young women she got the wrong idea and disapproved , not realising they were his daughters . And yet she seems happy enough with Dan and her own daughter having a relationship , despite the same age gap ?

And finally that old chestnut of some older women needing to feel ' validated ' . She wanted different dicks pure and simple . Every woman knows she can get just about any man interested given a modicum of favourable circumstances , after all, we see that men are practically programmed to shag anything .The problem for all women is getting the right man interested . And she already had him . He wanted her , wanted to have children with her build a home , a future and become grandparents , all with her . If that's not being validated as a woman I think maybe I need to try swinging .

Thanks for the read .

CT

Well written but you rushed it. You failed the fully explore the character of the ex wife.

Great and enjoyable story! Five shiny and bright stars from me on this one. Yep, "swings" can be dangerous...still got a scar on my tongue from a "swing" encounter that went sideways when I was a young whipper snapper.

I laughed out loud at "Slutzilla." Great story.

Great story. I would love to see where this goes in the next 5 years. He and Audra probably get married and have another kid or 2. Cat and Liv may get married themselves. Pat is going to get a free train ride on the depression express for self-destructing her marriage. She gave up a family and loving husband for all the loveless sex she wants. She'll probably look 10+ years older when reality bitch slaps her.

Thanks Blackrandl1958. As always, your story is a 5.

I was going to just read part of this before doing some work then read the rest tonight, but once I started it, I couldn't put it down. Work can wait, I told myself. 5 stars.

And once again, this is how you do it. A good story but the writers skills are what makes it perfect. I enjoyed it very much, thank you.

"this could be so good for us" - It COULD be good for SOME people, obviously not for Daniel.

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"I thought if we went there, I would see if people hit on me," - They already hit on her when they went to the dance clubs, even the much younger guys. That should have been enough validation for her.

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@Anonymous, dance lessons and the swing club are two quite different things!

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@Powersworder, the divorce happened in the background because at that point that's all it was, background. There were no assets to hide, no bitches to be burned, it was all over except for signing the papers. I think she probably regretted it, but there was nothing she could do, so what was the point in belaboring it?

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@swedishreader1, the "instant replacement" theory would have fit if it was Bach; having it be Audra shook things up.

Well written. Thanks. However, personally it seemed to me the MC's relationship with the daughters was borderline skeevy, and frankly, I just skimmed beginning with the Audra stuff at the end as it was full on skeevy. Sorry. Just not my cup of tea. Nevertheless, I can appreciate the quality that went into the story's crafting.

A good story until you put Audra and him together. I'm not a big fan of May-December romances. It ruined an otherwise good story. And you left out the drama of the divorce and fallout. Too bad. Making the Mother gay wasn't the greatest idea either. Just a distraction.

So . . . . extremely well written, as would be expected, and the first half of the story drew me in. Still, only 3* for a few reasons. First, the story was filled with, and driven by, too many LW cliches: the husband destined for sainthood, the Martian Slut/IQ-lowering Ray obstinate wife, the immediate post-divorce hookup with the younger, hotter woman (well, girl in this case). Second, I don't know what 19-year-olds you know, but these two were vastly more mature and wiser than any I've ever met, and they came across as totally unrealistic. Third, and most importantly, the characters didn't seem to have any emotions, and if they don't care deeply then as a reader I don't either. You had George Anderson as a editor - his stories may have some unrealistic plot drivers, but man, does he get the characters' (and the reader's) juices running!

And again, only 3* because I'm holding you to the standard you've set with masterpieces such as "Turn The Page".

That was a real romantic story with all the ups and downs you can imagine. Very well done, well told and presented in a formidable way. I liked that very much. Thanks!

Very nice,overall. Two comments (my two cents?):

1. A marriage counselor once told us (1978-wife # 2) it is the man was wants to open up the marriage,but it's the woman who refuses to close it back up!

2. For all those who complain about lack of information about the ex-wife: after 38 years with wife #4, I have no idea about the first three. How can you live in the past. Once I walked out of court,it didn't matter what my ex did. Although I did have a celebratory breakfast with ex-wife #2. Last I saw or heard about her.

Competent writing (as expected) from Blackrandl…however the story was quite formulaic. Enjoyable read, but nothing new here. Four stars ⭐️ for this one.

l had to wait until the end for the obligatory 'yeet' how cruel!

That went off the rails the instant that Bach announced she had a female lover, and that Audra became the potential….and then real….girlfriend for Dad.

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Up to that point, I was enjoying the personalities and dynamic of his twins, and how smartly they separated from Patricia the crazy slut. The all too convenient meeting up with Bach and Audra was rather trite, until you did NOT get him together with Bach.

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But getting together with Audra was, frankly, creepy. And THAT scraped a star of of my score (and it didn’t help that Patricia didn’t seem to suffer much…too delusional, I guess, to care about blowing up the family)

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So…solid 3 *** …. But coulda been more.

Highest Quality story with none of the male humiliation so prevalent in today's posts. Takes a pro!

May-December, anti-swing, den of iniquity, ditzy blonde, twins, perfect daughters, two redheads, plenty of cash, sexy car, daddy issues, instant gf at separation, hateful/unbalanced wife, lesbian pair, envious male eyes, slimy slut leading wife astray, divorce…almost all of the LW major food groups. With pizza, take-out Chinese, green eyes, and three showers per paragraph, it would be complete. Yup, just ordinary people struggling with life. And, perhaps, a group of very talented writers having a little fun?

LWlurker

LWlurker

Really enjoyed it. Getting together with Audra was a bit of a stretch. Now for the most nit picking criticism ever….the girls held serve and broke the weaker opponent twice means the first set could not have been 6-4, it had to be 6-3 or 6-2 if they were up 2 breaks.

Excellent … very enjoyable read. 5/5

A Randi story always brightens my day. Excellent story. 5 stars.

Hooked

You're a good storyteller!

Nice story, well laid out. Seems like everybody came out ahead.

Great story. I would have liked to hear from Pat on what she learned from the swinger club sex. Was it amazing sex? Was it worth losing her family? Is she still trying to see if men find her attractive? Maybe a second chapter from her perspective.

Seems like it should've belonged in the romance section. Story seemed rushed when it came to their divorce with lil dialogue from the ex. Also, the story was missing emotions but that was probably from the ex not having much dialogue in the story.

I see you don’t like bad comments about this author. Everyone is entitled to a opinion. So to be fair display bad comments I have entered.

A great read. I wish you would write more often, but you spend so much time helping others that gyour infrequent publishing is understandable.

Excellent story. Thanks for using Audra to toss a monkey wrench into the usual cliched ending.

Pat was a tad too much of the usual over the top bitch.....so that rather dragged it down, if she were a bit less so it would have worked better.

And this "She nodded. "Fair enough. I'm not giving up, Daniel. I want you back, but things would have to change." Like most writers the wife cant seem to claim she wants her marriage to survive and her husband back without exclaiming she'll keep doing what caused the husband to leave. I wish more of you would realize that comes across as so much emotional manipulation of the reader, hoping to keep them growling at the "bitch". Its one thing if they think it, but to actually say it to the husband makes my statement 100% correct.

Look at it this way, wife shoves husband down the basement stairs, says I love you, I dont want a divorce, I want to stay married. Oh and by the way I'll keep shoving you down the stairs whenever I want. Learn from it, it'll make your stories much better.

While I'm sure there are examples, I can't think of any great works of literature where the author thinks the reader should know what food and drinks where consumed, by whom, when, and where. It is distracting and looks like filler. He walks into the room and immediately tells us that Adura is drinking orange juice. WTF? I of course expected that OJ was going to somehow be part of the plot, or a character trait, or have some significance to the story? But no, we apparently should find it worth noting, but then forgetting. Which is a Very Consistent pattern among many of the regular mediocre LW authors. Kind of goes along with a page or two of background childhood history and subplots that have NO influence on the plot and are never resolved. It looks like the author must be getting paid by the word.

Here we have the usual weak husband and dominant wife, where the wife wants some strange dick and the husband wants to escape. That's fine. Since the plot concept is pretty typical and blaze', it takes the delivery and execution to make the story compelling and dramatic. Instead we got dinner menus, floor plans, and a Whatzatrac? Is that like a batmobile, or in this case a cuckmobile? Cause that's what the doofus ends up being before his Wife essentially forces him out of the marriage. She Did Not want a divorce, but even more emphatically she DID NOT want to give up strange cock. But all she wanted was their attention, honest. She must have had her fingers crossed when she said that. I suspect its the only two appendages this whore ever crossed.

The story was adequate and average, which for this author is a fail. We know you can do better, and really enjoy it when you do. I appreciate the effort and look forward to better work in the future.

Another Great 5* story. Nice to see something from you once gracing the pages here

I was sold on reading this story as soon as I read the name of the author. It was a treat to read and ended as I have come to expect from 'blackrandl1958' I liked the switch to Audra from her mother, it's the kind of thing that happens sometimes, in fantasies and real life. Great Job, Thank You 5*****

Smoothly written but flat. We see Daniel's tears, but do we feel the sadness that gives rise to them?

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But this is really a love story between a father and his daughters, with Pat being an afterthought in the narrative's emotional and dramatic structures. There is potential for conflict in that father/daughter love that disappointingly never makes its way into the story. Aurora becomes a surrogate third daughter. The Daniel/Aurora love affair thus has strong incestuous vibes.

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Would daughters really welcome their 50 year old dad coupling with their close friend, a woman in her early 20s? Lots of Oedipal subtext here left unexplored.

You stopped the story just a little to short: you could have added Pat EXPLODING when she found out, especially that it wasn’t Bach, but her DAUGHTER! LOL

Just another Randi norm - well written, no loose ends, and the punctuation done correctly. HAHAHA

5*

PostScriptor

So he ends up with a girl half his age? Really? Didn't like this story at all. This must have been a wealthy guy, buys a three story house before he's even divorced. And of course he meets his future wife the same day he moves out of the house. Yeah, right. 3*

A lovely little story, superbly written as always. I think everything else has already been said, thank you. 5*

Peerless writing. There is really very little to compare it to. Please write more often. It's been too long. Ken in Ohio.

I had to go back for a second read. This authours works always invite me in, and I can never stop reading, once I start I have to finish it. My second read, is slower and gives me a chance to savour and enjoy what is a well told story. The characters grow on you, and it is impossible not to be sucked in. Beautifully written and fun to read. Loved it.

@Anonymous: "Wow, I'd just..."

Well, Imma post another story on December 6, along with a bunch great writers. If you would like to see stories from the likes of DTIverson, Laptopwriter, Angiquesophie, Amyyum, Qhml1, Androgynousother, Markelly, Cagivagurl, Harddaysknight, Just Plain Bob, Papatoad, MattblackUK, Stev2244, Hooked1957, Postscriptor, KK, and many others, save that date. The event is called "The Art of Falling." Thanks for the comment, for reading, and thanks to all the other kind readers and commentators. Randi

It didn't flow well. It's like you wrote 2 different stories. You made a big deal about the wife saying she isn't giving up and then we really didn't hear about her again until you mentioned in passing at the end that the daughters started having a relationship with her. So what really happened to the wife during and after the divorce??? A big deal was made about going to this club basically from pressure being put on the wife from some person who we are told very little about. Then she just goes to meet a guy and they go together and she destroys what is left of the marriage and it is treated like they just went to dinner by the main husband character???

It seems like a lot of holes in the story and not what I have come to expect from you.

And all because Patricia wanted to taste some forbidden fruit. But she found that whilst she was forcing down dome rancid durian fruit, Daniel was nibbling on juicy, ripe strawberries. Yeet! indeed.

5*, of course.

After all the fulsome praise this story has received, I hesitate to raise a critical voice. Yes, the author handles language well (although there are several surprising grammatical errors), the dialogue flows as it should, The story line, however, while superficially plausible, has one fatal flaw that negates all the good points. The mother is portrayed not just as a selfish idiot, but as a narcisstic psychopath, who is even willing to alienate her children for an absurd exercise in self-indulgence. Yet, after twenty years of marriage, we are asked to believe that the husband is not aware of his wife's mental state! Unless the author has intended to portray him as a complete mental cripple, this rings competely false.

A minor point: No swing club would have windows uncovered so that an outside voyeur could observe the behavior of its clients. What a venue for law suits and blackmail that would constitute!

Finally a nitpick: The father takes nineteen year olds out for cream, without their objecting that he is treating them as five year olds?