Poorly Timed Backflip

Hey! I haven't written anything in years but got looking at some of the comments on my earlier stories and was inspired to do something new. I might also add updates to prior stories if there's interest. As ever any feedback and comments are super welcome. I hope you enjoy!

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It was a strange thing to be in an environment that was so familiar and yet to feel so foreign within it. Even though she came home at least twice a year it never truly felt comfortable anymore. Some of the bars and restaurants were the same but a once thriving town centre had deteriorated steadily over the last eight years until the only lively looking businesses were betting and charity shops. Pushing open the door to the local pub she gave a smile that was just shy of a grimace to the bartender as she approached the bar.

"Hey... how are you? Can I please have a gin and tonic?" She asked as she unbuttoned her coat and hung it up before taking a seat, smoothing out the thin material of her Summer dress before taking a seat, crossing one leg over the other. Reaching into her bag she pulled out her MacBook and opened it up. She wanted to be around people not necessarily engage in conversation with them. Thanking the bartender when her drink was served she tapped her watch on the reader and then settled in to work. One of the key benefits of being a mostly distributed worker was that she was able to work anywhere which meant she could come home to celebrate her parents fiftieth wedding anniversary.

One of the key downfalls of being a distributed worker was that her parents absolutely did not understand the concept that she could be at work while sat on the couch. It was kind and well meaning but barely fifteen minutes would go by without the offer of a snack, a walk, a request for help or the suggestion they go out in the garden. If she actually wanted to focus she had to get out and as it was a small town there wasn't exactly an abundance of co-working spaces and the library had long closed. So a pub it was. She didn't have any calls so it was fine. Reaching into her bag she put her glasses on and pushed her lilac hair out of her face as she settled in to work.

A group of women entered the pub laughing in unison about an hour later and broke her out of her focus mode. Taking it as an opportunity to order another gin and tonic she sat up straight in her chair and stretched slightly, her long hair slipping off her shoulders as she tilted her head from side to side and drew her shoulders back until she felt that satisfying click. As she waited for her drink she adjusted the rings on her fingers, twisting them slightly in place before taking the cold glass and saying a soft thank you. There were so many deadlines and things to be on top of her mind felt like it was bursting at the seams trying to prioritise and re-prioritise in order to not let any of the balls drop. She was about to start going through her project updates when she felt someone come and stand next to her at the bar. Giving them a brief glance she turned her attention back to her screen only to jump when she heard her name.

"Lua?"

"Yes?" She started to respond before she had even clocked the person only to feel her stomach twist when she met their eyes. "Oh. Hi! Sorry. I didn't see you there. How are you?" It had been nearly fifteen years and yet Lua would have recognised that face in an instant. Of course, she had matured from the last time they were together but those bright, grey yellow eyes still had that mischievous sparkle.

Margot smiled brightly and leaned in for a hug, drawing Lua close and kissing her cheek. "It has been so long! What're you doing home? You moved away right?"

Lua moved her MacBook to one side before it was knocked off and embraced her lightly, smelling that familiar sweet scent of peach and pineapple that she had always associated with her. "Yeah. Yeah! I moved to London about ten years ago. How about you?"

Pulling back Margot slid her fingers into the pockets of her dark grey jeans, a string of tattoos now lining her left arm in a mosaic of different colour and illustrations. "I live in London too now. I'm just home for my brothers graduation ceremony. It's really good to see you. How have you been?"

Lua sipped her drink as she felt nervousness start to flush through her, seeing the confidence and comfort that had always come so easily for Margot. "Good! Yeah. I'm working for a start up in Shoreditch... How about you?"

"One of those bean bag places that let dogs come to work?" Margot asked with a wink.

"Something like that yeah," Lua laughed softly.

"I'm an English teacher. It's pretty good... the kids are wild." Margot admitted with a quiet laugh.

"Wow. I bet... I couldn't do that," Lua admitted, shaking her head. "But that's great. I always remember you loving to read." Lua said without thinking and for just a moment she was transported back to a much more tender moment. Laying in a field just off of the golf course, the sun shining brightly as she rested her head in Margot's lap, Margot's fingers carding through her hair lazily as she read aloud from The Price of Salt. At the memory Lua could feel her face getting a little hot and so she turned back to her drink. "Congratulations to your brother anyway."

Margot didn't respond to the reading comment, her eyes just lingering on Lua for a moment as she took her in, a little knowing smile playing on her features for a moment, letting the silence hold for just a little moment. "Yeah we're super proud of him. He's going to go doss around for a year after this but it's well deserved." She smiled only to look over her shoulder when her friends called her name and asked why their drinks were taking so long. "I had better get the round in or they're going to get fairy," she admitted with a soft laugh. "I don't think I have you on instagram. What's your username?" She asked as she pulled out her phone.

Lua wasn't the most avid social media user, preferring to observe more than post but she at least had an account and so she gave her the username and picked up her own phone to follow her back when the request came in. "Good to see you." Lua affirmed.

"Yes! Definitely. If you're around for a while it'd be good to meet up? Catch up properly?" She said and then leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to Lua's cheek before picking up the tray of drinks that had been prepared for her and giving Lua a wink and a wave before heading back to her table.

Lua turned back to her laptop and breathed out slowly, unaware of how tense her body had become the whole time they were talking. Picking up her drink she took a sip, enjoying the soft rattle of the ice as it moved around the glass. This was okay. It was absolutely okay. Stealing a glance over at the table she saw Margot sat in the middle of the group holding court, all of the other women hanging on every word like flowers turning towards the sun. Turning back to her screen she tried to get her focus back into her work but each time she tried she found herself looking back over at the table. Not wanting to look like a creep she packed up her things, paid up and headed out.

Back in her childhood bedroom Lua opened the window to let some of the cool night air in as she changed into her pyjamas. It was unusual for it to be that warm in the UK but this Spring had started off warm and seemed set to only get warmer. Pulling up her delicate white cotton shorts and a camisole she stretched out in bed and replied to a few messages she had received when she was out. The notification of Margot following her back caught her eye and even if she knew it was a bad idea she couldn't help but look. She had over eight thousand followers on instagram which seemed like a lot for a teacher but as Lua scrolled through she could understand why.

Margot had always been beautiful, even when they had first met even despite the dowdy, old fashioned clothes her parents had permitted her to wear and her beautiful white blonde hair that was always firmly plaited back from her face her delicate bone structure and beautiful smile that lit up her whole face had shone through. Over time Margot had ditched the boxy, floral calf length dresses and switched to cigar cut trousers and fitted shirts that highlighted her curves. Her long hair that had previously gone down to her waist now sheared into a short shaggy bob with bangs and it all suited her beautifully.

She had grown into a stylish woman who lived her life out loud and Lua couldn't help but be happy for her given where she had started. Despite herself she couldn't help but linger on some of the bikini photos she had posted before scolding herself for being a creep. Reaching for her glass of water she leaned across the bed while still holding her phone and as she sank back against her pillows she realised she had liked a photo. Panic flashed through her when she realised the photo was from three years ago. She went to unlike it but realised the damage was already done as she'd still get the notification. Even though she was alone she could feel her skin flushing pink at the mortifying truth. A woman she hadn't seen in fifteen years who had pretty much ghosted her after their time together was about to see she had been scrolling through her feed. There was nothing she could do now so it was best just to put the day to an end. She was about to take a sleeping pill so the spiralling thoughts of doom and despair didn't keep her up when she saw a message:

Margot: Hi. I love that photo too. Almost forgot about it it was so long ago...

Lua: ...I am dying please do not make it worse.

Margot: If it helps I've been scrolling through yours too. I actually went back eight years but that's mostly because you only have about fifty photos total.

Lua: I don't really like social media.

Margot: Clearly. Pretty hard to get an understanding of your life since I last saw you when there's no content

Lua: Do you think I've got a good picture of your life from yours? I've got a highlights reel.

Margot: What do you mean? My life is literally just holidays, parties and very beautiful breakfasts

Lua: Totally. No bad days. Only vibes.

Margot: All vibes all the time. It was surprising but really good to see you today. I didn't realise I missed you till I saw you.

Lua: ...thanks? I think?

Margot: Not in a rude way. Just. It was really good to see you.

Lua: It was nice to see you too. Unexpected.

Margot: Could we meet up while you're home? Just the two of us?

Lua: Sure. I'm free tomorrow if you are?

Margot: I'm free. I have the house to myself. Do you want to come over for dinner?

Lua: Sounds good to me. I can come at 7?

Margot: It's a date. What're you up to now?

Lua: I was just about to go to sleep. What're you doing?

Margot: Watching porn.

Lua: You are not.

Margot: I really am. Enjoying maybe a bit too much.

Lua: Whatever. I don't believe you. Your parents are so strict they probably still have

child control on the home wifi.

Margot: That's actually true. I tried to go on a swimsuit website and it was blocked for obscene content.

Lua: Wow. Your parents were always intense.

Margot: Age has not mellowed them at all.

Lua: I didn't think it would have. Old people aren't known for becoming more liberal as they get older.

Margot: They still don't know I'm gay

Lua: I'm sorry. That must be tough.

Margot: Eh. It's not so bad. I haven't had many long term partners anyway so it's never been an issue. They just think I haven't met the right man yet. I'm 'choosy' apparently.

Lua: Rather be known as choosy than hopeless like I am with my parents. They know I'm gay and so there's no excuses for me.

Margot: You're not hopeless. You're shy.

Lua: Thanks... I need to get to sleep. I'll see you tomorrow?

Margot: Sweet dreams xo

Lua lay there staring at her phone and found herself smiling. There was something about speaking to Margot that always made her feel good, like a light had been kindled inside her that warmed her with its glow. On some level she knew seeing her wasn't a great idea but the idea of feeling this warmth for a little longer was too enticing to pass up. They could be friends. It was just one dinner. Catching up. Setting her phone on the nightstand so it could charge, she curled up in her sheets and settled in for sleep.

Walking up the path to that familiar home Lua could smell the sweet scent of the hyacinths that were planted all along the path to the front door. The scent took her right back to the start, the racing heart and sweaty palms of being young and consumed with infatuation. Standing outside of the front door she couldn't help but pull at her skirt to make it sit better, carding her fingers through her hair self consciously.

"Hello!" Margot said happily as she opened the door, a glass of Prosecco in one hand as she curled her arm around Lua with the other. "Come in - this for you..."

Lua hugged her back and went to kiss her cheek but thought better of it as she accepted the glass. "Thank you..." Stepping through the threshold she looked around and literally nothing had been changed since she had last been in the house, the whole place feeling like a time warp to the seventies as their home had been dated even when they were teenagers. "Where are your parents tonight?"

"My Dad is speaking at a conference tomorrow so my Mum went with him overnight... and my brother is at his girlfriends." Lua said as she walked through to the canary yellow kitchen with the black and white checkered flooring.

"You know... your parents have kept everything so long that it's actually almost trendy again," Lua laughed as she looked at the cat clock that's eyes were still ticking back and forth after all these years.

"Oh my god I know," Margot groaned as she went over to the pot on the stove and gave it a stir. "Like...I've said to them it is okay to replace things but you know what they're like," she sighed, shaking her head. "I forgot to ask about dietaries or preferences... are you...?"

Lua shook her head. "I eat everything. You're all good," she smiled. "Can I help with anything at all?"

Margot shook her head. "Nope. I am almost done. Cooking isn't really my thing so just tell me it's great," she teased.

Lua watched as she moved around the kitchen, always a flurry of activity and motion.

Dressed in a simple pair of denim cut off shorts and a striped crop top that hovered just above the hem of her shorts she looked effortlessly beautiful.

"Okay. Right. The garlic bread was apparently made fresh today from M&S so it should be good..." Margot smiled as she set a tray with a baguette on the table and then two bowls of prawn linguine.

"M&S... fancy..." Lua winked. "Thank you - this looks genuinely delicious."

"Cheers," Margot smiled and clinked their glasses together. "To rekindling old friendships."

Lua nodded but the choice of words gave her pause. They hadn't just been friends before. Was she trying to diminish it? Pretend it hadn't happen? Margot was already talking about something else so Lua forced herself to let go of the point, smiling as she started to eat and as had been the case even when they were young Margot did most of the talking while she listened.

After they'd eaten they'd gone into the living room to continue hanging out, the first bottle of Prosecco long finished as they made good progress through the second. Both women were lounging on the same couch, glasses held loosely in one hand as they leaned sideways into the couch to face one another.

"And I saw that tv show... Fleabag... and it reminded me so much of you." Margot laughed, shaking her head.

"What do you mean?" Lua asked with a smile, having seen the show but not having seen herself in any of the characters.

"Like. Fleabag? You're her." Margot said as she reached for the bottle, pouring out the final contents into both of their glasses. "Like... we're here. But you're here and also with yourself."

"What does that even mean?" Lua laughed, thanking her as she took another sip of her drink.

"Like. You're talking to me but there's the internal monologue. What does this mean. How do I feel. Noticing ten other things all at once. You're never - you're never fully present." Margot smiled and set her glass down. "It - I can always see the cogs turning. You're an over thinker."

"Well that's a relief. I thought you were saying my entire life is a mess and I'm a narcissist." Lua teased.

"Well that too. Obviously," Margot winked. "Just without the chronic need for male validation."

"Yeah it's just women for me," Lua admitted with a shy laugh but even as she said it, it all felt like it was hitting a little too close to home.

"You." Margot began, reaching out and resting her hand on Lua's bare thigh and giving It a squeeze. "You need to learn to relax. You miss so much worrying about the next thing you don't enjoy the current thing."

Lua rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Why do I feel like I'm at the beginning of an early two thousands indie film and you're about to take me on some journey of self discovery?"

Margot rolled her eyes at that and she shook her head. "I'm not your manic pixie dream girl. We're both a little too old for that," she teased, her thumb just gently massaging on the inside of her thigh above her knee.

Lua felt her insides shiver slightly at that motion, her cheeks flushed from the booze but also the motion. "Speak for yourself..."

"You're older than me!" Margot protested and shook her head.

"By two years. Barely." Lua tutted and shook her head. "This is the thing with mental illness though.. as much as I'd love to just say 'hey let's stop being anxious about everything' that's not really how it works. Like, I'm not sat here enjoying the way my mind works. I take medication. I exercise. I have a therapist. It's just a thing that isn't going away."

Margot's smile dimmed a little at that and she twisted her lips, giving Lua's knee another squeeze. "Sorry. I wasn't trying to be flippant or anything... I just know you used to stand in your own way a lot and I can sometimes see on your face that you're a little in your head."

Lua nodded in agreement as she settled her champagne glass onto the coffee table and she shrugged. "You're not wrong? I would love to be the sort of person who had more space in my head. Who didn't have a constant internal monologue accompanied by a critical voice alongside it. I can make the voice quieter but making it go away entirely is... well. Not something I've accomplished yet."

Margot nodded and reached out with her free hand, tucking some of Lua's lilac hair behind her ear, her fingertips just briefly brushing over the soft skin of her earlobe. "I -" she went to speak but instead she leaned in slowly and let her lips gently graze over Lua's, giving her the space to pull back if she wasn't into it.

Lua smiled as their lips met, that familiar smell of her skin filling her senses as she reached out to cup her cheek as they kissed sweetly, their lips reacquainting themselves as they both scooted closer on the couch to one another. As their lips started to linger longer together Lua let her fingers softly drag down the curve of Margot's neck, feeling the other woman's pulse beneath her fingertips as their lips began to part. Margot's tongue brushing against her own as her arms encircled her waist pulling her close earned a soft pleased moan from Lua. It had been such a long time since she had been in this position that she couldn't help but savour every brush of their tongues, the soft nip at her lips as they explored one another.

Margot's hands slid over Lua's soft hips and down to her curvy behind, giving it a gentle squeeze. "Mmm - see? You just need to lose yourself in me."