All Comments on 'Promotion Question'

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3 stars

Nothing jumped out as being awry

Short. Concise. And to the point.

Well done.

Well done. A bit short for my tastes, but well-written.

Thank you for a nicely focussed story. It's a familiar theme (aren't most LW stories?) which you develop in an interesting way with the emphasis put on the betrayal of their affection.

Here's the sentence in this one that got my goat:

"I needed to know how much damage had been done to my marriage."

...

She just admitted to fucking her boss.

At this point, all the cuddling by the fire nonsense doesn't mean anything at all.

She had sex with another man. Now all the trust and respect in their marriage is destroyed.

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The rules for male and female infidelity are not the same. Wives can often forgive their husband cheating if it's "just sex" and he didn't fall in love with the other woman. Cheating wives mistakenly believe that men are the same, which is why they use that excuse.

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For men, the converse us true. I could probably forgive an emotional affair, as long as nothing physical occurred. The wife used some other guy as an emotional tampon... big deal, it's like her having a gay best friend. But if there was anything physical going on, it's over. The idea of forgiving a wife who let another man use her as a cum dump is absolutely nauseating. How could you ever kiss her again, knowing she sucked some other guy's cock?

How important is your job! I remember The Troubador.

4

it wss going well but then you stopped, there could have been more good moments but you stopped short. at least no cucks here.

The wind-up didn’t match the pitch.

That’s ‘redneck speak’ for the ending was anticlimactic, undeveloped or just plain too short. Take your pick. At least it didn’t suck.

We all get caught when we least expect it. Dumb bitch.

I understand the intention here, but unfortunately the effort didn't match the desire.

A simple plot: an ambitious, but unfaithful wife. A sleeze for her boss, and the wife's husband away for a couple of days. That was it: no real story, no characterization, aside from the fact the main character thought he had some sort of super power and could tell what everyone else was thinking, and why that was included I have no idea, as it had absolutely nothing to do with the story anyway. The discovery was weak, he comes home early, she been fucking her lover, and for some reason she turned her phone off, why?

It all revolved around her missing his messages, but it was all so half arsed and lazy. It was claimed to be inspired by another story, inspired is the last word I'd use to describe it.

Open ended. Needs another chapter

Where's the story?

More notes from the author than actual story.

@Author

This site does have a forum.

The line that gets my goat in so many of these stories is “If you'd come home after the sex I might, just might have almost forgiven you for a one-off mistake of fucking your boss.” Over and over authors have the MC say that they would have forgiven a one time event, or at least considered it. I think that’s bullshit. Unless a man is a moral degenerate, he doesn’t want a woman after she allowed another man to touch her. He would be disgusted, and unable to ever touch her again!

ZK

I hope he goes through with the divorce but with statements like “If you'd come home after the sex I might, just might have almost forgiven you for a one-off mistake of fucking your boss” you can see with a little bit of puppy dog eyes and a generous amount of quivering lip he’ll probably cave.

Punctuation errors abound but in essence not a bad addition to the original, it had its fair share of clichéd lines like ‘it was just sex, it wasn’t making love’ (why would that make any difference) or the ever ridiculous ‘you were never going to find out’ (and if you hadn’t I could have happily continued).

Very well done. The MC reacted appropriately to her cheating. It was not “just sex”. And it almost certainly never would have been “just once”. Fiona was either a complete blithering idiot, or ( more likely) a self absorbed fool.

.

Nicely done for such a short offering.

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5 *****

Great little pocket tale!

not bad but I think the show in the after work celebration of leaning in head to head was something that would have been mentioned. He was far too calm.

Eh, nothing new here.

We're the hints of Ralph & Fiona being overly affectionate at the after work get together just BS ... Or was there already an affair going on that she hasn't admitted to?

Love how Fiona, in true LW style, doesn't apologize for her actions. Instead she just keeps telling Bob if he hadn't found out he wouldn't have been hurt.

Bob was absolutely right in that the cuddling & and kissing in front of the fire and her spending the night snuggled up in Ralph's arms shows that this wasn't "just sex"

Proper way to handle a slut who will fuck to advance. Hope she gets her next promotion. Sounds like she is going to need it. ONE AND DONE, DISRESPECT, NO TRUST ANYMORE....FUCK THE LOVE YOU MAY FEEL, IT WILL DIE IN TIME! The marriage is over and trying to move past it is a waste of his time and she is no longer worth it. Even if kids were involved, they are better off knowing the truth and are resilient enough to be stronger because of it. Hell of a way to teach that actions have consequences. But, this is one way that they will never forget. People who cheat are not worth the effort to understand or make excuses for. You can't stay faithful don't ever get married, easy way to prevent being a waste of time.

Solid story. I do wish wish Ralph had received a 'fitting retort'.. still though 5 stars and a fave.

Simple solution. If she did it once she’ll do it again. Cut your losses and move on. Plenty of other women available.

Just to short and unfinished. Sorry.

It's never "just sex"

I really liked it because the husband stood up to the cheater and put her out. Plus the other party was told about it. Things can still be worked out.

Good ending. No right minded husband would or should forgive what she did.

I'm glad he showed her the door and didn't wimp out. Wait a day or two then pay Ralph a visit. Predators like him need a lesson so he won't do this again. Ralph and Fiona will need new places to live, you know they will bunk together somewhere until they drive each other crazy and split. Their jobs won't survive after Bob pays a visit to their office and management. Good thing there were no kids to be hurt.

good story five stars

I liked it but would have liked to have read about the aftermath. 4 stars

The fact that Fiona and Ralph were exchanging public displays of affection in public at the team meeting was a sure sign its wasn't just sex and a thank you. If Fiona wanted to thank Ralph then buy him an expensive bottle or win or a box of fine cigars, They had sex because they fancied one another. Bob was right, Fiona can expect no help or respect at work any more once word of her and Ralph having sex gets out and about the office. Its never just sex...its about lying, disrespect and manipulation. Tying to say that Bob wasn't suppose to know so that made it OK and wouldn't hurt Bob is like expecting not knowing he has cancer won't hurt Bob. For Bob, infidelity was a relationship deal breaker. Good on Bob for not accepting Fiona's pathetic selfish and self pitying excuses. Fiona torched the marriage there's nothing she could possibly do to make it up to Bob.

1* for no epilogue. Writers think they're clever with the, "Leave it up to your imagination!" line, but we actually like stories wrapped up.

He did what had to be done. Kicked the cunt out. She thought it was no big deal. I think if the husband was the cheater she would have been out for blood and a pair of nuts. Then it would have been a very big deal to her

Good job. Played out perfectly. Thanks for sharing

Not erotic.

"When I was being taught how to investigate these accidents," - This sentence probably should have been in the prior paragraph when he was talking about his job. Placed here it seem like he learned it when he went to teach his techniques.

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"I said I should thank him if only I knew how." - She DID thank him: "I couldn't have done it without you Ralph" - The words might not be there, but that's a thank you.

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"he and Carol had an open marriage" - If they had an open marriage, then why did it matter that Carol was visiting her mother?

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The whole idea of fucking as a business thank you is so out there as to require a bit too much suspension of disbelief for me, not that I haven't enjoyed the original and many of the fo;;-ups.

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"So, using the Troubador's theme I have generated my own story." - I don't think there was enough of a difference to claim this as your own story.

I've enjoyed all your stories. This one was a bit short. Yeah, he got hurt the bastard, Ralph a little by telling his wife an asking about the open marriage.

One thing that I wondered. A bit nefarious to add to the plot, but was Bob's accident that got him out of the picture so Fiona could be promoted, really an accident? I had the idea when you mentioned he was an accident investigator. Maybe Fiona was not in on that but it was a ploy to get into her panties. You did not go there and ended this with verbal confrontation then kicking her out. I still gave you 4 stars for a well written if not wholly satisfactory story.

Fairly well written, but did not like the story at all. Husband is painted as a weak rigid man who couldn't handle reality.

Probably 2/3 of the BTB stories written here in LW shouldn't be BTB

Well ...

A good part of this short story

questioned if she fucked her boss

as a whore or a lover.

Did that matter?

And if it did; Why?

Still, I like stories of guys taking out the trash.

4 out of 5 from me.

Looking

Looking forward to the long story.

Tilan calm down, you've got spittle flying of your lips. We can see it in the comments below.

The thing about Fiona is, she doesn't think through her method of providing an appropriate thank-you. Thanks can be offered through an extremely wide spectrum of means. They range from the simplest verbal 'thanks' all the way to providing an extremely elaborate or expensive gift in conjunction with the thanks. Thanks can be offered in a private or very public manner as well. Fiona, and her counterparts found in countless stories like hers, makes the error in good judgment that says sex with their male manager/boss/authority figure is the proper way to express thanks. If you're a woman reading this, would you have sex with any man to thank him...if you were also a man? Probably not. So why in these stories do women allow themselves to be coerced into an immoral and possibly illegal act just to say 'thank you for your help'? The US does have laws about this stuff. Document, record, copy texts and emails, video if possible when the bastard hints that opening your thighs would be a good start on the way to 'saying thanks'.

Liked it... A nice story where the wronged party takes action. and not too much action, nor too little - just right.

'I can possibly forgive the sex, but I will not forgive the intimacy.' That is really such a crock of a sentiment, if true. The story concept isn't bad (if well overdone), but its execution is very lacking and undistinguishable from others. A decent-ish 4*.

I purposely left the end open, if you want it finished, then crack on, have a go.

Observation of facial expression and body language is not a super power. It's something we all do.

I have noticed that the majority of criticism (not all) comes from people who have yet to contribute.

But thank you to the constructive criticism, that always welcome.

I do have an ending, it's almost finished, but most of you won't like it, but guess what, I don't care.

I give the wife credit for telling the truth once caught.

The husband is a bit of an insecure jerk, he thinks he's James Bond for reading body language and putting 2+2 together.

And he doesn't give the wife credit for believing her boxer's "open marriage" line.

Very well done

Short with not much character development. When he picked up on the stuff at the bar, he should have been a lot more forceful. You know...if you see something, say something! D

There is no "...you would never know." There is only "I will never do." She isn't marriage material.

I lot left our. How long where they married.? Any children? Was this a 1 off? It looks like she is a self centered person. The marriage may not be salvageable but you need more info. Giving the guy the love you gave your husband is definitely a deal breaker. Cold and calculated. End of story!

Same old bull shit. Tell me in what state can you kick your wife out of the house you both live in. I tell you none. Without a court agreement with both parties never can happen. The kicker can be arrested too. So much for all these authors using this stupid illegal BS in their stories.

He asked way too many questions, and acts like his decision was based on cuddling, not her fucking her way up the latter. Then again, he's a Brit and they apparently have cuck built into their DNA. All he *really* needed to hear was she fucked the guy. Game over.

Sorry people, I shouldn't have to do this. I am not in America. The law in the UK is different. Although most laws are derived from the Magna Carta.

Some of you out there have got my intention spot on, brilliant, I hope you enjoyed the fiction.

Others are on the far side of the Sun.

Anony-"same old bull shit". Your comment might be on spot if you knew what you were talking about. Since there is not an M3,M5 etc in the US it is obvious that the author is in England--therefore you likely do not know English law.

I believe in the UK, one can accuse Fiona going a bridge too far. "A FU*KING bridge too far!" Great job capturing the essence of that nuance from the original story. 5/5

The story isnt bad as such, the problem is like many cheating wife stories the story is well trod territory. When using a well worn plot ( in this case the predatory boss ) the trick is how do you make it different, put your own spin on it?

The differentiating of love vs sex, her having emotion for the guy she fucked, is huge. The problem is the story really doesn't go beyond a high level.

If the story is planned to be continued I would note it in the title, ppl get irritated w stories that seem incomplete.

All the people who criticize stories should write one themselves / l read these stories to see how the author handles these situations that he writes about l don’t always agree but l give the author a lot of credit for even posting these stories just to get some feedback it takes a lot of guts just to post these stories

Anonymous below.

The story starts in a pub. Work takes the MC away to Derby. But it didn't occur to you he doesn't live in a 'state' at all. He lives in an English county. I suspect your grasp of English law, is about as good as your knowledge of geography.

Anonymous below that:

Two mistakes in the first nine words should disqualify you from commenting. Another typical American - trying to read British English - detail, detail, detail. What colour were her panties? How many buttons on his shirt? Why don't you just accept the story? You're clearly incapable of writting on yorselv!

I gave it a three to be courteous. The story was completely unfinished.

You have nothing here, no story, nothing but regurgitated idea used many times. And a lot of blabber.

Good start, least different names were used though followed a similar story

@Anonymous, at least I have an ID, if you don't like my comments no one is forcing you to read them. I, unfortunately, have to read anonymous comments in order to find that they've been written by a troll.

OK, I'm giving this a QuickMagazine 4, pending re-reading "How High A Price," which LJA644 states inspired this. One must assume the ambition here was to kick off multiple sequels, a la "HHAP," and fellow co-champs "One Slip" and "Law Of The Heart" - co-champs (at close to 10 knock-off's each), that is, until they were obliterated by "Just Once..." by Kalimaxos, which to date has around 40 follow-on's. Meanwhile, the relative newcomer Tilan is wrong, as usual. Those earlier three stories not only had nothing to do with "February Sucks" (it's only real antecedent is "Unintended Consequences" by BigGuy33), but also are a different type of story phenomenon. Those three, like "Just Once..." and this story, are invitationals - in that the author invites others to carry the story forward. FS, on the other hand, was a completed (and masterful) story, the outcome of which bothered many, thus inspiring multitudes (around 80 thus far) to re-write it from some point within the original, in order for its events to come out more to their liking. The biggest early days precedent for what happened with FS is "Something We Have To Talk About" by nici, which got re-worked by close to as many as did those 3 early days invitationals. Anyway, enough information. Back to this. I really like the fact that LJA644 weighs in here on the comments. In fact, think I'll bump this up to a 5 because of it! While this is one solid story, I doubt it will be any kind of "Just Once..." event, since the tale is fairly complete as is (divorces for both cheaters are clearly on the docket). Sure, one could sequel what happens next for the 4 (divorced) principals, but I doubt many (if any) will bother. By contrast, note that "Just Once..." presented the question of what Rick would do next (divorce Marcy? take Leslie up on her offer? or what?) in a highly-charged scenario. By contrast, "Promotion Question" doesn't pose much mystery. Clearly, it doesn't matter to Bob whether this was a one-off, or the start of an affair, he's out of there. And by exposing the charade to Carol, Ralph will clearly suffer the same fate as Fiona. And serves them right. I'm not talking BTB - which, in any event, should be changed to "BTC" (burn the cheater) (or, burn the cheaters).

@Darkdonut2 /quote/ You have nothing here, no story, nothing but regurgitated idea used many times. And a lot of blabber. /end quote/

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Look! Another asshat who's written NOTHING complaining about the quality of an amateur writing on a FREE website! Is this level of idiocy genetic or hard-won? Show us how it's done, FOOL!

2 for a good start. But, in all seriousness, why start if you can't or won't finish?

While I find that too much of the story was based on the "How Hight a Price" story, I did love that Bob didn't fool around, taking his wife's phone to call his wife's lover's wife. Comparing what she did with Ralph & her hubby, then having the suitcase already packed. Unlike the "host" story, there's no wishy washy, Bob took decisive action. However, the amount of sameness defeats the purpose of writing another story. Because of that, I can only do 3 stars. Bob

1* FTDS

Does seem odd that she would have mobile phone off all day at work

I could only give it a 3 because it was another author's story. I liked the ending. Why don't you try your own beginning as well?

Over too quickly. It was a decent introduction.

Average paint by numbers cheating wives tale.

Thin. Cliched.

sbrooks103x I take on board most of your comments, they are correct, however if I had gone down that route there would have been no story. I do like your last comment about anonymous commentators and the words in your Bio. I have also noticed that many -ve comments come from people who have not published anything themselves.

Well if they think they can do a better job, finish my story, here is the opportunity. I have completed my ending, although it will need some tweaking after the constructive criticism I have received.

LJA

Actually, after re-reading this again, as I thought my rating might've been too low, there's enough of a distance between the original story & this re-write. Along with (which I liked a great deal) the husband's firm determination after the questioning - no running to bars or crying at night, etc., I raise my rating to 4 stars.

But for the author in his comment below concerning those who haven't published: that's a poor reason to dis, purposely or not, somebody's comment. Many people, including too many authors on this site, have poor understanding of spelling, word usage, & esp. punctuation. I'm thankful of the stories I've read from you, you are def NOT one of them. However, having said the above, many comments read, here & elsewhere, have been pure bullshit, wanting the wife & whomever to burn completely, whether indicated or not.

But as a writer, you open yourself up to all. Personally, I always try to have my comments constructive ones. And, if I might say, insofar as this story goes, I'm happy with the ending. However, if you want to add a bit more, a 2nd chapter, I'm sure having read other stories from you, it'll be good. :) Bob

Very good. I quite enjoyed it. You had a choice to make, keep it short and on point or elaborate and tell a fuller story. I like both. Good job.

A very good direct rendition. The phone stuff was pretty extensive- nowadays one doesn’t miss a call on a cell for love or money, so turning a phone off is pretty blatant. Regardless, everyone got their just desserts.

The "one-off" bullshit at the end loses 2 stars

> "I'm going to ask you some questions; one single lie and you're out that door with your small bag and what you stand up in. And I will be seeing a solicitor on Monday morning."

Pointless threat. She told the truth and still got kicked out.

No reason for her to comply, if the outcome is the same. Lying in this situation at least gives a chance.

Stupid interrogation tactic on mc's part .

I liked it, 4/5

why so much gloating about body language deep knowledge...........

he never tried to get the straight results from the hint

just like a fool he pre-informed her about his own moves..........

her badluck she stayed with her boss.... otherwise she was clean and clear

and at last one-off .................... what a pathetic loser

Nice, I like how you ended it

Well done, this was not only well written but draws you in and makes you feel the emotions he felt as he went through the process and then her feelings as the situation was shifted onto her when he found others that rebuilt his self esteem.

Good one

4/5

It seems unlikely that in this day and age, she would have actually turned her phone off. Surely she would expect a call however routine from her husband at some point, having it turned off raises suspicions and questions that she didn’t want to answer.

Very interesting so FTDS

The alarm bells would have started ringing as soon as Ralph said that one of the rules of his and Carol's open marriage was no sex in the marital bed. If they were genuinely OK with each other having it off with third parties then why would it matter where either of them chose to do so?

I'm not opposed to short stories, indeed sometimes less is more but this one definitely needed to be longer, detailing the fallout from the impending divorce and the knock on effect for Ralph and Carol. Such as it was, though it was a very good story from a very gifted author.

The author misses the point in his comment below. Just because I'm an anon it doesn't make my opinion any less valid than his. I can't speak for all anons, only for myself and the whole point is I DON'T think I can do better than him, that's why I want HIM to FTDS. Authors need to stop being so precious about criticism and instead learn from it and grow. In my last comment I gave this story a good write up with a few pointers as to how I thought it could have been made even better. I don't have sufficient creative talent to write a story myself which is part of the reason I read other people's work on this site. Be careful what you wish for; the last thing we need is to have the reading space cluttered up with even more talentless drivel than there already is.

I enjoyed the story but the comments might be even better. Clueless idiots who can’t figure out the story takes place in England. Commenters trying to clue in the idiots while others just attack English people as a group. Anon trolls attacking the author and other commenters. The author and the commenters fighting back and even the trolls going back in for more abuse. Throw in the spelling and grammar nazis and this comment thread has something for everyone.

Feels incomplete

My mind was in a turmoil. "Am I not good enough for you, d'you want more than I can give you, is he bigger than me, is he better than me, does he last longer, what actually happened?" I wasn't sure how much I wanted to know. I was frightened of the answers that I might get. But it was too late, I'd asked the questions. I would have to put up with the answers.

Was this really required? It seems that all writers will insert this para irrespective if it fits the context or not!

@sbrooks103x

@Anonymous, at least I have an ID, if you don't like my comments no one is forcing you to read them. I, unfortunately, have to read anonymous comments in order to find that they've been written by a troll. -

YOU DO NOT, "have to read anonymous comments" NO ONE is forcing you to read anything.

Aww man, brilliant story (as always), but can we get another chapter? Ralph and Fiona are monstrous! Bob needs to divorce her imo. Sex is the most intimate act two humans can do, if she's willing to just give it away as a 'thank you' then she's insane. Then she also gave away the intimacy and emotional connection by snuggling with Ralph in from of the fire. Fiona betrayed him in the worst way possible.

What happens when another man helps her out in a greater way?

This is an EXCELLENT companion to How High a Price.

Fiona is really dumb. Just believe her boss about an open marriage? Wasn't Carol a supposed friend? And somehow she gets sucked in by his lie? Easier to believe she got duped by a stranger with no knowledge of his marriage. Thr only once question is extremely valid. Doing it anywhere near the promotion is just stupid, before or after. And yes the author hit the nail on the head. It isn't just the sex. It is the shared intimacy and post coital interactions as well. That pretty much kills the marriage. Don't think there needs to be more of an ending. Clearly they are getting a divorce. Carol will divorce her boss. And the filings will bring matters to light in the company. Fiona may not lose her job yo avoid a sexual harassment case (maybe) but she will be viewed differently by all her colleagues and will be a pariah at work. She will probably transfer or leave town. They didn't appear to have kids. Her boss gets nuked. How the boss thought this was a good idea is surreal. But then again 75% of married women and 67% of married women admit they would have an affair if they knew for certainty they would never get found out. Repulsive but nonetheless true. Any wonder why divorce rates are so high. Even if adultery is never involved, anyone who would seek an affair if they knew they coukd not be discovered, means their marriage is not strong in thr face of life's many challenges.

Decent overall story, but... I've some concerns. 1) hubby asks questions he's not sure he wants to know the answer to. They why the hell ask? But in this case, where his wife was unfaithful, why doesn't he want to know the answers?

2) She tells him that he wasn't supposed to know, so it wouldn't hurt him. That's wonderful coming from a wife that loves him. (sarcastic) But the husband doesn't pick up on that the 2 or so times it's said.

3) Instead of threatening to look into her overnight bag, he should've grabbed it & looked. Take pictures of what's inside.

4) She falls for the line of an open marriage; being a friend of the guy's wife, wouldn't she be aware of that if true? Hubby never goes into the possibility of a 2nd time, esp. after asking what they did by the fire afterwards.

The above not withstanding, this was a nice add on to the "How High A Price", but could've gone in a bit more depth instead of almost a summary of what happened. Was initially thinking 4 stars, but after writing this, 3. Bob

... and yes, the fact that in your story the breaking point wasn't the cheating AND the lying, but cuddling, is also telling. Who cares if she cuddled or not. She's female, they like cuddling - many, more than sex (hell, I'm male and I like cuddling more than sex, in many cases). No woman will forego a cuddle if offered - often even if they reject sex.

Very good beginning to your ending. I gave it 5 stars. Hope you write another chapter, so we can read what happens to everyone involved.

ps- Just once, I would like to hear the wife say” you caught me. I will pack a bag and leave now. Please send the divorce papers to my parents. I am sorry for betraying you. I do not deserve to be married, to someone as wonderful as you. I will go to counseling to try to figure out, what’s wrong with me. I won’t fight the divorce, just be fair....

As we all know, women like to “ win the spin”. This basically means controlling what information gets out there about her cheating, and making the ex-husband out to be a bad guy. Women historically, have had to rely on men for protection. Since they are physically weaker, they tend to form alliances by becoming very good at verbal communication. Most guys who discover a wife cheating, will not go broadcast it and shout it from the tree tops. They tend to internalize their anger. The biggest thing a woman fears in these situations, is another woman spinning a different version of the story to her friends, co workers and relatives. This makes women go out of their way not to poach each other’s men. So by doing that is this story, the wife is either a Narcissist or has severe mental problems. One thing a lot of men could do better, is exactly what the husband did in this scenario. Interrogate her immediately, before she has a chance to concoct some lies. Calling her bosses wife ( supposed best friend) was a real good move. This is going to spread like wildfire, and will absolutely trash her reputation at work, and lose her some friends as well. Most women will be thinking if she does this to her best friend, what will she try with my husband? Poof. Support network destroyed. Excellent story. Proves you can burn a botch, without violence. 5 stars!

" Since they are weaker, they tend to form alliances by becoming very good at verbal communication..." If you're a man, consider learning verbal and written communication. That way, you could get some actual, personal experience with a woman. That way, your opinions wouldn't sound so incredibly sexist.

Wanted to find out how much damage had been done to the marriage? If she had come home right after it could have been OK? WTF ARE YOU SMOKING? Or, is this potential acceptance of cold-blooded betrayal a "thing" in the UK? 2.

Rubbish from a normally very good author.