All Comments on 'Rehab 101'

to get her into this jam anyhow? It seems like there are a few pages missing.

The editing really needs to be cleaned up. Parts were hard to read.

Grey Eagle:

It's different, but overall good. To answer Dynamite's query about how Terry got herself into the situation: A very good author (whose name I don't recall right now) wrote a story (The name of which escapes me). His wife got in serious doo doo and after it was all over, and the somke had cleared, explained her stepping in it (paraphrased by myself) by merely saying that she probably thought she had a good reason at the time. Take it on faith Dynamite, she probaly thought she had a good reason. Thank You. Ronnie W.

terrorist in 9/11 wasn't black or the ones in olka.city.so what with your stories or with you.you have a problem with people of color.the japanese killed many americans and arabs and you kiss their ass.black go to war for this country and this is what they get, a lot of racist b/s.

It isn't racism. Many criminal gangs in modern society are ethnically based - be they Afro-Americans, Mexicans, Asians or red-necked WASPs. People are like that sometimes - bond best with those who are like them. To write about Afro-American criminal gangs in today's society that is full of "black gangsta" hip-hop imagery is not racism, its picking up on a theme most people will be able to identify.

I like this one so far, though it could use some serious editing for grammar and punctuation. Looking forward to seeing how it plays out from here.

Give Eagle a break. It was a good story so why all the negatives. Maby a few questions were left unanswered so what? It still leaves Eagle a chance to finish it with a good conclusion that would answer all these questions. How about it eagle up to finishing it for us??

Dale

I didn't find any part hard to read. And you could write another chapter maybe but it isn't necessary.

With their freedom and his new millions I am sure they're going to make it.

This story can be the basis for a story from Terry's POV.

SleeplessinMD

There is a difference between desciption and demonization. You are proably unaware of the difference.

Good story about the very real danger the drugs and terrorism connection represents. Thanks.

how many black terrorist there have been in this country in the twenty five years.arabs and white folks have been doing the terrorizing.what i saying is when a white woman involve it always a black pimp,there white slavers and pimps.but forgive me we write about who we think is the bad guy or who we want to be the bad guy.the last two stories were about the blacks with white women been there target,which i couldn't see it.

To the several commentators that mentioned the race angle, reread the story, these people were CUBAN, members of a CUBAN crime gang...not black. Many gangs draw their members from their own ethnic background, something that's gone on for ages.

Though we don't have the prologue about his wife's enslavement, all we can do is look back at the history of organized crime to read about the various methods that have been used to recruit women (and men) for prostitution in the past for those details.

Now, on to the story. I happen to think that this is the best writing Grey Eagle's posted yet, well organized and tightly plotted. I do take a bit of exception to the husband being present at the police raid, unless I missed his being deputized, but since this appears to be an "in house" Indian Affairs police action, but for the story's purposes it might be excusable as taking care of a brother indian's problems.

All in all, this has been a very good read!

It is easy to see from Europe, that it isn't Racial!

We have Ukranian 'mafiosa', the classic italian, those from Corsica, the Russian gangs to name a few!

Realise, these associate and trust in 'kind' whan that is the farthest from them. Leave Eagle be with that crap, and the person who cried blacks against white women should reread the story and apologise!

Carry on Eagle, please

John

Would have been nice to know how this started. Also, no second-rate (or fist-rate)"gang" would risk the US Army getting involved for a piece of ass. And all of you getting on the previous poster's observation about the racial angle. Go to Hell. If you aren't a minority that was raised in the US, you have no idea what you're talking about. Of course, it has never stopped you in the past.

Lets read more of Terry will Terry and Chucky continue as a family and what about Marie will you continue with the story?The only time the US Army gets involved is because Antwan was selling stinger missiles and that is a military offense that needs to be handled.

Atlanta,Ga

to this page I hope he realizes what an idiot he is for not even realizing the gang was Cuban, not black and for thinking that only someone who's been a minority in USA can empathize with the situation.Try being white in Zimbabwe fool!Pistolpackinpete

You did leave several lead-in questions unanswered. It is fairly usual to leave trailing questions unanswered, especially if you plan follow on stories or sequels. You could fix that with a prequel...

<P>

<I>-- srgeek --</I>

Sorry, but while the story wasn't bad the amount of unanswered questions took alot away for me. How did she get involved, obviously she wasn't at home playing happy homemaker and a criminal gang just walked in the door. What kind of fool would take her back with these questions unanswered. Her actions in getting involved with these people put both his and her families in danger. Did she get into drugs leading to prostitution and get picked up by a bad pimp? What makes a 2 dollar whore worth all the efforts put into survailance etc? Sure she regrets the bad decisions she made and wants to come home but the way you left the story she isn't worth taking back, unless you want to prostitute her yourself. At least her friend has some defense, she was sold at 10 years old, when she was to young to defend herself.

drivel, the fact you took time to write this saddens me

It saddens me you had to show your ignorance by writing such a trivial and mindless review. Please stick to the comic strips they are more your speed. Sorry Grey just couldn't let that sort of diarea go unanswered

It ties into your other characters from other stories. I got that the reason Terry became one of their slave whores was because she had changed into a beauty and they grabbed her up for that reason. They threatened her family and killed their pet. They also messed with the brakes on the Mother's vehicle. So white slavery for sexual purposes was why Terry was with them. I thought this story was well written. Sure it could have been better but then isn't that the case with most of them. StangStars's stories could always be better too if he wasn't putting them out so fast. Isn't that why DQS chose to leave and pursue completing novels about his characters.

Not all that realistic in places, but it is a work of fiction after all. Some of your critics take themselves too seriously.

Ain't it against the Excited States "Posse Commy Taters" laws for the military to come down on common scumbags? I mean, such actions would have the shysters going into raving hysterics!

But exactly the sort of thing that should happen to organised crime.

If only the powers that be stopped accepting funding from scumbags and got their heads out of their asses then society could be cleaned up.

Got a little flat at the end. Thanks for sharing.

There is too much missing from this.

How did she get involved?

If she was a normal wife was she just snatched off the street?

Just picked at random?

What was she doing?

An ordinary whore is not worth the surveillance gear in an empty house, much less that many people actively watching her.

That many people following her husband?

If they know or even suspect he is that dangerous why would they make an enemy of him?

This writer has not been here in a long time, but maybe others can learn from his mistakes.

Posse Comitatus has lot's of room for feds to do what locals need them to de - whether he likes that or not.o now a days.

Activate Homeland security concerns and most bets are off

-

The story was good for what was there - but would have been much better with what was missing - how did she get into trouble? Did she go looking for fun in the wrong places and get in over her head? Did she get conned by someone she trusted? What did she do to make the asshat want her enough to threaten people with death?

I still liked it and outcome though - he now has his wife back and owns Mari

Really enjoyed this story though as i have noticed with many of your stories you seem to end them a bit too soon so it was great having the murphy's come together in this one and help tie up a few loose ends.

Antwhan Escobar

First name is Ebonics for Antoine (which is French).

Last name is Hispanic.

If he was Cuban (Hispanic) his first name would be Antonio.

This is like reading Chapter 12 of a 24 Chapter book. Far too much prior information missing. Readers are expected to fill in the gaping holes. Needs a helluva lot of work.

This has the potential to be a grwat story; however, I believe you should consider expanding on the plot as it rather trunkated. Also the story ends too soon.

As it stands, the story is disjointed and half the time sounds like it's in code! Not well written.

Why would he take her back? Why do these people in these stories get so fixated on to one person when that person treats them like shit?

Further chapter or chapters please.

Not bad. Being retired military, I do understand the abbreviated or truncated language. Still, it could use more information. Possibly Chapter-2 in a background filler role, expanding and explaining in better detail what transpired leading up to the final shots fired. It would be nice, along with closing many open holes.

What a returning wounded vet story. What imagination and a daring operation. Kudos to author.