All Comments on 'Rekindling the Flame'

The story while well written lack charcter developement and names.

The spelling lacked editing also....Good luck with the next one.

It allowed me to imagine it was my brother and me. He's teased, groped and flirted with me, but we've haven't gone all the way yet. Maybe I should print this and leave it on my desk. He's always snooping around my computer.

I think you did a very good job with developing the tension between the characters and not building to a peak too soon. However, the grammar, spelling, etc. need some work. Some examples:

"Two people old enough to want it but too young to really know any better." This is not a sentence; it is a fragment.

". . . catching up on who were doing what . . ." Was, not were.

"Lost for words, I leaned in and flicked the tip of tone across the smooth round head of his cock." I assume you meant "my tongue" instead of "tone."

With corrections to the technical aspects, it would have been a 5 star story. You definitely have good potential. Find a different editor. Use spell check. Use a grammar checker. Keep writing.

In a short space you developed the characters, made their feelings for each other seem natural and believable. The sex was erotic and exciting without being over the top and repetitive. While some may prefer more explicit detail, I for one enjoyed it because it focused on more of the feelings she was having instead of the dimensions of things.

Good work, look forward to more

I liked the story despite the eccentric sentence construction that I assume must have been even worse before it was "edited." There is something almost realistic about the situation before he harshly wants to shove her mouth downward. The story idea is great!

I enjoyed the way you wrote the sex scenes.

My favorite line of the whole story;

"...following what felt natural in this unnatural union."

Very well crafted

I was captivated... this was written so well, that I felt that I was there. I felt the nervous energy, and was drawn as if a gravitational force had come over me.

if this is the edited version i would hate to see the original. USE A BETTER EDITOR AND REPORT THE ONE YOU USED TO THE WEBMASTERS SO THEY CAN REMOVE THEM FROM THE LIST.

not enough 10" dicks and 44 ddd tits for you?, could it have been edited more carefuly? possibly..... it's a story about passion. keep writing

This was a great little story. Cute, fun and easy. The commenter "not good" is a moron of the highest order. You'll notice his comments popping up around this site here and there. But I tell you what author, it's awesome to view this idiots comments when you're feeling down. It's always a really good laugh! I mean, this fag thanks authors for the FREE entertainment they provide by issuing such statements as: "if this is the edited version i would hate to see the original. USE A BETTER EDITOR AND REPORT THE ONE YOU USED TO THE WEBMASTERS SO THEY CAN REMOVE THEM FROM THE LIST."

Fortunately, you're not the only author this wanker attacks, so we can all get a laugh from reading his comments on other posts too! Can't wait to find more of this softcock's leavings and have another laugh.

Loved it. Good job.

Very hot