Sand Castle Sandy

He looked at me so expectantly, like maybe I had turned to stone or something, but it was definitely full of deep concern.

"I fought it," I admitted, finally out loud. "I fought it hard. I told myself I couldn't have you and yet I've wanted you since the day I met you. I told myself not to fall in love because I was too broken, but all you did was work yourself deeper into my heart and put it all back together again. I want you too. I need you too. I love you too."

He stopped my lip from trembling with a deep kiss, backed up with emotion that was magnificent. Our tongues met and he tasted delicious, they entwined and explored each other for the very first time.

He broke the kiss and looked at me, his expression pained. I knew why. Then he laughed as he could read the pain I was feeling myself. We had worked our bodies into such awkward positions, I had such a kink in my back that I thought I might not ever get up again.

He groaned while he unwrapped himself, freeing me up a little to stretch, and that's when I saw it. It was her eyes. She approved. Surely it was my crazy imagination, but I detected a little smile, something I don't remember carving.

Rick said soberly, "Yeah. I see it too. You did a good job on her."

*

We alternately kissed soft and hard, making out in the RV until my lips were sore. As darkness overtook the coast, we didn't bother turning on the camping lantern, his hands were assured of where I was at all times. All of me. The moon illuminating the drawn curtains behind him giving the appearance of a halo.

He sat up against the pillowed bed's headboard and put my pillow in his lap. With an invite I gladly approved of, he positioned me until my head was comfortably laid on the pillow and he gently removed the hair tie from my ponytail where he began to stroke my hair with his fingers, taking care to untangle it first. He'd start at my hairline with his nails gently scraping my scalp before running his fingers through the rest of my hair. Repeat. With that and the leftover feeling of my now tender lips and his incredible hands over my most sensitive body parts, I had never been so relaxed.

In a soft, tractable tone that seemed to make waves in the darkness, while never pausing the ministration of my hair, he spoke. "When I got back from the restroom, and you were gone. I got a queasy feeling. I waited for an hour, and with every minute, my worry compounded. I went looking for you almost in panic. While I was looking in vain, I thought, what if I couldn't find you. What if something bad happened to you or that you left me for good. Either scenario, it was killing me. I knew it was all my fault. I had almost lost control in the passageway and thought I ruined everything."

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"There's nothing for you to apologize for," he reassured me. His fingers, working magic in my hair and on my scalp.

He took a deep breath, "When Vickie got sick, she tried to hide it from me. I'm still angry at her for that, but I understand why she did it. Still, it was no excuse. She tried to protect me while I should have been protecting her. Doing whatever I could to help her ease the pain. There was so much pain." I felt him shudder before he continued. "Then what happened today, I realize that you and I are no better. We hid our feelings from each other. I promise never to do that again. I will be open and honest to you from now on, good or bad or otherwise. OK?"

"Thank you," I whispered.

"Now I ask that you to promise me the same. I want you to talk to me about anything and everything. Open and honest. Will you promise me?" His hands massaged my scalp a little harder in emphasis, sending a wave of tingle through my body from head to toe.

"I promise," I whispered in reply. I asked myself if I thought I could keep that promise and responded back to myself that I would. I was going to put my promise into practice that very moment.

I had been absent mindedly holding a hand on his thigh, just under the pillow my head was on. "I love you," I said with feeling. He replied in kind, and I smiled in the darkness, moving my hand further under the pillow until it reached the cuffs of his oversized board shorts.

No longer caring whether he noticed what I intended to do or not, I easily entered his shorts and my hand found what it was looking for. He let out a light gasp and slightly opened his legs, allowing my fingers and palm to encompass his penis. As he rubbed, massaged, and tugged on my scalp and hair, I gently pulsed, pulled, and rolled his sex. As it grew in size, I couldn't help but notice my own arousal.

I lifted my head slightly off the pillow which paused his stroking of my hair but gave me just enough room for some stroking of my own. I was pleased when I detected him groan.

"Rick," I asked, "do you think we could find something to do with what's in the glove box?"

"Are you sure?" He asked back.

"We promised to be honest and open, right?" My stroking grew in length along with his erection.

He groaned, "Yesss."

I smiled in the dark, "Then yes, I'm sure. Now be honest and open with me. Do you want me right now?"

"Oh, yes. Please."

I whispered, "Why don't you go get one that will work for you."

I let go of his penis and sat up in bed, he scooted off and moved quickly towards the front of the cabin, the whole RV rocking back and forth, squealing and moving with its own excitement. I scooted back down and removed my shorts, bikini top and bottoms.

In the little light through the moonlit curtain, I saw that he slapped a large fistful of condoms on the built in nightstand, several spilling over onto the floor from the pile. I giggled, "Oh, you're confident."

He chuckled back, "I was just teasing."

With some seriousness, I warned him. "You might only need just one. My ex told me that I was a terrible lay."

"There's no such thing as that. Sex is like pizza. Even when it's bad, it's still kind of good."

I laughed, "Really, you're going to drop something like that before making love to me for the very first time?"

He laughed back, "Sorry. Stupid thing to say. All the blood has rushed to my other head."

By that point, he had lost his shirt and shorts and with the condom applied, he moved over me. He was careful not to squish me but enough pressure that I could feel electricity over the full contact of where our skin met.

I opened my legs further and he lined up his sex to mine... and missed. Then he missed the target again. He lowered his hand to guide his penis, first arcing it up and down between my lips, even through the condom he had to have felt how aroused I was. Then finally moved forward. And missed my opening yet again.

I giggled at him through my heavy breathing and reached down and guided him right to my entrance. He didn't waste a second before gently driving forward, determined to enter and stay coupled. We simultaneously let out an, "Ahhhh."

When he bottomed out, he kissed me and asked if I was OK. I responded breathily, "I'm so OK."

Having my ultimate permission, he started rising up and down. The friction brought out an immediate response from my entire internal chemistry set, sending pulses of pleasurable energy throughout my extremities. He found a rhythm and I rose up to meet it best I could. He occasionally kissed me until he lowered his head further, passing my mouth and cheek, his lips and tongue finding my earlobe. That sent renewed tingles from head to toe. He paused just long enough to say, "I love you."

I tried to say that I loved him back, I really did. Something escaped my lips and it was an unintelligible sort of neanderthal moan or groan, I don't know. Only I had been so on edge and feeling so much electricity running through my core that when I heard him say the words, it triggered something that started a chain reaction, doubling my anticipation with every stroke. His lips closed on my earlobe again and... and... boom. I convulsed in my climax and the spasms he felt below him from me were of enough intensity that I think it became his own trigger, and I heard him groan. His undulating wavelength shortened as I felt the final pulses of him inside me, filling the condom.

*

Later that night and for many nights to come, he focused an artistry of his hands, mouth, and his sex into a bottomless pleasuring of every square inch of my body, taking unhurried time at my more sensitive bits. It was like he had been taking notes while documenting where every spot on my body map mattered the most. God, he was good at it and every single wall that I still had up totally evaporated.

He also deliberately changed my outlook on being a morning person, there was something about the way he would make love to me after we first woke. No matter my appearance in bed at first light, he looked at me like I was the most beautiful woman in the world, like I was his queen. What? Wait. Yes. Like I was his queen.

Looking back, I enjoyed sex from before I was even married or even knew my ex. When it was new, like when I was in college and explored it for the first time, I embraced the fun and pleasure, even when it was awkward. I even seasoned it boldly but on my own terms. Somehow, my ex had spoiled the memory of that, he wanted me to say things and do things that I didn't want to do and that was the wedge that festered and then corrupted the whole experience. Rick had brought back the fantastic in it all, only with more tingly feel-good emotion that I had ever experienced and not once did he ever ask me to do something that crossed over into weird or gross.

Our intimate moments were a key ingredient but not the only one. I felt electricity in his every touch, we held hands when exploring town, he'd give me random kisses, he teased me with mirth and allowed me to tease back, stroked my hair, massaged anything I felt sore, and I was growing more and more attached to Rick to the point I was a little scared. Make that very scared.

We floated into Pismo with a belch through the exhaust at the worst moment, at the gate of the RV park we were going to park in, a half mile away from the competition. Rick had to stuff an open hand of a few hundred dollars to bypass a vehicle age requirement that was newly instituted to keep junky RVs like mine out of the park. We parked in between two expensive and shiny busses full of pop outs, swarmed with surely entitled Gen Z or so young people, frolicking under awnings with deck furniture looking like 5-star resorts.

We didn't care. At least this park's bathrooms had semi-private showers and nearly-hot water.

We had cooked some hot dogs on my camp barbecue and were sitting in our folding chairs watching the mayhem of the partiers in the RV park when something came over us. Our flirting with each other got out of hand and looking into each other's eyes, we knew we had gotten frisky and a nooner was mutually wanted and was going to happen. Without even saying it out loud, we moved at the same time and he followed me into the RV with a healthy grab of my ass for good measure.

Rick totally improvised and after devouring my neck (hopefully not leaving any marks) with his mouth while his fingers detailed my nipples, I found myself leaning against the side of the bed, my feet braced against the corner of the RV wall in the small space. Rick was between my legs which were spread wide before him. His tongue was between the lips of my wet mouth when he penetrated my equally wet lips below with his erection.

With my encouragement, his movements increased in frenzy into a very satisfying pounding. I groaned and moaned, not typical of me during intercourse, but just couldn't be helped due to his deliverance. He vocalized the same.

Something caught my eyes which had been mostly closed. For years I had this silly decoration hanging from the ceiling in the corner, a plush stuffed parrot on a swing. It was swinging wildly. With my audible expression of pleasure on pause at the sight, I could hear the groaning of the RV and the whole cabin was oscillating in a wild rocking motion, side to side.

At first, I was going to slow Rick down. Calm things down. Fuck that. No way. I bucked back and urged him on even more. He reached between the gap and magically massaged my clitoris. He yelped in his orgasm. I followed it and vocalized it just the same with my own, only just a couple of heartbeats after his.

We caught our breaths, then kissed some more in between looking into each other's eyes with a dreamy gaze. What we had just done was really incredible and we let each other know it in whispers.

When we emerged from the RV to retake our lounging outside, there was an outpouring of applause from our young neighbors. The guys mobbed Rick with high fives, one put a beer into his hand. I turned red and giggled, but let him know not to worry, that it would be OK and he should enjoy the beer. The girlfriends of these guys then surrounded me, put a beer in my own hand and pulled me away from the men, wanting details as if we were besties, and I didn't even know their names.

Keeping one eye on Rick from a distance, by the time he had finished his beer I could tell he had rock-star status with his new friends. He asked them something I couldn't hear and then he went off and into our RV, re-emerging with a bath towel and a razor. He walked by my new sorority and said to me, "I'm going to take a hot shower in the bus and I'm even going to shave. You can either join me or take one after me, your choice."

The girls squealed after he walked away and encouraged me to join him. My embarrassment meter was already redlined so I just finished my beer with the women and took my turn after Rick.

I didn't realize that singular event was about to change everything.

We actually hung out with our neighbors for the rest of the afternoon and we contributed to a joint barbecue when it got dark, the youngsters proceeding to get drunk as skunks, while Rick and I just held on to each other and watched the antics. When the couples started slinking off to get their own friskies on, we moved our chairs to watch the sun set in private.

"We have to talk." He said while looking towards the Pacific.

I sighed. After Pismo, we'd be on our last three weeks together before going back to our previously scheduled lives. "I know," I responded.

"About a couple things. I'm worried we're going to get into our first fight." He looked at me expectantly.

I looked over at him. What had I done, I wondered.

He looked over at me and got serious, "Stop it. I love you and that isn't going to change." He scooted his chair right next to mine and took my hand. "When I asked the boys to use their shower in the bus, it was pretty selfish of me but you have to admit, it felt good."

I nodded my head, thinking I knew where he was going to take this. I stiffened at it.

He went on, "Spending these seven weeks with you like this has been awesome. I want to say I enjoyed every minute of it, only there've been moments that make me wonder how you do it all. Starting with having to use the public beach-side bathrooms. When I walk out with you at night to keep an eye out while you go potty, I can't believe you did this alone all those years. I worry about the weirdos that hang out around here at night. Shit, the day even. And then showering in those cold public beach showers?! How do you do that for 10 straight weeks? It's OK for the most part, I never thought of myself as a prima donna, feeling for a pea under the mattress, but... shit."

"Here," he took my hand and led me into the RV. He brought me to the bed and I thought it was weird, his mood was not of the frisky kind at that moment. "We made love outside of the bed earlier. This is why, mostly." He pulled the bedsheets down and pointed to a pile of sand that had settled in the center of the bed. "There's sand everywhere, Sandy."

I found my voice, "What are you saying? Do you want to go home?"

He got a funny look at that, "Would you come home with me? If I asked you to be with me and leave the circuit, would you go?"

I nodded sheepishly. I wanted to finish what we started, but I would follow him over a cliff if he wanted to do that.

He smiled brightly, "Well, I would never ask you to do that, but what if... what if we stayed in a hotel two or three nights a week until the competitions are over, and each time I had the RV cleaned out while we ordered room service to our room and then we made love between clean sheets?"

The weight of that felt heavy instantly. "Nooo," I wailed, "that's way outside of my budget."

"It's on me," he tried to assure me. "I'll cover it and it will be great."

"I can't let you do that," I responded with enough emotion, hoping he understood.

"Yes, you can. Please let me."

"No, I can't."

"Yes, you can. I know what you're doing. You're punishing yourself. You embrace the discomfort because you think you deserve it. I'm telling you that you don't have to. We're together now."

I mumbled something like, "You don't know what you're talking about."

"OK, OK." He took both my hands and made me look into his eyes. "If you want to spend the next few weeks here in the RV as scheduled, I will stay by your side. Just this. You know my history. I lost my parents and inherited the business. I grew it, wanting my father to be proud of me but he wasn't there for validation so I just continued it in his memory."

I stopped him, "He would be proud of you. How could he not? He's looking down on you at this very moment gushing with pride, I just know it."

He pursed his lips and then let out a breath, "Yeah, OK, thanks. Let me continue." I nodded my head. "So, I'm not rich, but I'm not hurting for money either. With my inheritance, I would give it all up if I could have them back. So what fucking good is it? Let me get us a clean, comfortable room here and there. For us. Please."

I remember in old movies, what he was asking me to do would make me be what was called a 'kept woman' which was just stupid, I know, but it gave me a weird feeling. Like I would be taking advantage of him, like he'd be my 'sugar daddy' or something obscene like that.

I wanted to pull my own weight and not be a drag on him. If I was an anchor attached to his ankle, how long before he tired of me and left me behind?

Yet, if I made him live in squalor any much longer, I could see him leaving me for that too.

Then an overwhelming feeling of love came over me and I could see it in his face. He wanted this so badly.

And not just for himself, this man didn't have a selfish bone in his body. No. He wanted to do this for me too. I could see how important this was and if I rejected him, he would be crushed.

"Alright," I told him with a quick kiss, "If that will make you happy, then it will make me happy too."

I took the cordless car vac off the charger and sucked up all the sand off the sheets then peeled off my bottoms and invited him to me. He came to me with a victorious look, replaced with a hungry visage filled with lust and anticipation.

It was my imagination maybe, but I thought I heard him growl as he entered me.

*

A week later I was cutting into a steak in the hotel restaurant that was situated on pilings over the water, going through with Rick the thoughts I had on our castle we'd be carving here in Monterey. It was an incredible restaurant, with views of the bay filled with sea otters that were floating and frolicking in view of our table.

Only now my attention had moved on to Rick when I felt he wasn't paying attention anymore. He just looked at me and I knew what it was all about. I had been dreading this.

"In your mind, what do you think is next for you? What do you want to do when this comes to an end at Santa Cruz?" He asked solemnly.

I moved my steak around in circles through the garlic butter on my plate. I would have said, "I don't know," but it would have been a lie. I went with a grunt instead, effectively transferring it to his move again.