All Comments on 'Seducing My Roommate'

Even tho you did not "go all the way" this time, it was very erotic reading. It will be fun to read how you do end up "going all the way" with her and hopefully how you try to convince her that she also needs to be a Mommy, conscientiously or not, as if she does not understand how her ovulating cycles go, and you impregnate her without her fully realizing what has happened until it is too late.

I liked your build up and you've left us waiting for the next episode.

what a sweet, sexy story! i wish every woman could give her virginity to such a patient, sensitive guy.

First, you say she's 26. Then, when she says she hasn't kissed a guy in 6 years, you say 'you haven't kissed a guy since you were 18??"

Later you say she's 25, then say her great kissing is the result of 8 years of build up.

The most disappointing part was how you finally got her naked. You spend so much telling about groping, trying for feels, reaching into her bra. Then, out of nowhere, one night 'she was naked in my bed'. HUH?? How about a few lines about HOW you finally got her naked.

Nice job. This is very good for a first story, keep it up. If you want to avoid some of the complaints I've read, submit the next one to an editor, they can help and do this to make stories better, not change them. They will fix grammer, math, and spelling, while coaching you on technique. Your character development and story flow are pretty good, so this should be minor. Have fun with your next one.

Well, it's not up to the USA Trilogy but it's all right.

C'mon now, show some imagination! I mean, how about JohnTresPassos? That shows that you're somewhat familiar with the guy, while also making it into a joke.

As for me, I'm amused to write the first comment in 17 years, which I'm pretty sure will never be read.