by Izzra
I wish i could say i hadn't been there before, but....we all have. Good story so far. Looking forward to the next chapter. thanks.
Do yourself a favor, get an editor, take pride in your work, so many errors that detract from the story. This is one example- "He was clam and in control". He was clam? There are missing words, letters missing from words, poor punctuation and grammar. You use 'don't' instead of 'didn't' every time, also 'wont' has an apostrophe, 'won't'. It could be so much better with editing! You said after the first chapter it was going to be better edited, I've yet to see it.
She clearly stated that English is not her first language and that she may make mistakes every now and then. It has nothing to do with having "pride in her work." If you find something wrong, tell her exactly what it is instead of being whiny assholes. Also, you can stop reading this FREE story she is providing for you.
Izzra - keep up the good work!
Don't worry about the perfectionists. I'm sure they would make a few mistakes too. It's a part of being human. Great story can't wait to read the rest. Keep it up!