Shady Pines Ch. 10: Graduation

A note: just a reminder from the last chapter - this is set at least 10 years ago.

I would love comments - I really want to improve my writing but need feedback to be able to tell what is/isn't working. Thanks for reading and please rate if you enjoy it.

*****

After the Christmas break, Sean and Logan hung out a few more times, aided by Al. She had attempted to get Sean's mom to let him go to the city, citing shopping, but his mother had claimed Sean's need for minimalism to prevent that. She felt as though she had a good hold of him in Greenholt, with her restrictive rules and spy network, and didn't want to lose that. She was painfully aware that the loving dynamic between her and Sean had changed. He was polite but distant, more like a lodger than a son.

In that time, Alexie noticed that Sean was generally quite detached. He stopped talking about Jake when he hung out with her and Sam. She hated the sadness in his eyes, that seemed to be becoming a permanent feature. The most he admitted to Al was that it might be too late, Jake had probably moved on.

Nevertheless, Al stepped up her search for Jake online, clicking on page after page of tiny thumbnails looking for piercing green eyes and tattoos. Nothing looked promising, bar an archive newspaper article from more than six years ago, showing a smiling fifteen-year-old with messy black hair, a cheeky smile and bright green eyes, proudly clasping a gold medal for winning a state cross-country championship, his skinny body clad in a running vest and shorts. There was little doubt that this was the right person, but it gave little new information, only the high school he'd attended. But as she knew he didn't live at home she'd put that on the backburner - she wasn't going to raise Sean's hopes until she could work out where to go with it.

Exams approached and suddenly everyone was reclusive - all needing to do their best in this final semester. Sean had applied for several top law schools, and accepted a provisional scholarship from NYU, so it was even more important for him to do well. He had told his mother he was re-thinking his career and would take a year off, in order to throw her off. She was unhappy, but he refused to engage and claimed exams as a reason to spend as much time as possible out of the house; studying in the library or working out in the gym.

There was one last party to look forward to - the Delta Upsilon Kappa end of year blowout. Alexie was planning on surprising her best friends with a new tattoo that represented them. She'd settled on a hyper-realistic image of a peapod with three peas - because the three of them were as 'alike as three peas in a pod'. She felt like it held the right amount of cute for her personality, whilst holding a huge meaning to one of the most important relationships in her life.

However, she wasn't easy to please and was struggling to find someone she trusted enough to permanently ink her. Hanging out with Bridget one day, she was scrolling through images.

"Check this out," Bridget passed over her laptop, which was open to a Facebook page called 'Phoenix Rising', "He's based in the city, and his work is amazing." Alexie scrolled through the images. They were just what she was looking for.

Alexie found the website for the tattoo parlor - North Star Tattoos. More examples of amazing artwork, from the guy who called himself 'Phoenix Rising' and from the other artists at the parlor. As she scrolled through the older pictures she gasped when she saw a beautiful colored ink of a hummingbird on a broad toned chest, its wings spread behind it. It looked as though it were moving, it was so finely drawn. But that wasn't what had shocked her.

"What's up?" Bridg asked.

"You know Sean's guy, Jake?"

"Yeah, of course. He's a tattoo artist isn't he?" Bridg was beginning to understand.

"I think this could be him," Al pointed at the picture, "I can't be sure, but it looks exactly like Sean described. Maybe this place did his tat."

"His can't be the only hummingbird tattoo though..." Bridg put a note of caution in. Al nodded, but she wasn't disheartened. It was the best lead she'd had.

****

Alexie was nervous as she sat in the waiting area, next to a shaven headed man. The friendly receptionist, her arms covered in intricately painted sleeves, had clocked her as a newbie straight away and tried to put her at ease.

"Who are you seeing?" she asked, chirpily.

"Oh...I don't know actually," she hadn't even thought to get a name, only interested in getting a booking, which she'd only managed to do because of a last-minute cancellation.

The girl clicked away at the computer, checking the bookings.

"Okay, I've got you," the girl bobbed out of her seat and into the back room.

"Your next appointment's here," Al heard her announce. She heard a deep voice respond.

"Thanks Leila, I'll be five more minutes finishing up."

A few minutes later a tall young man, with a sterile dressing wrapped around his forearm, exited the back room. He went to Leila to pay, and he was followed out by a man with glossy black hair. Al almost gasped out loud. It was him. No mistaking. There was the hair, and then the luminous green eyes and several tattoos up his bare arms that Sean had described in detail. She could even see the head of the hummingbird at the 'v' of his tank. He whispered something to Leila and span on his heel, moving with the easy grace of a dancer, that Sean had described, and Al had previously put down to puppy-love vision.

Leila took the man's payment, and then approached Al.

"Okay, Alex, Jake will be ready for you now, follow me," she twittered happily. They went into the back room, where a couple of artists were working, their clients on comfortable leather reclining chairs, and Jake was laying out clean materials. He turned and looked slightly shocked.

"Oh...hi. Sorry... I thought you were a guy. You must be Alex," he reached out a hand.

"I get that sometimes," Alexie laughed and shook his hand, trying to act cool. How was she going to proceed? They chatted for a while about her requirements and he started work just above her hip.

"I really like the bird on your arm," Al pointed at his bicep when hers was nearly complete, "is it a swallow?" Jake nodded, "Do you have any other birds?" He stood, stripping off his white vest and pointed casually over his shoulder at the crimson cardinal, and then the hummingbird. Al sucked in air. Hot.

"They're amazing," Alexie breathed, "did you do them yourself?" Jake snorted.

"I'm not that supple, my boss did those ones," he laughed. He pointed to a realistic black-lined rose on his inner forearm, "I did that one though." He then pointed at a delicate green sprig of rosemary attached to the hummingbird's leg with a yellow ribbon, and his face dropped "And that." He pulled his shirt back on.

"Do they have meaning?" Alexie asked softly.

"Yes," Jake responded shortly, before physically shaking his funk off. "Anyway, does yours, Alex?" he asked, while finishing up his application of gently graded color. Al took a breath.

"Yes, it does. And you can call me Al; my friends do," Jake looked up sharply, as if seeing her for the first time. The flashing eyes, the button nose, and auburn-red hair currently restrained by a barrette.

"Al... so what does it mean?" he asked pensively, watching her with wide eyes.

"It represents me and my two best friends. We're about to finish college and we'll all be going our separate ways. Sam's going to Europe to work in his uncle's business," Jake's eyes got even wider and he was perfectly still.

"And...?" he prompted.

"Sean's going to NYU," Jake blinked rapidly.

"Did you know?" he whispered.

"Only when I saw you here," she whispered back.

"Does Sean know?" Al shook her head. They were speaking in code but they both understood perfectly.

"Will you come with me?" Al asked. Just then Jake's boss, a giant of a man with long black hair tied into a smooth ponytail, came in from the front.

"Jake, are you almost ready for your next client? He's waiting out front," Jake turned to him, a slightly panicked look in his eye. "What's the matter?"

"Sean..." The man glanced at Al, confused.

"Hi, I'm Al," she held out her hand, "Sean's best friend," the man shook her hand in his surprisingly gentle paw, comprehension dawning.

"Okay, you have to go, I guess, Jake," he patted Jake's shoulder in a fatherly manner, "I'll get your next guy, it's only a touch up."

"Thanks, Rich," Jake was in a daze, and shrugged on a grey cord jacket, grabbing keys, phone and wallet off a shelf and shoving them in his jean pockets as he followed Al out to her car after she'd dropped cash onto Leila's counter. She felt like there was no time to waste.

They'd begun their journey in silence.

"Does he want to see me?" Jake asked eventually, a point he'd clearly been pondering for a while. Al laughed in response, a loud and genuine sound.

"Er, yeah," Al said when she'd recovered, "definitely. You have to understand that he's been on house arrest since you saw him. His mother watches him, and gets other people to watch him, and hasn't let him go further than five miles away from his house. If he'd been able to, he'd have been straight to the city to search for you, as crazy as that would have been..." she glanced at Jake's face, which was staring ahead through the windscreen, trying to maintain composure.

"I did message him," Jake said, quietly.

"He knows. He never got to read it. His mom took control of his internet use as well." If nothing else, there was no doubt in Al's mind; from the way Jake had reacted to finding out who she was, to the uncertainty he was showing now, that Sean's concern about it being 'too late' was unfounded.

"Are you wondering why he didn't just leave?" Al asked gently. Jake just shrugged, still refusing to look at her, but she could see the glisten of unshed tears.

"His mother threatened him. Said she'd stop him from being accepted to do law. He's wanted it since he was a kid. Wants to specialize in human rights," Al smiled at the memory of him fighting for student rights in elementary, and then pulled herself to now. "She scared him," Al finished simply.

Jake let the tears fall now. It broke his heart that Sean had been through that from someone who was supposed to love him unconditionally, for something he had no power over.

Jake recovered his usual stoic exterior quickly.

"Sorry, it's just, you know..."

"No need to apologize. Remember Sean is my best friend. Demonstrations of kind and caring behavior don't faze me." She winked as he glanced at her, and he grinned.

"Well, if I'm being honest, they do faze me a bit. Cowardly refusal to talk about feelings is more my speed."

"I appreciate the honesty," she was serious for a moment, "might explain some stuff actually." Jake raised a questioning eyebrow. "Sean and I have always talked about everything. No filter. I've known this whole time he was holding back about you. I've put it down to it hurting too much to be reminded, but it makes more sense that he was protecting himself in case..." she used Sean's words, "in case you'd moved on." Jake laughed mirthlessly.

"No much chance of that happening..." he paused, as if wondering how much to open up. "When we first got back, I'd drive over every day off I had. Rich convinced me that was the way madness lay. I trust him on most things. But I think he was wrong on that one." Al was silent, not wanting to spook him.

"I rang the college asking for his timetable. Obviously, that didn't work. Dumb. But I was desperate. When I checked the graduating class names that they publish and saw he wasn't on the list, I figured he'd moved away, maybe gone to a different college. I thought I'd missed my chance. That's when I got the rosemary," he traced the tattoo through his tee. "And then I saw you. I thought I was dreaming."

"His courses... he was doing extra credit stuff, so the classes ran late. That's why he's not on the list, because they published it before his grades were finalized. Actually, he's valedictorian." Jake whistled, impressed.

"Must make his mom happy I guess?" he asked.

"Don't know really. He doesn't talk to her. I assume she knows, but I doubt it's because he told her. He's distancing himself from her because he's going to leave as soon as graduation is done and he isn't telling her where he's going. He's sick of how much she's interfered in his life."

Shortly after, they pulled up outside Al's home, a large white Victorian-style two-story in a tree-lined street. As they entered the house, Al explained that there was a celebration party happening tonight, and she really wanted to surprise Sean. Jake wasn't as certain that was a good idea, but Al's enthusiasm was infectious.

Al led Jake to the large kitchen at the back of the house, filled with the bright light of the afternoon sun. A tall woman, strawberry blonde hair artlessly arranged on the top of her head and wearing a full-length diaphanous dress, span from the counter where she had been chopping vegetables.

"Darling," she trilled in a sing-song voice, "how wonderful you're home." She hugged Al to herself, planting a kiss on her cheek. She caught sight of Jake. "And who is your young friend?"

She let go of Al and pulled Jake into an equally warm hug.

"How wonderful to meet a friend of Alexie's," she gushed.

"Um, mom, this is Jake," Al began. Her mom pulled back, holding his upper arms as she looked searchingly at his face.

"The Jake?" she questioned, her voice sounding a lot more shrewd. Then she reverted, "How utterly wonderful. Sean must be ecstatic."

"Yes, mom," Al sighed, "but Sean doesn't know yet, we're going to surprise him."

"Ooh, I'll bet you will. So you'll be taking him to this party? And will you be wearing this?" she gesticulated at Jake's clothes.

"Umm, I guess so. I didn't stop to bring anything," Jake blushed.

"No way," suddenly she was all business again, "you can borrow something from Van, he left things behind when he went to school."

"Oh, by the way, mom, Sean's staying with us until graduation, okay?"

"Of course, wonderful!" Then she looked incisively at Jake, "His mother lost her mind when she married that pompous ass. I just hope she can find it again before she loses her son completely. What a stupid thing to lose such a wonderful child over."

Al and Jake went upstairs to get changed.

"So... your mom seems cool..."

"Aha, she's terrifying, isn't she? I swear I've never been able to lie to her. She disarms you with the ditzy hippy act and then homes in on the truth without fail. Luckily, the hippy isn't just an act. My parents are very chilled out."

"So, your dad's like that too?" Jake tried to imagine.

"Not quite as bad," Al laughed, "he's relaxed but no pushover. Not even pretend. They own a really successful health food wholesale business. It's actually because of me and my brother that they're the way they are. My dad was in a slightly more...ahem...traditional import export business when he was young and got mixed up with some pretty bad people. My mom saved him in a literal life-or-death situation, but someone else - our birth mother - died. Mom had promised her that she'd look after us. So she did. It taught them to live in the moment and not let anything get them down." Al finished abruptly. Jake's mouth was agape.

"Anyway, I'll fill you in sometime, but right now we have more current news to think about," Al bustled Jake into a bedroom that was all navy blue walls and brown wood furniture. "My brother's room. He left loads of clothes so let's get you kitted out."

Alexie pulled out several items from the still-full wardrobe. Van was over six feet tall and not as broad as Jake across the shoulders, so they decided on a simple slim-fit black tee instead of a shirt. Luckily Van and Jake's narrow hips were a match so Jake had no trouble selecting a pair of charcoal gray twill trousers which were only little too long, but they looked pretty good with his, luckily not too scuffed, black Vans. He showered and got dressed while Al sorted herself out.

Jake was just rubbing some hair putty he'd found in the bathroom through his unruly black locks when Al knocked and came in. He let out a low whistle.

"Thanks," Al chirped, giving him a spin in her tiny tweed shorts and matching tight waistcoat. She had the kind of redhead complexion that was clear and glowing - little need for extensive makeup, particularly with the slight pleased-blush she'd garnered after Jake's reaction.

"C'mon, we'd better get going or I'll be late to get the boys."

*****

While Al and Jake had been driving in from the city Logan had been running around doing last minute party prep. While he was pleased with himself for choosing to grow up a little, and he'd had a good senior year at college, he wasn't going to miss acting as 'mom' to a house full of boys. He rolled his eyes as he balled up an empty chip packet that had already been demolished, just as his phoned buzzed. He extricated it from his tight jeans and saw it was Billy.

"Hey Loges, how's it going?"

"Great," Logan grinned into the phone, "it's great to hear from you, Billy."

"Glad to hear that," Logan could hear the smile in Billy's voice, "are you busy?"

"We're having an end of year party. But you know I've always got time to talk to you," Logan said warmly. To his disappointment, the phone cut out. He went to the front door, hoping for a better signal.

As he opened the door, a black car pulled up. Billy slid gracefully out of the driver's seat, leaning on the roof and grinning over at Logan. Logan didn't hesitate, running down the porch steps and launching himself into Billy's waiting arms. He pulled Billy's head in for an excited kiss, pressing his lips hard as he hugged his neck. When they finally separated, Billy laughed.

"Well, I was hoping you'd be happy to see me, but that's next level." Logan gave him a whack on his upper arm.

"Where have you been?...Well I know where, but why... why did you stay away so long? I've missed you. So much."

"Come inside. I want to talk to you."

They went inside and straight upstairs. Logan was a little worried about what Billy wanted to talk about and figured privacy would be a good idea. When they got to Logan's room, Billy planted him on the bed and paced the room in front of him.

"Right," Billy began, "I have something to say, and you need to let me say it. No interrupting." He took a deep breath and Logan nodded, agreeing to the terms.

"I stayed away for one reason. I'm in love with you," Logan's jaw dropped, "I realized at the camp when I felt your pain so deeply. But I felt so guilty that I knew I had to squash the feelings." Logan was looking at him wide-eyed, but sticking to his promise not to speak.

"When you left, I promised myself that I would leave you alone. Not mess your life up any more than I already had. And I was happy for you to hear how well you were doing. But I wasn't happy in myself at all. I wanted to be with you as you changed and developed. And it was selfish and stupid, so I stayed away." Billy bit his lip as he looked into Logan's eyes.

"I tried to deny the feelings. And I know you might be horrified to learn this. I know you were happy to see me, but I know too that this is more... more than that feeling. After everything I did..." Billy was beginning to stumble over his words, feeling the inadequacy of them. "Anyway, I said my bit, and I'll understand if you tell me I have to leave... I'll..."

"You idiot," Logan interrupted. Billy looked crestfallen and Logan quickly continued, "I'm in love with you as well. Always have been. Longer than you have, I guarantee." Billy was almost allowing himself to feel hope and he smiled.