All Comments on 'Shattered Innocence: Call me Cari'

This was great and I really hope you finish the story. I'd love to hear more about Amanda's and Cari's lives.

Some of the paragraphs are so contrived. "Let me tell you a little about myself..." "I guess I forgot to tell you about..." I know we're not writing great literature here but you must at least attempt to do justice to the craft of good storytelling and not sound like a budget Sweet Valley High novel. Sex scene and storyline are good...just tighten up the rest of it.