by HipsterZombie
Sorry, you lost me at the start. Changing POV is a killer of stories. Stick to writing 3rd person if you need to shift characters. That way reader does not confuse who is "I". Just my opinion.
I didn't think it would be that difficult to understand. Prologue = Ashita, Ch1 = Zaroi, Ch2 = Akita, Ch3 = Launa.
You have the start to a wonderful story here. i really hope you keep at it.
Due to some issues I've been having with my work being tampered with as i post it... I am moving my activity to other websites. I am disappointed with how things are conducted here, and at some point I will be taking down my work here as well but I'm too frustrated to deal with it at this moment.
I'm sad to go as this website has high traffic, more so than many other sites I will be posting on... but its not worth the hassle. You can find me on social media if you wish to follow my work further, as I will be sharing my updates there, and you can follow the links to the other websites I'll be working on. instead of clicking on each link separately, you can choose to go to my Linkree, which has a list of all the places i will be.
Linktree: https://linktr.ee/lee_brook_
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lee.brook.18
Instagram: www.instagram.com/lee_brook_/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Lee_Brook_
Tumblr: http://lee-brook.tumblr.com/
Fictionpress: https://www.fictionpress.com/u/1059776/
Wattpad: https://www.wattpad.com/user/Lee_Brook
Medium: https://medium.com/@leebrook_19219
Writer's Cafe: http://www.writerscafe.org/Lee_Brook/
This has been an exciting journey, and I've only just begun. Thank you for your patronage.