Sheldon Shags a Shoggoth

1

I had a strange series of dreams--strange by normal human standards at least, strange to me at the time--in the week before the Anomaly happened.

I'd wake up with the sensation of something heavy pressing down upon me, rub my eyes, and see the demon lying on top of me. That wasn't the weird part. Some nights it took the form of a bearded incubus; other nights a pert-breasted succubus with little fangs and a sleek tail; other nights, not woman or man, but an eldritch monster swimming with duplicate body parts and hybrid appendages. But that wasn't the weird part, either. I happen to be very queer and very into monster erotica.

What's odd was in these dreams I had a big, beautiful penis, and the demon lady (or man) would be riding it, and I could swear it was my very own flesh. (Oh, and they always offered me orange juice.) Back in high school I'd had plenty of dreams where I had a dick. But I'd found a lot of community since then, especially here in gay hippy Ithaca. I had gotten pretty comfortable with the fact my dick was a rainbow-colored 7 inch silicone dildo. I'd learned to manage the dysphoria around having a front hole. I'd come to terms with my oversized clit, which had always been visually neither here nor there; and my little round breasts just about passed for man-boobs now after years of T.

The night before the Anomaly, my sleep was deep and, to my memory, undisturbed. I'd chalked my dreams to a recent change in meds. It made sense they'd go away as I adjusted. Truth be told, there had also been a noticeable uptick in intrusive thoughts, but I was coping, and that night I was pleased with myself. I'd done everything I could to beef up my support system in the pandemic. Zoom calls with friends, my therapist once a week. And in a few days my BFF, Sid, was coming over, after an unfortunate delay due to covid exposure.

That day was an ordinary, quiet November day at the little farm on the snow-covered hill. I'd made a mutually beneficial arrangement to watch the farmhouse, since the Cornell campus was shut down for this semester and very likely the next. Zayde was weathering the pandemic at my sister's place in LA (another little piece of my support system was constant cute photos of my nieces on Snapchat), and what little work the farm itself needed this time of year was mostly left to contractors, who I didn't have to interact with. So it was quiet here, and it was quiet as a mouse down in East Ithaca, with the notable exception of the high-energy sciences laboratory. That lay a scant half-mile away at the foot of the hill. Coming back from my walk along the creek that afternoon, I could just hear the faint hum of transformers.

Because it was so quiet, it came as especially startling when it happened. I had just finished making dinner, tofu with black bean sauce, I think, so I was doing dishes right in front of the kitchen window. A blue flash in the periphery of my sight left a ghostly impression, and then a white flash. Every light in the house flickered, as I ran to the dining room to see what the hell was going on; an unearthly screech came ripping up the hill, followed by a BANG like a lightning bolt at close range. I made it to the big bay window.

The upper east wing of the lab was belching flames of an unholy crimson.

They danced hypnotically, and when I say that I do mean it. I must have zoned out for a couple minutes. Then I snapped back to attention; I could have sworn I saw a red streak fly away from the building, just then, in the direction of the woods south of here. It was already gone from the corner of my eye, though.

As I stood there alert but confused, a procession of emergency vehicles began to arrive. Fire trucks, then police, then SWAT, then a trio of unmarked black SUVs. The DoD protecting its research investments. In the half hour or so that I stood watching, they got the fire mostly under control. But those top two levels of east wing were donezo. At last I dragged myself away; it was time to eat my food before it was room temperature, and give Sid a call. This shit was unnerving.

I slept fitfully that night. No dreams of the demon, but plenty of dreams of crimson infernos, of me with different parts, extra parts, suffused with unearthly red aura, falling through holes in spacetime and drifting between far-flung worlds, where utterly alien creatures nursed unspeakable desires...

It was close to noon the next day when I finally rolled out of bed and into my signature gay-farmer overalls. I went about my routines in my quiet outskirt of my quiet town, but the absence of electrical hum out on the perimeter was surprisingly loud in my head. I felt dim and inscrutable foreboding.

2

Several hours, a delicious plate of leftovers and a generous dab later, I was huddled by the space heater upstairs, reading smut on the iPad. This was "date night" and I was determined not to let mere malaise stand in its way. I had the lights dimmed, I was wearing my dick with a small vibrator tucked in the harness pocket, and I was fucking my ass with a tentacle dildo I'd recently bought on Etsy, knees spread wide lying on my back.

You could say I have high standards. See, I used to believe I didn't deserve the lover I wanted, and it got me into a lot of un-fun situations. Homophobes, chasers and all manner of lazy morons, put off by my jumbo sized clit, usually only interested in one particular piece of my plumbing instead of me as a whole person. I'd since realized that I am worth more, and besides, I can fuck myself a lot better than someone like that ever could.

Unfortunately, I hadn't gotten very far into the main event when I was interrupted by a crash from outside, from the general direction of the sheds. I tensed from surprise and the dildo shot out halfway to the end of the bed. I sighed, hurriedly threw off the hardware and threw on sweats, and ran outside with a flashlight. I figured it was wild animals trying to get into the storehouse. Wouldn't be the first time.

But when I got to the sheds, there was no sign anything had happened at all. Windows and doorlocks were intact. All was quiet. Too quiet. I came back around in sight of the house, and just then, I shuddered. Again I could've sworn something had streaked across my field of vision. I looked toward the house, and saw nothing. Yet something set my heart pounding fruitlessly against the walls of its cage.

I was alone. No one to see me act like a silly child, so I abandoned pretense and sprinted to the door.

Thirty yards, nothing.

Twenty yards, still nothing.

Ten yards... a diffuse red glow rose up out of the bushes. Conscious thought lagged behind, I was running on adrenaline and reflex. A moment later, I was at the door, throwing it wide, almost forgetting to shut it, slamming it, trying the lock, omigod why isn't it locking, holy shit it isn't shut all the way, holy shit there's an arm in the door, a clawed hand shit shit shit...

I opened the door and slammed it repeatedly. Terrifying awareness began to seep in. The arm in the door broke off and clattered to the floor, and finally the door closed and the lock clicked.

LET US IN! came a voice within my own head. A talon twitched uselessly on the floor a moment, and then... rancid red light began pouring in under the door, suffusing the severed limb with monstrous essence. I bounded up the stairs. But just as I was bouncing off the wall at the first landing, I heard, STOP, and for some reason I did.

Staring down from the landing I finally found my voice: "What in hell are you?"

HELL? The voice snorted and laughed. A CRUDE TITLE FOR THE OUTER REALM, BUT IT WILL DO. YES. WE ARE OF THE REALM.

"Demon, what do you want?"

WHAT DO YOU WANT? IT WAS YOU WHO CALLED TO US.

"Called you? How?!" As I watched, the arm became whole again, and then a hulking thorax growing outward and upward. And another arm. And another. All suffused with crimson glow.

WE WERE DRAWN TO YOUR DREAMS. OF EMBODIMENT, OF AFFIRMATION. OF LIVING AS YOU PICTURE YOURSELF.

"Wait. That was... you?"

YES.

"You came to me in my dreams, three versions of you, and you--you seduced me. You fucked me good and hard."

WAS THAT WRONG? WE ARE ACADEMICALLY CURIOUS WHETHER THAT WAS WRONG.

Such was the pull of the Anomaly's words in my head that I forgot fear, drawn into the conversation.

"Honestly? No, I thought it was hot as hell. Although, now it has me a bit fucked up. Like I must still be dreaming somehow."

OF ALL THE SAPIENT RACES WE'VE MET, ONLY HUMANS HAVE THIS UNFORTUNATE CONFUSION ABOUT WHICH REALM THEY'RE IN.

"I'm pretty sure this is not a dream. Where I am right now has none of the features of my dreams. I'm dressed normal, I look normal. I'm not sporting that dream peen."

TRUE.

"And yet, you're here. It doesn't work like that. Monsters from my dreams aren't supposed to just show up in the real world."

NORMALLY, NO. THE OUTER REALM AND YOURS DO NOT TOUCH, EXCEPT IN DREAMS. BUT THEN FOOLISH HUMANS MADE A SMALL HOLE IN REALITY. THEY DO NOT EVEN REALIZE WHAT THEY'VE DONE. BUT WE DID.

"Convenient. And you're offering me this embodiment? You would change my body in exchange for what, my soul? My servitude?" Terror was still floating in the back of my mind, not forgotten. It noticed first that the formless was taking form, a disorderly heap of extra arms and faces and things less human-like. More importantly, a form with two legs. Legs that were testing themselves out. Legs that were ready to move.

NOT EXACTLY. YOU HUMANS AND YOUR MYTHS. WOULD YOU BELIEVE THAT WE ARE SIMPLY PLEASED TO HELP WHEN WE HAVE THE MEANS?

"Call me a skeptic." I tried to keep my voice steady. The entity was slowly stepping forward.

WELL. IF TRANSACTION IS WHAT YOU UNDERSTAND, THERE IS SOMETHING WE REQUIRE.

"What? Sex?" The Anomaly stood silently at the foot of the stairs now, either lost in thought or preoccupied with working its newly formed body parts. This body had several misshapen faces still trying to arrange themselves, trying to figure out how to speak. Finally one of them coughed, took several ragged breaths, and said in an androgynous rasp,

"Yessss. Hah. Sexssss. Your, hah, waking, hah, flesh."

I was speechless.

"It's been a, hah, long time, hah, you see."

The Anomaly was coming up the stairs slowly now, and I still stood at the landing, transfixed by what I was hearing. Fear and arousal mixed with utter shock at the proposition. Here was a real life monster, the very one from my dreams; and now as then, its seven arms and legs sported an intimidating variety of digits, pincers, suckers and more. Eyes winked where they shouldn't. Fanged mouths licked themselves. Orifices puckered in and out of existence. Thick black hair covered the groin, but its sway hinted at more fun surprises.

"I'm... not saying no, but I have questions. How can I trust you?"

"Hah. You can, trust us or not. Hah. If we wanted a, hah, victim, we could have taken, anyone. Hah. We have seen, your mind. Hah. We knew, you would, say yes. Hah."

They crested the stairs slowly, torso heaving and heads bobbing.

I quivered with adrenaline as I reached out to caress the face growing out the left side of their chest. The skin felt like fruit leather; the teeth flashed a grim smile that nearly made me retract. Nearly. I fought back against the pit forming in my stomach, smiled, and drew a thoughtful breath. "Top? Or bottom?"

"We like to... hah... multitask."

Four slick arms shot out to grab me. My breath was stolen as I lifted off the carpet and slammed against the wall. Suckers and beaks tugged and tore haphazardly at my clothes. The scythe-like blade of an arthropod claw made several long slices that utterly destroyed the sweater and belt. My jeans slipped down my thighs and were casually tossed aside.

Goose pimples broke out all over my body. My exposed chest felt cold, but my ears were like the surface of the sun.

"Are you sure you can do this without hurting me?"

Strangely, the thing seemed to be finding its vocal cadence in the midst of this chaotic exertion. "Yesss. Hah. We may not know, social graces, but we know bodies. Hah. Your hardware, it's so fragile. You honor us, human, with your sex. We'll keep you safe."

As they said this, a distinctly mammal-like hand slid up my neck. The heel of it pressed gently but surely at my throat, not enough to choke me out but enough to make an impression. I sighed deeply and let my head tip back. A face, not human but close, feminine, loomed over me and smiled with mouth wide open. I caught a glimpse of a tongue that seemed to have its own tiny teeth and aperture.

"Shall we, kiss? Real face, to real face?"

3

I nodded slightly. My mouth opened to speak, but gazing into those otherworldly red eyes I could find no words, so it closed again. Then the plump-lipped face of the Anomaly was upon me, kissing me, gentle but insistent, darting briefly into my mouth with a powerful tongue that grabbed and released my own. Suckers caressed my neck and collarbone as they lifted me even higher off the floor. When our faces parted, I gazed down into their strange crimson eyes and moaned.

"Take me to bed," I said dreamily. "Wait, where are my manners. I haven't even asked your name!"

They had pulled me closer to scale the rest of the stairs, but at this they paused. "It is... a challenge for, human tongues. We prefer, not to use it."

"May I call you Ana then? For Anomaly."

"Yes. Yes, that is perfect."

"First door on the left, thanks. Um. Ana. There's something I have to tell you."

"You need not, worry, about the details of your anatomy. Not with us." As they spoke, Ana laid me down like the gentlest of human lovers, and gave my stomach an oddly reassuring thump with their squidlike foot-pod. The sucker-covered arm that supported my back now wrapped around my underboobs.

"I just generally don't use the front hole. Okay?"

"Of course. And these?" The face I thought of as Ana was smiling placidly at me and my breasts. The face growing out of their chest, meanwhile, was examining my strap-on with a quizzical frown.

"Those are fair game. Oh, wow." I shuddered as they traced my areola. Another arm wasted no time in finding my clit. Hard edged little suckers and drooling taste bud-like projections grasped and licked at me, sending a stream of airy tingles and flickering pleasure flames up my spine. After several delightful minutes, they firmed their grip and began to rock back and forth, pushing and pulling at my bits much like a human hand.

"Oh God, I'm gonna come."

"Yessss." They smiled broadly, and then with three of their arms, flipped me over onto my hands and knees as casually as I might have flipped a flapjack on the stove. I spread my legs and approvingly backed into them, and reached back with one hand to hold their arm. The rocking got faster, and the flames licked hotter until I was right at the edge of climax.

"Yesss, come for us." I could feel the mattress shift under Ana's weight as they positioned themself behind me, and then, I was startled by warm slick wetness pressing against my ass.

It is amazing how much a tentacle and its finger-like tip can feel like a tongue. Both are essentially long muscles anchored to nothing, able to move around and change shape while maintaining constant volume. The tentacle licked all around the rim of my asshole, one direction than the other, and I careened over the edge into orgasm land. I could feel my engorged clitoris shuddering with every spasm, and slickness continuing to leak from around my front hole.

Then just as my trembling subsided and my muscles began to relax, the tongue-like pod began to narrow and thrust itself little by little inside my ass. Here comes the main act. How could a night like this not involve a little ass probing?

"Oh, fuck!"

I felt the fullness inside me. I'd never been penetrated so rapidly and with such grace. There was no pain, and I realized with a shiver that it was because the pod didn't have to press its bulk through my butthole. It deformed itself to be finger-thin, slipped through, and then reinflated itself. When I clenched up, it didn't resist, it squashed down to almost nothing and waited for me to relent. Gradually I eased into relaxation and the stalk expanded.

Soon, I could feel Ana hunched over me. Their one human hand pressed down on the small of my back for support as the footpod thrust in and out of my ass. One arm still wrapped my chest, and one enveloped my clit and worked it like the head of a cock. I growled with pleasure. Already I was building up to a second orgasm.

"This is lovely. But what can I do for you?"

"All of this, is for me," they said. "I can taste your pleasure, hah, and mine."

"Isn't there something selfish you'd like?"

"We could... sample your pain, as well..."

Gently the tentacle withdrew from my ass. There was an audible swish... and a shock of pain as the pod flattened itself into a paddle and crashed against the back of my right thigh. Those chitinous little suckers that seemed so innocuous could really bite when fully exposed.

I cried out, in spite of myself. They paddled me again and again, hitting one butt cheek then the other, as air hissed between my gritted teeth. The sting it left was exquisite. I'm not a heavy pain bottom, so this was a little out of my comfort zone; but they managed to keep back from the edge of what I could handle. And their deft touch on my bits had me wanting to sink into, not run from, the experience.

"You're, hah, quiet." Ana was bent over me, some close that I could feel the breath of their speech on my neck.

"I'm good. Hnngh!" Sharp teeth sank into the meat of my shoulder, and the pod slipped back into my ass. Again and again I felt the icy bites - carefully measured to only just break the skin. I could still feel pain in my cheeks. A single drop of blood ran cold and wet down my back and ass. But beneath the skin, hot white light was spreading through my entire abdomen, from a focal point at the encircled clitoris.

This wasn't some humdrum little orgasm coming. This was Loma Prieta, this was Krakatoa, this was Chixulub.

"Oh god..."

I gripped the headboard with white knuckles and I screamed. Every clench of my pelvic muscles pulled the stiffened pod inside me, pressing it against the tender places. I squirted hard, and it splashed off the arm of my monstrous companion and onto my calves.

"Yesss. The power."

My legs gave out. I ground out the last of my orgasm in a trembling heap on the soaked sheets.

"I think... I need a minute," I said, before I rolled over and passed out.

4

When I awoke, I didn't know what time it was. The unmistakable smell of breakfast impinged upon my nose. I looked left, and saw a plate of fried eggs and a glass of OJ on the nightstand; and behind them, a red blur that my brain vaguely registered as the Anomaly.

"Eat," they said. "You need replenishment. We may have, ah, used you, too aggressively."

"You cooked?"

"Unfertilized dinosaur ova, sterilized by fire. We relate to your species' penchant for destruction."

"Okay, well, thanks. I don't suppose you know how to make coffee?"

They did not. I dragged myself out of bed and trudged downstairs, despite feeling slightly hung over. Sex with a demon really does take a lot out of you.

When I returned, I realized something about Ana was very different.

They still stood about 6'6", but with a more humanoid form. Same face, same leathery skin, same flickering crimson eyes, but a distinctly Baphomet floor plan. Two horns, two big breasts, two arms, two powerful legs, a thick mound of pubes, a tail at least a meter long, and an ASS that made me want to bust out the strap immediately.

"It's you. The succubus from my dreams."

"You like it, yes?. It is a human archetype. Listen. I fed well on you, yesterday, and there is something I want you to have. Before I leave." Ana seemed to be fishing something out of a pocket, except the pocket was made out of thin air.