All Comments on 'Shoes Make the Mom Ch. 01'

Wow, this story has it all. A sexy mommy, a young good looking son who doesn't know what hit him, and a long slow torturous tease. Oh and did I mention the fuck me pumps? A great first story and can't wait to see where the author takes it next.

great story, the format was interesting and clever, well done!

The format made this story very hard to read.

I thought the format was really clever and heightened the story's eroticism.

It had an almost poetic quality.

I hope you continue with this story and I look forward to seeing other stories as well.

I loved how you saw what she said and what she was really thinking. I'll be looking to follow your future work closely. Bravo!

Every once in a while on here you find a pefectly written story! This is one.

Very well written, really good format no problem understanding story. Looking forward to more chapters

One of the best stories I've read in a while....

Huge points for originality!

great story and great execution. really great build. Can't wait for part 2.

This was defintiely one of the best stories I've read in a long time. A long slow sensual buildup and a quick orgasmic finish. Hoepfully, you'll submit more stories, perhaps even an addition to this story, although don't ask me how you can top it. Why didn't this story get an editors best vote.

Wonderful writing. Please write more. Really it is one of the best I've read in a looong time. I'm anxious to see what those shoes do next

Maybe, the best, the most intriguingi, the best written story I red in Literotica for these years. I hope read more soon.

I cannot believe this is your first story here! Everything has the glittering perfection of a diamond!

You must continue this story and you must keep writing many others!

You will be the one of the kings of femdom!

Take me as your biggest fan from now on!

That was so hot. Can't wait for part 2.

Okay, so Incest is not really my genre, but I do have a thing for shoes and stockings (on women I hasten to add!) But from the first word, I was drawn in to the colourful pink world of these heels and Melanie. Superbly written, well paced, and delightfully erotic, with little need for full blown blow-by-blow account of sexual activity, the thoughs and pictures form in the readers head. Please - do post more of this soon, I can't wait for the next chapter!

That was so amazingly hot. I really love the small inserts of what she is really thinking. A few of them should have been moved to a word before or after their current locations, but the concept itself is great. Can't wait for the next installment(s).

???????

Interesting slow burn to finish. The interweaving of whatever prompted her vs her conscious thoughts are an intriguing touch. A delightful ambiguity as to whether the shoes were prompting her or did they answer a unconscious need she voiced. Sometimes fuck-me pumps are just fuck-me pumps.

More chapters, please!

Clearly a labor of love! Slow buildup, thoughts revealed, great tension, unique format- deliciously erotic- one of the best I've read! Great effort!

Hey! Kevsta must have been reading my mind when he wrote his comments. LOL That's what I was going to say. ;)

Definitely not my genre but curiosity got the better of me when I saw so many glowing comments on the feedback portal. Then I started to read and found my favorite color featured so prominently; I was hooked.

Beautifully written, this piece completely drew me in with its interesting and uncommon (for LIt) style. I was enchanted by Melinda and Jake. The almost dream-like quality of their journey from shoebox to date was so well done that it was quite believable.

I'm interested to see what the fallout will be so I'll be checking for new chapters.

Awesome build up, at first I thought the actual sex came on too quickly but then I thought that there is only so much we can tease andother or ourselves before we surcome. Great story, would be interested to see how it pacs out.

Great story, of course I expected nothing else from you. My favorite part of the story was the restuarant scene. So exceptional the way you described the mother controlling her son. I read a lot stories and you are my favorite author by far. If/when you continue this story we are all in for a treat. Thanks.

One of the best incest stories I've read in a long time! Extremely creative use of form and language, heightening the erotic level up to a place where most stories rarely go! Bravo - Can't wait to see the next!

Just wanted to thank everybody for their comments on the first chapter of "Shoes Make the Mom," and assure y'all that chapter two is well on its way!

I love stories that break away from the standard "fuck me harder son" dialog. Nice transition to voicing the naughty thoughts toward the end. At first I was a little put off by the baby talk but now I think it helped heighten the incestuous relationship. I'm not sure about the guilt from Mom at the end though ... particularly after buying into her calculating seduction. Nice job.

Superb work as always, and I should know.

Pilot.

I absolutely loved the theme of the story with the mom slowly deciding to dominate and control her son. The dialogue concept with voicing the inner, naughty thoughts was also a great idea. However, I think you used dialogue, both inner and actual, to move the story along rather than actions and feelings by the mother and son. In the climax of the story, the at-home date, the mother did not dominate the son at all. She got him drunk and then fucked him? I strongly encourage you to research the main tenets of domination and control and you'll be able to write a terrific, titillating story that builds and flows smoothly. I also agree with another commenter that the baby talk became excessive rather quickly. All in all, thank you for a very good story. I only write such a long comment since I truly want to see how great a story can be written with these two characters.

This is excellent!

Wow, I find the style of this story incredibly, incredibly distracting. I see what you were doing and where you were going with the internal/external dialog, but I just find myself zoning out on the internal, completely uninterested in breaking the flow of what is otherwise atmospheric writing. I mean, right out of the gate you establish an intensity between mother-son with an air of mystery. It's just too bad it keeps getting interrupted.

Quote:"I'm not sure about the guilt from Mom at the end though ... particularly after buying into her calculating seduction."

I am, or at least was, in agreement when I first read it. Then I thought about it and realized the inner dialogue has a sort of addicted thinking to it: "I'll just do this and it will be okay, right?" Slowly but surely blocking out any real sense of what you are doing, like it's a dream, and fanning the flames to where you'll do anything to satisfy the craving. Then after you give in, you wake up and rational thought slams the door open like a SWAT team. Of course, if it happened once, it will definitely happen again. Such is the way of desire. The story gets better with multiple readings. You can read just what she says and get the effect of that, then go back over and follow the inner dialogue to get a truly torrid image. Poor kid; wish I was in his shoes... no pun intended.

Man i am damn glad that i clicked on this link.

Excellent story hope to see more chapters !

Perfect.... absolutely perfect buildup and release.

I absolutely loved this story and am so thrilled to see that there is more to cum.

Due to some recent renewed interest in the story, I figured you all deserved an update on the status of Ch. 2.

Following a series of mishaps and personal misfortunes, the almost-complete draft of chapter 2 was lost, all 40-odd pages of it, and I haven't had the heart to climb that hill again. I apologize for letting fans of the story down - it was quite popular - but I'm always eager to hear story ideas and feedback from readers.

Cheers,

JV

Read the comment "Have I read this before" here above together with the author's excuse, "Update on Ch 02" and you will know why a sequel is not in the coming. Plagiarism is a crime and is only embarrassing to the offender. Find that manuscript and post it, JV.

I loved this story and I'd love to read more by this author, continuing this story or something new.

If it's plagiarised I'd appreciate knowing where I can read the original.

One of the most arousing mom/son stories I've ever read. I loved how you built up the tension between this mature mommy and her young, inexperienced stud son. What I also love is that you didn't screw this up by including any of this unnecessary anal nonsense that seems to be mandatory these days.

Next time could you work in a little voyeurism on the mom? Seeing her in her panties....an upskirt...getting dressed...etc

That's just for my personal amusement lol. Your writing was extremely well done. Thank you - I look forward to more from you!

I don't think that I can stand a long wait for part two. So wonderful.

Desperately waiting for part 2. DESPERATELY.

God, that was one of the best stories I've ever read on this site. Please! Please! Please! right more chapters.

When will the next chapter be up?

I know a while back you said you lost a nearly completed chapter 2, it made you sad and you didn't want to do it over at that time. But I am hoping that by now you feel better. Can you make an effort and write over ch. 02 please. I'll love to see where this story can end up.

Excellent writing and subtexting of personal feelings, wants and desires. This story forces you to read every word as you hang on the edge and wanting to see where it goes...

I would really like to see a continuation of this story if you are still actively writing. I could see this in an Erotica Short Story book.

5/5

A big thumbs up! One of the best stories I've read in a long time. Great slow burn with her inner dialog to push the storyline to its explosive conclusion. So sorry to hear of the loss of Ch. 2. Keep writing - you have real talent!

Your contrast of Melinda's inner and outer voices is masterful. I do hope there's a second chapter, either extant or in production. Bravo! <3

just found this story. very well done.

Very well written story. I love the taboo desires between mother and son and how she teased him until she possessed him, She was indeed his sex goddess. Please please please add a second chapter to this story!!!

Jvalet

So so sorry to read that a second chapter was lost. And that as of now, this is a one off.

However that being said

Erotic overload

I’m willing to read

the naughty bit

and re-read this ribald tale and rate you as a favorite

erotic, mother fuckin’

author!

this sucks! No Part2??! i was reading along, getting all wound up, knowing there's a part 2. Nope! I read your comment that it got lost somehow That very much sucks! 40 pages is way too many anyway, unless you broke it up into four more chapters. So write, already. This is hands down the best Dom mom story, or shall i say part of a story i have ever read. Your use of the thought 'bubbles' running alongside her actual words is a fantastic device.

She is an über-cougar on the prowl for the kill. The son is chum to her shark- he will be subsumed by her need to dominate. Fuck! Write the rest again, if you're still alive! Or hand it off to another author, a most probably lesser author, cuz, DAMN!