Shy Guys Make Good Boys Pt. 02

Like any addict, I was starting to be one step away from that headspace, when falling to it would give me my fix. Just dressing for her after work gave me a sense of satisfaction. And when she answered the door, wearing her knee high boots and another black dress - long sleeved and with a high neck this time - I bowed my head so easily, lifting my eyes in a way I knew she would find pleasing. "Hello, Mistress."

She closed the door behind me and right from the beginning was when I had that sense of something being up. I didn't initially piece it together with that look from our last date as there wasn't much to go off of, but Mistress was feeling... particularly domineering, in a way that was obviously so. She crooked a finger through my collar's O-ring and I staggered. Her eyes flashed in satisfaction when I carefully braced myself against her hallway wall, rather than dare fall against her. "Good boy toy. I missed you already. Why don't you be a good plaything and fix your necklace to me?"

I had to smile with a sense of wicked pleasure, when her eyes made me shiver with both want and fear. This was the reserved, held back Sonya, the version of her that had so calmly gazed at me in the coffee shop, except this version was amplified somehow, for some reason. I wasn't sure why at first, but I adored it. There was so much control in those eyes, of a kind that was nearly sadistic, even while Sonya was not a sadist. "Of course, Mistress." I obeyed with the softest touch yet, kissing her neck with the lightest flick of my tongue in the way she enjoyed most, so that she chuckled under her breath and reached up to stroke my hair.

"Good boy, but I want you in a different way this time. The rules are easy enough." She spoke when she led me to a spare room down the hall, one that I hadn't gotten to see yet. "Just take what you're given. I don't need your help with this scene, although I'll have to give you a different safe word when I want you gagged."

I shuddered at that and then felt all the more submissive when she opened the door to the new room.

It wasn't exactly a dungeon, even while it somewhat was, in the strangest way. You see, there weren't furniture setups in the way that Sulfur's had, but it was clear what the open space was for with all the toys she had on the walls, with the screws in the ceiling and the chains hanging from them. I couldn't keep from looking to her, couldn't keep from smiling, amazed that I had gotten this comfortable with these ideas, enough to manage to smile so normally at her in that space. "Gladiator," I said softly.

Her eyes were wicked. "Exactly that." She was methodical when she lifted my shirt over my head, when I had the realization that for a lot of our forays, she kept me clothed. She seemed to enjoy the sight of me wearing what she told me to that much and I had the faint embarrassment of being stripped naked, that faint insecurity, but it was far away.

My pulse was pacing up and my mind was sinking down, so that I fell to the pleasure of obedience, stripping naked and following her to the chains, where she buckled her favorite studded cuffs to my wrists and used the ceiling chains to tether them above my head, spread wide. Next was the bit gag and I thrilled with the memory of writing about those kinds of gags. She didn't stop there, though, no. She fitted me with a padded blindfold, then went on to bind my ankles apart with floor hooks. Last was the studded leather harness she fitted around me.

She held me at the end of it, her arms on my waist while she kissed my shoulder blades. "Now, yank the chains three times. There's not a lot of slack, but there's enough that it should make a satisfying amount of noise." When I did it, she was right and I nodded that I understood, wondering at the headspace I fell into so easily.

It was suffocating, defeating. All she'd done was had that look in her eyes and tethered me in her bondage, but it was more bondage than she'd given me thus far and maybe that was part of it. I think maybe it was more that I had always been going to break for her, but it was a slow, even descent. I felt like her plaything, like a toy to amuse her, and that would have bothered me before. As it was, with her careful playing with me, it was starting to thrill me when it only made me fly higher, when it felt so damned good. With my blood's racing, my skin tingled.

"You said you wanted to learn more to please me a few times now. And so far, everything we've done has leaned heavily to domination and submission." I shuddered when I felt the crop's leather slap trail across my thighs, the softest, threatening trace. She seemed to decide on a softer sensation, rather than pain, though, and I hissed out a breath when she stroked the crop ever so gently across my balls through the cage bars, suffering in a different way. For a moment, I remembered Christopher's implying that pleasure could be a more sadistic control than pain and tried to shift on my feet in my cuffs, only to remember how strictly I was held. She laughed delicately when I fell still instead, suffering with a shudder, accepting it when it was my place in all this to accept what she wanted.

"This is me giving up just a little. I'll show you some of what comes with that, with pleasing me and being more heavily mine. Just a little." I heard a small sound, like the click of a cap being opened, when she pulled away and then shivered when she came back to me, her small hand so light with so much threat behind it. "For instance, I'm rather fond of making my male submissives into anal loving sluts."

I barked out a rough cry behind the bit gag and made fists in the chains, but it wasn't to yank them. Her laughter was chime like when she pressed her lubricated fingertips to my asshole and the cock cage was suddenly a new level of confusing hell. "But oh, look at you. Maybe this won't even take long, little plaything." I hissed, thinking that I should have been yanking the chains and instead, I was falling off another ledge a little deeper into something dark, something that was far more out of my control. It was another drop in the downward spiral.

Because I couldn't do it. I couldn't stop her. That should have frightened me but somehow, I wasn't even as frightened as I would have expected. I was more numb to it and all I did was moan in acceptance when she ever so gently started with one of her fingers, working it inside of me so that I whimpered, so that I turned hotter than hell and then felt the punishment that came from trying to get hard and then couldn't control that when that was something that always made me excited. No, I couldn't feel nearly as much fear as I should have for something like that.

It's another moment I like looking back on, when it really is kind of romantic in a darker sense. See, now I can tell you what it was. The truth? Fear is for people who have a choice, who can take their out. Acceptance is for those who can't.

"Good boy toy." Jesus fuck. Her soft coo of a praise felt like ecstasy and I moaned, riding back against her fingering me, so that she purred and added another finger. "I got you a training plug that night when I got toys, baby, along with a strap-on just for you. But it will be a while before I can use that second one." It was torture in the sweetest, most all encompassing way. "Just take what I give you and let it happen, so I can introduce you to your new anal toy. If you take to it, you'll be wearing it a lot."

I moaned again at that, shaking when all I could really do was take what she was giving me. I certainly couldn't think enough to do anything else.

I dreaded it when she pulled away, already understanding what came next. Sure enough, when she came back, it wasn't her fingers she pressed to my hole. It was the end of a butt plug and she gave me the first taste of her reprimand when I resisted, shocking me when she so swiftly took the strap and struck it across my thigh, so that I barked out another animal sound. "No, open up for me and behave yourself. Besides, it's okay. I love anal play and I want you to like it with me, baby. Trust me."

Trust her. I bowed my head, fists still clenched, but I opened for her obediently with the realization that I did trust her. Holy hell, I trusted her with a hell of a lot actually. Sonya, a goddess both kind and merciless in her own way. I whimpered when she pressed the plug to me and this time it opened me up.

To me, it felt large, but I had never done anything with anal before, so anything probably would have. Even so, my whimpers of fear turned into begging gasps around my bit gag so seamlessly that in my thoughtless state, I couldn't even remember when the painful pressure turned into something my body processed as pleasure. It was an exceedingly strange kind of pleasure, though.

Because it still hurt. It definitely did when I wasn't used to these sensations, but it blitzed my subspace into something that made the rest of the world disappear. The only thing left was her and obeying what pleased her and holy fucking God, it was intense. I let it happen without fighting because it was pure fiery pleasure even in the pain. Hell, the pain only made it better, only made it more wonderful when she cooed at my side.

"Such a good plaything you're being. Look at how hard you're fucking back on this toy." I let my head fall back in a desperate gesture to do anything at all, when I was too tightly bound and that was really the only action I was left with. It was true, that I was bucking back against her and she wasn't letting the plug seat inside of me, instead making sure that I fucked back to the widest part, stretching my hole open almost viciously. She trailed the strap up my thigh and I whined, kind of hoping for a lick of pain when maybe pain would help me take back some control over the rampant pleasure that would have been wonderful.

Except for my cock cage.

She wasn't kind enough to do that, but she did let the plug finally seat inside of me, so that the stretching sensation was replaced by a sense of fullness that felt a little too good, but at least the motion was a still one, so that I could attempt to process all the sensation I had.

Mistress took the moment to remove the blindfold and I blinked, wondering at how the image of everything seemed to change. I couldn't focus on anything except for her. She was the only one who could take this whirlwind and make it make sense. She was the only one who could give me satisfaction when my satisfaction was reliant on her pleasure. "Look at you. You don't know what to feel." I whimpered and she laughed, her eyes alive in a way that I hadn't seen before. It was in that state that it clicked, actually, when all I could think of was her and what she would want.

She was riding a control high, you see, and it sank in that this was the way she was balancing out the emotions she felt on our dates. This was how she was finding her way to keep control over herself, in a way that satisfied her sense of need for self control.

I had the thought that I adored her in that moment, more than ever. Her hand wasn't cruel in the slightest when she grabbed me by my hair, but it was deliciously strict. "Now, let's play a little trade game. I said that I enjoyed anal play too and I think I remember you saying you had problems giving harsher sensation. Let me teach you a little while we have fun with you on your knees and you show me how well you can lick and worship pussy."

I made a soft noise of dread and understanding, holding still while she released my tethers and gag, then fell to my knees at her slightest touch, taking the lubricant with a feeling of terror that I might hurt her.

But then she pressed my face to her pussy and I lapped her like she liked most, moaning when she made that soft cry of pleasure above me, the same one she always gave when I started correctly. She was drenched off of this level of control and it made me close my eyes, grateful to her when she let me enjoy the taste of her for a moment, when she purred above me happily. "How good you've gotten with your tongue. We just need to give you more practice, baby, but I'm perfectly okay with that, with keeping you caged and with a toy in your asshole while you can eat me out for as long as I think you need." Jesus, every word out of her mouth only tortured me and made her more wet and it was perfect that it did.

I only pulled away to answer, my voice sounding so far away. "Yes, Mistress. Thank you, Mistress."

Her laughter was a satisfied kind. "Of course. Now, let's play a little harder. Use the lubricant on your fingers and you're going to finger my asshole with it like I just did to yours."

"Yes, Mistress." God, it was terrifying. Something about that state of mind made the thought of harming her in the slightest seem like the worst kind of anathema.

In the end, though? I couldn't keep from obeying and I did it to the sound of her sharp cry over me, one of the ones I was becoming addicted to. I finally lifted my eyes from admiring her pussy, when that was becoming something I bowed to, and stared up to see her clasping her tits, her face lifted back in ecstasy. "Good boy. I didn't say to stop licking." I hurried to obey that, filling her with my tongue in tandem with working my fingers gently inside of her ass, so freaking gently.

She rode me... and rode me. I don't know how long she kept me like that. I only know that by the time she finished and pulled away, I had long since ceased to expect or think of asking for orgasm. I suffered through the torment of the cock cage by thinking of the next flick of my tongue and the next stroke of my fingers, and then the next, and then the next. There was nothing but mindless desire and fire, nothing but her voice to tell me what to do and I would have done anything she said.

"Good boy toy." She pulled away to stroke my hair, though, bending down to lick some of her cum from my lips. "That's a gorgeous look."

"Thank you, Mistress." I closed my eyes and leaned into her hand, while she enjoyed petting me. Whenever I looked up at her, she was staring back with a contented gaze, as if the sight comforted her, so that I looked back down. Bowing.

When she shook herself and unlocked my cock cage, I jolted with a hiss at the slightest provocation and she laughed, taking her thong where she'd put it to the side and raising it my cock head. "Now you're going to cum for me, nice and hard in my thong again, so that you can suck it clean afterwards, little plaything." I raised to her when she lifted me with a hand in my hair, crouching down to jerk me slowly. "Look at me, Ryan." Like I could have looked away. I stared up into her eyes, trying like hell to wait for her permission when I could have hit a fucking wall with the force of the orgasm from that level of excitement.

She finally took mercy on me, whispering the command. "Cum for me, baby." And I didn't think there was anyway she could have made it better, when I didn't think anything could have made it more intense, but she found a way.

She slapped my face and I shouted, a kind of snarl that was as pained as it was gleeful. Her laughter rang in my ear when I could finally hear again, when every last orgasm she gave me somehow felt more powerful than the one before it. I was on my hands and knees when I could think straight again and her hand was in my hair. She lifted my face, raising the thong to my lips. "Open."

I did that, parting my lips to take her preferred gag for me, only flinching a little at the taste.

She took the strap and used it around my neck to lift my head back, rather than the crop that time, and I thrilled to that small rush of slightest violence coming from her smaller stature. "Suck and let's hear how happy you are to do it this time, little plaything. Moan for me, too."

I sucked. And moaned nice and loud.

But the last piece of the puzzle came from after a scene like that. She seemed to find her way back to her controlled comfort zone and I got the joy of bathing her, of being allowed to rub her shoulders. I got to flirt with her again, to tease her, and it was okay because she'd found her balance again. It wasn't something I could fully empathize with, but it was something I could notice, something I could tell and try to understand.

The dangerous fire in her eyes was lessened and sated, you see, and I had the subservient thought that I rather enjoyed her slaking that need on my body.

--------

It went from there. She worked in a balance that fascinated me and every date or scene felt like something new to learn about her. One time, she was showing me another restaurant she liked and I learned her religious views.

"I was raised in a highly conservative and Christian household and hated being told what to think. So, naturally, I'm a loud mouthed atheist."

It'd made me howl with laughter and she asked me the same, so that I considered it thoughtfully. "I don't know, actually. I haven't truly cared enough to think about it."

"No? Really? See, that is fascinating when your mind never seems to freaking shut up. See, it took me a while to realize that too, but now I know what some of those facial expressions of yours are."

I had to grin with the thought of my silences that were filled with long, mental pathways. At work, while fixing a spreadsheet for my boss, for instance, I'd entertained myself with the mental philosophy question that went like this: If you created a small, trial generation of artificial intelligence units and placed them in an Earth-like environment, how long would it take for them to naturally form groups and what was the statistical likelihood that AI created by a grouping species (humans) would never actually become a group oriented species?

Truth be told, I only refused ADD medication because being medically dependent sounded tiresome.

I looked back to meet her eyes, softly saying, "That's not entirely true anymore. There is one time when it shuts up, Mistress."

Her eyes turned warm with the look of fire and affection she could have and she fingered my cage key where it was always on her neck for our dates, so that I ached to serve. It was a moment of quiet when she knew which moments made me be still, even better than I did.

And then I would get a call a few days later, when I was at work. Her soft voice would give me an invitation that started with, "Are you doing anything tonight, plaything?"

"No, Mistress." I started to thrill by the second one, to smile with the thought that Mistress needed to comfort herself on my chains and that I enjoyed the fuck out of that thought.

"Would you like to come and play?"

It made me shiver with her past threat of the strap-on that she'd gotten for me, when she'd cooed over me that night to tell me it would hurt and she'd turn me into her little anal gaping slut with it. "Yes, please, Mistress," I answered breathlessly.

But she didn't cross that line. She did give me the plug again, but it was to make me dress over it and to see me on my knees in her favorite outfit for me, while I whimpered for mercy, while she stroked me with the riding crop. "I was kind enough to give you a puppy mask, but it occurred to me that puppies don't eat in the same way I've let you get away with."

I bowed at her heels to eat from a dog bowl, throbbing with desire from the humiliation, especially when she only reiterated it with the crop to lick my shoulders with it. She made me finish that with what she called her puppy's treat.

Her pussy. I whimpered, shifting on the toy she'd stuffed me with, sinking lower than low into darkest subspace, lapping her until she orgasmed again and again, until she was spent, even with her sex drive as wild as it was. "I think we'll keep you waiting this time, when desire just does so much for you, little boy toy. Let's see how hot it makes you." It made me choke on a soft moan, so that she shushed me ever so encouragingly. "No, no. No whining about it. You've been so good for me and you can do this. I'll be a kind Mistress and give you practice in these things. Since that anal toy is for long term wear, after we shower and I clean it and your cock cage, we can give you a night of practice with both. Why don't you ask me for it?"