All Comments on 'Sister Affair'

Entertaining!

Wow is that a great story or what. I'd hope there was a continue of their (Gabe & Stephinie) but I can't how you could, still that was awesome.

What a kick ass story! Can there be a part 2? Where does one go from here?

Liked it very much but how was the Gabe/Jenny marriage a

Sham?

I loved the ending with the simple letter to explain the pregnancy. Not sure how you could do it, but would love to see you continue this story.

A complete story with a happy ending.

A pleasure to read the well written story that's smooth flowing and well presented.

Thanks, I enjoyed reading the work.

Great story, and the ending with the letter was quite an excellent way to end the story.

Take love for granted, and you will lose it. I really loved this story!

I adore romantic bro/sis stories, and this one was very, very nice.

Still, the story seemed to lose much of its romantic punch right about the time the pregnancy was revealed. The embezzlement plot device got Jenny out of the way and got Gabe and Stephanie together, but it also soured the romantic ambiance.

The problem (for me, anyway) was that the romantic ambiance never fully recovered, even though Gabe and Stephanie were going to marry. Half a dozen or so paragraphs describing their wedded bliss over the next few years (or decades, preferably) could have gone a long way toward recovering that mood. IMO, anyway.

Nevertheless, it was a great story and a pleasure to read. Stephanie's development from apparent sleazy slut to good girl was especially well done, I thought, and added tremendously to the romance.

I look forward to reading anything else you have written/ will write.

I must say, you really wrote a great tale, and I love the way you ended it, what with the wife being an embezzler! Robert Ludlum couldn't have done it better. Thank you for sharing this story with us, and please continue to write more tales in this vein.

Liked the level of description, just right for the story. Hope there's a sequel.

The sex scenes could have been more. I mean once they had done the deed, we could have had more encounters before things ended. The build up was well done and realistic, then it all seemed over too fast. A minor observation only. You write very well. I'll read some more of your submissions.

Thanks for a good read.

MPP

My level of expectations, in regards to reading more of your work, has just skyrocketed. This is the first story of yours that I have read and it was phenomenal. I must say "thank you" to dezurtdawg, since I found on his bio that you are one of his favorite authors and he is one of mine. That prompted me to check you out. Your ability to successfully incorporate the five critical elements necessary to a 'quality written' short story is to be highly commended! You pulled me into your story so completely that I forgot my initial motivation for even being on this site...to read erotica and more specifically the sub-genre of taboo/incest.

Bravo to you and a big THANK YOU! I eagerly look forward to reading more of your work.

I LOVED this story, and that last stab towards Jenny was SOOO worth it... bitch deserved it too!

I won't say it was perfect but it was one story that had me reading every single line. WRITE MORE!!!

Loved every word

Loved the ending. :)

Wow, great story. Great plot as well as characters. Should write more about them. More chapters please.

The characterization of Gabriel and Stephanie stretch my suspension of disbelief to the limit, though Stephanie's is more believable. In this story they have both said to each other in not so many words that they want each other, though it isn't said explicitly. And still they do nothing about it for years. As per Gabriel's characterization, he is portrayed as either have the patience of a saint, or a complete idiot. My bet is the combination of both. I mean, how blatant it is short of asking to fuck her, to have your sister give you good looks at her naked body. I myself, if presented with a scenario of nude sister giving a chance for good looks, the first words that would come out of my mouth is, "can I also touch you?", and let the chips falls as it may.

J [drazvich(at)live(dot)com]

That last part was brilliant!

Now that was a good ending...

Keep up the good work.

Should he really have told that the kid was his? Then again, he got his revenge. You should write more about the two.

Have you considered writing and publishing a full length novel. You really should, you stories are well written with good use of english, a good plot, characters and twists. You should should give it a bash, perhaps a story/novel for the main stream. Thanks. Len

PLEASE write more like this and about this story! You should write a book! Best I've read in a while!

Love your story!! You have an amazing talent!! (:

OMG i applaud your little note to jenny, nice! hope to read more

i like the sweet romance in this story. it makes me feel all lightheaded and the whole time reading your story i wished they didnt get caught, coz i was afraid of consequences for steph and gabe. something like seperating them, jenny divorcing gabe and taking everything from him, the disappointment of steph's and gabe's mother...

still i have some critism about one of the characters in your story: i do understand the part jenny plays - someone always has to be the witch in cute stories - but somehow i don't like the way you make her act. she's all the bad beast, with no good in her, neither love nor care for anyone except maybe herself, while steph is turning quickly into the saint that deserves all the good that happens to her (the pregnancy that jenny was rejected, her brother's love, the face cream company, ...) i don't find jenny's character authentic. she can't get pregnant, so she punishes her husband so he and steph can grow even closer together. it's more like there needed to be some runner-up in the fight for gabe's love (and child) to make steph look even brighter. yah, this is just my opinion, and i accept that there's a lot of different opinions out there. i just wanted to state my thoughts on jenny's character.

the rest of the story was cute anyway, and i soooo want to know the baby's name, and what's going to happen after the marriage :D

kind regards :)

this was good BUT needed atleast one page more to have them get married and the business take also to tell how they explained being married to thier parents. good story but the end just fell flat it was like you deleted the last page before posting.

I love it when a brother and sister marry. Now the boy's got not only the natural right but the totally legal right to stick his fat cock up his sister's cute little twat whenever he feels the slightest urge. He'll blow his brotherly balls up his sister's cunt over and over again, finally fucking a baby up her honeypot. A nice little souvenir of their hot incestuous fucks.

pieces just don't mesh together

"That day"; first we're told that when she saw him watching her, that she "smiled and let him look to his hearts content". Yet later; we're told that she looked upon him in horror. So which is it?

I can understand that G & S were fixated upon each other from that day forward; without really realizing it, because we're all told "Incest is bad - you don't think that way about / towards siblings". She loved the attention & the thrill; which unfortunately she couldn't get from anyone else. I know of real life people who ignored "their best friend"; went through relationships left & right looking for perfection. Then after way too many years; realize that they it had been in front of them the entire time. Usually what had happened though was that ONE knew all along and just waited, biding their time, saving themself for the other. Unfortunately; the end result was that it was either on a death bed when the realization came about; or it was otherwise too late to do anything about it..

As stated by others; nothing about Jenny "adds up"! Why is G marrying her? There doesn't seem to be any real connection between them, even at the wedding. Jen is upset that Stephanie is stealing her attention; but when she catches Gabe with a hard-on immediately after dancing with his sister, she's NOT jealous or furious. Then she leaves the marital bed "while in the middle of love making" to get a picture taken, WTH!!! She should not have answered the phone, the aunt could've waited for an hour or so (I actually thought that Jen was going to meet "a lover"). Later; Jen sees the interaction between G & S but has her move in, doesn't make any sense.

I don't see that J & G relationship ever had any chance of surviving. A counselor would've caught onto the fact that the couple wasn't really making love or having sex; only going through the motions.

Lastly; Jen would not get off with a warning for embezzlement of $100K and "G" was completely stupid to "WRITE DOWN" that the baby was his. Jen is in the presence of Federal Agents. Jen would've told them what it meant & the agent who saw the note would have to follow-up on it, then they'd be in prison for 10 - 25 years. Leaving the baby to be brought up by Mom.

DKP

You must have met some very strong-looking brick shit houses. It is usually an insult (for a woman) or describes a very muscular and large-proportioned man.

sorry - I meant "strange-looking".

I think it was a pretty good story. Better than a lot of stories i've read on here. I think a lot of people are to hung up on the details. Yes, some of the details are unrealistic. But, this is fantasy fiction. Most of our fantasies are unrealistic, and that's why they're our fantasies and they rarely come true. Keep writing, and always try to improve. That's the best advice anyone can give.

Love the knife twist at the end!! Lol!

Lets get to the fun here! ;

His wife is a bitch, worse she's just basically a frigid bitch that only wants sex to hatch out a kid or three. Ive never understood the overwhelming need some women have to hatch out kids! ...and the way she's been treating him over the whole deal... If I were him I would have filed for a divorce early on and been done with the hounding and misery that shes dishing out on him!

Him and his sister... The dude comes off initially as a pussy, but I guess he fucked her soon enough once things were cleared up, ...however the guy has no fucking balls AT ALL! If she had been 'torturing' him, as he says, you would think he would have just up and told her a loooong time ago that he is IN love with her.... Sure would have made things easier all the way around! He wouldn't have married the ice queen and could have settled down with (previously) slutty sis!

...right here Im at the point where they are about to have her move in with them and hes having the conversation with his wife. ...Im thinking that eventually he will either leave the wife OR sister will be staying there and have the baby for wifie and everyone is happy. Stranger things, and all that!

...backspace to the morning after they had sex for the first time in moms house... I think the guy was totally out of real world character! While sis was acting all glow-y and such, he should have willingly been basically ignoring his sister more to not be obvious. Thats what a guy would really do! So many stories the couple gets outed the next day because they cant keep their eyes off each other and both acting all glow-y and shit, lol.

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"" He felt himself withdrawing from Jenny. Telling himself that if his wife had wanted to, she would have seen the changes and would have done something about it. But the longer it went on the more Gabe was convinced that Jenny didn't really care anymore. The slippery slope of logic led him to believe that she didn't love him, which only drove him to his sister even more. ""

@@ I think she pretty much doesn't. How shes been treating him over this whole child fiasco, her perfunctory, lame sex, pretty straight forward. Not willing to have sex with him at moms house or even play a little, pretty clear. @@

"" He fingered the latch on one of his sister's bags, wondering if he could find her underwear before someone came looking for him. With a growing stiffness in his jeans he left the room, unwilling to risk getting caught over something so frivolous. ""

@@ really?! Thats pretty lame, what is he, like 12? ...besides, dirty ones will be in the hamper in the bathroom later ;) @@

"" "You're what?" Gabe asked incredulously. He was thankful that Jenny had left the house already so he didn't have to keep his voice in check.

"Pregnant," Stephanie answered dully. The little stick still was in her hands, the window clearly showing a plus sign. ""

@@ YES! I knew it! Lol :). ...and I bet the wife had this shit aaaaaaaall planed and has just been waiting for a baby! Lol. I cant believe he almost accused her of fucking someone else, lol. ....still, after all the doctor visits the other two went thru you would have figured they would have sorted out the problem was the wife.

...but the wife... She sees how he wants to fuck her, sees how sister isnt dating around anymore and INVITES her to move in with them! ...and she has to know they're fucking because if he had any idea that she would stop putting out completely when his sister moved in, well any guy would have said HELL NO!, or at the very least been giving his wife daily shit about no sex. He hasnt said anything to her! @@

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@@ OK, heres the bit I just don't get.... @@

"" "Well, I don't think that is going to happen actually," Stephanie said slowly.

"Why not?" Jenny pressed. Gabe tried to hold her back, his hand grabbing her shoulder warningly. "What? Why shouldn't we meet him? What's so secret?"

They could see the hurt in Jenny's eyes. Tears were being barely held in check as she struggled wildly, finally pulling free from Gabe's grip.

"Who was it? Who is the father of your baby?" Jenny stared at her accusingly, the anger plain in her face. "Some guy, huh? Some one night stand you can't even remember. You probably can't even picture his face. I thought you had changed." ""

@@ Why the FUCK should Jenny give a rats ass wether Steph has a boyfriend or had a one night stand and got knocked up? That just makes no fucking sense at all! Shes acting like shes her mother or father or something! Seems pretty out of context to me:( @@

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"" "We're fucked," Stephanie whispered. "Everything is taking off, but its all in her name."

"What do you mean?" Gabe said, confused.

"The face cream, Farthingston, all of it! They've ordered two hundred fifty cases, that's worth over a hundred thousand dollars to us, not to mention the growth it will mean. It's all for nothing," she whispered. ""

@@ whaaaa... What dumbass would do all that work and not have their name on it?! Neither sister or brother bothered to make sure she was part of the business?! Geez! Especially considering what the two are up to! ....well, guess I was wrong about the wife knowing or planning the thing, lol! @@

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"" "You son of a bitch," Jenny whispered softly. "How dare you hit me? I'm your fucking wife. You know what I can do to you?"

@@@ No, your not my fucking wife, my fucking wife would be fucking me and wanting to fuck me all the time!! *I* can call my sister a tramp or a slut, but you sure cant!! @@@

"What? Are you not going to sleep with me more? Kind of hard to cut me off anymore than you already have."

"Oh? Is that what this is about? You wished you would have married some tramp like your sister?"

@@@ Yeah, pretty much! Never dawned on you that what little marriage you had you were flushing down the shitter while smiling about it? Certainly regret marrying you! @@@

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"""Look Jenny, you got one chance to stay out of jail. Turn yourself in, sign some papers and tell them where the other eighty thousand dollars is stashed. Do all that and you might only get probation." ""

@@ yeesh, willing to do federal time and only stole 80k? How stupid can you get? Lol @@

"""Do you know what this means?" she asked as she broke the kiss. "We can get married tomorrow." ""

@@ yeah, just what I'd do right after working with the feds and they're still hanging around AND know thats your sister, hey lets break the law!! Rofl! @@

All in all I really enjoyed the story! It was a pretty fun read and I had a good time with it! Hehe

The sibling romance is sweet, although it could have done perhaps with a bit more fleshing out. The Jenny character is one dimensional and feels a bit forced into the story.

But slapping her? That's a big no no. Gabe just dropped 50 points in sympathy.

Hell, I can't believe he didn't have the marriage annulled the day after the wedding! Who the fuck stops in the middle of getting their pussy eaten, on her wedding day no less, to answer the damned phone?! Then LEAVES to go take pictures with some far flung aunt who had the balls to call their room on their wedding night?!? Fuck that!

...and wanting to get knocked up just after you get married? Hell no!! Relax, travel, vacation, have fun! Not like you're going to be truly free for at least twenty years after you have your last kid, lol. Longer if your luck is shitty! My wife and I didn't want kids, we borrow the nieces and nephews and then give them back after spoiling them, same at Christmas, hehe! For the last twenty years we've had sex in any room we wanted at any time we wanted, went on trips at the drop of a hat without having to plan around school, find sitters or bring the kids along and have to plan events based on them. Our biggest concern is which neighbor to ask to feed and water the cats while we're gone!

Thanks for the great story and happy ending though! Wasn't sure if he was going to get divorced or it was going to be a threesome, lol.

I swear Literotica search function is dumb af. I read this eons ago but couldn't find it however I set in the search. Now by pure chance, found it. Favourited so I don't lose it again.

Loved your other stories but sis too much a whore.

Fast dump 1 star. Sis is a real creep bent on destroying everyone. She needs huge pay back, maybe life in prison.

I enjoyed this STORY. Some of the reader’s comments would lead one to believe that this is, in fact, a true story of actual people. One person wants the wife to get life in prison! Others call the sister a whore. News flash; many men are quite promiscuous. Are they whores? Turn down the self righteousness. Do you ash your sisters for a list or her sexual encounters? No. Besides, there was a entire emotional component to the sisters behaviors. Emotional issues a often quite real.

So much of your story is so excellent, with emotional and sexual content, but it seemed like you dropped the ball twice, in major ways, with the slap and the note at the end.

The first was assault, pretty bad at any time, but especially near the end of a marriage, with so much at stake.

The second gives away the show to a woman who is constantly in touch with the legal system, and who is also very unhappy.

I do not want to lower your rating, but I could only give you four stars, not some appropriate decimal between four and five, so, no rating. You have earned a strong middle 4 like the 4.63 you currently have.

Loved the story, had a great ending. 5/5

(9/2/2022) "Why would she leave her husband, on her wedding night, to go take a silly picture?" When I read that I believed that Jenny was having an affair and the interruption was intentional. She was going to meet her lover. It would have been pretty juicy if that was the case. So I was a bit disappointed when nothing came of it. The sibling relationship was very well done, poignant, and very romantic. But the ending felt rushed to me. It was a good romantic short story. It had the potential for a great Novella or the beginning of a great series if it wasn’t ended so quickly, IMO.