All Comments on 'Sister in the Cabin'

Nice mix of love, romance, tragedy, misunderstanding and all the things that make an intiguing heart warming story.

Looking forward to the next part :)

good story - nicly written looking forward to the next installment

This story has been close to me in a way since my senior year of high school (1994). I never got around to writing it down. The sequel (Sister In Paradise) is basically what inspired this story to begin with. It's a rare case where I had the sequel around long before the first story.

It's kinda hard letting stories out there for the world to see when they are so close to you. I try not to take anything personal when there are critical comments, but still it sometimes hurts.

I appreciate your nice comments though. It eases my mind that others like this story as well. Sometimes things grow and this is one of the stories that started off of a simple idea and grew beyond expectations. I wanted it to take place over time (over years) because I love stories like that, that take you places.

It might be a little while until I get the sequel written. I have the Still Hot! Storyline with 4 more stories to go there. I have another story I am working on with a fellow literotica writer and friend (fantasy kiss) called Room Mates and also the sequel of this story and a non-erotic story. I tend to work on a lot of different things at the same time to keep fresh on each story. When I get bored I move on to the next story and so on until completed.

I'll try to have the sequel written and submitted to Literotica within 2 weeks. Look for it here or on my personal website.

Thanks again for your wonderful comments.

LadysMan

Your story was inspiring emotional and well written, You have a gift to bring your readers into the lives of yoru characters, i truly hope you write on and keep us all enthraled in the lives of You characters.

domthesub@yahoo.ca

I love this story. It was very deep loving and warming story and nice light erotica and very lovely pleasent story. Yea make another installment please thanks crh

This story was just awesome!!! It was spectacularly written, and it just flowed so well. I really enjoyed reading it. OUTSTANDINGLY WELL DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i have read plenty of incest stories but this one captured my heart. first one to bring me to tears it was so amazing. well done.

the story started out good but you ruined it when after the funeral elizabeth said she told his mom about them and the mom said they had her blessings any guy that had feelings for a girl for so many years and told her he would love her and be with her but didn't want to hurt his mom then found out years later that his mom would have blessed them would not have stayed at the cabin after the funeral he would have said why didn't you tell me then instead of letting me die a little each day without you especially after you hooked up with jim you sure didn't love me as much as you said then he would leave go to the lawyer and tell him she could have every thing all he wanted was the cabin and she was to be banned from there after the three months was up try to keep your charicters realistic people do not act like that they hold grudges and are spiteful

I found this to be a very touching love story. I totally disagree with the criticism that your ending "ruined the story". Had I written it myself, that is exactly the ending I would have chosen. Thank you for an excellent story.

I wish that I could give this story a 100%, but I just can't. I love romantic bro/sis incest fantasies more than anything, and it is hell trying to find ones that have happy endings where the siblings stay together.<br><br>That said, my problem with this story began with sis losing her virginity to some sleezebag. I get that maybe she couldn't wait, but it was how it was handled afterward that really sucked. If she was so hot for bro, she sure took him telling her that he saw it happen pretty lightly, and so did he when he found out. Sis: "That was supposed to be you, you dope." Bro: "Oh." The height of romance and passion, that. NOT!<br><br>That was irritating, but what killed everything for me was their first sex in the cabin when he went straight in for anal. I stopped reading at that point. That is just SO un-romantic and smutty, I could no longer read it.<br><br>After ignoring the fact that they aren't even related, then the virginity thing, and finally the anal, I just couldn't ignore enough to make this story work. This is not Romantic Incest Fantasy, it is a smutty pseudo-Romance, and a disappointment even at that.

READING FOR MORE THAN 10 YEARS ON THIS SITE, EVEN IF THIS IS IN THE INCEST SECTION, THAT IS BEST LOVE STORIES I'VE EVER READ, NO INCEST HERE,JUST LOVE. OUTSTANDING WRITTING, LOVED IT.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH,

JERRY

i love brother sister incest when it is done right but this was way to unrealistic when he found out she was seeing someone he would have been pissed he sure wouldn't have gone to see her and after the mom died and she told him that she told his mom and that she would have blessed them he would have got real pissed and told her" WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU SAY SOMETHING BACK THEN YOU OBVIOUSLY DIDN'T REALLY LOVE ME YOU PROVED THAT WHEN YOU HOOKED UP WITH THAT ASSHOLE JIM WHEN THIS IS OVER WE SPLIT EVERYTHING AND I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN" keep it atleast sounding realistic please people especially family do not forgive that easy and they tend to hold grudges stop trying to rewrite human nature it is so hard to find good bro/sis incest stories that are believable you writers seem to think you can totally forget how people react and just write what you want and we will eat it up not so if you want to write a fantacy put it in that area not here

I love romantic incest like this. I disagree with the person above,I think its very realistic. As a matter of fact, you could.write a really good book off this. Good job,.keep up the good work, I really enjoyed it.5 stars

First of all I realized that you wrote the story along time ago, I read through the first third of the story with great enthusiasm. As I was reading this second two thirds of the story it began to feel like one of the longest stories I have ever read. Thinking perhaps I hadn't given the story its proper attention I read it through the second time and realized that you'd put so much effort in putting the fire out that for some reason I miss the chapter where you reignited the blaze.

I will be reading other more recently written stories simply because the first third was pretty good.

real stupid middle and end when the mom asked him to check on her and her boyfriend he would have refused and told her why when asked. at the cousins wedding he would avoid her at all costs. at the funeral again he would avoid her as much as possible when she told him she told his mom about them and she gave her blessings he would be pissed as hell that she didn't tell him right away. all those years she lied to him screwing jimbo no way would he forgive her for that. you started good but royally fucked up the middle and end you killed the love between them and kept killing it. real shame i love good brother sister stories but not to many good ones around including this one.

I very much enjoyed this story AS EROTICA. When people come to read erotica, they're not looking for realism; they're looking for SEX. And this story does pretty well at both sex and teasing the reader. Face it, all you critics here: you're not going to find a Dostoyevsky or Hemingway on Literotica. And it's not just Literorica: read 95% of the famous erotic novels! There are some very good writers on this site, such as LadysMan, and there are a lot more really lame ones. Enjoy the good ones; ignore the bad ones (and the sex isn't usually very good in the bad ones, even if you get past their illiteracy). LadysMan at least knows how to spell and punctuate and make a story interesting.

Altho some comments appear out of touch with reality, I feel their intentions were not meant to be harmful.

As for me...well, I am 86 and have been alone for many years now. I don't do the porn thing and am by no means some weird old pervert that lives down the street. I lived a wonderful marriage and my memories make my life worthwhile. My honeymoon never ended until she passed on and at my age a wise person does not reveal his emotional hunger. That's what brings me to Literotica...I secretly (?) enjoy a romance story, one of real love that includes the release of personal sexual inhibitions, if not too gross. Literotica has a lot of filth, absolute trash for questionable mentalities. Yet, real good romance stories can be found here also.

I have never written a comment before, but definitely feel obliged to do so now. I can't remember when a story as "Sister In The Cabin" has ever captivated me as such. This is the nicest piece of art I have read in years and you should know I am very critical about relationships, enough so to equate your story to the realities of living.

I somehow believe that there was an Elizabeth / Michael in your own life because your story is too real to be otherwise.

I have but one question tho...:

With the talent you have for writing, why in gosh are you placing your works in a smut site where people read at no cost when you could be writing short stories, earning a great income and still draw a fan club...? ? ?

you say you believe in commitment and honesty yet you wrote this story and it has none of it. she was not honest with mike if she was she would have told him about his mother blessing them right away. she sure wasn't commited to mike since she started dating the asshole. do all serious readers a favor and delete this and rewrite it fixing your major fuck ups. as is it sucks and isn't worth the time to read it a total turnoff.

really

Load of rubbish dont write any more

But, it was your story. We, the readers, knew it would happen someday but you dragged it out sooooo long. I did not mark you down because I don't operate that way. Thank you for writing.

wtf was this bullshit, what unrealistic crap. I didn't finish because you lost me as a reader and ill never read anymore from you.quit writing, you don't have the knack for good writing!

Pretty good story. Uve got a knack for writing.

You dragged it on and on and on and then at the end you rushed it up and closed the story. I usually don't criticize so harshly unless the author mixes the names on the characters or never gives an ending. I will try to remember your name and avoid your stories from now on. I read a lot but no more of yours.

He was such a complete idiot!!! There was never anything keeping them apart whether morally or legally other than his irrational fear. He never really talked with her about what she wanted or why; he was never really honest with himself; he was constantly running away from her when the slightest obstacle presented itself. If he really loved her and felt it was his mother that kept them apart, he should have talked to her. She was never going to prevent them from being together.....He was such a fool plain and simple!

I don't get this story at all. It would have made a little more since if they where brother and sister but they weren't. They weren't siblings, hell they weren't even step siblings, They weren't related at all. So there wasn't a damn thing keeping them apart but him. If he really loved her he would have fought for her. I give it a 2, if it made more since I would have gave it a better score.

I have to agree with klaxx. The anal totally ruined the whole thing. I quit reading at that point. Why some of you people who write on this site thinks that it's a good idea to put anal into a story is beyond me. I can't think of anything that ruins a story any quicker other than showing violence or a complete lack of feelings and respect for the individual the main character is supposed to love. Crap!

The anal was a very strange choice and unbelievable for a virgin. It was almost like the male didnt think of anal as being real sex. When he turned down Elizabeth after that I lost most of my sympathy for him.

When he came back for Elizabeth after becoming succesful, I dont understand why her character wouldnt leave her boyfriend at that point. Then the reveal at the end that their mother had blessed the relationship even before Mike had made it as a writer made me lose all sympathy for Elizabeth. All she had to do at that point is pick up the phone and call him and they would have had their happily ever after from the beginning.

The set-up and feelings between the character was good, but their choices throughout were frustrating enough to take me out of the story.

Okay, this story has all the makings of a good long-format novella, but it feels like it is way too long of a story to be summed up in only 3 pages containing multiple years-long gaps. And it has some other issues...

1. Theyre not actually siblings. This was perhaps one of the biggest flaws in logic that the story contained. What is worse, all of the major plot points revolved around Michael's belief that his mother would frown upon their union, even though they aren't actually related.

2. The anal sex scene. This felt so out of place that I was sure it was a dream sequence. After telling Elizabeth that they couldn't be together, Michael then surprises her with anal sex during a stormy night? I'm sorry, but this was so jarring that I almost quit reading there.

3. Michael's constant emotional flip-flopping. Multiple times, Michael seemed to be okay with the idea of being together only to suddenly flip and run off with really no reasoning behind it.

4. Michael's actual reasons for not being with Elizabeth. "MY mother wouldnt approve" or "I want to be financially stable". I'm sorry, but this just doesn't make sense. They are not actual siblings and money should not really be an issue. In my opinion, living together through those tough years of making ends meet and working through those hardships is way more realistic than "I'll come back to you in a few years when I'm rich." That doesnt make any sense. If he really loved her, he would have figured it out, not went years without even talking to her. To me these just felt like shoe-horned excuses put in place for no other reason than to provide some excuse to break them apart for another couple of years. Also, the whole "If mom died i could be with you was a dead giveaway for the ending."

5. Where was Jimmy during the whole wedding? It was never explained where Jimmy was at the wedding. Wouldn't he be sitting next to Elizabeth if they were there together? To me, this whole setup seemed like just a way to get them to experience an intimate moment and to do that you had to throw out the obstacle, Jimmy. But to then bring him back into the picture without any explanation of where he was just doesn't make sense.

6. The mom's death and the aftermath. As i said before, this was very heavily foreshadowed by Michael's comment earlier on. What ruined it for me, other than the fact that it was unnecessary, was that Michael couldn't stop thinking about Elizabeth during the entire funeral. There was so little reaction from Michael about his mom's death, other than finally getting rid of the last obstacle between him and Elizabeth. It's almost as if he wanted her dead. In addition, the comments about all of the men at the funeral made the mom out to be some sort of whore, which I found distasteful.

7. And finally, after years of being apart, Michael and Elizabeth start shacking up the same day as the mom's funeral. Come on, there has got to be some sort of mourning period before the two get it on. His mother and her mother figure just died. Sex probably isn't going to be the first thing on their minds.

All in all, I REALLY wanted to love this story. It had the potential for greatness. I loved it up until the first night at the cabin. It was actually a really romantic story of two people growing up together (not quite siblings) with obvious feeling for each other. But in the end, i just can't get past its multiple shortcomings.

And look, I know "This is Literotica; a place for smut" but I feel like this could be a really good story if expanded and revised a bit. As it stands, it just seemed like you wanted to put way more into it than a 3 page story could contain.

When it comes to plot, emotions and real life, this is truly realistic and fascinating. The character development, the choices and difficulties. It's also very short, Plus the eroticism of it. This is the story with the best plot on literotica.

get past him catching her fucking some guy in the middle of page one. Ruined everything for me.

I liked the writing but I can't stand a character like Mike who always says I'm sorry over and over knowing they both love each other and he won't take the next step. I definitely agree with Anonymous from 3 years ago.

Ok friend, I did enjoy your story. There was romance and drama and a good ending that should have been at the start, but then where would the drama have been. I read the comments and I would say continue writing. Grammar was good, sentences were good and plot was good. Nicely done.

There were a few holes in the story but I just disregarded them.

The communication between the tow was totally lacking. 2 whole years & she didn’t even tell him?

This stretches way too far. The funeral was somewhat shallow compared to the way they felt for each other.

Now I did enjoy reading the story, but I felt something lacking.

Bill S.

That was just such a depressing story in the middle. Mike didn't need to be a dumbass, he should have called his mom at the cabin the morning after they fucked. Why would you torment your characters like that?

It was good, up to when they had sex for the first time. WTF, anal first!?