by geronimo_appleby
This story jumped around without letting the reader know clearly where it was going and it challenges the vocabulary of most people. Non-the-less, it was still sufficiently erotic for most readers of erotic literature.
My guess at what she said..."I'm pretty sure you made me pregnant, brother,"
Ok I like that one ....that sounds like it happend lol good job ...very very nice
Excellently amorous.
Thanks for another teader, G.A. Beautifully written. I'm off to read the next part.
you have talent. for something written fast it had all that was needed to more than get the job done. you have a good command of langage and emotion that comes through. I will be reading all that you have wrtten and look forward to much more. as to the secret .....hum maybe that is where the next story starts. however I would like to hear that daddy was part of it.
For a quick story that got straight to the sex, you were still able to build up the tension and have it hot. This is the first story of yours I've read, so I'll read more. Loved your description and the cliff hanger did leave me wanting to know what will happen next.
You have an excellent command over both erotic narrative and the English language. I sincerely hope you write more often and you write longer stories. You have tremendous talent. Bravo!
I haven't read anything from you in a while and since I just wrote an incest story myself I wanted to read this and compare.
You really described the emotional connection between the siblings well and although it was rushed and short you got the point across. Sometimes a stroke story is what is needed.
This is not a bad peice for a rush, do not take it negitively if people dont understand, as for more. Yes that would be great to understand what happens next.
this was a well if written if roughly written story and a few more chapters to thicken the plot would not hurt
This story is good ( even if anonymous five step didn't think so ) I agree you should not be fishing for compliments but it is up to you weather you continue on or not. If you need further input from us readers I say another ch. or two would be nice. ( not a dozen though )
rules to write by
1) never rush to post always do it right and use a good editor
2) never leave the readers hanging unless you are going to post a new chapter in a few days.
3) never delete comments or block comments
4) if you decide you don't want to continue and the story isn't finished either find another writer to finish for you or delete the story
5) listen to all comments and learn from the readers don't let your ego ruin your stories.
At LEAST a part two .... maybe a part 3 or 4 .... what happens for the next few days?????