Size Queen in Denial

*** Ellen is a faithful wife who hadn't strayed in almost 20 years of marriage, but she has never been faced by such a large temptation before. She couldn't resist, but she swore to herself that it would never happen again. She would be a size queen for just one day... Or is she just a size queen in denial? This is the second story in this series. It will make more sense if you first read "Size Queen For a Day". ***

What the fuck is wrong with me??? I am stabbing a VERY large dildo inside my pussy, so fast and so hard, it is like I am trying to kill something inside me... DEEP inside me. FUCKKKKK. It was hard enough before to keep myself from fantasizing about large cocks fucking me. But after I slipped and gave in that one time, it is fucking impossible to stop thinking about it. Now that I have felt the unimaginable tightness, that stimulated every nerve in my pussy, how can I forget that feeling? Now that I have felt a man invade me so deeply, that it was like he fucked my very soul, how can I not crave this? How can I be satisfied, when my dear, loving husband fucks me and leaves me feeling so unfulfilled, figuratively and literally?

Even now, I know I should feel guilty as fuck, but all I can think about is SLAMMING this large dildo deep inside me and fantasize about that day in the shoe store, the day before my 20th anniversary. I don't even know his name... the salesman from the shoe store. But I clearly remember his amazing cock. It was thicker than my wrist and at least 10 inches. And the way he took control of me, and fucked me forcefully before I could chicken out, he was so dominant and manly. We were like two wild animals, and he threw me down and took me, as if it was his right as the Alpha of the pack. I was powerless to resist his dominance. Well, at least that is what I have been trying to convince myself of, ever since.

The next day was a living Hell. Not only was I physically in great pain, but I was also in great emotional pain. It was the day of our big 20th wedding anniversary, and I felt like I could barely walk. How the HELL was I supposed to dance with my husband. with all of our friends and family watching? Well, obviously I got through that night. Although, I was sure he could feel my whole body flinch, when he grabbed my ass. How could I not, when less than 12 hours before, I had a very thick very long cock brutally fucking my butt hole? And how could he not feel me push away slightly each time he ground his crotch against my swollen and tender pussy? Well at least that night, I was so swollen from my previous hard fucking, that I felt my husband's cock inside me better than ever before in our marriage. I only thank God, that he didn't want to fuck my butt that night. It was a special anniversary, so I would never have denied him, but the idea of even his small cock inside my tender butt hole, made me want to scream.

I thought of all the pain and guilt, as my punishment for straying. I promised myself I would take my punishment and comit to never stray again. Not even for a nice large cock... not even a nice big, thick cock, that fills me in ways my husband's small cock can never... ever... ever fill me. Not even for any of these huge cocks on the men in the porn videos, that I cannot seem to stop watching... not even for one of those big cocks on those big, strong, brutal looking black men... big black cock... BBC... yes, that is what all the videos call them... so big... and so black... so fucking unable to stop brutally fucking my whore pussy, while I watch these videos. "FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK," I scream out loud, as I cum so hard. How is it I cum so hard from THIS, when I couldn't cum with my husband on our special night? I faked it for him. I am pretty sure he bought it. It is not like it was the first time I faked it with him. I mean, all women fake it with their husbands from time to time... don't they?

GOD... I hope I can cum with him again. It will be terrible if I can no longer cum when he fucks me. Can his small cock make me cum anymore? Does my pussy remember what it was like to be really fucked by a really big cock? Is my pussy changed? Am I changed? Will I be doomed to faking orgasms for the rest of my life? Sure, it will be fine for him... he gets to cum, but what about me??? I am WAY too young to give up satisfying sex.

Is that what I think? That sex with my husband is no longer satisfying? Do I feel like it will never be satisfying again, now that I know what it feels like to be fucked by a real cock? I am sure he would never want to think that he can't satisfy me. He will want me to be satisfied. In fact, I am sure he will be miserable if he thought I was unsatisfied. The last thing I want is for my dear husband to be miserable. So, to make sure he is not miserable, it is my duty as his wife, to be satisfied, yes?

This is an interesting dilemma. To keep my husband form being miserable, I will need to make sure I stay satisfied. However, to be truly satisfied, I may have to cheat again, to get a big dick, like the one that satisfied me so thoroughly. To be completely honest, it was the most satisfied I have ever been in my entire life. The real question, is can I feel that completely satisfied again, now that the full reality and guilt of my previous cheating, has set in? I guess the only way to find out, is to try it again, and see how it works out.

Yes, that's it. I need to approach this scientifically. If I do it again and I feel overwhelming guilt, I will make myself forget about it and force myself to be satisfied with my husband's small cock. However, if I do it again, and the satisfaction is as overwhelming as I remember... then what do I do? Well, no sense in worrying about THAT, until I have done the experiment... or should I say, when the experiment does ME?

My GOD... I am fucking drenched AGAIN. Just thinking about all of this, has my pussy desperate. I only wish my mind worked as fast. Right now, my mind is having a hard time figuring out how I go about finding a man with a large cock who will want to fuck me? Well, the wanting to fuck me part shouldn't be that hard. I mean I am pretty hot, especially for 45. I look in the mirror and see how full and round my tits still are. I cup them with my hands and love to see how much spills out around my small hands. Mmmm... my nipples get so fucking big and hard as I trace my fingers over them. I look down the image of me in the mirror. I see the sensual flare of my hips. I turn slightly, to admire the fullness of my ass. I SLAP it with my hand and think about how firm it still is for my age.

As I watch my ass jiggle from the slap, I start to think about the big black man, SLAPPING the full white ass of the women in that last video. Then he SLAPPED her again, but this time with his big back cock... BBC... my GOD... the sound it made when that big cock hit her fleshy ass. It was part SLAP, and part THUMP. Mmmm, the weight of a cock that big... how will it feel in my hands... my small, white hands... Mmmm, and when he SLAPS that big heavy cock across my face, how will that feel? I suddenly realize that I need to find out. I realize that if I am going to give this experiment a truly fair shot, I have to feel what it is like to have a really big black cock... SLAPPING me... fucking me... OWNING me...

I almost run to my computer, to see where I need to go to find BBC and the men who wield them. WOW, I sure didn't have to go far to find something. Well, after I first found myself on the actual BBC site, you know, the British TV station? I had to laugh at myself, not making the connection to BBC. Well, I am a smart girl, and once I started looking for black cocks, I found a lot. And when I say a lot, I mean a LOT. I probably would make much better progress in my search, if I didn't keep stopping to fuck my extremely wet pussy. I think I came three times before I stumbled onto the Black Cock Church site. My GOD, I have not been a very religious woman, but I could get VERY devout in THIS church.

Setting up my profile on the site has been a challenge for me. I am still very nervous about what I am doing. Not knowing what to write, I keep it simple and described myself physically, and simply say that I am fascinated by big black cocks and I desperately need to try one. Maybe I shouldn't say desperate? Will guys steer away from a woman if they know she is desperate? I guess I will leave it for now and see how it goes. I took a couple of pictures. Well, to be honest, I must have taken close to a hundred, but I only used the ones that made me look good... the ones that make me look fuckable. I mean, after all, that is what I want, right? I want... no NEED to be fucked by a really big black cock. I submit the profile, and I am immediately disappointed that it says that my profile has to be reviewed and approved, etc. How the FUCK am I supposed to wait, now that I have gone all in, on this decision to get fucked by a big black lover?

Wait I do. It has been two days since I submitted the profile and got some kind of email verification thing. I am not sure if a man can understand what it is like for a woman, who is truly, desperately needy. It is like I can feel my pulse beating... no POUNDING in my sensitive pussy all day. Every move I make, I can feel the slightest contact on my swollen, sensitive pussy lips. I am ready to fucking explode, when I see the email, notifying me that my profile was approved. The notification must have been delayed, because there are also three email notifications that I have messages waiting on the site.

I race to the site and look at the messages and the profiles of the men, who sent them. I am not gonna lie, reading the flattering things they wrote about me and the things that they want to do to me, is a HUGE ego boost. I mean, my husband makes me feel loved and appreciated, but I can't think of the last time he said ANYTHING to me, like what these guys are saying. I stroke my pussy, as I think about all of the things these big black men want to do to me. Then I start to wonder how I will pick one. They are all in my areas and they are all very well built and attractive. One seems to be more romantic and talks about how he will treat me like a queen. Another one, goes right to the nasty. He writes about how he wants to push my face into the mattress, slap my fat white ass, spread my whore legs apart WIDE, and SLAM his big back cock into me, while he squeezes and SLAPS my big white titties. The third guy is sort of in between, but a bit more handsome than the other two.

I would like to say that I went with the romantic guy that wants to treat me like a queen... However, my pussy is doing all of the thinking, so I immediately reply to Mr. Nasty. I tell him how horny he made me feel with his words and asked if he was really man enough to make all of that happen? I also gave him my cell number and Kik name, so that he can make the next move if he is serious.

Mr. Nasty doesn't make me wait. My Kik notification goes off and I see what he wrote, "So, you a nasty white bitch that need some Black Dick, huh?"

I blush reading his message and I am not sure what to write back. After a few minutes, I go with a simple, "Yes. You got what I need?"

"DAMN straight I got what your white ass needs." Then he texts, "Send me a picture right now, so I know that you a real bitch and not some fag playin around."

"Do people really do that?" I wonder, then do as he requested and take a picture of myself in the mirror. Before I send it, I wonder if I should have taken some clothes off or made the picture more sexy? I decide to send this one and see what he does next. I send it with the message, "Here it is, I hope you like."

"What the fuck is this? A better picture came with my damn wallet. Take of the top and show my them big titties," he texts back.

I nervously pull off my top and then my bra. I turn to the side some, so he can see how much my tits stand out from my chest. I tweak my nipples to make them big and hard. I smile seeing how big they are. I send the picture with the message, "You are a very demanding Man. I like that... LOTS."

"Now THAT is what I'm talking about. You got some nice big ole titties. My dark black snake is gonna look amazing sliding between them. Show me your ass now bitch. Don't make me wait."

Oh my GOD, I actually feel electric shocks exploding in my pussy, as I read his message. Not wanting to make him wait, I yank down my skirt and panties so fast, I hear the thin lace of my thong tear a bit. In my mind, I see him tearing my panties off of me, and throwing me face down over the couch. I stop my drifting mind just long enough to snap a few pictures of my ass in the mirror and send them, saying, "I hope you like my big fat white ass. It loves to be SLAPPED..."

"Oh Ima slap that fat white ass fo sho. I'm stroking my black anaconda right now, thinking of pushing it into that fat white ass," he sends back to me, accompanied by a picture of the biggest cock I have ever seen. He has very large hands, and still this big cock is hanging off them, like a snake hanging from a tree.

"My GOD, that is a big fucking cock. How can I possibly take all of that monster inside me????" I respond.

"Oh you gonna take all of it bitch, I will garan-damn tee it. Ima break you if I gots to. Ima ruin you bitch."

Ruin me???? Oh my GOD... I am terrified and thrilled at the same time when I read that. Without thinking twice about it, I reply, "GOD yes, ruin this white bitch. Make me your whore. Break me... break my body... break my mind... break my soul..."

"Oh don't you worry white bitch. Ima do ALL of that and so much more. Ima make you a slave to this Black Dick. You want that don't you white bitch? Tell Daddy, you want to be a slave to his Big Black Dick."

"God YES... Daddy. This white bitch wants you to make her a slave to your Big Black Dick."

"That's a good bitch. When you wanna fuck? Can you fuck now? You wanna fuck at your house? We can fuck here, but I am not sure how you feel about that the first time."

First time??? Was there going to be a second... a third... a more...? I didn't plan on more. But if I tell him it is a onetime thing, will he still want to fuck me? I guess I don't have to tell him it is a onetime thing. Yeah, I am over thinking this. Just go with it and see how it is, I tell myself. I respond honestly, "I am not sure about going to your place, but we can't fuck here. I am married and I share this house with my husband."

He quickly responds, "Like I care if you married or not? Is he there now? If not, make room for Daddy, cause Daddy need to get a nut."

I start to freak out. I can't have him here. I also don't know how I feel about going to a strange man's house, who I don't even know. Then it occurs to me that it would be the same if I met him in a bar or something, and he brought me back to his house. I mean, he has a public profile on the site and there are records of us messaging there. He would be crazy to do anything to me, right? Before I can chicken out, I respond, "OK, I will go to your house, if that is OK."

"Fucking A, it's OK. It's 427 Oak Dr. How long you need to get here? Wear something that will make Daddy happy."

I quickly respond, "Yes Daddy, I can be there in a little over an hour. Where should I park? Should I park down the street or anything?"

"Like I give a FUCK about where you park??? You can drive into the damn living room for all I care. You think you the only desperate white bitch who come by here for the black dick? Just get you fat white ass over here, and don't make Daddy wait."

"Yes Daddy," I text back and then rush to the shower. I don't think I ever showered and dressed so fast in my life. I put on a bright red lace push up bra that makes my 36DD tits look even bigger than they are, as well as a matching thong. My big white ass looks so full and round, especially with that bright red strap splitting it in half. Over this, I put on a nice sexy black mini dress, that shows off my legs really well, and exposes a LOT of my cleavage. I finish this with a tall pair of black high heels. I look at the clock and freak out. I only have about 20 minutes to get to his house. I know the area of town, but put the address in my GPS anyway. I am so nervous, I am sure my brain will go completely blank, if I am not careful.

As I pull into his driveway, I can feel my legs shaking. I am afraid that I will fall on my face when I try to get out of the car. Luckily, I save myself from that embarrassment. As I walk up to the door, I am wildly looking around, trying to see who is around, who might see me going in here, who will know that I am about to cheat on my husband again?

I weakly knock on the door. My knees are almost knocking together, I am so terrified and excited. I realize that I am slightly hopping from foot to foot, like I have to go to the bathroom really bad. My fear spikes and I am ready to turn and run away, when the door flies open.

I look up and realize he is WAY taller and bigger than he looks in his pictures. I feel like my eyes must be WIDE as I stare up at him. I see a big, devilish grin spread across his face, as he sees the look in my eyes. Then I watch as his eyes run down my body. I feel like he is a machine that is scanning my body. I feel naked standing here at his door, like he can see right through my clothes. My heart is pounding. My mind is racing. Is he pleased? Does he like what he sees? Does he still want to fuck me? Does he still want to make me a slave to his Big Black Dick?

As if he can read my mind, he says, "Don't worry white bitch... Daddy likes... Daddy likes a LOT." Then, without another word, his big strong hand grabs my arm and he almost pulls me through the door. As I clear the doorway, he shoves me to the center of the living room and tells me, "Turn around. Show me what you got bitch"

I feel like I am in a trance. I can't look away from him and I can't even think of disobeying him, so I do as he commands. I slowly turn. I don't know why I do it, but I push my butt out, as I turn my back to him. Maybe I want to make sure he sees how big and full my ass is? As I turn the rest of the way, I lean forward slightly, making sure he gets a full view of my ample cleavage.

I don't have to ask if he likes what he sees because he blurts out, "DAMNNN white bitch, you one fine piece of ass. Take off the damn dress. Give me a better look see. Do it sexy like a stripper. You gonna be my sexy white stripper whore. You like that, don't you bitch?"

God help me, but I do, I do fucking love it, I think to myself. So, respond, "Yes Daddy... I do like that..." Then I start to dance to music in my head, as I tease him as long as I can and as good as I can, as I pull my dress up my body, as slowly and sexy as I can. I almost wish I had more clothes on, because the dress if off and gone way too fast.

"Mmmm, I love the red... I especially like how it looks against your pale white skin. Lean forward and shake those big ass titties for me."

I do as he commands. A thrill goes through me as I think of him commanding me, and how I am obeying. As I lean forward, I can feel the weight of my full tits. I start to shake them back and forth and realize that I don't always think about how big they are and how they flop and bounce, especially during rough wild sex. I blush bright red, as I think about how much they are gonna shake and jiggle tonight. I look up and see the look on his face, and I realize I am more right than I realize.

He points to right in front of him and tells me, "Come here bitch. Let me feel those big white titties. I almost trip over my feet, rushing to him, forgetting the heels I am wearing. I actually stumble a bit, as I try to stop in front of him. He reaches out and catches me by my tits. His big black hands are palming my tits, like they are two very pale white basketballs. I feel him squeeze them and weigh them in his hands. He takes his hands off them and SLAP, he slaps them each from the sides. My tits actually slam together and bounce wildly in my bra. "DAMN, I like THAT," he says, and then SLAPS them together again.