by TheRedChamber
Loving how distinctive your stories are!
Now I want to travel on a Chinese train!
I especially enjoy how instinctively sexual
these strangers are...The international language limitations...
conquered by Universal Congress! :+))
Set in a cramped train carriage, this is an expansive tale of differing nationals coming together for a journey into unexpected sexual excitement. Descriptive and well-paced, it's a pleasing debut.
Quibble: a few typos and, early on in the same paragraph, Mei's short skirt becomes denim shorts.
An excellent first story. You have real talent. Your descriptions are vivid and your voice is very strong.
Congrats on your first story and I hope you'll be writing more.