Something Missing from My Dresser Ch. 02

When Sunday came I went about my usual routine of getting ready for my day. I spent a bit more time getting ready but nothing close to dolling myself up. I wore navy, rather ordinary, panties under my black yoga pants. The pants hugged my figure in a very complimentary way. I put a loose fitting white T-shirt on with no bra underneath. When I looked in the mirror my expression caught my eye. It was hard to put my finger on but it was a look of bad girl self-satisfaction. I was ready for this.

The hours it took for the afternoon was pure agony. I went to my study to mess around on the computer and listen to music in an effort to pass the time; bring us to a moment of truth. I couldn't focus on anything and the minutes seemed to go backwards at times. I knew Justin was home but I hadn't seen him. I closed the door ensuring that he would have to cross that boundary to make his intentions known. I left my phone in my bedroom; text messages would not be enough this time. Every moment brought the unknown closer; my nerves felt my every pulse. I wanted him to succeed, I wanted him to claim his victory but I had no idea how.

Once I heard the door shut, and the car start, I felt my nerves tighten. I expected it. I looked straight at my computer screen. The bittersweet melody of Born to Die was playing softly through the speakers setting a melancholy mood. I heard the door open but I didn't look back; I could feel him standing there, watching me. He stayed just beyond the doorway, as if he was expecting something else. I sat with my foot rested on the chair and one knee pulled tight to my chest, allowing the music to calm me.

Eventually I spun the chair just enough to give him a sideways glance, "Do you really want this?" I said rather stoically.

He stalled as if he was a soldier who after perfecting his war cry, found himself lost in battle. Perhaps he expected me to throw myself at his feet. I kept my body language closed and turned my attention back to my computer screen, my chin rested on my knee. He lingered in the same spot; an invisible force prevented his advance.

"Want what?" He said timidly; hoping I would invite him with open arms.

"Are we not done talking yet? If you're going to do it...then do it..." I baited him coldly.

"I will." He said unconvincingly.

Still facing the away "I'm over here." I said flatly.

He closed the door, sealing us in. Slowly, he made his way across the room, feeling each inch of space for a sense of resistance. My heart was racing, a fact I didn't want to give away. I knew that this was the moment. I wanted him to show some courage. He stood behind my chair as I blankly stared at the screen.

"Mom I want to." He said softly.

"Do you?" Playing the femme fatale, I challenged him.

"Yes, mom I want to." He repeated his intention.

"Do you have a condom?" I reminded him of the safe sex talks we had in the past.

"No, I never thought." He stumbled with his words.

"Ok." I said with an implication of agreement that this wasn't going to be safe sex. It was my safe time of the month, so the risk wasn't extreme.

I heard the rustle of my son removing his pants. I didn't look but I could feel the presence of his hard cock pointed right at me. I briskly stood, with my back to him.

I turned left and around without facing him, so that was facing the sofa the long way. I pulled my tight fitting yoga pants to my knees where my panties soon joined them. Bent over with my hands on the armrest I stood on my toes and parted my legs.

If you're going crazy just grab me and take me
I'd follow you down down down, anywhere anywhere

Lana's beautifully icy drawl was somehow fitting to the feeling. The afternoon light came through the venetian blinds in bars and made the little room look more solemn.

"Well are you going to?" I turned my head half way with a look that told him it was now or never.

I saw resolve in his face and knew that I had my answer; he wasn't about to stand down and in that I was proud. He just didn't know exactly what to do. Justin was noticeably nervous. I didn't blame him, I was nervous too.

"Honey, put your hands on my hips, ok." I said with a much warmer voice.

His hands shook as he more put his hands lightly on my lower ribs than my hips.

"No, not that high, in my hip creases and get a grip." I instructed.

"I've never done this before mom." My son explained the awkwardness of his approach.

"It's ok honey, just focus on what you're doing."

Even standing on my toes he is taller than me. Justin, with a firm grasp of my hips, pulled me up slightly as he entered me in a downward angle. I was very wet and he slid in easily. I felt the jerk and pulse immediately. He tried to keep a hold of my hips as he involuntarily slouched over me after ejaculating prematurely.

"Mom I'm sorry!" His voice trembled with alarm.

"Honey, it's ok." I said softly and re-assuredly

"But mom...I didn't mean to...I was awful!" His panicked voice was a mile a minute.

"Honey stop, relax, it's ok. We can work on it." I said in an effort to calm him.

His penis slid out as my feet touched the ground and I stood up with my back to him. I could tell that he thought he disappointed me. Really, nothing could have been further from the truth. He went through with it. Whatever his game was, it had worked. I didn't feel able to stop it. Instead, I felt compelled to encourage it.

"Honey put your hands under my shirt and hold my breasts." On command he hooked his arm around me to rest his palms on my breast.

"Now hold me close and kiss the back of my neck...say nice things." I was trying to teach him about love making.

"Mom it's just that I never...I mean it's so warm...and wet...I just never..." My son whispered in my ear.

"I know...it feels good, right?" I playfully cooed back.

"Mom...it feels so good...like nothing else" His tone was still apologetic, kissing my neck and ear.

"Sweetie, you fucked me."

"...but mom..."

"You...Fucked...Me" I emphasized each word to remind him of his accomplishment.

I could feel his grip get tighter and more confident. I turned my head sideways to meet his kisses mouth to mouth. The heat between us was really building after the awkward breaking of the ice. We were both becoming surer in this liaison. My initial emotional distance had been to protect myself from committing in the event his valour left him on the battle field. I wanted the decision to be his. I was willing to help and participate, but he had to show me he wanted it; that he wasn't going to leave me with my pants down so to speak.

"We can work on it. You want to get me naked?" I said, with a smile, to assure him that the games weren't over just yet.

He released the grip on my breasts and helped my step out of my yoga pants one leg at a time. He relieved me of my t-shirt as I raised my arms straight in the air. The mood had become all together playful. I turned to face him, my son, and smiled seductively. His cock didn't stay down for long. It poked at me, pressed up against my stomach and became enveloped between us as we each kissed without restraint. Whatever he lacked in technique he made up for with passionate fire.

"Let's go again." I managed to say between kisses.

"Where?"

"On the sofa baby." I was already making my way onto my back and spreading my legs as an invitation.

It's not a big sofa. There was enough room for both us without getting too creative, still far from spacious. Much like mounting me from behind, he didn't really know how to approach this. I felt like I was walking a fine line with giving instructions. On one hand, I wanted to help him. On the other, I didn't want to frustrate him or make him feel like he was doing everything wrong. I sided with patience as opposed to commands.

I sensed he was looking for where to put his hands, so without a word, I guided them to my thighs. Once he looked settled, I let me head fall back on the cushion and closed my eyes. His first few attempts were a bit off the target. I did my best to stay still as he took his one hand to hold his penis steady, the other to hold me in place, as he sunk it back into me. He held it deep inside of me, only this time there was no jerk. I usually keep my eyes closed during sex this time however, I opened them to see how he was doing. He had his eyes tight shut and was biting his lower lip. He was trying not to cum.

"It's ok sweetheart...just hold it still...it's ok if it goes off." I said in encouragement and to let him know that I meant it when I said we would work on it.

"Mom...itttss...ook..." His voice was really straining, "...I can do this..."

"I know you can honey...when you're ready pull it out and put it back in..."

He pulled out, completely, in one swift movement. Breathing hard, he pushed back in and held it in again.

I opened my arms toward him and coaxed him into my arms. "Relax sweetie, it's ok, mommy is here...ok?...your with mommy..."

"I love you mom!" My son grunted in my ear.

"And you're doing good, sweetie I love you...take it out a bit...then push down, ok?...Relax.."

He did as he was told and braced me tightly while letting all the air out of his lungs. He had gotten over the over excitement and was pushing in deeper and then relaxing about an inch before pushing again. I could feel the confidence begin to grow, taking control of the sensation.

"I think I'm ok now mom."

"Better than ok honey...fuck me..." I let the last part slip softly from my tongue into his ear.

Still extremely hard and deep inside me, Justin sat up to retake our original position. This time he started to fuck me. I could feel any sense of inadequacy he was feeling being transformed into confidence. My baby was holding my thighs tightly pulling me to meet his thrusts. He was fucking me like a man. I kept my eyes open to observe the metamorphosis. Sweat had built on his brow and the tips or his hair. His gaze was serious and deliberate. The lines on his well-defined face looked sharper as if carved from granite.

He didn't need any more words of encouragement or any more instructions. In the time it took him to adjust to being inside of me the balance of power had shifted. He knew he was in the dominant position over me now, he knew he was the one fucking me. I was filled with a strange mixture of lust and pride; he was doing a fantastic job. Much better than I thought he could have. Justin maintained his stamina through my gasps and moans. Our eyes were locked in a way I've engaged with no other lover. Neither could do any wrong in the others mind.

My orgasm hit from the sheer force of feeling rather than any direct physical stimulation. I could feel it building very deep inside, like a ball of electricity under my stomach, getting ready to explode to every part of my body. I lost control of my eyes, along with my other senses, and they rolled backwards in my head. In the throes of ecstasy any filter I was employing was broken wide open. As is my habit, during orgasm, let dirty talk fill my son's ears.

"Fuck me! I'm cumming! Fuck me! I'm cumming! Fuck me! I'm cumming!" I repeated emphatically.

The cascade of filthy utterances continued to flow. "I'm a slut! Fuck your mother's slutty fucking pussy! Your cock is so big! Fuck me hard! Fuck your slutty mom!"

Somewhere during the middle of my sexual diatribe my son found his release as well. He hoarsely said, "mom...mom...mom...mom..." Over and over as if he was finding satisfaction in the word itself.

He fell down between my arms still saying, "mom...mom...mom", increasing the pause inversely to the intensity of the sound, until he was rambling it in detached amazement.

For the first time, he could see me as a fully sexual being. A side of his mother he was never supposed to see. And for the first time he realized that his own mom is a bit of a bad girl. The realization was sinking in, that I not only had sex, but that I knew how to have sex, that I knew how to be dirty. There was nothing that could have prepared him for such an afternoon.

His penis slipped out of me as his head found my breast where he rested, his cheek pressed firmly. I pulled the blanket over us so we could settle in. I cradled him in my arms and accepted the full weight of his upper body on mine. Despite what we did, I didn't feel dirty, I didn't feel anything remotely close to dirty. Laying together, exhausted from passion, felt strangely natural; more natural than sex has ever felt for me. I felt his sperm leaking out from between my parted legs onto the soon to be stained sofa. I figured that I better clean up a little.

"Honey, I have to go to the washroom." I said gently.

"No, mom...don't leave..."

"I'll be back, it's ok...just need to clean up a bit...ok?"

Eventually Justin relented and allowed me out from under him. Finding my balance after a few steps, I made my way to the main bathroom. I looked in the mirror; my skin seemed to be glowing. I saw the mess he has made. It caused me no hint of shame. I cleaned up, where necessary, but made no attempt to scoop any out. My hair looked shiny. I felt wonderfully vibrant.

When I returned to my study, Justin was sitting upright, naked, on the sofa where we had made love. He was staring straight ahead; he appeared to be without a thought. I walked directly over and sat on his lap so I was facing him with my legs pushed between the sofa cushions. His height became even more obvious in this position as it only brought me to roughly eye level. We were both completely naked. We kissed slowly and fully on the lips. Each kiss confirming what we already knew, we were both happy this happened.

I didn't want to ruin the mood with questions about what was to happen now, but I also knew the moment couldn't last forever. Our relationship was forever changed. We had become lovers. The complications of such matters could wait.

"Are you ok?" I asked inviting him to say whatever was on his mind.

"Mom...mom...I can't believe...mom...that... that...you're so...sexy" He said in wide-eyed wonder.

I started to laugh in conceit at his complement. "You're not so bad yourself stud."

"Did you like it mom?"

As if he even had to ask. "Honey, it was the most wonderful."

"I fucked you good?" He said with bravado.

"Baby, you did it best." I smiled before planting another kiss.