All Comments on 'Something Unexpected'

The way as you described Veronica is awsome.

But the rest of the story is a bit too... short. We just ran through the scenes. For example we should get to know more about Betty's motivation.

And I think it would be more authentic, if you use dialogues not just you say wht the characters said.

I hope, your next story will be much better.

You have the framework for a great scene, but seem too keen to finish it. More descriptive details, dialogue and character insights would have made for a really hot story.

WOW , hot.