All Comments on 'Spell Book Ch. 01'

i like where this is going

I'd love to see more!

A little short for the beginning but the story sounds interesting. Keep it coming

5 stars. Weird and interesting. Looking forward to more. A longer chapter would be much more enjoyable though.

Great start!! Flows well; details are thorough and filled out nicely. Thank you for using commas; most folks don't. ;-)

Keep it up; looking forward to the next chapter.

Sc8

I like the start. Your writing has lots of potential. Keep it up.

Great start. Anxiously awaiting Chapter 2,3,4....

Please don’t make this drag out too long between chapters.

Great start. Lots more please.

Excellent! Looking forward to more!

Good start to a story! Well written, interesting plot line! Look forward to the next instalment.

Keep going loving it.

Bien, le lecteur est envouté!

Moar!

I cant wait for more. Love the story line.

Holy crap this went a lot better than I was expecting. Thanks everybody for all the support! I’m editing Chapter 2, should have it up in a

Thanks for the support everyone! This is amazing! I’ll have Chapter 2 up in the next couple of days. 😁

Overall enjoyable but the beginning didn't flow very well. It's like you were trying to explain everything, even things that didn't need explaining. Gotta sign for packages at the front desk? Okay. Enough said. It's apartment policy and we really don't need to know there'd been a rash of thefts and all that.

Same with the rather casual acceptance of a woman with horns on her head. Up to this point, everything about the world has been normal, so we would expect the guy to freak out or think he was hallucinating, not just casually wonder why the office girl would deny there's a horned woman in the room.

It's only after he's back at his apartment that we start to see that this world is hugely different from our reality with that little line about people being able to fly like superman. Even that, though, causes some logic problems because it doesn't make sense to be thinking magic can't exist even when you're in a world where super-powers do actually exist. How are people flying like superman if they don't have some control over the laws of physics? If that can happen, why would "magic" be completely out of the realm of possibility? He just saw a woman with horns on her head and didn't think twice about it, but magic is beyond the pale?

After he went next door, things started to flow nicely. That was a good interaction and, honestly, I would have led with that rather than all the stuff leading up to it. Everything prior to that point just didn't really make sense because nothing about the world had been explained. By starting with his opening the box, discovering magic and deciding to try forgetting the whole thing... you set it up so things can be explained, but in a more fluid way that makes sense and entertains rather than sounding like an info-bomb.

Great start. Already wanting more.

Yes, more please!

@Ferrumitzal:

You totally skipped over the description of what was on TV in the very first scene, eh bud?

@Gumbyshu, this was great - I love the lightheartedness to it, and I can't wait to see where it goes from here. You're on my favorite-ed authors list for sure!

I’m interested to see where this goes.

Great start to what appears to be leading to a fantastic story!!! Looking forward to reading more!

Like the writing. You're doing a good job of showing the readers what is happening in a natural way, not just flat telling us things that are happening.

Good start! I'll be following the unfolding of this tale!

Great start really enjoyed it +5

Love it!

Good start. Somehow reminds me of wheel of time but sexier

OK, fun start!