All Comments on 'Starting Over Ch. 03'

Abbi trusting Daniel to hypnotize her, not to mention Daniel even knowing HOW to hypnotize her, are over the top unrealistic. And also unnecessary. If Abbi is any good as a trained actor, she shouldn't need hypnosis to submerge herself into a role.

OK, no, I don't get it. In fact I couldn't even read it through (partly because of your parenthetical explanations that you forgot to include or describe in the body of the story), being just too confusing contrived pointless and absurd (I'm sure there's more).

So you are like some sort of processing machine that takes raw materials in the front and spits randomly associated parts and sub assemblies out the back end that, as a piece, have some application or interest, but when you try to assemble the parts you find there is no final construction that makes use of the pieces. Its a mishmash of subplots and randomly scattered back stories and side stories with no central plot or story line. Just Daffy Duck waddling aimlessly, looking for something to fuck.

I hope someday you can bring it all together into something coherent and whole.

And a reasonable review of how to write and then make good off a romance.In fact

I would like to know if there is any chance of doing the series.

A mind working outside the box! Fun read.

Actually, I don't get it. I do wish I was a male at the all female complex.

Continue...

This was a sex-themed story. For those who still want wall-to-wall ultra-graphic sex on every page, I ask that you get a life. For those who are easily offended because I didn’t write exactly what you wanted to read, I’ll say the same thing. I also observe that the people expressing the worst, nasty, most virulent comments have—with few exceptions—either posted as anonymous or have never published a story under their screen names. Reading such comments is pointless.

Write some more chapters the three you wrote was great.

Someone who wrote this, must be terribly wronged by women.

Will there be a part four?

The hypnosis thing was just a tad unbelievable. Maybe if you had posted this in "mind control" it would have been better? Pretty silly stuff, even for fiction.

...then you added the last paragraph, and you seemed to vaguely imply there mght be more. Is there?

I honestly had hoped to see an epilouge about the 2nd wife and how her cheating during the marriage and after the ex husband, her continued sexual plays fucked up both her life and herself so bad.