All Comments on 'Storm Story'

that was an amazing story, perfect length, and not to wordy!

Short and sweet and hot!!!

I tried for a shorter story with less pathos. I have quite a few things that i have been working on and will submit shortly. I welcome all "constructive" feedback.

zombie22

I gotta say, I don't agree with the below comment. Two girls and a guuy can have plenty of fun. ;)

This was a good story. Just enough characterization to make the story believable but not overboard. Some grammar and spelling issues but overall good.

I

Amazing story! Please keep writing!

for example:

"Tara's curly red hair was pulled back into a ponytail and was wearing an oversized green t-shirt that brought out the color in her eyes and exposed her long legs."

In that sentence her HAIR is wearing a t-shirt.

I don't think that is what you intended to say.... ?

why rush the story what happened here should be spread out over weeks or more. you give no background to explain why it happened so fast because you gave no background at all. this should have been chapter two out of three or four not a stand alone.

Very hot !

Absolutely fantastic I’m so horny right now