Striking the Match

"Cute," he added ignoring him, his finger stilling as he looked at Charlie slowly, as if gauging his mood. "You make me forget everything," his finger began to move along his collar bone now, "everyone, nothing matters except you... and me."

His finger had reached his chin and between finger and thumb he turned his face, softly, caressing it as he lowered his lips to his. Charlie was breathless. Both of Noah's hands were on his face now as they kissed, passionately, fervently.

He felt his own hands move and press into his chest, feeling the strong warmth beneath. His fingers clutched at his shirt as Noah leaned into him, over him. The kisses grew more insistent and Charlie felt himself kissing back with equal desire. The scent and taste of him was overpowering, he felt his body begin to react and with a mix of surprise and trepidation, his cock hardening beneath his trousers.

"Fuck Charlie," Noah said, breaking away briefly panting "I can't get enough of you."

"Then don't stop," Charlie whispered, pulling him back onto him, feeling the weight of him and relishing in it. He felt the hard pressure against his leg and it took him a moment to recognise what it was.

His stomach somersaulted at the idea of Noah's cock. But perhaps it was the booze he had drunk, or that he was drunk on Noah, but the idea did not gross him out or turn him off. In fact, it felt incredibly natural as his hand moved lower, brushing down his hard abs beneath his shirt, to the waistband of his trousers, and still lower until he could feel him. He rubbed his hand over the hard lump and felt Noah's breath catch in his mouth. It was an incredible feeling. He kept rubbing and Noah moaned, his tongue dancing his lips firm and yet so soft.

"Can I take off your shirt?" Noah whispered into his neck as he broke the kiss to nuzzle it.

"Yes," Charlie breathed, closing his eyes as he felt Noah's fingers deftly unbutton his shirt. Eagerly Noah began to explore his exposed chest with his mouth, kissing down his sternum right down to his belly button, before working back up again.

"God you turn me on," he growled into his skin and Charlie laughed lightly at the vibrating sensation. He liked the way that Noah was making him feel. He had never felt desired this way, no girl had ever shown him this. It was so hot, and he didn't want it to end. He wanted to show Noah that he felt the same way, but he was never good with his words.

Then don't use words, a small voice in his head said. He grabbed Noah's face and kissed him, a long and entrancing kiss, making his brain feel like time had stopped and at the same time was going at quadruple speed. Choking back the fear he let his hand move to Noah's crotch again, feeling it's firm contents. Then he let it drift up from Noahs crotch, slowly, as if accidental. Then he carefully slipped his hand under the waistband of his trousers. It wasn't hard to find his cock, it felt warm and big in his hand, and he swallowed nervously but he gripped it tightly. The reaction in Noah was immediate. He broke off the kiss and moaned, his forehead resting against Charlie's, his eyes closing. Then his eyes opened, looking him seriously in the face.

"Are you sure you want to? Don't feel pressured."

"I want to," he said and Noah grinned his eyes alight and sparking. How did he do that? How could he be so beautiful and yet somehow belong to him?

He slowly stroked up and down his cock and Noah sighed in response. He reached for the waistband and unbuttoned him, pulling down his trousers and then with only a brief hesitation, his boxers. His cock was large, significantly larger than his own. It stood erect and quivering his hand still holding the base. Noah seemed to be watching his reactions closely with a concerned expression but with excitement twinkling in his eyes.

"Please, I don't want you to feel like you have to-"

"Noah. Shut up."

He began to stroke up and down again and Noah groaned, crushing his lips into his again, taking his breath away. But he continued his firm up and down, getting into a rhythm, listening to Noah's breathing to work out what he liked and what he didn't.

He felt Noah's own hands at his fly's and for a brief moment felt nervous, but he ignored the feeling, closing his eyes and focusing on his hands. But there was no ignoring the feeling of Noah returning the favour beneath his boxers. He moaned softly into his lips and felt Noah's responding smile.

When Noah pulled out his penis he looked down. The way Noah was lent over him meant that their cocks were only centimetres apart. The first time they touched he gasped, but then they knocked again and Noah chucked softly between kisses.

He eventually stopped the kiss, his hand still sending ripples of pleasure through him his silver eyes locked onto Charlie, into him. As if absorbing every detail of his face. Charlie could see tiny light brown freckles on his nose and cheeks. Then he smiled, the mischievous smile that he was beginning to recognise.

He moved down to kneel between Charlie's legs, and before he realised what he was going to do, leaned over and sucked the tip of Charlie's cock into his mouth. He swirled his tongue over it and Charlie's eyelids fluttered.

"Oh fuck," he whispered and Noah seemed to take this as his permission to continue.

He moved inch by inch down his dick, bobbing up and down and always returning back to the tip until eventually Charlie could feel his nose pressing against his pubic bone. Noah began to bob again, but this time much faster. Charlie began to feel the pressure rising that meant he was close. Noah seemed to sense this and sucked him harder than ever.

"I'm gonna cum," Charlie gasped, throwing his head back as suddenly he felt his cock shudder as he came. Noah didn't even hesitate, swallowing with ease and barely a gag. When he withdrew, his smile returned immediately.

"Good?"

"Are you kidding? Amazing," he sighed, but his stomach tightened as he saw Noah's still hard member. He had to return the favour, his fear returned.

He shuffled forward on the sofa, reaching down to his cock, licking his lips nervously.

"I don't want you to go down on me, not yet," Noah said softly, brushing Charlie's hair from his face. "I don't want to push you too quickly."

"It's fine," Charlie said.

"No, you're shaking."

"That's because you were so good, after shock," he said and Noah smiled a disbelieving smile.

"How about a middle ground, you can use your hands. If you want to that is."

Charlie felt relieved despite knowing he wouldn't admit it. He could do that. Noah pulled himself up onto the sofa unbuttoning his shirt.

"Just make sure to aim it around here so it isn't a massive mess."

Charlie did as he was told, and soon Noah was beginning to moan again, his free hand was around Charlie's waist as he leant forward wanking him with one hand and fondling his balls with another. It surprisingly didn't feel wrong, and Noah's enjoyment sent thrills through his body.

"I'm close... really... here..." Noah whispered, and Charlie felt his cock hardening to a rock. In a strange moment of calm, he ignored Noah's instruction and aimed Noah's cock at himself. He felt the sticky ropes of cum splashing onto his chest and lap and felt surprised at his own actions.

Noah panted, gazing at him. Charlie felt a dribble of cum drip into his belly button. Noah laughed incredulously,

"What did you do that for?!"

"I wanted to," Charlie shrugged.

Noah hesitated, still surprised and then grinned, "you look fucking hot."

Charlie smiled sheepishly.

It was almost an hour later that Charlie, showered and wearing some of Noah's clean clothes (that smelt comfortingly of him), checked his phone. Noah's humming just audible over the sound of his own shower running.

The phone lit up to show 8 miscalls. 5 from Lydia, 3 from Ben.

Charlie heart jolted. Ben never called.

He rang him back and he picked up on the first ring.

"Charlie what the fuck. I've been calling you for hours."

"I'm sorry I was... busy. What's wrong?"

"Alice called looking for you."

"Alice? As in Alice Alice?" He asked incredulously. Why was Ben's ex calling for him?

"Yes Alice Alice, fucking hell Charlie. How many Alice's do we know?!"

"Okay okay! What did she want?"

Ben sighed heavily and then said, "It's Lydia. She's in hospital."

"What?" Charlie whispered, leaning against the wall. "What happened?"

"She was bleeding and... they think... fuck. Charlie I don't think I'm the one who should be telling you this, you should call-"

"I swear to god Ben-"

"Ok ok, shit. It's because... because of the baby."

*

"Baby?" Charlie managed to choke out, his mind reeling. "What do you mean?"

"Lydia's pregnant. She has been for a while, at least according to Alice, but didn't know how to tell you... all things considered. Alice knew. So when she started bleeding she called Alice and she drove her there. I think they were worried she was having a miscarriage. But I think she's ok now, Alice said she is stable and baby is ok."

"A miscarriage..." Charlie echoed, his mind still working at half speed. "So... you're saying that the baby is... is..."

"Yours? Yeah. Congrats."

"I- which hospital is she at?"

Charlie got the address and was gathering his things when Noah stepped out of the bathroom, a towel around his waist, drying his hair with another. He stopped as he saw Charlie with his coat on, and it suddenly hit Charlie that he had no idea what he was going to say to Noah. He still didn't really understand how this had happened.

"Are you leaving?" Noah asked, his voice sounding a little hurt.

"Yes, it's Lydia. She's in hospital."

Noah's eyes widened, "oh shit. I'm so sorry, Charlie. What happened?"

"I'm still not entirely sure, but I have to see her, despite everything I still care about her and-"

"Charlie, you don't need to explain. I'm sorry I can't drive you, have you ordered a cab?"

"Yeah, Uber is outside right now."

"Ok, good. I'll talk to you later. Let me know if you need anything."

Grateful for Noah's understanding he breathed out heavily, starting to the door then hesitating. He ran towards him and gave him an awkward hug, his body warm and wet from the shower, his hair dripping onto his shoulder.

"Thank you. For everything. I had... I had the most incredible time," he said, and then quickly darted from the room.

Once at the hospital he was directed to her ward by a night nurse. He half walked half ran down the corridor and then spotted her, just visible through a gap in the curtains around her bed. He halted where he stood, breathless and suddenly the truth hit him.

He walked forward through the curtains and Lydia turned to see him. The moment she saw him, her eyes flooded with tears.

"Charlie," she said, her voice strangled.

He said nothing, he moved in one swift movement and wrapped his arms around her. She felt frail, trembling in his arms and he held her as tight as he could, hearing her sobs, her chest heaving, her heart racing.

"It's ok, I know," he said soothingly again and again. "It's ok."

When they finally broke apart Lydia had stopped trembling, and was blowing her nose on a tissue. She crumpled the tissue into a ball in her palm and gazed at him.

"Charlie I don't know what to say. I'm so sorry I didn't tell you."

"When did you find out?" He asked quietly and she looked down at the tissue in her hands, picking at it anxiously.

"A few weeks ago. When we... broke up, I didn't notice straight away that I hadn't had my period... I think I tried to pretend to myself it wasn't real at first, but eventually I took a test and..."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

She laughed a bitter and humourless laugh, "because you didn't want me anymore. I didn't think it would be fair to use a baby to force you into a relationships. And I was right, Ben eventually caved and told us where you were, that you had gone with Noah."

"That's not fair Lydia. It's not like that and you know it, I still care about you. None of those feelings are gone it's just... different now."

Her eyes filled with tears again and he sighed.

"Let's not fight, you need rest."

"I want to go home, I can't sleep here. I hate hospitals."

Charlie looked around for a nurse and saw Alice lurking off to the side of the curtain, clearly giving them privacy. It was strange seeing her, he hadn't seen her since she and Ben had split, and as much as he wouldn't want to admit it in front of Ben she looked happier and healthier. But at this moment, her eyebrow was furrowed and her eyes full of concern.

"I'll see what I can do, but try to rest for now."

He approached Alice who pulled him into a hug.

"I can imagine how this must feel for you, it must be awful."

At first Charlie assumed she meant Lydia being in hospital but as she continued he realised her layers of meaning.

"When I left Ben it was the hardest thing I've ever done. I still love him. But being with Pete is like finding another piece of myself, it's more than just love. But that doesn't diminish the feelings I had before. Whenever I think of Ben hurting I feel sick. I can't imagine... overcoming your sexuality and... a baby."

He felt a little relieved to hear his own warring emotions mirrored in Alice's words. It made him feel less insane.

"How do you cope with it?" He said, hearing the catch in his voice. The emotions of the night clawing at his throat and stinging his eyes. His chest ached with love and pity for Lydia, and burning desire and longing for Noah. It was like a comforting and predictable river, sparkling blue and inviting, fighting against a crackling fire, it's flames dancing and entrancing. Two complete different emotions fighting over one heart.

"You have to trust your heart, and know whatever decision you make people will get hurt."

"I don't want that," he insisted.

"It's unavoidable," Alice said grimly.

He stood for a moment before shaking his head, "I shouldn't even be discussing this. This isn't about me. I need to be here for Lydia. She wants to go home."

He walked quickly towards a friendly looking nurse and explained Lydia's desire to leave.

"We can do that, we just need someone to make sure they stay with her tonight."

"I will," he said automatically, Alice glancing at him, that same pitying concern on her face as he signed the release form.

It was an hour and a half later when Charlie eventually helped Lydia up the stairs and to her flat door. He quickly turned all the lights on and settled her on the sofa before moving to the bedroom. He found the bloodstained sheets and quickly stripped the bed and remade it with clean sheets. He put the bedding on a wash, cleaned the kitchen and did various jobs to make Lydia feel more at home as she curled up on the sofa watching the tv.

He made her a cup of tea and she sipped it slowly, taking a small bite of the biscuit he had offered. She was yawning widely so Charlie encouraged her to go to bed. She was still a little unsteady on her feet so he walked with her to the bedroom, finding her pyjamas and letting her change whilst he finished sorting the rest of the flat and laying out the spare bedding on the sofa for himself. When he returned to the bed she was tucked under the covers. Despite being tired, and hospital weary, she still managed to look beautiful.

"I'll stay on the sofa tonight, if you need anything just shout ok?"

"No," Lydia said grabbing his hand as he turned to leave. "Stay, just a bit longer?"

He felt his chest tighten, but nodded. He moved around to the other side of the bed and lay above the covers beside her.

She wrapped her arms around him and nuzzled into his chest, her favourite cuddle spot. Almost automatically his arm wrapped around her and began stroking her hair.

"I'm so so sorry Charlie. I must have missed a pill or something..."

"It's fine, it's not your fault."

"It is. Maybe not the baby, but us breaking up. That is my fault. If I hadn't tricked you onto Matched..."

Then he would never have met Noah, Charlie finished in his mind. How could he be angry at her now? When her trickery had enabled their meeting.

"It's okay Lydia. I forgive you," he said and he felt Lydia's sigh of relief. There was a long silence.

"Do you love him?" She asked, her voice so soft he almost missed it. He took a long time before he answered, listening to the screaming emotions inside his body.

"I'm not sure yet, I think... maybe, with time perhaps," he replied, Lydia said nothing. He sighed, "but right now, you need me. Our baby needs me. I'm not going anywhere."

He felt the wet tears drip onto his chest and continued to stroke her hair gently. He thought about his own parents, his mother who had brought him up single handed, his father who wouldn't have even remembered to send him birthday cards without reminders from his mother. He had sworn if he was ever to be a father he would do better, he would stay with his child whatever the cost. He had never expected the cost to be so high or be so painful as this.

"I'm scared," she whispered. "I don't think I can do this on my own. I can't be a - a single mum."

"You won't be. I told you I'm not going anywhere," he said shutting out his chaotic thoughts, doing what he knew was the right thing to do, whether or not he liked it.

"What do you mean?" Lydia said lifting her head to gaze into his face. "You mean you- and me?"

"I love you Lyds, always will. I'm not letting you do this on your own. That's our kid, we're doing his together."

And although he smiled at the tears of relief that sprung from her face, the huge smile, the pink cheeks, although he had pushed all emotions as deep as he could inside him. As he said the words aloud, he still felt the sharp pang in his chest, as his heart was torn in two.

TO BE CONTINUED...?

A/N: I hope you have enjoyed this first part of Striking the Match. If you would like to know what happens to Charlie, Noah, and Lydia next please let me know in the comments below!